Chapter 35
“What? That starved for entertainment that you spy on other people’s private business, huh boys?” I asked loudly when we got closer to the cabin.
“We couldn’t help it, you two put on a good show!” Dale called. Several men whistled in agreement.
“Besides,” added Little John, “that was the first time we’ve seen you kiss anyone and not club them over the head immediately after! We wanted to make sure you weren’t about to be taken advantage of!”
Baron looked at me curiously. “How often have you clubbed someone you kissed over the head?”
I refused to answer the question. And, technically, I hadn’t clubbed any of them.
The moment we walked in, the men crowded around Baron, either slapping him on the shoulder and congratulating him for being the first man ever to hold my attention, or else loudly threatening him never to harm me.
“He’s the only one not terrified of her,” Dale laughed.
“Well, he better be terrified of what we will do to him if he ever breaks her heart.”
“Don’t be jealous, Baron. She never kissed any of the others like that before.”
“Best keep that one happy. I’ve seen what she can do when she’s mad.”
“I could tell what you were thinking out there, boy, and you’d better keep those thoughts under control, or you’ll have us to deal with. You probably need to chat with Friar Tuck as it is.”
“Aw, leave him alone, Little John. He’s a red-blooded male like the rest of us.”
“But this is our Laurel we’re talking about! He can’t think those types of thoughts about our girl.”
“I’m right here,” I said loudly. “I have a say in this, too.” But everyone ignored me.
Baron, at a complete loss for what to do, shifted from foot to foot, his hands awkwardly bouncing against his legs.
He bobbed his head at the men’s teasing grins and sometimes attempted a stiff smile in return, but mostly defaulted to a guilty, overly respectful nod.
His complexion remained a deep, embarrassed shade of crimson.
Father stood off to the side, arms folded and foot tapping in exaggerated impatience as he waited for the men to finish fussing over Baron.
Finally, the hubbub subsided, and Father approached. I had no idea what to expect. Was Father going to pull out his longbow and shoot Baron for kissing me? Would he give him a firm talking to in front of everyone? Punch him?
Father stared hard at Baron. Though Baron was significantly larger than Father, he looked nervous. “It seems that you’re interested in my daughter,” Father said.
“Yes, sir.”
“You may get to be his real father figure sooner than you thought, Robin!” One of the men called out.
“You had her chained to you for months,” Father continued.
Baron swallowed hard. “Yes, sir.”
Father cracked his knuckles. “Did you make her do any of that when she was chained to you?”
“No!” I interjected hastily. It would be too much bother to explain that it was because of the only other time we’d kissed that the chains were taken away. And that I’d been the instigator in that circumstance.
But Baron was too honest to lie. “Well, actually, yes, but just once.” Then he hastily added, “And I didn’t force her!” He briefly told the story, with Father stopping him several times to clarify details until he was sure that nothing more than what we said had happened.
I glanced behind us and saw that all the men were seated on the floor in a cluster, an eager audience, watching the dialogue bounce back and forth between Baron and Father as if they were at a badminton tournament.
Father swiveled to look at me. “So, you started it the first time?”
Feeling defiant, I boldly squared my shoulders. “Yes. Yes, I did.”
“Like you did with the pimply kid when I first found you?”
“Ah, no. I mean yes, but no.” I fidgeted nervously and avoided looking at Baron.
Suddenly, I felt that briefly kissing Sneeds in order to escape had somehow been unfaithful on my part.
My palms felt sweaty and I felt distinctly hot under the collar.
I inhaled deeply. “Yes, I started it both of those times, but I was just distracting Sneeds. I didn’t actually want to kiss him.
I had, um, different reasons with Baron. ”
I could have fried an egg on Baron’s face.
Dale had unearthed a large bowl of grapes from somewhere, and the men were passing the bowl back and forth amongst themselves, popping the fruit into their mouths as they watched the scene play out before them with rapt attention.
James leaned over to whisper something to Will Scarlet, and they both sniggered, holding their hands up to their mouths.
“Oh, I think we all know the reason!” piped up Will Stutely. “It was pretty obvious!” I could have died of embarrassment on the spot.
I wanted to shoo all of the men away, but with this dramatic of a spectacle happening right in front of their eyes, I knew they would stoutly refuse if I tried.
