Chapter 12 #2
She pulled a piece of parchment from the inner pocket of her skirt and penned the man’s name under Mr. Ewen Brodie’s and Sir Reid Graham’s.
“Talia…” She folded the paper and tucked it back into her pocket. “How do ye feel about me son?”
Talia’s heart thudded. “What do ye mean?”
“Ye two are constantly combative.”
“I didnae ken that he confides in ye about our conversations.” Her lips thinned, and she averted her gaze.
“He doesnae, but I have eyes and ears. Ye cannae expect me to be this old and nae have the means to ken what goes on in me home.” Orlagh came to sit opposite her. “Darragh doesnae ken how to communicate. I understand it might have caused offense, but he is a genuinely good person.”
It was amazing how her brain worked. She could sound somber and gentle while laboring heavy cogs. She was not only mediating, but also studying her with the alertness of a predatory bird.
Talia tried to calm herself because his name sent a thrill through her.
“Darragh’s been speaking to some investors in the railroad sector.
He is looking to buy back the land me husband has lost. With the money from his inheritance, he can save the clan.
He says the industry is quite competitive, so he is desperate.
He has made some investments in new technologies, but they wouldnae start generating income for years now. ”
“He told me about his faither.”
“He usually doesnae like to talk about him. I am surprised.”
“It was in the midst of an argument.”
Orlagh recounted what she had heard from Darragh and more: the gambling, debts, lost lands, broken alliances. The former Laird had wreaked havoc on their clan, and Darragh was now shouldering the burden alone.
In the heat of the moment, Talia had told him that she did not care about his people. It had been a lie she had said to spite him. And now she regretted ever having said it to him.
Orlagh let out a motherly laugh. “I see. I understand he has sequestered himself away for days now. Ye have the right to feel insulted, but please daenae misunderstand him. He isnae avoiding ye. He is just overwhelmed at the moment. When he is feeling better, I am sure he would resume chaperoning ye.”
Talia found that hard to believe. It was too coincidental that he kissed her and then became busy with duties. If he did not want her to misunderstand him, he should never have left her in the room as he had. He should have taken a moment to seek her out and explain things.
Nevertheless, her mind was made up. Since it was a marriage he needed, it was a marriage he would get, and she would do it with or without him.
“I cannae tell if yer disposition has worsened or if those men are the worst of the lot.”
Talia fixed her gaze on the fountain in the garden. When it was quiet enough and the cicadas had gone to sleep, it was possible to hear the water gushing. The window in the morning room offered a full view of the garden, and of the retreating figure of her last suitor.
Moments ago, the man had made a fool of himself and gotten himself kicked out. He made repeated requests for spirits despite several rebuffs. When he realized their resolve was stone cold, he produced a flask from his boots and filled a teacup.
Talia had thought him audacious and wanted to see how much more entertaining things he had up his sleeves, but Amber had been unamused, immediately requesting that he be thrown out.
“Ye should ken, ye threw out the last one.”
She had said it as a joke but there was no humor in her words because Amber was right. Her disposition had worsened. She felt barren, confused even.
“Ye’ve been upset. Tell me what bothers ye.”
Talia opened her mouth to refute her claims, but Amber predicted it.
She wagged one reproachful finger. “Daenae tell me a lie.”
The room did not have a fireplace, but Talia found herself growing hot. Was she about to confide in Amber about childish feelings like a schoolgirl? She was twenty-three, too old for petty romance, if she could call it that. One did not call a kiss stolen on a whim ‘romance.’
“Darragh is avoiding me.”
“Oh, daenae take it to heart. The Laird avoids everyone when he gets in one of his moods.”
“Now he’s avoiding me on purpose.” Talia said joining her on the sofa. “Daenae tell anyone this, but he kissed me.”
She shouldn’t have waited for Amber to drink her cider. She spluttered, coughing out the sweet liquid. “Who. Kissed. ye?”
Talia leaned into her ear and lowered her voice. “We were in his study, and we were arguin’ about one of me suitors and he came closer and it was as though I couldnae breathe and then…” She mimed the action, puckering her lips.
“Surely ye must have dreamed it!”
“Me imagination could never have conceived something so… exhilarating.”
Even when her mind dredged it, played it out so it was more than a three-second caress, it paled in comparison to the real thing. Maybe that was why she was so haunted, because she craved the real thing.
“Do ye realize how exciting this is? The Laird has fallen in love. He is sulkin’ because he doesnae ken how to handle his feelings.”
“Amber, did ye nae hear me? I said he was avoiding me. How could he have fallen in love with me if he’s choosing to avoid me?”
“Darragh hasnae taken a woman to his bed in years. If he is tempted by ye, it can only be love.”
“What ye mean is that lust has caught up to him, and I am now the outlet to take out his frustration on.”
“Daenae be so pessimistic.”
“I am a realist. Other than ye and his maither, there are nay other women in his vicinity. Of course, I awakened his desires.”
Talia was disappointed. There was usually a line separating unmarried women from married women, a code of conduct.
One side should hold their illusions and romanticism dear, and the other side should be more practical, cynical if necessary.
It seemed as though they had crossed into each other’s territory, as if they had never known the other.
She envied Amber. How is marriage so good that she had yet to shed the illusions of maidenhood? Then she soured, because life had not been so good to her and forced her to mature at a young age.
“I am of the mind to believe ye are wrong,” Amber said indignantly. “He isnae chained inside these walls. He could have sought relief outside if he so desired it.”
“And ye’re sure that he hasnae? What about the maids? There are a bunch of them to choose from.”
“Me husband tells me everything, so do the laundry maids.”
“Ye’re frustrating. Why do ye insist that he loves me?”
“Because ye would be perfect together.”
“How do ye ken that? Up until now, ye hadnae suspected anything.”
It would be unnecessary to ponder his feelings. Whether he liked her or not was of no importance, because Talia had not an ounce of love for him.
She tried not to draw a connection between his disappearance and her melancholic state, for she would not like the conclusion.