Chapter 10
Five Years Ago, San Diego—Ellery
Dante’s parents were awesome. Dante’s brother was awesome. That didn’t mean Ellery wasn’t thrilled when his mom and dad yawned after dinner and begged off another drink in the Gaslamp District in favor of heading back to their hotel.
She crowded into the rideshare between Dante and Casper, her heart thumping. She hadn’t had a moment alone with Dante all day.
And he was acting weird. Not that she had spent altogether that much time in his actual physical presence, but he was moody and distant.
At least Casper acknowledged her presence with something closer to gratitude and pleasure.
“Do you have any particular bar in mind?” Casper asked, his face open and guileless.
“Not really. I don’t spend a ton of time down here. Although any time I’ve ever been, I always wish I lived here instead of LA.”
She glanced at Dante, but his back was to her. Whatever. If he was going to ignore her, that was his issue. “Is this your first time in San Diego?” she asked Casper.
“Yeah. It’s a really cool city. Very laid back. People are surprisingly friendly. I don’t know if I could live here, though.”
“I know what you mean. I’ve been in Southern California now for almost six years and I still can’t deal with the constant sun.”
“You’re from where?”
Dante swiveled, the muscles in his arms brushing against her. “She’s from Milwaukee.”
Okay. At least he wanted to join the conversation instead of sulking. Ellery brightened her smile. Nothing like feeling stuck in some unknown family drama. “Yeah. Milwaukee. But my sister is at college in Florida, so my parents spend a lot of time down there.”
“Cool. Do you get along?”
“Yeah, we do. Samara is definitely different from me. She’s probably going to be a chemical engineer or something brilliant.” Ah, yes. The favored younger sister. Ellery felt the apology blush warm her cheeks.
Dante nudged her with his knee. “What you do is just as important. You create. That’s amazing. And I’m sure your parents are proud of you.”
Ellery bit her lip. Some things were too much to consider at once. Better to deflect. “So, what about you?” She glanced between Casper and Dante. “You two are, like—”
“Twins?” Casper grinned, a dimple appearing beside his lips. “Yeah. Fraternal. Dante didn’t tell you?”
Dante turned back to staring out the window, all sullen again.
Her inner self sighed. “No. He just said he had an older brother.”
“That’s because I am older. A whole twenty minutes, right, Dante?” Casper reached across her to shove Dante in a universally bro way.
“Not that you ever let me forget it.” Dante’s voice was tight and fierce. Not something she had ever expected. It occurred to her that despite the time, there was so much she didn’t know about him, about his life. The little snippets she’d caught on their text chain weren’t enough.
“What’s up with you today?” Casper voiced her own feelings. “Missing ship life already?” He leaned over Ellery, as if intending for their bodies to be too close in the back seat. “Or just missing the ship sex?”
Dante slashed him with a murderous look. Ellery’s heart raced as she glanced into the front seat where the driver was decidedly not looking at them all.
“Here,” the driver said, stopping the car abruptly. He tapped the sign hanging over the back of the front passenger seat, which read It don’t mean a thing if it ain’t 5 Stars.
Casper tapped the tip and rating buttons on his app, opened the door, and helped Ellery out. Good. She didn’t have any interest in hanging around for some family feud.
She climbed out of the car and glanced around the streets of the Gaslamp District.
Redbrick shops and clubs and bars, people milling around in the pedestrian-only zone.
She wrapped her arms around her chest, squeezing in the warmth.
She should have chosen a thicker jacket.
Who knew it would be cooler in San Diego than Los Angeles?
She heard the car take off, likely for its next fare. If she had to spend the evening with Dante and his brother fighting like toddlers, at least they could find some decent music here.
“Where do you want to go?” Casper placed his hands on his hips and looked up and down the street, his expression open and eager. “I could definitely use a drink.”
“Whatever.” Dante, in contrast, stood with hands in the pockets of his jeans, looking everywhere but at her.
She sighed, using her ears to guide her toward what was hopefully a decent concert.
Dante matched her pace, his gait more determined than willing. What was up with him? “Are you okay?” Ellery bit her lip and rubbed her palms against her arms.
“I’m fine. Everything’s fine.”
Which meant nothing was fine.
“So,” Casper said, in a clear attempt to lighten the mood. “Where are you staying, Ellery?”
She shrugged in response. The good music was getting louder, which seemed like an oasis in the desert of Dante’s conversation. “I don’t know. I figured I’d drive back to LA tonight. Beat the traffic.”
