Chapter 34
‘It’s just a few weeks,’ I reiterated to Simon, tugging at his collar as he held me in front of airport security. ‘I’ll be back before you know it and I’ll text you every day.’
‘You’d better.’ Simon smirked. ‘I don’t know what I would do without your GIFs and unintelligible emojis. It’s like using Duolingo but without the three-day trial.’
‘Oh, shut up,’ I said playfully, smoothing out the collar of his khaki jacket.
Since we officially got together, I had become even more attracted to his slightly unkempt public appearance. I even requested that he not shave for a day or two just so I could enjoy the feeling of his light stubble against my chin.
‘It feels like I’ve got sand on my cheeks,’ he had complained that morning.
‘I like it,’ I said, kissing him on his jawline. Since it was only for one day, before we said goodbye at the airport, he let me have my way.
He let me have my way with quite a few things, in fact.
We had barely left his flat after returning from my job interview.
In fact, we nearly missed New Year entirely – it was a good thing he gave up his slot when we went ice skating, otherwise he would have had to leave the bedroom, which would have been a travesty for both of us.
We found our own way of celebrating the New Year.
After all, who needs the South Bank fireworks when you’re making fireworks of your own?
You’d think that, after going so long without a tryst, I’d be out of practice and uncertain, but being with Simon was like finding the perfect puzzle piece. The ‘excuse me’s, awkward requests, and occasional recalibration of leg positions only added to the fun.
‘You’re actually listening to me?’ I said at one point, panting through the gymnastics of Round 2 on the floor of the mezzanine. We had fallen off the bed in the first round.
I was shocked that a man was willing to let a woman take the lead and follow her instructions on exactly what she wanted from a sexual moment without any kind of criticism, suggestion, or refusal.
He laughed breathlessly, red in the face, kissed my neck – an instruction he was particularly fond of – and whispered in my ear, ‘You know I can’t help but do what you ask of me.’
I laughed, a sudden image of green paint and a fluffy Grinch costume coming to mind.
‘You know, I think Josh would drop off that Grinch costume if I asked.’
He had kissed my neck down to my collarbone, definitely leaving a mark.
‘I’d rather be John McClane,’ he teased.
‘Leave it a few years,’ I said, turning to ruffle his light blond hair. ‘And you might be.’
The evening continued in bliss and the days had been nothing but blissful ever since.
We’d found our way into every corner of his flat, breaking blinds, damaging the shower curtain, and, most noticeably, bending a chair leg. Neither of us knew how we did any of these things, our attention was solely on each other.
The New Year midnight countdown had passed us by until eventually, needfully, we had returned to spread ourselves out on his sofa after midnight, wrapped in just a blanket, watching the fireworks and revellers singing ‘Auld Lang Syne’ out of tune on playback on his laptop screen.
It was our way of letting the rest of the world back in.
‘You were my first ever midnight kiss,’ I told him.
‘What did you wish for?’ he asked, turning the channel to a rerun of When Harry Met Sally.
I hadn’t told him. But standing at the airport now, holding tightly onto Simon’s collar and imagining desperately what life would be like when January was over, I wanted him to know.
‘I wish I didn’t have to leave.’
‘It’s just a few weeks,’ he reiterated, and I snuggled into his neck, feeling secure in his grip as he wrapped his arms around me.
‘Will you be here when I get back?’
‘Four hours early,’ he said. ‘Just in case. I might even get a busking slot in for an excuse.’
I could see the cogs turning as he planned.
‘Knowing me, I’ll be four hours late, but I appreciate the anticipation.’ I grinned.
‘I’d find something to do,’ he insisted. ‘Maybe write a jingle or two?’
‘Maybe not perform those.’
He scoffed. ‘They pay the bills.’
‘Well, I can always help with that.’ I quickly pulled away, the sensible Evie coming out. ‘Much later. When we move in, if we move in! We don’t have to move in. Unless you want to. Maybe?’
It was like verbal diarrhoea.
‘A few days in heaven and she’s ready to move in with me.’
Simon was enjoying this a little too much. I rolled my eyes.
‘You know what I meant.’
He nodded, understanding. ‘January will fly by. December did, after all.’
‘And I packed a lot into December,’ I agreed, reminiscing about the igloo and the ice skating, as well as my lovely family Christmas. ‘I’m just going to Canada – to quit a job I haven’t even started. That’s normal, right?’
