4. Luna
Luna
“O h no, blue isn’t your color,” my mom says from behind me as I look in the mirror.
I actually really liked the dress, but as my mom clicks her tongue, she has me doubting myself.
“Maybe yellow,” she says, and I grimace.
She’s dressed like she’s the one going on a date tonight, her blonde hair in a blowout, a full face of makeup, and a skin-tight black dress.
Her heels click against the linoleum as she glares at me.
“Yellow will wash me out.”
“Well, blue makes you look sick,” she says, pulling a deep maroon dress from the rack and handing it to me. “Try this one.”
I hold back my eye roll as I grab the dress by the hanger and shut the dressing room door behind me.
I don’t even want to be here shopping for a dress—for a date I don’t even want to go on.
But if it gets my mom off my back, it will be worth it.
Maybe I can say I have a stomach ache in the middle and come home.
If my mom picked the pack, I know they’re going to be a bunch of stuck-up assholes.
They’ll probably think that I need to stay home and pop out as many babies as they want right away.
Don’t get me wrong, I want kids—someday.
But I’d like to live a little first, be the center of attention when it comes to my pack.
Maybe travel or find something I really enjoy.
I sigh as I look in the mirror. The dress is pretty.
It’s tight against my chest and flairs at the waist. I just don’t like it as much as I like the blue one.
When I step out of the dressing room, my mom claps.
“That’s the one. Less slutty,” she says as she makes me spin around. I repress a scoff as she directs me to keep the dress on. Her friend is doing my hair right after this, and then I go right to my date.
I thought maybe this would appease her, and she’d back off of me for just a moment, which is a delusional way of thinking.
She doesn’t stop speaking. “Jordan is a doctor, José is a lawyer, and they have a Beta named Ted, but I don’t know what he does.
” The way she talks about the Beta isn’t surprising.
I’m not exactly sure how my mom ended up with Stewart, but I know she thinks he’s less than her.
Anyone who isn’t an Alpha is less, and other designations are there to give Alphas what they need.
“I’m sure they’re nice.”
“You need to focus on Jordan and José. They’re the ones you need to impress. So no sassy comebacks. Always act interested in what they’re saying, and try to find something you enjoy that’s similar.”
She’s fussing with the sleeve of the dress, and I shove her hand off my shoulder. “Despite what you may believe, I know how to speak to people.”
She clears her throat and takes a step back. “I’m just trying to help, Luna.”
“I know.”
“I just want you to have the best. My daughter deserves the best.”
She heads to the counter to pay for the dress as I collect my purse and clothes. Her daughter . Not that I—Luna, as a person—deserve the best, but because I’m a reflection of her is why I deserve the best.
I take one look back in the mirror and hang the blue dress up to be restocked.
I hate how symbolic it is. How it feels like everything I want is out of reach because of my mother.
I’m hoping that changes soon. I made two grand last night.
Two-fucking-thousand-dollars in one night.
It’s not like I have many bills right now, but if I can keep it a secret for a few months, I’ll be able to get out of her house and live for myself.
I’ll be able to buy the blue dress I want and not feel guilty and be able to go on the dates I want to.
Even if I don’t truly want to go on a date at all, at least it will be my decision.
“Luna, today,” my mother says after checking out. I give the cashier a polite smile as I follow her out of the store, and we head over to her friend Jenny’s house.
My hair has more volume in it than usual, and I have to blink multiple times to get used to the fake eyelashes that Jenny put on.
I’m sitting next to the Beta who goes by Teddy, not Ted.
José and Jordan sit across from us, and I can’t help but feel the power dynamic.
It’s a statement of them being the Alphas and the ones in charge.
It’s hard to not roll my eyes and tell them how chauvinistic and douchey they seem.
“So, Luna, do you have any hobbies or passions?”
“I really love animals, reading, and I like gardening as well.”
José smiles and nods his head, but Jordan doesn’t look impressed. “I like reading too,” Teddy says next to me.
