Chapter 18
CHAPTER 18
If it was possible to actually die from embarrassment, she was certain she was at Death’s door as she forced herself to the couch and laid down. She couldn’t even bear to look at Samuel’s face as he undressed her, so she covered her face with her hands.
“I don’t wanna wear a diaper!” The words came out as a pitiful, high-pitched whine, humiliating her further.
The irony that she was, indeed, acting like a cranky toddler did not escape her.
“And I did not want to spend my lunch period arguing with a naughty Little girl.”
Well, now she felt guilty on top of mad and embarrassed and a whole host of other emotions. “You didn’t have to be here. Nobody else’s Daddies get called when they’re in trouble.”
“Director Chambers was only doing as I’d asked him to do. Legs up, Lizzie.”
She was really starting to hate that nickname. But she raised her legs as he’d instructed, unwilling to push her luck any more than she already had. She wasn’t sure how this could get any worse, but she was absolutely certain it could, somehow, and she wasn’t willing to test him to find out.
Soft cotton slid beneath her bottom, and then he was lowering her legs for her. The diaper was surprisingly comfortable and if it weren’t for what it symbolized—that she was no longer a Big girl who could be trusted to care for herself—she thought she might enjoy the feel of it between her legs.
“All right, Lizzie. Time to sit up, baby.”
His hands hooked under her armpits, pulling her up to a sitting position. The thick cotton of the diaper forced her thighs slightly apart, and she felt herself blushing as she tried to get comfortable.
Lowering her hands, she sent her stern-faced guardian a pleading look. “Please, Sir. I promise I’ve learned my lesson. I won’t ever, ever lie to you again.”
“I’m glad to hear that, baby. But you’re still wearing the diaper for the rest of the day.”
“But why? I said I learned my lesson!”
“Lizzie, you should know as well as anyone that a punishment doesn’t end just because a naughty girl says she’s ready for it to end. It ends when her Daddy decides the punishment has done its job.”
“I know but I might actually die if you make me walk around in this stupid thing all day. Do you want me to die? It’s probably a lot of paperwork if a student is humiliated to death on campus.”
Leaning down, he placed a finger under her chin and nudged her head back, his serious eyes boring into hers. “I need you to be one hundred percent honest with me, Eliza. If this is more than you can take, if you need to use your safe word, tell me now. I promise I won’t be mad.”
The only thing more humiliating than being forced to endure this punishment would be admitting that she couldn’t endure it. “I don’t need my safe word.”
“Then the diaper stays on until I’m ready to remove it. Come on, Daddy needs to get to class.”
Taking her hand, he pulled her up from the couch. She took a couple of experimental steps, and nearly broke down and called Red. “Oh my god, I waddle .”
“You do, and you look adorable.” After tucking a stack of diapers into his laptop bag, he hoisted it over his shoulder and held out his hand for her. “Hold Daddy’s hand so you don’t fall.”
“I am not going to fall.” But she took his hand anyway, because she wasn’t entirely convinced she wouldn’t, and the thought of falling on her face in the hallway was even more embarrassing than waddling her way to his classroom.
If there was one silver lining, it was that the bell for the next class rang just as they stepped out of Mr. Chambers’ office. Which meant the halls were nearly empty as they made their way to his classroom, and the few students they passed were in such a hurry they didn’t notice them at all.
On the flip side, it meant his room was packed full of students when they entered. All of whom stopped mid-conversation to look over at her. Heat flooded her face as he led her to his desk and pulled out his chair. The one saving grace in all of this was that her skirt was plenty long enough to cover the diaper, though it did nothing to muffle the sound of plastic rustling with every step she took.
“There are crayons and coloring books in the bottom drawer. Where is your phone?”
“In my bookbag,” she whispered back.
“All right. Ensure it stays there. If I catch you playing on it, I’ll have to put you in the corner, with your skirt tucked up and your diaper on display for everyone to see. Understood? ”
Oh god, oh god, oh god. “Yes, Sir.”
“Good girl. I’ll check on you again after I pass out the quizzes.”
As if being marched into his classroom and forced to sit at his desk with a dozen of her peers watching her with wide-eyed curiosity wasn’t bad enough, now he expected her to color? Like an actual child? In front of everyone ?
She’d rather be bored.
Her resolve for that lasted up until he launched into his review of the homework the night before. This class was well above her current level, and he might as well have been speaking gibberish for all she could understand.
Maybe nobody would even notice if she started coloring. Other than a few sneaky glances in her direction, they all seemed riveted by her guardian’s explanations. Maybe they actually liked math?
Weird.
As quietly as she could, she opened the bottom drawer of his desk and pulled out a coloring book and a box of crayons. And bit back a sigh when she realized the coloring books he had available weren’t even the fun adult ones with the wild patterns. They were actual children’s coloring books. Animals and fairytales and other little kid things.
But it was better than sitting there with nothing to do, so she opened the fairytale one and went to work. For a while, she was actually able to tune out the lecture and pretend she wasn’t being punished. Every now and then she would shift in her chair, and the diaper would crinkle, and to her it sounded so incredibly loud she cringed. When she looked up, however, nobody seemed to notice, so she was able to relax and get back to coloring.
