Do Overs
ASHA
I handed off my badge looking behind me to see exactly where Ori was.
He’d been stopped by a colleague and instead of having me sit and wait for him he told me to go ahead.
I wasn’t exactly comfortable here without him but he said that Alec would be walking down to meet us.
The building was almost like a regular office building but once you walked in you knew that things were different because of the level of security.
The badge I had been given was the visitor’s pass that they’d taken the first day I’d gotten here and I’d gotten used to carrying it around for the last few weeks.
Today was the first time that we’d driven to work together and the act of near domesticity was almost unnerving.
We’d both sensed that something had shifted yet again.
Since he’d moved in Ori and I had fallen into a routine that would involve our normal actions simply done together.
But this morning changed. A conversation over coffee and glances that I could feel him giving me as I moved about the bathroom.
It had been strange sharing a bed with a person who didn’t seem to want this situation.
I told myself it was resignation, his way of accepting his fate and trying to get used to a new normal, but it didn’t feel that way anymore.
We’d woken up closer to one another. Physically.
But that seemed to do something to our mental as well.
Life felt settled but that acknowledgement made me feel unsettled.
And now walking into work together chatting as though everything was fine had my head spinning.
“Dr. Avery!”
I retrieved the visitor’s badge from the security officer as I walked through the metal detectors and I scanned the massive space to see who’d called my name. It didn’t sound like Alec but I might’ve been wrong.
“Over here.”
I looked around until my eyes landed on a person I’d met the first time I’d been in the office. I knew that he and Ori weren’t on the best terms so I wondered what it was he wanted.
“Good morning, Agent…” I couldn’t recall his name so I hoped he’d fill in the blank.
He came to a stop in front of me his face looking baffled at my forgetting him. His face was that of a normal, nondescript white American man so it wasn’t as though he was someone striking enough to remember.
“Anderson. Agent Anderson.”
I nodded despite not really caring about his name, since I wouldn’t bother to remember it. “Right. Is there something you needed?”
“I wanted to speak to you about the Rawlins case.”
I looked around the area to see where Ori was and to figure out why there was a need for him to discuss any of that with me.
“I’m not sure that we’re supposed to be talking about it. Especially not out in the open like this.” I kept my bag gripped in my hands in front of me as a barrier. He gave me the creeps and I wished he would stop coming to speak to me.
“You can come up to my office and we can discuss it there.”
My danger radar went off as my hand started to tingle and the desire to make him bleed came over me.
“No, thank you.”
“Is this about Nakoa? I’m trying to understand why you think you would be better off working with him than with me.” He had some type of problem with Ori and he had no issue with showing me he didn’t fuck with him.
“You don’t need to understand a choice that came down from those above your pay grade.” A slight one he didn’t miss, by the way his eyes flickered over my face and down my frame.
“He’s not above my pay grade—”
“I’m speaking of Agent Cochran. It’s my understanding that she and the rest of your superiors made the call. I wasn’t speaking of Agent Nakoa.”
“He can’t do shit for you when it comes to working with the bureau again.”
I had to refrain from laughing in his face. It was nothing but arrogance that had him assuming people would fall over themselves to work with this department. “Who said I wanted to?”
He glanced around checking to see if anyone was observing this show of power he was performing for me.
“I’m just saying if that’s your aim then working with me would be the best way to go.
The idea that you are on this case and don’t want to gain something from it is just you being dishonest with yourself. ”
“You think so?”
“Yes. Everyone wants something in this world. Nakoa can’t give that to you.
He’s on his way out. This is his last case so giving you this chance to make him look good one last time is their way of trying to make his record perfect before he walks out the door.
Now I am dedicated to this organization.
Won’t quit while I’m in the middle of my career and definitely don’t mind helping someone else if that means they’d done their part to help me succeed.
” His voice had lowered and I knew he was weak by the way he wasn’t just as loud about his attempt to coerce me to go against the directives I’d been given.
