34. Nicole
NICOLE
It’s been hours, and we’ve been back and forth over what happened a million times, but the one thing Lucky won’t tell the officers is who picked him up from school. He has some sort of loyalty to this woman and it’s driving me mad not knowing who she is.
Detective Kincaid and several of his team, even qualified child therapists, have tried speaking to Lucky about her but he won’t budge.
The police have formally charged my dad.
He admitted to coming up with the plan on his own, but nothing adds up.
My dad isn’t a clever person. He wouldn’t have thought of this in a million years.
He’s covering for someone. Probably that fucking loan shark he owes money to.
But I can’t think about all that. I’ve got Lucky back in my arms and that’s all that matters right now.
As we head out of the playroom where Lucky was ‘interviewed’, I clutch his hand and thank the officers for being gentle with him.
Owen waits in the living room for us and smiles when he sees his son, but I can’t muster a smile for him.
I can’t even look at him after everything that’s happened. Guilt gnaws away at me.
He’s been understanding through everything.
When he found out about Lucky he understood.
When I told him my feelings about sharing him he understood.
He understands everything, and I don’t know how.
How can he be okay knowing my dad was the one who kidnapped his son and tried to extort a million pounds off of him?
How can he look at me and not resent me?
For the time he missed out on with his son and for nearly losing him because of me and my fucked up relations.
Lucky bounds over to him and I nod at the officer staying with us for the night. I take quick steps over to them, and when I get to where Lucky and Owen are embracing, I hesitate before saying, “Luck, it’s late, grab your pjs and brush your teeth, please.”
Owen’s gaze meets mine, but I look away quickly.
I can’t cope seeing the love in his eyes.
I don’t deserve it. My heart can’t take it.
When he asked me to be his wife it almost tipped me over the edge.
I want that more than anything, but I know it’s only a matter of time before he starts to resent me.
Lucky does as he’s told, and I follow after him to try to keep some distance between me and Owen. But he isn’t playing ball. He follows me closely, and all I want is to be safe and sound in his hands. The safest hands in the whole of England. But I can’t.
Tears spring to my eyes as I cross the threshold of our room, but I quickly blink them away. I grab some clean underwear, a pair of leggings and a t-shirt for tomorrow, my toothbrush and pjs, and try to head into my old bedroom.
“Where do you think you’re going?” His voice is behind me and I seize up a little knowing he’s so close.
“I think I should stay next door. It’s closer to Lucky.” Trying to hide the real reasons from him, I try to stand a little taller and focus on a spot by the door to keep the tears at bay.
He steps closer to me until I feel his breath on my cheek and his front pressed against my back.
“This is your bedroom, Nico. In here with me. I don’t want you in the other room.
I want to be able to hold you, smell you, feel your soft skin on mine as you wrap your leg over me.
I want your breath on my chest, your lips on my neck, and your hands on my body.
You belong in here with me. And if it makes you feel better, I’ll get Lucky to sleep in here too.
But just know, Nico, if you choose to sleep next door, I’ll be in there with you.
Wherever you are, it’s where I need to be. Do you hear me?”
Tears pool in my eyes and I nod because I don’t trust my voice to not show him my emotions. I quickly put my clothes on the bed as his footsteps retreat.
Finally on my own, I fall to the floor, hide my face with my hands, and sob, my tears falling freely at last.
Strong arms scoop me up, carry me into the en suite, and place me on the vanity unit. My hair’s brushed away from my face and my chin’s raised upward, but I squeeze my eyes shut to avoid looking into those crystal clear blue orbs.
A soft laugh floods my senses as his breath kisses my cheeks. “Whiskey Girl, don’t hide from me. I love you. I want you. And I need you. Without you, nothing makes sense. Marry me?”
His voice is soft and my heart is begging me to say yes, but instead, I shake my head.
Rather than storming off, angry with me for thwarting his second attempt at a proposal, he laughs softly again and kisses my forehead. “That’s two. Third time’s the charm, Nico. I love you.
“Now, wash your face, take a breath, and when you’re ready, we’ll be waiting in Lucky’s room. We can put him to bed together and then go to bed together as well. Agreed?”
I nod my head, eyes still shut. His lips brush over mine and a sudden heat engulfs me.
What starts as a gentle, soft kiss, quickly becomes a hard, passionate one.
His lips manoeuvre over my own expertly, guiding them apart, and his tongue dips inside to taste me.
I cling to him, desperate for his touch.
Moan against his lips and clutch at his shirt to bring him closer to me.
He breaks away, panting, and I open my eyes to find his gaze burning with need.
“There she is. Stop hiding my Whiskey Girl from me. I love seeing that fire dancing in your eyes. Don’t ever let the flames go out, Nico.
But if you do, I’ll do whatever I can to light them, again and again. Understand?”
I nod as he backs away from me, never breaking our gaze, until he’s left the room and I’m clutching the vanity with one hand and touching my tingling lips with the other.