Chapter 20 #2
They held one another for a long moment, and Emmy let the satisfaction of knowing she had their support flood through her.
“I love you guys,” she murmured from the center of their embrace. “Sorry if I don’t tell you enough.”
“Oh, honey, we know. You don’t have to apologize,” her mother said, and pulled back to wipe her eyes. “And besides, your father
and I aren’t exactly exemplary models of expressing emotion.” A soggy laugh popped from her mouth.
“And yet here we are having a family cry,” Frank said, sniffling as he chuckled.
Emmy joined them, feeling her sore heart lift. “We should do this more.”
“What, cry?” Frank said.
“No. Talk about Josh,” she said, and wiped her nose with a napkin. “I miss him.”
Her parents leaned on each other and laced their hands together. “We miss him too,” her mom said in a thick voice.
Emmy let go of a big breath, feeling the permanent hole in her heart mend with a tiny patch. She wasn’t sure she was any closer to solving her problem, but talking with her parents had soothed an ache she’d been carrying for a long, long time. “What do you think he would tell me to do?” she asked.
“Josh?” her mom asked as she got up from her chair to tuck a reaching vine into a trellis. “Oh, he’d say go for the guy. He
was always a hopeless romantic.”
“Got that from his mother,” Frank said, and leaned over to peck Vera’s cheek.
The sight warmed Emmy’s heart and filled her with gratitude for inviting her brother’s memory into the conversation. She’d
talked about him—with Gabe, with Piper, now with her parents—more in the past few weeks than she had in years, and it felt
good. There would always be pain, of course, but Josh could brighten any darkness. She just had to be brave enough to let
him shine through.
“And you? What do you think?” Emmy asked her parents.
Her mother gave her a sincere look and crossed back over to her side of the table. She took her daughter’s hands in hers.
“Emmy, you are so smart and so driven. I know I push you to spend time focusing on other things, sometimes unfairly, but you’ve
worked so hard to make it to where you are in your career, and you deserve to keep moving up.” She paused and tucked Emmy’s
hair behind her ear. “But I’ve also never seen you as happy as you were in Mexico. He lights you up, sweetheart. And you deserve
to feel that glow.” She placed her warm palm on Emmy’s chest and softly smiled. “We can’t tell you what to do, but I know
you’ll follow your heart, and it’ll lead you to where you’re supposed to be.”
Emmy wished her heart would tell her what to do, but it wasn’t offering up any advice at the moment.
All it was doing was beating the same confused pattern it had been for the past three days, ever since they got the ultimatum email at work.
When Jacob had given Emmy an ultimatum, most of her thoughts centered on shock, and then regret for having invested in their relationship at all, but that decision came to her quickly.
He was easy to let go because they weren’t a good fit.
But Gabe... Gabe fit like no one else she’d ever known, and she worried if she gave him up, it would leave an intolerable void.
“Come on,” her mom said, and waved her arm. “Why don’t you help me in the garden; it always helps clear my mind.”
Emmy decided to take her up on the offer. The morning was already ripening into a warm day. She borrowed one of her mom’s
giant hats, slathered herself in sunscreen, and put on a pair of gloves. By the time they broke for a late lunch, Emmy was
damp with sweat and covered in dirt. But her mind was much clearer. The simplicity of digging and pruning and working the
soil under her mother’s instruction helped untangle the thoughts in her head. She could see clearly, and she knew what she
wanted.
She wandered over to the patio table to stand in the shade of the umbrella and gulp a bottle of water. Her phone had a new
message from Axe Murderer waiting for her.
Ready to talk?
He’d sent it a while ago, but she immediately wrote him back.
Yes, and we should do it in person. I need to head home and shower first. I’m covered in dirt.
I am intrigued.
Don’t be. I was gardening with my mom.
Ah. Tell Frank and Vera hi for me.
I will. What have you been doing?
Believe it or not, I’ve been with my parents too.
Oh?
Yes. Turns out they are in fact proud of me and don’t blame me for blowing my shot all those years ago.
Of course they are, and of course they don’t.
It was nice to hear them say it. I came over to talk to them about our situation, and a lot of things that needed to be said
came up.
Her heart swelled with warmth.
I’m happy to hear that.
So, where are we meeting?
