49. Chapter Forty-Nine
Chapter Forty-Nine
T he last morsels of Elias's raspberry tart dissolve on my tongue, leaving behind a sweet memory of summer berries and buttery crust. I set my fork down on the empty plate with a soft clink that seems to signal the end of our meal. Around the table, four pairs of eyes flicker toward me, each holding a different shade of the same affection that still feels foreign against my skin—like a sweater borrowed from someone else, comfortable but not quite mine.
"That," Soren declares, breaking the momentary silence, "was possibly the best tart I've ever had. And I'm saying that knowing it will go to Elias's head."
Elias beams, his face lit by the soft golden glow of the pendant light hanging above us. "Thank you. I used those wild blackberries that grow near the creek. They're smaller but more flavorful than the cultivated ones."
"The crust was perfect," I offer, still tasting the buttery flakes on my lips. "Exactly the right amount of sweetness to balance the tartness of the berries."
My comment earns me a look from Elias that's so full of gratitude you'd think I'd offered him the moon rather than simple praise. I'm still not used to how openly they express their emotions here, how a casual compliment can be received like a precious gift.
"So," Finn says, leaning back in his chair, his broad shoulders relaxing as he stretches slightly. "What's the plan for the rest of the evening?"
"Movie night," Lucian suggests at the exact moment Soren exclaims, "Game night!" They exchange a look across the table, Lucian's eyebrow arching in that subtle way that somehow speaks volumes, while Soren's expression turns comically affronted.
"Movies are passive," Soren argues, waving his hands with theatrical emphasis. "We've just had this amazing meal, this connection—" he gestures around the table, "—and you want to stare at a screen? Where's the interaction? The bonding experience?"
Lucian's mouth quirks at one corner. "Some of us have been interacting all day, Soren. Perhaps a quiet activity would be a nice change."
"Quiet?" Soren scoffs, pressing a hand to his chest in mock horror. "With Lydia here? Our first proper group date night? We can't waste it on just sitting around!"
My cheeks warm at being the center of his argument, though I'm not sure if I should be flattered or embarrassed. Finn notices my discomfort and gently redirects.
"What would you prefer, Lydia?" he asks, his green eyes kind and attentive. "Movies or games?"
All eyes turn to me again, and I resist the urge to shrink into my chair. This is what they do, I remind myself. They ask opinions. They care about preferences. It's still jarring after years of having my thoughts dismissed or ignored.
"I..." I hesitate, weighing both options. "I haven't really done either in a while."
"All the more reason to choose games," Soren jumps in, undeterred. "Active participation. Creating memories. Laughing together."
"All the more reason for a movie," Lucian counters smoothly. "Ease back into social activities. No pressure to perform."
Elias, who has been quietly observing the debate with amusement dancing in his hazel eyes, finally joins in. "Both have their merits," he says diplomatically. "A movie allows us to relax together, maybe cuddle a bit." His eyes flick to me and away, as if checking whether the suggestion might make me uncomfortable. "Games let us interact more directly, learn more about each other."
"Exactly!" Soren latches onto the part of Elias's response that supports his position. "Lucian just wants a movie because he knows I'll crush him at Monopoly."
Lucian snorts, the sound so unexpected from his usually composed demeanor that I can't help but smile. "The last time we played Monopoly, you flipped the board when Finn bought Boardwalk."
"That was one time," Soren protests, but his eyes gleam with mischief. "And I maintain that Finn cheated."
"How does one cheat at rolling dice?" Finn asks dryly, though his lips twitch with the effort of suppressing a smile.
"I don't know, but he found a way," Soren insists, pointing an accusing finger at Finn, who merely shrugs, unperturbed by the allegation.
I watch their banter bounce back and forth, a tennis match of teasing affection. There's something mesmerizing about it, this easy way they have with each other. No barbed edges, no hidden agendas, just the comfortable ribbing of people who know each other's quirks and love them anyway.
"What about a card game?" I suggest before I can second-guess myself. "Something simple? That's... sort of in between, isn't it? More interactive than a movie but less intense than Monopoly."
The suggestion hangs in the air for a beat before Soren's face splits into a wide grin. "See? Lydia gets it. She's a genius."
Lucian inclines his head slightly in acknowledgment. "A reasonable compromise. What did you have in mind?"
I hadn't thought that far ahead, and I feel my confidence wavering. "I don't know many games, to be honest. Maybe something easy to learn?"
"I know just the thing," Elias says, rising from his chair with a fluid grace that makes it look effortless. "We have a perfect card game for beginners—fun, simple rules, but still strategic."
He disappears into another room while Soren begins clearing the dessert plates, humming something upbeat under his breath. Finn stands to help him, their movements synchronized in a way that speaks of long familiarity. Lucian remains seated, his steel-gray eyes studying me with quiet intensity.
"You're enjoying yourself?" he asks softly, the question gentle but direct.
I consider deflecting, offering the expected politeness, but something in his gaze encourages honesty. "Yes," I admit, equally soft. "More than I expected to."
