Chapter 38
Ashia
Two Days Later
I'm sitting on our living room couch, rewatching ‘The Office’ and scrolling through my phone. Daisy lays beside me, providing me some warmth. She’s not in her normal head-on-my-belly position right now, though.
Her tongue is hanging out of her mouth in the cutest way, and she’s turned so her belly is pointed towards the ceiling.
I’ve been scratching her for about twenty minutes now.
Has she had enough? Absolutely not. I tried to stop about five minutes ago, and her head snapped up at me like I insulted all of dog-kind or something. So, I continue to scratch her.
Ezra’s been keeping me company the past few days, and while I knew he was an interesting guy, I had no idea he was so funny.
He promised to keep me entertained, and he has not disappointed.
Between his jokes and his clumsiness, the past few days at home have been a big comedy show.
It took Zeke a lot of convincing to leave someone other than him, Alex, or Carter in my direct vicinity, but eventually he caved.
One of them is always checking in, though, and when they’re not looking into possible leads on Damien, at least one of them is here.
If not all of them, watching over me like a bunch of hawks.
Serena went into the hospital to check on her caseload this morning, and she’s going to come back with us after my appointment—which is in about an hour.
While she and Carter still aren’t really back to more than casual conversation, it’s been nice having them both here.
Zeke pulls Carter’s chain every chance he gets, and I thought the two were going to fight a couple of times, but mostly, it’s been soothing.
This time away is nicer than I expected it to be.
Alex has been able to spend more time with his wife—so now I don’t feel so bad about being such a nuisance.
I’m not bugging them as much for information anymore.
Well, that’s mostly true, but it’s only because I convinced Kade to put the Attic’s system onto my phone without telling them.
I’ve been able to see everything logged into the system, including their personal notes.
And maybe their locations.
That may also include their dispatch notes, but it’s better than me texting literally every five minutes for an update.
I’ve been doing a little research of my own, trying to find anyone possibly linked to Avery.
There have been a few hits to pop up, but I don’t know if anything has come through yet.
By Zeke’s location, he just got back from Washington, D.C.
about five minutes ago. I’m waiting patiently for his call, and I’m only ‘patient’ because he doesn’t know that I know that’s where he was today.
My phone finally rings, and I almost drop it on the floor.
Excitement bubbles in my chest until I see Leanne's name come up instead of Zeke’s.
It’s not that I’m not happy to hear from her, but I’m dying for any information on Damien.
I sport half a smile before answering, hoping that she won’t notice the disappointment.
“Hey, sweetheart. How are you feeling?” Leanne asks me the moment the video call connects. She hasn’t left the hospital, but she seems pretty put together. Her hair is brushed, and she doesn’t look quite as tired anymore—even though I can still see the worry and longing in her eyes.
“I'm okay. How are you? How's John?”
“Well, he wanted to check on you himself.” She turns the phone to show him to me. He still looks pale, and the bandage around his neck looks freshly changed, but my chest swells a little when I meet his eyes.
“Are you…sure you're…alright?” he softly asks between shallow breaths. He’s not supposed to move or talk a lot for the next few days, but of course, just like his son, he puts the needs of those he loves before his own.
“Yeah, we're okay. I have an appointment there in a little less than an hour. I was going to come see you…”
He barely shakes his head, and I can see the pain on his face as he does.
“No—” he groans.
“Oh, honey. No,” Leanne says for him, and runs her hand over his head that’s actually growing hair.
I didn’t realize that his baldness wasn’t natural, and the image of him having hair is kind of weird.
It’s the same color as Damien’s, and it only makes them look more alike.
“There are too many germs down here. We don't want you to get sick. You’re already having such a rough time.”
I just nod lightly at her. Things have gotten a little better, and Serena says my blood pressure had started to come down some. So regardless of the fact that I want to take out any name that’s flashed across my screen in the past few days, I’m trying to look at the bright side.
“Serena brought you some clothes, right?” I ask, trying to change the subject.
“Yes, she did. You don’t need to worry about me. Just focus on yourself and our grandbaby. Call me once your appointment is over, okay?”
