81. Chapter Eighty-One
Chapter Eighty-One
I swim through warm fog, floating between sleep and waking, untethered from time and place. My body is a stranger, burning at the edges, whispering unfamiliar promises. I drift, unsure whether I am cocooned in dream or finally coming undone, until the heat of it presses in from all sides.
I couldn't be going into heat. I took precautions to prevent this from happening.Then I pause at that thought. It had been such a crazy week. I don't even remember when I took it last.
A sound cuts through my haze—a sharp, insistent ringing—and I grasp at it like a lifeline. It threads me to waking, to something outside this fevered warmth. The sound again, then silence. I breathe through my nose, slow and deliberate, but it only seems to feed the fire consuming me.
The doorbell. I open my eyes, blinking against the room's half-light. I am on the couch. I don't remember moving here… I remember laying in bed. I breathe again. My whole body aches with the effort.
Another sound, like a small animal in pain. I realize it comes from me. A knock at the door now, loud and urgent. Whoever it is, they're not going away. It starts again. I flinch, then force myself to stand. My limbs feel molten, barely my own. Each step is a mile.
The doorknob is cool against my skin. I turn it slowly.
The rush of air and light spins my vision. I sway, gripping the door frame. I look up and see a flash of chestnut hair, eyes the color of sunlight through leaves.
"Lydia! Are you alright?" Elias's voice grounds me and unravels me all at once. I feel like I am in a fever dream as he steps inside, his scent washing over me. I sink against the wall.
He kneels next to me, warm hands on my arms. "Come on, pretty girl. Let's get you comfortable." His touch sends a jolt through my overheated body.
The world blurs at the edges. I hear footsteps, then a deep voice cutting through the haze. "What's going on?" Lucian.
I blink up at them. Elias, his brow furrowed in concern. Lucian, solid and certain behind him. I try to form words, but a wave of heat silences them.
"We are taking her home," Lucian says, firm but gentle. "She was going to be coming soon anyway; we are just moving it up a day it seems."
I give another whine, tears in my eyes. The world is bright and shifting, sounds echoing through water. Elias is still holding me, his touch both soothing and electric. The others are there too. I hear them talking quietly as I curl more into myself, but in the next moment, I am in someone's arms, causing a noise of distress to leave me.
"It's alright. We got you." I don't know which of them says it, but their voice wraps around me, a promise. The movement lulls me. I don't know how much time has passed, whether minutes or days. Only the echo of my name, filtering through the fog. Elias. Lucian. And maybe Finn and Soren as well. The flare of it pushes me deeper into the haze.
I feel the movement stop, and I am newly aware of everything. Of voices. Of hands. Of the open door and the cold air and the bright sting of morning.
I blink in the light as Lucian lifts me, as warmth floods every cell of me with his touch.
"Good girl," he says, cradling me against his chest. A jolt travels through me, and I let a whimper escape. I am unguarded. Wild. Lucian seems to know, seems to know exactly what it means. I am lost, lost to him and the moment. He seems to enjoy it.
"Good girl," he says again, drawing me closer. "Like that, do you?" I hear Elias, falling into step beside us.
My heart drums its answer. I am new to myself, undone and remade, and it scares me. "I don't know what you're talking about," I tell him, the lie too fragile to hold. They both know. Their laughter cuts through the air around me.
We move inside, the world opening into warmth and scent and safety. I am aware, more aware than I want to be. Of Lucian's hands on me. Of Elias, so close. I want to hide. I want to be seen.
I want them to never let go.
"You're alright, Lydia," Elias says, his voice gentle, coaxing. I don't know if I believe him, but the way he says my name keeps me from falling. I look at Lucian, hoping for something I can't name. His gaze is hot, steady. I can't look away.
He reads me, knows me, and that terrifies me. It excites me.
"Let's get you settled," he says, as if settling me is the easiest thing in the world.They carry me up the stairs, and I wonder if I will ever have this moment again. This one, pure, where nothing else intrudes.
A door opens, and I could see the nest. It was inviting and the scents of everyone combined made me whine softly. I open my mouth again, but my body betrays me, makes its own reckless decisions.
"I forgot to take them," I whisper to Lucian as he lowers me into the nest. "Everything... I forgot to take them."
He shakes his head, his hands still on me. "Lydia. Going into heat is normal." He says it like a promise, not a fact. His eyes hold me, deep and full. "It may just move up our marking."
The words hit me, all at once. My body comes alive under them, every nerve awake. The fear slips away, quicksilver and bright, and something more primal takes its place.
Heat spreads through me. I can't stop it. I don't want to. Lucian senses it, the change in me, the flood of it. He doesn't move. His gaze doesn't leave mine, not even for a second.
Another wave crashes over me, a fierce, wild release. I feel slick starting to pool between my legs, wet and urgent. He must smell it, all of them must, but he stays where he is.
Dark eyes, hot and waiting.
I am the first to look away as another wave hits me, hard, and I moan, clutching at the bedding. I can't hide this. Can't hide anything.
I can feel them all around me. Elias. I knew he'd be the first to speak. "We can let you ride it out alone, or we can help."
I hear the smile in his voice, and it stokes the heat into something new. "We can still do the marking. Or wait, if you'd rather."
They make it sound so simple, as if my world isn't spinning apart. "It's your choice, Lydia." Lucian is right there, dark eyes never leaving me.
They will wait, I know they will wait if I ask. But I don't want to wait. I've been waiting too long.
I look around the room. Elias, Lucian. Finn. Soren. Their presence sets every nerve alight. They are all waiting. I want my pack. I want my Alpha and Omega. It's a bold move to make, but I am past caution.
"I want my pack," I say my thoughts out loud for them to hear, words fierce and urgent. "My Alphas and Omega."