“Oh, no way! I can ask my parents if you can stay with us at the hotel.”
Dante scoffed so loudly it practically reverberated through Ellery’s bones.
Enough of this. She stopped in the middle of the street and whirled. “Do you want me to leave?”
He had the decency to look chagrined. “What?”
Casper stepped out of the line of fire and busied himself with his phone.
At least one of them was being mature. Ellery crossed her arms over her chest. “Do you want me to leave? You’ve barely said three words to me all day.
I thought you wanted me to come. But I’m not going to hang around where I’m not wanted.
I skipped out on overtime at the store for this because I thought you wanted to see me.
If I hit the 405 right now, I can be home and in my own bed in less than three hours.
So.” She jutted her hip to one side. “If you want to fight with you family, who flew here from Seattle to see you, then fine. No harm done. We’re friends, right? ”
Dante stared into the ground, like his eyesight could cause fractures in the space-time continuum. Good. Maybe they could go back to before that night at the bar when her life changed irrevocably.
Tears stung at the backs of Ellery’s eyes, but she didn’t know why. She didn’t have time to figure it out. “Fine. Good night. Casper, it was great meeting you.”
She stalked down the street, her vision blurry in the weird light from the combination of faux gas lamps and restaurants’ low lighting. This had been a giant mistake. A whirlwind of a mistake. Hurricane level five mistake.
“Ellery, wait!”
A warm hand slid around her arm, firm and comforting. She stopped, the soles of her sneakers squeaking against the pavement. She couldn’t look at him, wouldn’t look at him.
Even as her heart begged her to.
Who was she kidding? Her heart didn’t know what it wanted. They were friends. That was all. This was only the second time they’d ever met in person. Two years of texts and emails and the rare video chat made a friendship. A shared love of music.
Nothing else.
“El.” His voice was low but soft, like saying her name was the apology itself.
“That’s not an apology.” She bit the words as they grated on her palate.
“I know.” He exhaled a deep rumble. “I—I’m sorry, Ellery. You’re right. I haven’t been making it easy. I want you to stay. If you want to stay.”
She sniffed away the tears and turned to him with a flip of her hair. “Then what was all this? All this sullen, adolescent bullshit?”
He ran his hands through his hair. “I don’t know. Me and Casper…it’s just weird sometimes.” His face had changed since the last time she had seen him, grown sharper, more angular, more tanned. His cheeks were grazed with soft stubble. She raised a hand, tentative, even if she was never tentative.
“May I?” She thought she said it, but it could have just been the intention to speak. His gaze met hers, his hazel eyes warm. That might as well be an invitation.
She brushed the backs of her knuckles across the stubble on his cheeks. She felt the sharp intake of his breath as her skin met his. “You didn’t have this the last time I saw you.”
His cheek warmed beneath her hand. “I’ve been growing it out.”
“You look really good.” She left her palm there for an extra minute, reluctant to shorten the moment, then dropped her hand and stepped away.
Casper was standing several feet away, pretending not to watch them while engrossed in something on his phone.
“So what was this?” she asked.
Dante’s gaze fixed on her, which only served to make her nerves tingle.
“I’m sorry,” Dante repeated. “It’s probably ridiculous. I— I didn’t expect Casper to be here.”
“But he’s your brother. Your twin, by the way.” She shook her head. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me that.”
He toed the ground with the edge of his sneaker. “I know. I’ve just always been compared to Casper my whole life. He’s all gleeful mystery, and I’m…just me. My family’s always been supportive, but it’s—I don’t know. I didn’t like how the two of you were flirting.”
Ellery laughed, the relief flooding through her. It wasn’t that Dante didn’t want her there. He just misinterpreted the situation. “Flirting? Was the cruise ship secretly some cheesy movie set where people only talk in innuendo?”
The terse set of his shoulders lightened. A win was a win. “Not exactly.”
“Casper!” Ellery called. Clearly Dante needed reassurance. His brother raised his head from his phone. “Were we flirting?”
Casper’s eyes widened and his jaw stiffened, his gaze on Dante.
“Nope. No offense, Ellery, but no.” He stuffed his phone into his back pocket and yawned theatrically.
“I’ve got to go. I’m pretty tired. My rideshare will be here soon.
” He walked away from them, holding a hand in the air. “See you. Have fun.”
When Ellery turned back to Dante, he was shaking his head. “He’s not subtle.”