Chapter Eleven
Maci woke up the next morning in Chance’s guest room feeling much better. Her head still hurt, but not as bad as it had. Plus, she didn’t have to worry about going undercover as Stella anymore.
Most importantly, she didn’t have to pretend like she wasn’t pregnant. It was okay if she got sick, okay if she needed to sit down, okay to be completely overwhelmed. She didn’t have to hide it.
Chance had taken the news much better than she’d thought he would. She definitely hadn’t expected him to want to stay with her. If she could’ve thought of a reason to tell him why she shouldn’t go back to her apartment, she would’ve done it.
She wasn’t embarrassed by it, per se. But compared to his place, hers was pretty run-down. Everything was clean, but secondhand. The place fairly screamed that Maci was barely on her feet financially.
And then Evelyn being there... Maci rubbed her eyes. It could’ve gone much worse than it had. Once she’d gotten her mom back to the bedroom, she’d offered her all the cash she had on hand to leave.
Long-term, it wasn’t the best way to deal with Evelyn. But Maci hadn’t been thinking long-term. She’d just wanted Evelyn out before she revealed all Maci’s sordid secrets—or the few she was sober enough to remember.
At least Evelyn wouldn’t be showing up here. That was the most immediate reason why Maci had agreed to stay at Chance’s house when he offered.
She’d slept most of the day, so there hadn’t been much chance for them to talk. She knew he must have questions. She was less sure whether she had answers for any of them.
When they ate dinner across from each other, it was mostly silent. Chance’s life had changed practically overnight, and she wanted to give him time to digest everything. He deserved a second to breathe. Truthfully, she wanted the time too.
She wouldn’t avoid the big conversations forever. She just needed a second to get her bearings.
When Chance sat down on the same couch she’d curled up on after dinner, Maci knew her time was up.
“We should talk—” he started, only to be interrupted by a knock on the door. Frowning, he turned to her. “Were you expecting anyone?”
“Nope.” Especially not here.
She stayed where she was as Chance headed toward the door, grabbing his weapon from the gun safe as he did. She heard him let out a sigh.
“Open the door, Chance! We want to see your baby mama.” Claire’s voice was muffled through the front door, but Maci could still hear her friend’s cheerful pep.
“Incoming,” Chance muttered, then opened the door.
It wasn’t just Claire, Luke’s wife. It was also Brax’s wife, Tessa, and Weston’s fiancée, Kayleigh.
“We wanted to come over and see how Maci was doing,” Kayleigh said. “You know, have some girl time.”
“Right.” Chance met eyes with Maci from behind the women, eyebrow raised. He was making sure she was okay with company. She knew without a doubt that if she said she wasn’t ready, he’d kick the girls out, even if it meant taking flak from his brothers for it.
His protectiveness did something to Maci. She’d never had someone care about her like that. She gave him a nod, letting him know it was okay. She knew her friends had questions, and she owed them a face-to-face talk.
He followed the women as they gathered around Maci. “Can I get you all something to drink?”
Maci hid her smile behind the blanket. Despite not having them their whole lives, Sheila Patterson had raised her boys right. The impeccable, gentlemanly manners proved it.
“No, no. We’re fine.” Tessa pointed at Maci. “We just want to talk to this one.”
He nodded. “I’ll go back to the other room and call the office. I’ll get an update on what’s been happening.”
Maci knew he’d already done that today, but appreciated him giving them time alone. “Thank you.”
As the others got comfortable, Chance disappeared into the kitchen again. When he came back, he dropped a sleeve of crackers, some ginger ale and a trashcan in arm’s reach of Maci. When she arched an eyebrow, he grimaced. “In case you start feeling sick. Need anything else?”
Well, swoon.
Aware of everyone watching them, Maci shook her head and thanked him. Chance looked her over again and leaned down to press a kiss to her forehead. “Yell if these three get out of hand.”
As soon as the home office door shut behind him, all three friends started talking at the same time.
Claire let out a sigh. “I hope Luke acts like that when I eventually get pregnant.”
“That was the most romantic thing I’ve ever seen.” Kayleigh fanned herself.