“Were you asked a question?” Jordan says to the Beta.
I glance over at the Beta, and he looks his head down, fidgeting with the material of his pants. “Sorry, is he not allowed to speak openly?”
Jordan glares at me.
“Listen, it’s really cute how you got all dressed up for this date, but the only reason we need an Omega is to have a baby.” He puts his arm around José’s shoulder, and they both nod their head.
I give them a wide smile. “Wow, I love going on a date and being treated like all I am is a uterus. This has been great.” I stand up, swearing Teddy smiles at me, and as I walk past Jordan, he grips my arm and tugs me back.
“You leave this date like this, and I’ll make sure all the Alphas I know in the area know to steer clear.”
I smile like a pageant queen and yank my arm out of his grasp. “That’s so sweet of you, Jordan. Thanks for helping me with that little problem.”
“I told you we should have made that other girl an offer,” José says to Jordan.
“She was poor,” Jordan replies. I give Teddy a pleading look, nearly begging him to walk away with me—that he deserves better.
But he shakes his head, and I walk to the bathroom.
No way am I going to call my mom. She dropped me off, I’m sure in hopes that I would go home with these assholes and bond them on the spot.
I don’t want to go home tonight, but I can’t stay here.
I splash some water on my face and groan.
I attempt to pull the eyelashes off with no success.
I do my best to avoid Jordan and his pack as I leave the restaurant and start walking.
It’s stupid to walk alone in the dark, but there’s a shopping center down the street with ice cream.
Moose tracks will make everything better.
I didn’t even get to eat, that’s how awful they were.
Truthfully, I want to cry. This is the part of being an Omega I hate.
So many people see me as a thing, as my designation, not who I am.
I just want someone to look at me, the real me, and like what they see.
I’ve never had anyone give me that, not even the person who’s supposed to love me the most in the world.
My eyes might be watery as I get my ice cream and sit on the curb and eat it like the depressed loser I feel like I am.
There are only two things left open in the shopping center, the ice cream shop and The Vapor Lab. Two guys are laughing outside when the door opens, and they go inside, but another figure walks out. I turn back to my ice cream and self-pity.
I knew the date was a bad idea; I knew nothing good would come from it.
But to have an Alpha outright say that I’m an incubator and a lower-class citizen makes me feel like trash.
Honestly, it makes me want to go back to Lavender Moon.
I feel more respected there than I do anywhere else nowadays.
Lavender Moon is extremely picky about their members.
While I obviously don’t know what their true stance is on Omegas, everyone has showed me more respect than the two “esteemed” Alphas I was with tonight.
“Luna?” a soft voice says above me. I turn my body and shift on the concrete curb.
I look up to see James’ beautiful face. He’s so handsome, he truly could be a model.
I don’t think I’ve seen a man with such a sharp jaw or perfect skin.
He sits down next to me, stamping out his joint and looking out to the dark street with me.
I may sniffle a little bit and shrug. “Hey, James.”
“Why are you alone?” he says.
“Bad date, why are you alone?”
He smirks and shakes his head. “I go where I want.”
“Ezra and Ian don’t go everywhere with you?” I ask, confused.
“No, I like my space.” I shrug in some understanding. But if I were with Ezra or Ian, I would want them following me around everywhere. “What happened on the date?”
“I didn’t even want to go. My mother set it up.” He grimaces at the mention of my mother.
“You need a ride home?” he asks. My ice cream has nearly melted in my hand. I shake my head.
“No,” I say softly.
“You want to go somewhere else?”
“With you?” I ask, my tone probably far more hopeful that it should be.
“Yeah, with me.” I smile and nod my head.
He holds his hand out for my dripping ice cream.
I hand it to him, and he takes a swipe with his tongue.
It’s fucking hot, insanely hot, watching him lick up the melting dessert.
Maybe the hottest thing I’ve ever witnessed—I really need to get out more.
He doesn’t care that I was just licking it.
