CHAPTER SIX
The cabin was chilly when she woke and she reached down to pull the blanket up to her chin. For the first time since she’d been there she actually felt like she’d gotten some rest. When she rolled onto her side, she realized something wasn’t right.
Titan was missing.
Afraid to get up and discover she’d dreamed it all, she lifted her head slightly so she could look around the room. She needed to see something—his boots, his bag, anything—so that she knew he’d been there.
She brought the pillow to her nose but there wasn’t a trace of him at all. Please, she pleaded to herself. Don’t let this be a dream.
Unable to take it any longer, she pushed the blanket to the floor and rushed to the kitchen. Everything was exactly the way she’d left it on the counter and she breathed a sigh of relief when she spotted not one but two soup bowls next to the sink.
When she didn’t hear the shower running, she feared that he’d left without saying goodbye. Not that he would have a reason to, but it was certainly a possibility.
She walked over to the backdoor and pushed the curtain to the side. At first, she didn’t see him and her heart began to ache. But then she caught a glimpse of him sitting on the bottom porch step. He stared straight ahead, no doubt, his mind a million miles away.
She filled the carafe with water and put on a fresh pot of coffee. While it brewed, she changed into something warmer and pulled on her boots.
She managed to open the backdoor despite having both cups of coffee in her hands and was relieved to find him still in the same spot. She felt a little awkward considering she’d fallen asleep in his arms, but they were both adults. To her knowledge, neither had done anything wrong.
“Good morning. I thought you might would like this.” She held the cup out for him to take but he refused to look at her. Had she done something? Was he mad at her?
She waited a few seconds, trying not to let her emotions get the best of her. She bit down on her lower lip and blinked the tears back. It was possible he hadn’t heard her, so she offered him the cup again. “Titan, I brought you—”
“Just go away,” he demanded through clenched teeth.
“Did I do something wrong? I don’t understand.”
“What part of ‘just go away’ do you not get?” His clipped tone was almost offending. “I want to be left alone.”
Felicia sat the cup of coffee down beside him then lowered her head as she turned to go back inside. To be honest, she didn’t care if he drank the coffee or not. The little bit of excitement she’d felt earlier was long gone.
She took one sip from her cup then poured it down the sink. She hated to waste a perfectly good cup, but she didn’t think she could stomach drinking another swallow.
She decided that it was probably best for her to steer clear of Titan so she grabbed a fresh towel from the hallway closet and closed herself up in the bathroom.
Standing underneath the spray of hot water for way too long, she came to accept that the cabin was just too small for the both of them.
She’d gather up her things and head back home.
She probably needed to get back to work anyway.
The morning hadn’t quite started out as she’d hoped, but at least the rain had stopped.
When she was finished with her shower, she cleaned up the coffee pot and put it away.
She didn’t want to leave the cabin dirty, but if he were planning to stay, there was no reason for her to wash all the linens and remake the bed.
He could dump the trash and toss out anything that would spoil.
It didn’t feel right—she was there first—but she couldn’t fathom one more minute staying there. Unfortunately, he wasn’t the only one affected by her brother’s death but at least she wasn’t being an ass hole, for lack of a better word.
She did one quick sweep of the cabin then closed the door. Perhaps she’d feel like coming back later on, when she knew no one else would be there.
Titan needed help working through his emotions. She still had a lot of questions about the accident, but she’d find the answers elsewhere.
She glanced in the rearview mirror when she reached the end of the drive. She hated the way things had turned out between them, but that was life. The least he could’ve done was told her goodbye.
When she was a little ways down the road, she came to an abrupt stop when she noticed the huge tree laying across the road.
“Are you kidding me?” she said and shifted the car into park.
She climbed out of the car and walked over to examine it closer.
She was expecting to have to deal with some mud and a few limbs along the way, but not an entire tree.
She tried to push it with her foot, but it was too large for her to budge.
“There’s no way you’re going to move that.”
She jerked her head around and quickly brought her hand to her chest. “Titan, you scared the crap out of me!”
Titan walked out from the edge of the woods and stood beside her. “Are you going somewhere?”
She wanted to tell him he didn’t leave her much choice, but she didn’t feel like arguing. “I figured it was best.”
“I wasn’t trying to be a jerk earlier and I certainly don’t want you to leave. It’s just…hard. It’s so fucking hard knowing he’s gone.”
“It’s not fair,” she admitted and turned her head away from him.
He kicked the tree with his boot. “It’s got to get easier. It just has to.”
Felicia didn’t know what to say although she agreed, it definitely needed to get better. However, she wasn’t a yoyo. She wasn’t going to have her emotions played with like a he’d attempted to do.
“I didn’t want to wake you this morning, but I couldn’t sleep.
I mostly wanted to access the damage from the storm, but I came across our old fishing poles in the shed.
God, we loved going down to the stream and fishing.
Some days we didn’t catch a thing and other times we’d have to throw them all back because there’s no way we could clean them all. ”
She stared at the ground, listening to him talk about her brother. She had her own stories to tell, but right now, Titan needed to get it all out.
“There was this one time, Matt and I decided to go camping. Your dad always told us to make sure we didn’t leave any food laying around.
I’m pretty sure it was a momma racoon wanting to feed her babies, but Matt convinced me it was a bear outside of our tent.
I’d never been so scared in all of my life. ”
He eventually sat down on the log and she took the spot next to him. Matt was certainly a character and he’d been lucky to have someone like Titan in his life. When he reached for her hand, she didn’t pull it away.
“Well, what do we do now?” she asked.
He continued to rub his finger over the top of her hand. When he didn’t say anything, she figured he was probably still reminiscing about her brother.
“I’m pretty sure there’s a saw in the shed. It’s a pretty big tree but if we could cut it into smaller pieces, we could probably roll some of it out of the way. At least enough for a vehicle to pass.”
“Please don’t leave. Not yet anyways.”
Titan leaned his head on her shoulder and he began to weep. “Why couldn’t Matt’s life had been spared? Why? Why did he have to die?”