CHAPTER ELEVEN
Asher
After another lap where both my timing and technique sucked, I rolled into the garage at the Venburn track. My head wasn’t in the game. Racing demanded focus; mine was with the girl I’d avoided for almost a week.
Ethan walked in as I tugged at the zipper of my suit, ready to change and ride back to Stetbourg.
“Leaving already?” He arched a blond brow.
“Yeah. I’ve got somewhere to be.”
He planted a hand on his hip, eyes sliding over me. “Come on. I hoped we’d race at least once. Unless you’re scared. This track’s not for the weak.”
Ridiculous. I was never scared—but I didn’t want to be late for Kaia’s showcase.
His smug grin made me hesitate. If I refused, he’d take it as a win. I couldn’t afford to look like the rookie he thought I was.
Fuck. He wasn’t giving me a choice.
I grabbed my helmet. “One lap.”
“Awesome.” He rubbed his gloved hands together. “May the best racer win.”
We rolled our bikes onto the grid. He’d waited until now on purpose—after hours on the track, my energy was low. He must’ve seen me half-assing some laps, but that had everything to do with Kaia and nothing to do with my skills.
The steady rumble of the engine surged through me, pumping confidence into my worn-out body. I could do this. And I couldn’t wait to show Ethan what I was made of.
We flipped our visors down. I nodded, and Ethan launched ahead, flying down the straightaway.
I caught up, but instead of obsessing over passing him, I fixed on the first corner.
The apex would test my speed. I leaned through it, then braced for the chicanes the track was notorious for, heart pounding, lungs burning.
I clamped the tank with my knees, shifting my weight as my upper body flowed with the bike into the second chicane.
After the third corner, my grip tightened. A hairpin loomed ahead, demanding every ounce of focus.
Dad’s voice filled my head.
Keep the bike upright. Slow gradually. Use both brakes.
I squeezed my eyes shut for a breath, drawing strength from him. He wasn’t here, but it was as if he still guided me.
I turned in, easing off the front brake as I leaned. His voice carried me through until I tore into the last stretch.
Adrenaline roared in my veins, every nerve alive, reminding me why I loved racing. I slowed at the finish line, chest heaving as I glanced around.
Ethan caught up a minute later, killing his engine before ripping off his helmet. “Damn.” He panted, wide-eyed. “Who would’ve thought you could do that?”
I swung off my bike. “Do what?”
“Well.” He inhaled and exhaled, trying to steady his breathing but not quite managing. “Everything you did out there. Like I said, this track’s no joke.”
I couldn’t tell if he meant it as a compliment. The way his pale blue eyes dragged over my face—half curious, half jealous—made my gut twist. I pulled off my helmet and raked a hand through sweat-soaked hair. “The track’s fine. I had fun, Ethan. See you soon.”
It had to be past five, and I needed to go. I rolled my bike into the garage to the sound of his dry chuckle.
“See you soon?” He followed me inside. “I thought we’d grab drinks. It’s Friday—what’s the rush?”
His tone was reproachful, but I owed him nothing. He wanted a race, and he got one. I wasn’t in the mood for drinks, least of all with him. And I’d be damned if I missed the showcase.
I glanced over my shoulder. “Maybe some other time.”
He smirked. “Sure. Whenever your busy schedule allows. See you, champ.”
Champ. I cringed inwardly at the nickname. Ethan finally left, and I changed as fast as I could before jumping back on my bike.
The two-hour ride to Stetbourg blurred past in a haze of anxiety. I worried more about being late than about a speeding ticket. Pushing the limit got me downtown with ten minutes to spare—enough to buy a bouquet of pink and white roses and rush to Kaia’s dance studio.
Families clustered outside, waiting to go in. Russell and my mother should’ve been here, but they’d chosen each other over Kaia’s showcase. Russell hadn’t even bothered with a convincing excuse about some important meeting. I wasn’t about to remind two grown-ass adults of their responsibilities.
I only cared that Kaia didn’t feel alone. I’d watch her dance, give her the roses, and leave.
The crowd streamed into the hall, and I followed, finding a seat in the back where she wouldn’t spot me. I wasn’t here to distract her.
When the lights dimmed, I balanced the bouquet on my knee and shifted on the plastic chair. A couple beside me clapped and shouted, “Go, Tessie!”
I didn’t know who Tessie was, but the second my gaze found the stage, every nerve ending lit up.
Kaia stood at the center, eclipsing every other girl. Taller. Brighter. My chest tightened, and I stared—finally letting myself.
The music started, and she moved first. My pulse kicked like the engine of a bike revving too high.
Lights slid over her flawless skin, each beat syncing with the sway of her hips, the clean snap of her arms. The choreography was fast, intricate, but she flowed through it like the music lived inside her.
I couldn’t look away. Every grin she flashed at the audience shot through me, sparking something reckless, and when her smile melted into that fierce, focused pout, my stomach dropped like I’d taken a corner too fast. Racing gave me adrenaline, but this—watching her—was different. Sharper. Dangerous in its own way.
The crowd blurred. My entire body tuned to Kaia, every nerve buzzing as if she pulled me forward without even trying. I wanted to freeze the moment, keep her under the lights where nothing—not Russell, not school, not her shitty job—could dull her shine.