She was halfway done with the first page when a shadow fell over the desk and she looked up to find Samuel smiling down at her. “You’re being very good for Daddy,” he murmured, leaning over to press a kiss to her forehead before he picked up a stack of papers from the desk. “Don’t forget to drink your water. Where’s your bottle?”
Even though it was, technically, a water bottle and not a baby bottle, her cheeks still heated with embarrassment at his question. “In my bookbag.”
“Drink up, and we’ll refill it after class. Do you need anything else?”
My phone. To get this stupid diaper off. To go home. But since she had a feeling all of those requests would be met with disappointment or worse, a scolding, she shook her head. “No, Sir.”
“Good girl. I’ll check in with you again in a bit.”
The rest of class went by without much fuss. She finished her water as instructed, and beamed at his praise when he took the empty bottle from her to refill. A couple of the students who she knew but didn’t hang out with regularly stopped by to chat after class ended. To her immense relief none of them even questioned why she was there or why she was coloring instead of doing her own homework, which went a long way toward relieving her embarrassment over the situation.
His next class trickled in as he was writing out new problems on the board. Kylie stepped into the room, her eyes going wide when she spotted Eliza.
“What’s going on? Are you okay?” she asked in a loud whisper that had other students glancing their way with open curiosity.
“I’m fine. I’ll tell you later.”
“Text me?”
“Um. I don’t know if I can. I got my phone taken away.”
Shaking her head, Kylie let out a disappointed sigh. “How much trouble are you in?”
“A lot. Like, a lot . I really messed up, Ky. ”
Now that she’d had plenty of time to think, she could admit how wrong she’d been. She should have been honest when Samuel had asked her about her other assignments, and she should have just owned up to forgetting instead of trying to copy Reese’s homework. Professor Remington would have let her make up the assignment, even if he would have docked a couple of points for being late.
And she sure as hell shouldn’t have been such a brat to Samuel and Mr. Chambers. She owed them both an apology, if she could make herself actually say the words out loud.
The bell rang again and Kylie hurried to her seat, though class being in session didn’t stop her from shooting worried glances Eliza’s way during the homework review. Eliza did her best to ignore her friend and focused on choosing a new picture to color.
Class was nearly over when disaster struck. Her bladder, which had already been making its needs known at the end of the last class, was becoming more insistent. She’d stopped drinking her water, but the longer she sat there, the more urgent her need became and even her embarrassment over the rustling of her diaper couldn’t keep her still.
Samuel approached the desk to pick up another stack of quizzes, a knowing smile playing on his lips. “You’re being very squirmy, little one. Do you need to potty?”
Even though he’d lowered his voice enough that no one could hear him, she couldn’t stop herself from glaring up at him. “Do you have to ask it that way?”
“Yes,” he replied simply. “Now, do you have to potty, Lizzie? Be honest with Daddy.”
“Oh my god, yes . May I please go to the bathroom?”
“Absolutely. Let me know when you’ve gone and I’ll take you somewhere private to change your diaper.”
No, no, no. Absolutely not. Wearing the diaper was one thing. Using it was another thing altogether. “Please let me go like a Big girl. I promise I’ve learned my lesson.”
“You may use the bathroom like a Big girl when you’ve proven to me you know how to behave like one. Until then, you will use your diaper like the naughty baby you chose to be.”
“I didn’t choose this.”
“Maybe not this, exactly, but you chose to lie to me and you chose to act out instead of admitting you were naughty. Now your choices have been taken from you until you show Daddy you can be trusted to make better ones. And a good choice right now would be using your diaper instead of holding in your pee and giving yourself an infection.”
“I can’t. Please, I really don’t think I can.” She hated that she could feel tears building up again.
“Do you need your safe word?”
Yes, yes, yes! “No. I’m not… it’s not… It’s just embarrassing .”
“All right.” Was it her imagination or did he actually sound a little disappointed? “Then you have until the end of class to wet your diaper.”
Picking up the stack of papers, he turned away from the desk, raising his voice to address the class.
She tried to ignore the growing urgency of her bladder, but the more she tried not to think about it, the more it seemed like that was all she could think about. And the more she thought about it, the worse it became.
Maybe she should just use the diaper. Closing her eyes, she tried to pretend she was on the toilet instead of sitting at his desk. But the thought of pissing herself in front of all these people overwhelmed her. A band of panic tightened around her chest, and for a moment she thought she might actually be having a heart attack .
“Red,” she whispered, her eyes still closed against the waves of disappointment and humiliation flooding her.
But her guardian continued addressing the class. Which meant he hadn’t heard her. Which meant she had to somehow find the courage to say it again. Dragging in a deep breath, she forced the word past her lips.
“Red,” she repeated, louder this time, prying her eyes open to see if he heard her.
He did. Stopping mid-sentence, Samuel whipped around to stare at her, his expression so alarmed it might have been funny if she hadn’t been on the verge of a full blown panic attack. “What was that? What did you say?”
“RED!” Now she screamed it, a sob bursting free as she covered her face with her hands. “Red, Red, Red, please, Daddy, I can’t do this!”
“Class dismissed,” Samuel snapped a moment before his arms came around her, lifting her up from her seat. “Shhh, baby. It’s okay. Daddy’s got you. Do you need me to take you to the bathroom or can you make it home?”
“H-home. Please.”
“Okay. Okay, baby. We can go home.”