“Help you? Isn’t this YOUR JOB?” I didn’t hide the disgust on my face, something he noted and eased the tension in his face.
“Everyone helps everyone. And when you need to succeed then the best thing to do is to use your resources.”
“And you think that’s what I am to you? A resource?” My tone was flat and I was irritated by the implication that I was a tool in his arsenal.
He made the mistake of taking a step closer to me, and that made my ire increase. “There could be more—”
Agent Anderson was snatched back by his collar unceremoniously before he could speak another word. The sheer force used meant that he was lifted off his feet and Ori tossed him a few feet away as he whined in protest.
When Ori turned toward me his eyes were wild, flashing angrily before he schooled his features. The look was pure fire and I could see it in his eyes. They turned smoldering when he looked at me but the flames couldn’t be missed.
“You ready to head upstairs?”
Ori’s hand was on the small of my back ushering me away from the chaos he’d caused. He seemed unbothered by the madness behind him and didn’t acknowledge what he’d just done.
“Yes.”
We had an unspoken agreement not to speak on what had gone on but I could tell he felt some kind of way about it.
Speaking on it wasn’t going to happen within the confines of this elevator and might not while we were within these walls.
He stood closer to me, protectively, silently brooding while I attempted to maneuver through what had happened and what was coming.
All of this was heavy: dealing with death and needing to perform in the capacity they’d brought me on while also being aggravated by my interaction with Agent Anderson.
We stepped off the elevator as in step as we could be with the height difference before we entered the room together.
Alec immediately looked up like he could sense something was going on.
“You good?”
His words were directed to Ori and I knew they were doing some silent speaking thing they’d honed since they’d been partners so I wasn’t going to interrupt.
Instead, I moved from next to Ori and took my seat at the table.
Alec nodded before Ori wordlessly walked out of the room without saying anything else.
I waited on Alec to say something but he just stood by the door with his eyes trained on the hallway.
“What is going on?”
“Nothing. Ori just needed to speak to Cochran real fast.”
He was good but the ease in which he’d come up with that excuse without Ori having said a word meant it was complete bullshit.
“I know you’re lying but can you promise he’s not going to do anything crazy?”
“No, because I don’t know what your definition of crazy is.” He turned from the door with a smile meant to soothe my nerves but it made me hyperaware that Ori was in fact about to do something crazy.
I stood back up intending to go after him but Alec was already shaking his head.
“You aren’t going to stop me.”
“As much as I would hate to, since I want to be nosy as well, I’d have to.”
I weighed his words thinking about how Ori would react if I saw him behaving badly. I knew that he wouldn’t want me to see him being out of control but I didn’t want him to get in trouble over Anderson.
The musing was all for naught since Ori strode back into the room a second later. I waited for him to explain his absence but he just gave me a nod before he unbuttoned his blazer and sat down to get to work like nothing happened.
When he began to act as if he had nothing else to say I had to speak up.
“Are we going to ignore the elephant in the room?” I glanced between the two of them but Alec was the only one to acknowledge I’d even spoken. And that acknowledgment was a laugh and a playful look to Ori like this shit is all on you.
Another few minutes passed as I stared a hole into the top of his head.
He had it lowered slightly as he focused on whatever it was he was reading.
When he finally tired of the pressure he scowled at me from his lowered lids before giving me a gruff response.
“Nothing to acknowledge; everything is handled. Let’s get back to work. ”
ORI
“I’m shocked you actually came to see me.”
Those were the words that greeted me as I slid into the booth at one of our family’s restaurants. I wasn’t going to come initially but I didn’t want her to think she’d damaged me. Even though she had. She wasn’t going to be privy to the inner workings of my mind. Not yet. Probably never.
I had a busy day and enough on my mind after the bullshit that Anderson pulled this morning. Alec was following a lead and Asha needed to get back to George Washington for a meeting this afternoon, which freed me up to take this lunch meeting.
“You made it seem like it was necessary.”