Applause exploded when the number ended. People leaped to their feet, clapping and cheering, but I barely registered it. My eyes hunted only for her, soaking in every second until she clasped hands with the others at the edge of the stage.
Applause and cheers filled the room as families rushed forward. My gaze locked on Kaia.
She smiled at a woman with locs who gave her a thumbs-up, but once the woman left, Kaia’s face dimmed. She slipped aside, alone, while other dancers’ families crowded the stage.
Heaviness settled in my chest. She didn’t deserve this. I’d accepted my mother never watching me race because she claimed it reminded her of Dad’s accident. But Russell had no such excuse. He should’ve been here.
Before I could talk myself out of it, I moved toward her. She sat on the stage steps, feet dangling. I stopped a few inches away.
“Peque.”
Her blue eyes darted to my face, widening. “Ash? What are you doing here?”
I handed her the roses. “For you. You did great. Congratulations.”
Kaia buried her nose in the petals, inhaling deeply. “They’re beautiful, but you didn’t have to.”
I wanted to do something nice for her, but I couldn’t say that. Tension rose between us, thick and invisible. I hated how awkward it felt—how avoiding her for days and then showing up here only made it worse.
“Ash.”
Her eyes found mine. She hugged the bouquet close and gave me a smile that made me feel like I was climbing on a bike for the first time—scared, anxious, but excited too.
“What?” I asked past the lump in my throat.
“I’m glad you’re here. But we have a party now, so you can leave if you’ve got somewhere else to be.”
“Who’s taking you home after?”
She glanced toward the cluster of girls on our right. “I could ask Tessa. Or Imani, I guess.”
She didn’t sound convinced. Which meant leaving wasn’t an option.
“I’ll wait,” I said. “I can sit somewhere, and you’ll call me when you’re ready.”
“You can stay for the party. Some girls invited their boyfriends. And friends,” she added quickly.
Pink spread across her cheeks. Cute. Still, I kept my expression neutral and shrugged. “Let’s go then.”
She led me out of the hall into another room, where a table of food and drinks stood opposite a mirrored wall. Groups of dancers milled around with paper cups in hand. We dropped our things on a chair and took in the scene.
“Kaia!” a blonde girl called, raising her cup. “Come here!”
Kaia shot me a doubtful look, then slid her small hand into mine and tugged me toward the group.
The tingling in my fingertips caught me off guard. The sensible part of me said to let go, but instead I tightened my grip.
The blonde and a curly-haired guy looked me over as we stopped at the table.
“Guys,” Kaia said. “This is Ash, my—”
“Friend,” I cut in before anyone noticed her hesitation. Thank fuck she hadn’t called me her brother while her hand was still in mine.
“I’m Tessa,” the blonde said. “And this is my boyfriend, Bobby. Kaia and I have been dancing together for two years. Did you guys meet at school?”
Kaia glanced at me. “Ash graduated already.”
Tessa smiled. “Cool. I’m gonna grab something to eat. Have fun!”
Bobby followed her down the table.
Kaia slipped her hand from mine and studied the food. She picked up a taco. “Want some?”
The nerves had my stomach knotted, even though I hadn’t eaten since lunch. “I’m good, thanks.”
Kaia took a bite. “Worried about your abs?”
“Should I be?”
Her lips curved into a teasing smile. “Nice try fishing for compliments, Asher. You won’t get any.”
A playful retort rose, but I swallowed it back. If only I could go back to treating her the way I had on the beach last Sunday.
I looked away as she finished eating.
The overhead lights cut out, replaced by multicolored beams. The woman with locs clapped her hands, calling out, “We did it!”
“That’s Imani, our instructor,” Kaia said over the noise. “I’ll be back, okay?” She darted to the center of the room, where her friends circled the instructor, hugging one another.
What would it feel like to have her arms around me?
Joder. I couldn’t think like that. I crossed my arms and leaned against the wall by the table, fighting myself. Harder than I thought.
Distance didn’t stop me from liking her. Couldn’t. She pulled me in like a fucking magnet.
Colorful beams skimmed across her face as she laughed with her friends, raising her paper cup to clink against Tessa’s. Then her blue eyes found mine. She touched Tessa’s arm and came back to me.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to leave you alone.”
“It’s okay. It’s your party.”
Kaia traced the rim of her cup with her nail, eyes downcast. “Why did you come here today, Ash?”
“I hated that your father didn’t.”
“My father. I see.”
She took a sip, but her jaw trembled. Regret slammed into me.
I hated Russell for not showing up—but that wasn’t why I’d broken every traffic rule to make her showcase. And it wasn’t why I couldn’t tear my focus from her now.
But admitting that would only give her false hope. I couldn’t lead her on. Just the thought of hurting her made me sick.
There couldn’t be an us.
A slow song began. Couples drifted to the floor. My pulse thundered in my ears.
One.
Two.
Three.
The pressure behind my ribs tightened.
Kaia forced a smile. “I’ll get you some water. You must be thirsty.”
“No.” I caught her wrist gently, keeping her close. “Go have fun with your friends. You deserve it.”
Sadness and confusion flickered in her eyes before she turned and left me standing there.
Maybe it was for the best.
Maybe I’d get better at lying to myself.