Tessa crossed her arms over her chest. “So, you and Chance? You’re a sneaky one, I’ll give you that.”
Claire nodded. “We all knew you two needed to get together, but we had no idea you already had .”
Maci let out a sigh. “We were casually seeing each other a while ago.”
It wasn’t quite the truth, but it wasn’t a lie either. They had been casual, but their time had mostly been spent wrapped up in one another.
“And you aren’t anymore?” Kayleigh asked.
“I broke it off.” Even that made her cringe. She hadn’t broken it off, she’d ghosted him as much as she could with them working together. Suddenly, the half-truth didn’t feel right in her mouth. “It was just sex.”
“Not anymore,” Claire quipped, grunting when Tessa nudged her in the shin. “So, why’d you break up?”
“I’m not the type of person someone like Chance should settle down with.”
Kayleigh frowned. “Why not?”
Maci’s past rushed through her mind, fragments of moments she barely remembered. Ratty mattresses and worn-down people. Broken bottles and dark, desolate places. Bad decisions that haunted her. Most days she used them as fuel to make a better life for herself, but sometimes they served as reminders of how far she could fall.
But her friends didn’t know about her past either. “Let’s just say that my history doesn’t make me a good candidate for someone like Chance for a serious and long-term relationship.”
“Who cares about your history?” Tessa frowned. “We’ve all got a past. All that matters is right now. You’re a good person, Maci Ford. You’re hardworking and kind and loyal to a fault. Anyone would be lucky to have you, especially Chance.”
She knew Tessa was just being a good friend, but every part of Maci disagreed. Chance needed someone better at his side. Someone stronger and with far less baggage. Maci could fill an entire closet with hers.
“Did Chance demand long-term and serious?” Claire asked.
“No, but...” Maci couldn’t finish. She’d cut Chance out of her personal life before he could even get close to that point.
“No, but you were afraid he’d go there,” Kayleigh guessed.
Maci nodded. She’d intentionally tried not to dream of a future with him, but every time they gave in to their off-the-charts chemistry it became harder. She knew if he’d started talking about commitments, she’d never have the strength to deny them both.
Claire shook her head. “So, it’s not that you’re not with him because you don’t have feelings for him. And I already know he has feelings for you.”
Maci definitely had feelings for Chance Patterson. “It’s complicated, you guys.”
“It always is.” All three women said it at the same time, then laughed.
“Can’t be any more complicated than Brax and I,” Tessa said. “He thought I was Walker’s nanny, not his mother.”
Claire shrugged. “Luke wasn’t sure if I was a murderer at first.”
Kayleigh grinned. “I thought Weston was the groundskeeper, not my bodyguard.”
Maci couldn’t help but smile herself. “I guess it is always complicated.”
“So, what are you going to do?” Tessa asked.
“About what?”
Claire squeezed her hand. “About the baby, about Chance, about everything. You have the opportunity to point things in the direction you want them to go.”
“Chance and I are going to be coparents and maybe friends. That’s it.” Even if she was the one who had to draw the line between them. Chance was always protecting her, and this was her chance to protect him for once.
“Uh-huh,” Tessa said. “Do you still want to be with him?”
Yes. It wasn’t even a question. Maci wanted everything with him, she just wasn’t sure that she could have it. So, once again, she took the coward’s way out. “I don’t know.”
Kayleigh called her on it, eyebrow raised. “Yes, you do. You just don’t want to admit it.”
“I already said—”
“We know.” Kayleigh rolled her eyes. “You’re not a good fit. You’ll drag him down. Blah, blah, blah. Have you ever asked Chance what he wants?”
Tessa moved to sit on the coffee table directly in front of Maci, grabbing her hands tightly. “Instead of trying to protect him, why don’t you let him make his own choices? It’s what you would want if the roles were reversed.”
She winced. “But he doesn’t know—”
“Then tell him.” Kayleigh squished onto the table with Tessa, setting a hand on Maci’s knee.
Claire slipped an arm through Maci’s and suddenly they were all connected. “Chance is a big boy who knows how to weigh risk and rewards. He’s capable of choosing whether he stays or goes and in what capacity he wants to be in your life, but it’s unfair of you to take that choice from him.”
