Chapter 23 #2
With Briar’s help, I put together a date on the dock, complete with a flannel blanket and throw pillows, an umbrella shielding us from the afternoon sun, and a wicker basket loaded with fresh veggie wraps, caprese skewers, berries, a bottle of sparkling water, and an oat milk latte in a thermos.
Afternoon coffee is nonnegotiable for Birdie, and I wasn’t about to make her skip it.
“I think I could stay here forever. It’s so calm and peaceful.” She sighs softly.
I rest my head on her shoulder. “That’s why it’s one of my favorite spots on the ranch. My dad used to bring Heath and me here in the summers to fish, and I like to come whenever I need to clear my head.”
She tilts her head to look back at me. “Have you talked to Heath about your work on the ranch yet?”
“No, but I’ve been thinking about what you said. The cattle operation is growing faster than expected, and he could use more ranch hands—hell, what he really needs is to hire a foreman to keep everything running. So yeah, I think it’s time we talked.”
Lately, the sheriff’s been asking me to pick up more shifts, and that call to help with the aftermath of the bar fight wasn’t the first time I’ve worked straight through the night, taking statements and filing reports.
I’ve always known that juggling both responsibilities wouldn’t be sustainable forever, but nothing had ever been important enough to make me rethink my priorities—until now.
Having gotten a glimpse of what it’s like being with Birdie, I’m ready to do whatever it takes to make it permanent, and I know that something else will eventually have to give.
I just don’t know what that is yet, which is why I need to talk to Heath before making any decisions.
Birdie eases out of my arms and turns to face me, folding her legs beneath her. “That makes me happy to hear.”
“What about you?” I ask. “Still planning to run the sanctuary out of your house?”
She nods, twisting her necklace between her fingers.
“For now. Mr. Grady’s place might be off the table, but I’m not giving up on finding another property.
It’ll probably take a few years, though—everything I make at the feed store goes toward bills and the animals, so there’s not much left over to save for land,” she explains as she picks a strawberry from the picnic basket and pops it into her mouth.
I grimace at my own oversight, not realizing until now that Birdie’s been footing all the expenses for her rescues.
I should’ve known, given it’s not an official operation, but I figured since she’s so damn good at convincing people to take in animals, she’d have already been collecting donations too.
“Have you thought about turning the sanctuary into a nonprofit?” I suggest, leaning back on my hands. “I’m guessing it’d be easier to get donations and apply for grants.”
“I’ve looked into it. I’d need special permits, licenses, and routine inspections. Zoning alone could get me shut down for operating on a residential property. So for now, I’m just doing what I can on my own,” she says, forcing a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes.
An idea floats through my mind of how to solve the problem, but I hold my tongue. Right now, Birdie needs someone to listen and validate what she’s going through—not try to fix things. There will be plenty of time for problem-solving later.
“You’re amazing, Birdie, just don’t forget you’re not in this alone. You’ve got me, my family, and your friends.” I reach over to give her leg a gentle squeeze. “Briar’s had to navigate starting her nonprofit, so I’m sure she’ll want to share everything she’s learned with you when you’re ready.”
“Thanks. I appreciate that.” Birdie pauses, looking out over the lake. “She really does know the process better than anyone. I have no idea how she finds the time to run the foundation, help manage the house construction, and take care of Caleb.”
“She’s amazing and a damn good mom,” I state.
I never expected Briar to be the first of us to have kids, yet she’s taken it all in stride.
Birdie nibbles on another strawberry, chewing thoughtfully before speaking.
“Do you want kids someday?” she asks.
With you? More than anything.
I clear my throat, sitting up straight. “I do.”
“How many?”
“I might be biased, but three seems like a good number. And if I had a daughter, I’d want her to be the youngest, so she’d have two older brothers looking out for her,” I say, grinning as I picture a little girl who’s the spitting image of Birdie.
When my parents adopted Briar, it was like the last puzzle piece finally slid into place for our family.
Not only did she bring Ma the immeasurable joy of having the daughter she’d always wished for, but she also gave Heath and me the chance to grow closer as siblings, united in our goal to love and protect her.
“Three sounds perfect,” Birdie says around another berry, and I let myself imagine she means our future children. “Being an only child can be lonely, and I like to think things might have been easier to get through with siblings.” The last part is barely audible, meant more for herself than me.
When she doesn’t elaborate, I don’t press.
I know more about what she’s been through than she realizes, and I can’t imagine carrying those burdens without anyone to lean on.
At the very least, she should’ve had her dad there to offer her the guidance and strength she deserved.
Instead, he’s buried himself in work when he should have been fully present for his family.
He may believe his reasons are justified, but that doesn’t excuse leaving Birdie to navigate years of hardship on her own.
“Is the infamous Walker Halstead thinking about settling down and starting a family?” Birdie muses.
I move closer and bracket her with my legs, setting my hand on her thigh.
“Birdie,” I say softly.
She studies me, curiosity shining in her eyes. “Yeah?”
“I might have played the field when I was younger, but I left that part of my past behind shortly after I became a deputy.” And realized you were the only one for me.
She frowns slightly, a crease forming between her brows. “You did? How come you never said anything?”
I shrug, glancing at the lake, the sunlight sparkling across the water. “Everyone assumed I hadn’t changed, and I never bothered correcting them. I’m not proud of who I used to be, but I don’t regret it—not when it led me to this moment with you.”
Birdie tilts her head. “What do you mean?”
“We agreed to pretend to date as a ruse so I could teach you, and the only reason you asked me for lessons was because of my experience,” I remind her as I trace circles across her thigh with my thumb. “Without it, I doubt you would’ve suggested the arrangement in the first place.”
“That’s true,” she admits, tension visibly easing from her shoulders. “But I said yes because I trusted you and knew you were the only one who would understand without judging me.”
I give her thigh a light squeeze. “Never. You’re always safe with me.”
Birdie leans in, resting her hand on my cheek. I melt into her touch, letting the warmth settle through me. She meets my gaze, and it’s as if time itself has stopped, leaving only the two of us suspended in the moment.
“Walker, what are we doing?” she whispers, her eyes searching mine, a thousand questions lingering there.
“We’re enjoying a date at the lake,” I murmur, leaning into her hand.
Birdie subtly shakes her head. “No, I mean, what’s happening with us?
This was supposed to be a no-strings arrangement, but it feels like it’s become more than that.
” She looks down at the blanket, drawing in a slow breath before continuing.
“I miss you when we’re not together, and my heart skips a beat whenever you walk into a room.
Sometimes I think you might feel it too, but other times, I wonder if it’s all in my head and this is still just an arrangement to you like it was always meant to be.
” Her voice trembles, unguarded emotion spilling out.
I blink at her in disbelief, trying to process the reality that she just confessed her feelings for me.
It’s not something I thought would ever happen in this lifetime, and as much as I wish I could lay my heart bare, I know it’s better to take things slow and avoid scaring her off.
She’s still sorting out what’s real versus pretend, and I don’t want to push too hard and risk the fragile trust we’ve built.
That trust will be tested soon enough when the truth about what I’ve done for her family comes out. I’m not naive enough to think it’ll stay a secret forever, and there’s a chance she’ll be upset that I kept it from her—but we’ll cross that bridge when it comes.
For now, I’m going to treasure her admission and make the most of our time alone, leaving no doubt in her mind about how much she means to me.
I capture her lips in a soft kiss. “You’re not imagining a thing, Birdie, baby. This is as real as it gets.”