“I will.”
“Love you, sweetie,” she says softly, and it shocks me. It shouldn’t. I’ve seen how much they care for me just in the past few weeks, and I know that they would care for anyone Damien loves as harshly as me. I just don’t think she’s ever said it out loud before.
“Love y’all, too.” I hang up and stare at my home screen for a lot longer than I probably should.
It seems so long ago that Damien and I sat on his parent’s back porch and stared at the sky.
God, my heart hurts just looking at him.
His smile is so genuine in this picture, and he looks so carefree.
It’s crazy to think that we didn’t know this would happen then, and I wish I could jump through the screen just to go back.
“Hey, Ash. You ready? I got your lunchbox packed,” Ezra proclaims excitedly from the kitchen, but as he goes to swipe the bag, it topples over, and all of the contents fall to the floor.
Daisy perks up and flips over at the noise.
Her ears reach towards the ceiling, but then droop the moment she sees what caused it, like even she’s getting tired of his shenanigans.
His face falls in the most kid-like way, and I can’t help but ‘awe’ at him.
“Yeah, I am.” I stand up and walk over to help him pick everything up. My back and hips strain a little as I bend down, and I’m almost a little embarrassed by how I have to adjust. “We’re just going to an appointment, Ezra. I don’t need all of these snacks.”
He just shrugs and chuckles.
“Probably not, but it’s one of Zeke’s orders. Apparently, he’s going off some list D had, and I’m not going to be the one to tell him we strayed from that.”
My heart warms at the thought. Of course, my perfect husband would have a list of healthy snacks easily accessible.
I can only imagine the things he would be doing right now.
The nursey would probably already be done and set up, he would’ve had the entire house baby-proofed—more than it already was for Zeke—and I’m sure we’d be up to our ears in clothes, toys, and diaper boxes.
Serena has gently grazed the conversation on buying those things, and then tried to sneak in ‘how it would be easier for her if she knew what color to pick out,’ but I quickly shut her down.
I throw the last thing back into the lunchbox and zip it up. My hips and back pull a little as I stand back up, and when the baby kicks right into what feels like an organ, I chuckle to myself.
“You alright?” Ezra asks hesitantly.
“Oh, yeah. I can just definitely tell I’m halfway through this pregnancy now. It’s terrifying to think about how I’m going to feel in the next ten weeks if I already feel like this.”
“Well, that’s normal, right? That’s a good thing?
” He chuckles nervously, and while I’ve missed Damien terribly, I nod anyway.
It is a good thing, and I realize that. We may be having some bumps in the road with my weight and everything, but so far, the baby is healthy.
That’s the best thing I can ask for right now in this shitty situation.
“Yeah. It’s a great thing.” I smile at him and pat him on the shoulder before walking out to the car.
My eyes glance over at the Charger. I hate how it’s just sitting there collecting dust. Damien would be so upset if he saw how it looks.
I should really take it to the carwash or something, but don’t men usually take better care of their cars than that?
Maybe if I get the all-clear today, they’ll let me take it outside and wash it.
It is the first week of October, and I know the weather is already starting to cool off.
So, if I’m going to do anything with it, I should probably do it soon.
I make a mental note to ask the doctor and Zeke, then let Daisy in the back seat before I climb into the Equinox.
Ezra sits in the passenger seat and buckles in as I start it.
It might be even funnier this time around when the nurse sees me walk in with two men again.
At least it’s just two this time, and not four.
Zeke promised he would make it to my appointment, which is probably why he came back when he did.
It’s crazy how close we’ve gotten over the past few weeks, and now it’s like I can’t imagine a life where I didn’t know my brother.
He’s still going through a lot, and I notice him looking at Taylor’s picture sometimes, but he seems too preoccupied with all of this to sulk in his grief.
Maybe that’s better for him. He is the type of person that needs to stay busy.
He's opened up a little more about Taylor here and there, but it’s not often.
I know he's still hurting, and my heart breaks for him whenever I notice him zoning out, or when he seems a little more irritable.
He's avoiding how he really feels. I know I need to help him, but how can I when I feel so broken myself?