Emmy mulled her response. She was eager too, but also nervous. She knew enough about texting now to know things said through
screens weren’t always the same as in person. Even if it seemed like they were on the same page, she needed to see him to
know where they stood.
Beach?
Perfect. Which one?
Sunset?
Are you asking me to meet you at sunset or at Sunset beach?
How about both?
This is very dramatic, Bird Girl.
You’re the Axe Murderer. I thought you’d love a dramatic moment.
Fair. Okay. I’ll see you there.
See you.
Sunset Cliffs Natural Park stretched across the western bend of Point Loma. On a weekend in summer, it was a hot spot for
locals and tourists alike. It was also less beach and more rugged coastline with rocky cliffs dropping straight into the water,
but, as the name implied, offered a killer view of the sunset.
Emmy parked and walked out along the dirt path, looking for Gabe. The sun had started its final descent, melting the horizon
into a hazy orange bar between blue sky and even bluer water. Waves rolled to shore and crashed off the rocks, sending a dramatic
spray up every so often. The wind cut through her thin hoodie and whipped her hair around. The raw nature of it all was at
once refreshing and humbling.
She spotted the familiar wave of Gabe’s hair, the frame of his shoulders where he stood out near one of the cliffs.
He wore Chucks and jeans and a windbreaker that seemed like a better idea than her hoodie given she’d already wrapped her arms around herself for warmth.
She approached him feeling equal parts nervous and calm.
She knew what she wanted, and she hoped they were on the same page.
She tapped his shoulder when she came up behind him. “Hey,” she greeted.
He turned, and the sinking sun bathed him in a warm glow like that morning they woke together in Mexico. “Hey.”
They stood there for a charged moment, and Emmy tried to read his face.
Instead of speaking, he reached out and pulled her mouth to meet his. The kiss was warm and soft and sent her blood looping
through her body. It ached with a longing she couldn’t place, either a reunion or a goodbye.
She pulled back and touched her forehead to his. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
Gabe softly shook his head. “You first.”
Emmy looked deeply into his eyes and saw the same nerves she felt. The uncertainty over what she would say. But one of them
had to jump first. She took a breath and found her footing then let herself fly.
“I think I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, and I want to see where this goes.”
The words were out, and with them, an enormous weight lifted. She’d thought about it all night, all morning while gardening—truly
since the night they first slept together in Mexico. There was no turning back for her after that, and it felt good to finally
tell him.
She waited for him to respond, feeling her heart beat in every inch of her body.
He let out a huge sigh of relief. “I thought you might pick the job, but I’m so glad to hear you say that, because I feel
the same.”
She nearly sagged with her own relief; she had thought he might pick the job too. “You do?”
“I do. I wanted that job, but I want you more, Emmy. I’ve wanted you for a long time.
The truth is, I’ve been into you for years, but you never seemed interested, so I kept my distance.
You are so smart and so... stubborn. And the way you look in computer glasses should be illegal.
” He shot her a little grin that made her blush.
“You challenge me at work and make me better at what I do. And you are remarkably kind and patient; I don’t know how you put up with me most of the time, but I’m thankful that you do.
Honestly, I would trade anything to have a shot at being with you.
I’ve never been able to talk to anyone the way I can talk to you.
It’s so effortless. And I’m profoundly thankful the connection is even stronger in person.
” He let out a sweet, embarrassed laugh.
“When I started texting this random girl one day because of a fake number, and she turned out to be my dream girl, who then turned out to be you, when the shock wore off, I thought I’d won the fucking lottery.
I want to see where this goes more than I’ve ever wanted anything. ”
Emmy laughed and only then noticed that her cheeks were wet with tears. Gabe wiped them with his thumbs and then kissed her
again. This time she wrapped her arms around him, and he lifted her off the ground. It was their deepest kiss yet. Full of
truth and honesty and feelings so big Emmy feared she might explode. They kissed for what might have been an indecent amount
of time in public, but perhaps not given they were standing in a place famed for marriage proposals and sunset kissing selfies.
When he set her back down, she stumbled a little. She gripped his arms and shivered against the wind that felt almost icy
compared to the warmth of his body. She was nearly drunk with relief, with happiness, with a bittersweet acceptance of what
she was giving up for what she was gaining. She smoothed her hands over his chest and felt his heart beating inside.