‘For you, Evie Frost, I’m pretty sure you re-invent normality on a day-to-day basis. But…’ Simon began, elongating the word and a seriousness cast over him. ‘I know this may not be the right time but I want you to know that, if you enjoy it, you can stay if you want to. I won’t be too upset.’
I smiled stiffly, moving a strand of his hair from his forehead as I considered his words. It was admirable of him to offer his support in such a way, but I knew that coming back to London was the right decision for me.
‘Trust me, given how many times I’ve been emailed by Elijah about these bloody TV treatments over Christmas, I’m not going to enjoy it.’
The emails had been getting shorter, yet the demands had increased in each. The sign-off from Elijah had stopped being best and was just his initial ‘E’. And as any office worker knows, that as close to saying ‘fuck you, bitch’ as is politely possible.
When I got a formal warning for slow performance, over Christmas and before my contract had even started, I knew I had made a very good decision to quit before I’d even started.
‘I’m coming home. To London. And to you,’ I promised.
Simon smirked and corrected my bag on my shoulder a little.
‘I’m quite glad to hear that.’
I leaned up for one final lingering kiss. ‘And I’m very glad to hear you say that.’ I stroked his stubble a few more times and eventually pulled away. ‘Right! I have to go or I’ll miss my flight.’
‘You foiled my evil plan,’ Simon joked, still helping me with my bags as we headed towards the growing queue for check-in. ‘Call me when you land, I don’t care what the time difference is. I’ll be awake.’
‘Given how loudly you snore, I doubt you’ll hear the phone ring.’
‘Again, a few days and she’s giving me lip about my snoring,’ Simon said to no one in particular.
‘It’s what girlfriends or partners or…’ I shook my head, not sure what to call myself. ‘… lovers do,’ I finished lamely. ‘I suck at this.’
Simon shrugged nonchalantly as if I had just asked what takeaway we were going to order. ‘Girlfriend works for me, if boyfriend works for you.’
I grinned. ‘You’re so blasé about it.’
He smirked. ‘I have to take after my dad in some way, I suppose.’
‘I hope that was the only way.’
He smiled softly as we reached the cut-off points for goodbye.
Queues to dismantle perfectly packed suitcases, removing all the liquids inside.
I was so glad I had had the foresight to pack my washbag in my handbag for once.
Mostly it was because Simon and I had left his flat so late I needed to do my make-up on the train.
Simon cleared his throat. ‘I texted Dad last night, actually,’ he said suddenly, a rather odd moment to admit it. ‘You’ve inspired me. We’ve put in that lunch.’
‘Without me?’ I won’t lie, I was suddenly envisioning a scene of plates flying and two men shouting in the middle of C?te Brasserie.
‘It’s just a coffee. For the three-course meal I might need you there as a buffer when things get awkward.’
‘Me?’ I said, shocked, pointing at my own chest. ‘What can I do?’
‘You can ask him twenty questions, like you said.’ I vaguely remembered making that joke. Well, it would be interesting to get to know his father in a way other than through TikTok videos.
‘Oh, quickly.’ I pulled out my phone. ‘Can you take a quick video of me at security?’
He sighed, not unkindly but with a slight really? tone. ‘Am I your cameraman now?’
‘Your girlfriend…’ I stressed the word playfully, ‘… is a content creator, so yes. Add it to your CV.’
His hands were shaking with light laughter as he took a quick video of me poncing around in front of the growing queues.
‘It’s a good thing I like you more than a lot, Evie Frost.’
I took my phone back from him, grinning. ‘I like you more than a lot too, Simon Holland. I’m glad I had my Christmas bucket list, so I could meet you.’
Simon nodded appreciatively, kissing my cheek with one final squeeze.
I inhaled his cologne – which I may have stolen a bottle of and put in my washbag – and squeezed back.
‘Wonderful things have happened since.’ Lifting my chin up for one final final kiss.
He lowered his face and hovered inches in front of mine.
‘I support you too, no matter what,’ I added. ‘Whatever you need, I’m here for you. We can even make a list!’
Simon didn’t release me but chuckled. ‘Another list? What’s this one going to include?’
‘Things that make Simon happy? Number one: reconnecting with your dad. Number two…’ I paused, waiting for his input.
‘Meeting his girlfriend at the arrivals lounge four hours early.’
I beamed. ‘Number three?’ I prompted and his hands tightened around my waist.
‘Spend a Christmas in London with his family?’
‘Number four?’ I leaned up just once more.
‘Surprise me,’ Simon said finally.
Oh, I would. I promised myself. He wouldn’t have to worry about that.