“I’m scared. I don’t want to hurt him.”
“You already have,” Claire said softly, grimacing when Maci flinched. “I don’t say it to make you feel bad, but you have to know. Pushing him away when anyone can see that he wants to be closer is hurting him. Especially when he has no idea what he’s done wrong.”
“He hasn’t done anything wrong.”
“So, tell him that. Talk to him. It’s okay to be scared, but you two are going to have to find a way to coexist for the rest of your lives. Wouldn’t it be better to do it with a clean slate?”
Maci didn’t even have to think about it. The girls were right. Chance deserved to make his own decisions, but how could she tell him everything he needed to know? How could she give him the reason he needed to walk away from her?
And how would she survive once he did?
“You don’t have to do it right now, but just think about it. Okay?” Tessa pulled Maci off the couch and into a hug. “We’re here for you.”
“Anytime, anywhere,” Claire added, snuggling into Maci’s back.
“Whatever you need.” Kayleigh slid an arm around her waist.
Wrapped in her friends’ arms, she heaved a deep breath for the first time since she found out she was pregnant. Tessa, Claire and Kayleigh—because of their connection to the Patterson brothers—had become pillars of her life and the best friends she’d ever had.
They were just pulling away when Chance came out of his office. “I can come back if you need more time.”
“Actually, we’re heading out.” Tessa pulled Maci back into a hug, whispering, “Let him make his own choices.”
After the others said goodbye too, she ushered them out the door.
Chance closed the door behind them, but didn’t move. He stood by the entryway and stared at Maci. Something in the way he watched her made Maci feel almost vulnerable, and she wrapped an arm around herself as if the added barrier would help.
“What are you doing?” she finally asked.
“Looking at you.”
Uncomfortable under his gaze, she fell back to her default snark. “Obviously. Why are you doing it?”
“Because you’re beautiful.”
Maci opened her mouth, but nothing came out. What was she supposed to say to that? The air thickened around them as the silence grew, and suddenly it was too much.
“I’m sorry,” she blurted.
Chance’s brows lowered, shadowing his eyes. “For what?”
“I should have told you about the baby. I should have told you—” She cut herself off. It wasn’t the time to invite her demons into the conversation. Not yet. They’d have to talk about them eventually, but that was a problem for future Maci.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” His tone held no malice.
She walked back into the living room and plopped back onto the couch and looked down at her lap, twisting her fingers over and over. Finally, she decided that if they were going to have a chance at coparenting— or more —she had to be honest with him. They’d never be able to be anything if she kept hiding the truth. Baby steps.
“I was scared.”
“Oh, honey.” Just like that, he was kneeling at her feet, big hands cradling her face. “What were you scared of?”
Nothing. Everything.
She wanted to tell him, but she knew she couldn’t. He didn’t need to see how big of a mess she was. Eventually it would be clear, but for now, she wanted him to never stop looking at her the way he did. Like he cherished her. Like he understood her. Like he wanted to know every thought she ever had.
As if he could read her mind, he leaned in so close that their breath mingled. “You don’t have to tell me right now. There’s no rush.” He pressed a soft kiss to her lips, the barely-there touch making them tingle. “Keep your secrets for now, Maci Ford. I’m not going anywhere.”
Maci’s chest ached at the tenderness in his voice and the way he held her. As she reached for him, pulling his face to hers, she knew that she was already gone. There was no avoiding the path back to each other that faith had put them on.
She wasn’t optimistic enough to believe they’d have forever, but for now, she’d enjoy having Chance at her side again.
They kissed slowly, eventually moving to Chance’s room where they relearned each other’s bodies. Every kiss, every touch, stoked the need that months of distance had created. Maci’s skin burned, aching for more with every sweep of his hands, and when they came together again, the look on Chance’s face was like nothing else.
His eyes spoke his truth in waves of reverence and awe. The way he touched her, the way they moved together, felt a little like worship.
When they were spent, Chance curled his body around hers with his hand resting protectively on her stomach, his lips pressed softly to the nape of her neck. The steady counts of his breathing lulled her to sleep, and though she told herself not to fall for the dream, for the first time since she’d run from him, Maci felt at peace again.