Chapter Seven Sera #2
“I’m sorry too. For what I said about your art.
I don’t think it’s kid stuff, really. I just, well, I can’t really play around with hobbies anymore.
My mom really needs to be able to rely on me, and art doesn’t help pay the bills or for Adam’s lacrosse equipment and Oliver’s skateboards—which I swear he keeps wrecking on purpose.
” He shakes his head and laughs. “You should see his kneepads. That kid is fearless.”
“It sounds hard,” I say, feeling guilty again for not having known how tough the divorce has been on him. “And unfair.” I work out carefully how to say what I’m feeling. “They’re your brothers, not your kids.”
“I don’t mind helping,” he says firmly. “I want to be there for them and my mom.”
We come up on the main tent, and Luke pops in to say hi to the organizers, but it quickly becomes clear that he’s one of them too.
While I wait for him to help someone with an issue with the second movie, I stare at the poster taped up beside the tent.
It has an old-school 1940s advertising vibe, with a classic car at a drive-in, an illustration of the footbridge on the screen.
The lines are clean, the font sharp. I can’t believe I missed this. It’s Luke’s.
He reemerges from the tent. “Sorry, being the youngest volunteer means answering a lot of questions about tech. You ready for snacks?”
“Yeah. No. Wait. I think I missed it before because of all the color,” I tease, pointing to the poster, “but this is yours, isn’t it?”
Luke tries to brush it off.
“Yeah, it was cheaper than hiring a real designer.”
“Luke,” I say, “you are a real designer. This is awesome.”
“Thanks. Should we grab the snacks?” He changes the subject quickly, pointing to the line by concessions.
“Yeah.” I fall into step next to him, not sure why he’s being so weird about the poster. Behind us, on-screen, Earth implodes.
I catch Luke watching me watch the movie, and something clicks in my brain.
“Wait…did you pick the movie?” I ask, looking at him.
“Uh…” Luke scratches the back of his neck. “Yeah.” He starts to play with the frayed edges of his T-shirt. “When I knew you’d be here, I switched it. It’s your favorite,” he says.
I reach out and squeeze his hand in thanks.
Even though he has no idea what’s been going on with my health, it feels like he still knows how much this summer means to me.
Luke grips my hand, his calloused palm familiar and warm.
He looks down where we’re linked, then up at me.
The movie is the only thing casting any light, so we’re standing in shadow.
In the dark, his eyes look like a deep, cozy part of the ocean as they hold me there, pinned.
My heart races and my fingers go cold. I should let go.
Why am I not letting go? It’s like the pieces of my heart sitting in his chest are magnets tugging me in.
I feel like I did when we were sixteen, intense and desperate.
I’m heartbroken all over again remembering that I wanted to be with him more than anything, and he…
didn’t. I don’t want him to see what I’m feeling, to pity me.
My eyes flick to his mouth, which is quirked open like he’s about to say something, but before he can, a girl comes out of nowhere and throws her arms around Luke’s neck. He drops my hand like it’s on fire.
“Izzy!” he says, turning to hug the girl back. “When did you get home?”
My stomach turns. Izzy’s a local, a grade above us, and though she didn’t go to Blue Honeybee, she was always around.
Very into music and films and, the last summer I was here, Luke.
I bite my lip, suddenly anxious and uncomfortable.
I would turn and walk away, but that would just invite questions I don’t want to answer.
“Today!” she says, brushing her pink hair out of her eyes.
“I wanted to surprise you.” She tousles the top of his head with a manicured hand, even though she’s barely able to reach.
“You’ve let your hair get long. But you’re wearing the shirt I sent.
” She smirks, tugging on the hem of the T-shirt featuring an anime character I hadn’t known Luke even liked.
Luke laughs and gestures at Izzy’s hair. “I like the pink.”
“Better than the blue from last summer, right?”
“Will it bleed off any less?” Luke teases.
She lightly shoves him. “I ruined one hoodie.”
“My white vintage Pats hoodie,” he reminds her, though he doesn’t actually seem mad.
They’re flirting, I realize like an idiot. Something is clearly going on here that I’ve missed. More than just what I know from two years ago. When Maddy said Luke didn’t do serious, maybe she left Izzy out because she didn’t want to hurt me.
“Sorry,” Izzy says, turning away from Luke to face me. “We’re being rude.”
“Oh, this is my old friend Sera. We’re neighbors. You’ve probably met,” Luke says.
“The heart girl!” It’s apparently now my turn for a hug. “Of course. Glad to see you’re back this summer.”
I clear my throat and find my footing. “Me too,” I say. “Should be a fun summer.” I force a smile.
“There’s nothing quite like the summer before college. You’ll see.” She slides her arm around Luke’s waist, and I feel a lump growing in my throat. “But there’s also nothing quite like coming home either. Can you believe I actually missed Northport?”
“When you had all of Cleveland at your feet?” Luke jokes.
“Did you know it’s landlocked?” Izzy shivers. “Not an ocean for a thousand miles. I felt more myself as soon as I could see the Atlantic.”
I nod like I know what she’s talking about, but I don’t have anything to add. There’s a lake in Ohio, right? A Great Lake? Isn’t that enough water for her? I pinch my lips together in what I hope is a sympathetic grin.
“That’s why I can’t imagine leaving,” Luke says, and it’s my turn to look at him funny. When we were little, all our dreams involved going to see the far corners of the world, getting lucky enough to fly into space for real.
“It’s nice to know you’ll be here.” Izzy plants a kiss on Luke’s cheek.
The ground beneath me tilts like the earth is trying to fling me off. I take a deep breath and stare intently at the head of the guy in front of us. But my eyes keep trailing back to where Luke and Izzy are glued to each other.
Thankfully the line moves forward quickly as a huge group of younger teens move away with their snacks, and I wrench my gaze away from Luke’s hand on Izzy’s hip, embarrassed.
I order all the food and pay, remembering to ask Izzy if she wants anything, and Luke takes two of the trays while I grab the last one.
I’m quiet on the way back to the truck, letting Izzy fill the air around us with updates meant for Luke and Luke only.
The moment from before sits heavy in my chest, so many things unsaid but understood.
We’re just friends. We’re just friends. I repeat it to myself.
As we make it back to Luke’s truck, I’m delighted to see Jackson there. He’s chatting with Luke’s friends about the Red Sox, but he jumps up to help with the tray of food and drinks.
“Thanks,” I say as we hand everything off. “Glad you could make it.”
“I love the drive-in,” he says with a grin. “Couldn’t miss it.” He climbs back into the bed of the pickup truck, then turns and takes my hand, helping me up.
Abbi wiggles her eyebrows at me and helps make space for the two of us to sit on the end next to her and Cam.
Jackson’s arm ends up resting on my leg.
He smells like some sort of spicy cologne, and it’s nice to have the warmth of him next to me as the night continues to cool off.
He’s seen the movie before too, so he doesn’t mind when I end up saying some of the lines quietly to myself before the characters do.
I glance behind me quickly and see Izzy curled up to Luke’s side.
She’s watching the screen, rapt, so I guess she gets points for not hating it.
Luke looks at me, then at Jackson. I see a flash of something unreadable in his eyes.
I turn away, leaning more into Jackson, and though heat tingles across my neck like Luke is staring, I don’t look back.