His expression warms, the subtle shift as meaningful as another person's broad smile. "Good. That's all we want." My hands are restless in my lap, unused to this kind of open sincerity. I'm saved from having to respond by Elias's return, a small box in his hands.
"Found it!" he announces triumphantly, setting the game on the table where our plates had been. "It's called Codenames. We can play in teams."
"Dibs on Lydia," Soren calls immediately, darting back to the table.
"That's not fair," Finn protests mildly. "You're already unnaturally good at this game."
"All the more reason to pair him with me," I say with unexpected boldness. "I have no idea what I'm doing, so it balances out."
Soren's delighted laugh rings through the dining room, bright and infectious. "See? She's perfect. My Lavender girl's got jokes!" The nickname still sends a flutter through my chest, equal parts pleasure and lingering discomfort at being so easily claimed. But it's becoming familiar now, almost comforting in its consistency.
Elias begins setting up the game, arranging small cards in a grid pattern while explaining the rules. It's simple enough—word associations, trying to get your teammate to guess certain words while avoiding others. Teams take turns, one person giving a one-word clue while the other tries to guess which words on the table it connects to.
"Finn and I will be one team," Elias decides. "Soren and Lydia the other. Lucian can be our neutral judge since we have an odd number."
"Perfect for Lucian," Soren stage-whispers to me. "He loves being the authority figure."
Lucian merely lifts an eyebrow, but there's a hint of amusement in his eyes. "At least I can be trusted to follow rules."
"Rules are more like... guidelines," Soren counters with a wink in my direction, and I find myself smiling back without thinking. We arrange ourselves around the table, Soren settling beside me while Finn and Elias take the opposite side. Our shoulders brush as Soren leans in conspiratorially.
"We've got this," he murmurs, his breath warm against my ear. "Elias overthinks his clues, and Finn's too literal."
"I heard that," Elias protests, though his expression remains playful. "And you're setting unrealistic expectations for Lydia. She'll be disappointed when you turn out to be terrible at this."
Soren clutches his chest as if wounded. "You wound me, truly. Just for that, we're going to crush you."
Lucian shakes his head, but I catch the small smile that flits across his face as he deals out the word cards. "Let's begin before Soren's trash talk gets any worse." The game starts, and I'm immediately drawn in by its simple but engaging premise. Elias gives clues to Finn, sometimes groaning when Finn misinterprets his meaning. When it's our turn, Soren proves to be surprisingly strategic, his playful demeanor shifting to reveal a sharp mind underneath.
"Nature, two," he tells me, his purple eyes intent on mine.
I scan the grid of words, trying to think like Soren would. "Forest," I guess, pointing to one of the cards.
"Yes!" He beams at me like I've done something remarkable. "And?"
I bite my lip, considering the remaining words. "Stream?"
"Perfect!" Soren throws his hands up in victory, then impulsively wraps an arm around my shoulders in a quick half-hug. "We're unstoppable!"
The casual touch startles me, but not unpleasantly. His enthusiasm is contagious, and I find myself leaning into the brief contact rather than pulling away as I might have just weeks ago.
"Lucky guess," Finn says with a good-natured eye roll. "Our turn, Elias."
The game continues, laughter bubbling up more frequently as the clues get increasingly creative or outlandish. Soren and I develop a surprising rhythm, often needing just a glance to communicate. It feels strange but exhilarating to connect with someone this way—intuitive, effortless.
"Last round," Lucian announces after we've played for nearly an hour. "The teams are tied."
"Pressure's on," Elias says, studying the remaining cards with intense concentration. "Book, three," he finally tells Finn.
Finn makes his guesses, getting two right but missing the third. Elias sighs dramatically, though his eyes shine with affection for his packmate.
"Your turn," Lucian tells Soren. "One word, one chance to win."
Soren studies the cards, his usual hyperactive energy channeled into focused stillness. "Home," he says finally, his eyes meeting mine with unexpected seriousness.
The word hangs in the air between us, weighted with meaning beyond the game. I look at the remaining cards, trying to think which one Soren would associate with home. And then I see it—the word "Haven" nestled among the others.
"Haven," I say softly, reaching out to touch the card.
Soren's smile blooms slowly, transforming his entire face. "That's it. That's the one."
"Winners," Lucian declares, but I barely hear him.
Home. Haven. The words echo in my mind, reverberating with implications I'm not quite ready to examine. Somehow, in this warm kitchen with these four men who have carved themselves spaces in my carefully guarded heart, the concepts don't seem as frightening as they once did.
Soren whoops victoriously, pulling me into another side hug. "Told you we'd crush them!"
Finn shakes his head, smiling. "Good game. You two have a surprising connection."
"We do, don't we?" Soren says, his arm still draped casually around my shoulders. The weight of it is comforting, anchoring me to this moment of unexpected joy.
My cheeks warm under the attention, but I don't pull away. Instead, I let myself sink into the feeling of belonging that wraps around me as surely as Soren's arm. My lavender scent—still strange to me after so long hiding it—mingles with theirs in the air, creating something new and complex and beautiful.
For tonight at least, I'm home.
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