He hums at the flavor and then tosses it in the trash.
James grabs a few napkins from the counter and hands them to me, so I can clean off my hands.
He holds his hands out, and I grab them as he tugs me up.
We’re standing so close together that I can smell his cinnamon and clove scent.
I haven’t been attracted to any of the Omegas’ scents at the club, but James’ scent does something for me.
If he scents me, he doesn’t let anything on as he heads to his car.
James opens my car door for me silently as he rounds the vehicle and starts the engine and drives off.
I trust him completely while he drives downtown.
The windows are down, and the humid air clings to my skin and makes my hair fall slightly.
I smile to myself, liking the idea of the fit my mother would be throwing right now.
The ride is quiet but content. I like just being around James. There isn’t an overwhelming need to fill the silence like there is with other people.
He eventually pulls over to the side. The beach is to the left, and we both get out of the car.
I expect him to walk me over to the sand, but he doesn’t.
He stands before an empty lifeguard chair and points his head in the direction.
I follow and climb up. I’m pretty sure I give him a clear shot of my panties in this dress.
But James doesn’t say anything as he climbs up next to me, and we share the seat.
He pulls a pack of Skittles out of his pocket, and I hold out my palm.
When we both have a fist full, we both do the same thing, separating them by color and eating them accordingly. It makes me smile. It seems I found another Omega with a serious sweet tooth.
“Your mom’s a bitch,” James says, breaking the silence.
“She is,” I say in agreement.
“If you could move out tomorrow, would you?” he asks. His eyes connect with mine. He doesn’t smile; honestly, I’m not sure I’ve seen James truly smile, but I know I’d like to. I throw the stack of red skittles in my mouth and chew before answering him.
“That’s the plan.”
“She has plans?” he says with a smirk.
“I’m tired of feeling like everything is out of my control,” I say, confiding in him.
“I can understand that.” I nod my head. If anyone understands, it’s James. He’s an Omega just like me, except he has everything that I want.
“But you have an amazing pack,” I blurt out before I can think.
He smirks and leans back, the back of his head resting on the back of the lifeguard chair. “I love Ezra and Ian. But I’m more than having a pack.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”
“I know you didn’t, babe,” he says. I melt into the chair as he says it. He acts like he didn’t just call me a sweet name as he continues. “Do you ever feel like you were born with the wrong designation?”
As much as I might hate some of the stigma around being an Omega, I can’t say I’ve felt the same way, so I shake my head no.
“That makes sense, you were meant for this. Sometimes I feel like I should have been a Beta.”
My eyes widen. “Don’t most people want to be Alphas?”
“I like my personal space, my alone time. It’s hard getting that as an Omega.”
“I wish I had less personal space,” I say under my breath, and James laughs. His laugh is soft but damn if it doesn’t make goosebumps cover my whole body. “How’s Ian?” I ask. I haven’t seen him in a few weeks, and he hasn’t spoken to me since Ezra picked me up that night.
“He’s fine, a little stressed.”
“Why is he stressed?” I look over at James, and I know worry is written on my face.
“Can’t seem to focus lately.”
“Mmm,” I hum and try to think what might be bothering him. “He hasn’t been over for family dinner in a while. None of you have.” I may sound a little pathetic, like the highlight of my week was when they came over. James takes pity on me and lightly squeezes my thigh.
“I’ll change that.”
“Really?” I say excitedly and look over at him. He’s looking at me in a way I’ve seen him look at Ezra before. Like he’s fascinated with me. Surely he can’t be fascinated by anything I say or do, but it makes me feel cared about nonetheless.
“Yeah, how about Sunday?”
I have to work Sunday, but I should be able to have dinner first. I’m just so excited to see them all again. I nod my head eagerly and smile. “I’d love that,” I tell him. He squeezes my thigh one more time.
We sit on the tall bench just a breath away from each other in silence, enjoying the breeze from the ocean and looking at the dark vast space in front of us. It’s the most untroubled I’ve felt in years.