Instead, I frowned and shook my head at the men.
Honestly. Sometimes they acted so immature, but they were not in the least bit abashed.
Will Scarlet wiggled his eyebrows and gave me another enthusiastic thumbs-up before he popped another grape into his mouth and turned his attention back to the exchange.
I cleared my throat. “I think we all know the reason. Everyone saw, didn’t they?” I’d meant the last part to be a hint for them to be ashamed of spying on us, but there was no shame to be found in any of the keen onlookers.
“She looooooves him!” snickered one of the men behind me, followed by an outbreak of giggling. I held my head high in dignified silence.
“Humor me,” Father said, staring me down. I couldn’t tell if he was playing dumb, messing with me, or actually leading an interrogation. A pox upon Dale for giving Father acting lessons!
“What do you want me to say?” I demanded. “Baron’s certainly better-looking than any of the rest of you slobs, and when I’m with him I—I mean, he’s…well… Well, I just wanted to kiss him, okay? And I’m not sorry I did.”
Our audience gave an “Ooooooooh” in perfect unison. I rolled my eyes. It wasn’t a crime for me to be attracted to someone, regardless of what this self-appointed jury thought. They didn’t have to make such a big deal out of it.
“I see,” said Father slowly. Baron’s ears were steadily turning a deep purple color underneath his tan. I was sure that my face was even more flushed than his and was surprised that I hadn’t already burst into flames.
“And Laurel, you said that this Baron tracked you down and bested you in combat three times?” Father asked.
I squirmed uncomfortably. I hated admitting I had lost. Baron stepped in and said that he didn’t feel like the first time should count since my legs had been completely numb from crouching all night in a tree, and he described what had happened.
I expected Father to dismiss this detail and was therefore unsurprised when he waved away the comment.
“You caught her unprepared. You bested her. Circumstances don’t matter. Tell me what happened the most recent time.”
Father was flexing his fingers and tapping his foot very rapidly as Baron told his story. It looked like he was just itching to place his hands around Baron’s neck and begin squeezing the life out of him. I was apprehensive; I hadn’t seen Father agitated like this before.
“Well, you two leave me no other choice,” Father said in an angry tone, arms crossed tightly across his chest. “I have no other option than to”—he drew a deep, dramatic breath—“formally extend an offer to Baron to join our band of Merry Men.” He paused again for dramatic effect, then broke out into a wide smile. “Congratulations, young man.”
The men seated behind us burst out cheering. I was still confused, and I could tell Baron was baffled as well. “What?” Baron blurted out, completely lost.
Father laughed. “Oh, you should have seen your faces. I really had you going there! Now, I do need to let you know, because of the special circumstances here, you will be on probation for a year. But pending your adherence to our rules, you’ll be formally inducted after that.”
“Wait a second!” I said loudly. “I thought you were about to get after him for making a move!”
“Please,” Father said, utterly unconcerned. “You’re an adult, and you can do what you want. Besides, if he ever tried anything you didn’t want, you would have him laid out cold before he could say Jack Robinson!”
“That’s true,” Baron agreed, clearly relieved he wasn’t about to get strangled. He then proceeded to tell the story of how I’d flung him clean over my shoulder and blacked his eye the second time he’d tracked me down. The men all roared with laughter at this.
“You don’t have any concerns that he’s the sheriff’s son?” I asked, bewildered.
Father shrugged. “Your mother was Prince John’s cousin. It’s our choices, not our ancestry, that determine who we are.”
“Hear, hear!” chorused several of the men just as Sam and Tildy arrived back from market.
“What’s goin’ on ’ere? What’s goin’ on?” Sam asked as he stepped inside. “What’s all this commotion about in ’ere?”
Little John recapped the story to them, and Sam’s mouth dropped.
“That big bear bloke there was kissin’ Robin ’ood’s daughter?
Poor chap—meanin’ no disrespect, miss, but that’s a right dangerous thing for ’im to be doin’!
I seen what you can do wif vem knives ye keep in your belt, and if I were ’im I’d be scared spitless that I’d end up wif no lips or summat if I tried anyfink like that. ”
The men all hooted at this and told Sam that he was right to think it. Tildy patted my hand in a motherly way and loudly told me she hoped we would have many children, which caused me even more embarrassment than Father and all his men catching us kissing.