Chapter Twelve
DESPITE NOT FALLING asleep until sometime after two in the morning, Beth woke with the sun.
A mess of emotions swirled in her head, heart, and stomach before she even opened her eyes.
Regret and shame for yelling at her father, annoyance at him for his rigidity and refusal to see her as an adult, frustration with her seeming limbo in life, and shock over the lines she crossed with Saint.
Of course, part of her still buzzed with lingering pleasure left behind by his talented hands and hungry mouth.
Her inner thighs ached from how hard she’d clenched them together as she came, and every time she shifted, she felt the phantom press of his fingers inside her, the ghost of his breath hot against her neck.
She was still slick between her legs, her body refusing to forget what her mind kept trying to file away as a one-time mistake.
God, what a mistake. Not because it was bad. No, no, no. The mistake came from the fact that she’d be thinking about him all day, every day, for the foreseeable future, and wishing she could go back for seconds.
And thirds.
Maybe even a fourth helping of Saint.
She pressed her thighs together and bit back a groan. At this rate, she’d need a cold shower before she could face her family.
But she couldn’t indulge again. They couldn’t, no matter how good it had been. She’d have to get that cold, hard fact through her stubborn skull.
With a sigh, she forced herself to roll over and sit up on the edge of the queen-size bed she’d had since she turned fifteen.
The walls no longer held One Direction and Supernatural posters, and the photos of her friend were replaced by tasteful artwork and framed family photos, but everyone still called it her room all these years later.
The clock read seven a.m. By now, her mom would have driven her youngest sibling to swim practice, and the older one would have driven herself to the diner where they bussed tables, following in Shell and Beth’s footsteps.
Copper should be home, though, and she owed him some face time.
After brushing her teeth, she padded out to the kitchen in her sleep shorts, tank, and the fuzzy slippers she kept here at her parents’ house.
After filling her favorite coffee mug, a large one that read World’s Okayest Adult, she glanced out the French doors to find her dad sitting on the rocking bench he’d gifted Shell five years ago.
Beth grinned at the way his enormous form took up more than his half of the bench. Her mom loved it, claiming it meant mandatory cuddles when they sat out there taking in the mountain view, which they did often at the end of the day with a glass of whiskey.
He, too, had an oversized mug of coffee wrapped in his oversized hands. As soon as she stepped outside, he glanced her way. “Hey, kiddo.” If he was smiling, it was hidden behind the coppery beard that earned him his name.
Already, the day had warmed to where she was comfortable in her sleep clothes.
“Everyone else up and out already?”
He nodded. “You gonna come sit with the grumpy old man?”
Rolling her eyes, she sat next to him. “You’re not old.”
His grunt was so familiar and comforting that it sent her back ten years to when she was a kid, unloading her problems on her superhero father. “But I am grumpy?”
She shrugged. “There have been some rumors.”
“Smartass. Just like your mama.”
Beth lifted her mug to hide her smile. They sat in silence, absorbing the peaceful view for only a few seconds before she felt compelled to speak.
“I’m so sorry, Dad. I was out of line last night.
I’m so sorry I yelled at you like that, and at the clubhouse…
” She shook her head. “I’m surprised you’re even talking to me this morning. ”
“Since when am I one to give the silent treatment?”
She snorted a half-laugh. “Never. You’re more of a holler-and-beat-your-chest type.”
“Exactly.” He fell silent, sipped his coffee, then said, “Suppose I was a little over the top going after Gator like that.”
Raising an eyebrow, she looked up at the man who raised her as though he’d made her. “A little.”
“I don’t want you with one of my guys, Beth. That’s a hard line for me.”
Guilt twisted in her, sharp and hot. He had no idea what she’d gotten up to last night, and he never would, but it was still a betrayal.
She could still feel the imprint of Saint’s mouth on her throat, could still hear the filthy words he’d growled against her skin as he made her come harder than she had in years.
Her father sat inches away, oblivious to the fact that his daughter had screamed one of his men’s names into the mountain air just hours ago.
Saint was right to call it off when he did, even if it dented her ego.
“I know, Dad. But Gator is nothing more than a friend. It’s like Mav kissing mom on the cheek.”
His face screwed up, making her chuckle. “Ugh, he is a little like Maverick, isn’t he?”
“A bit. Though I think he’s crazier if that’s even possible.”
Copper laughed, which made her smile. How had she not realized how much she missed her family? “I think you’re right on that one. I’ll… uh, I’ll try not to be such an asshole about you being friends with my guys. As long as you leave it at friendship.”
There was that clench of unease again. “I know. And thanks, Dad.” And that was that.
It had always been that way between them, open communication and little bullshit or emotional outbursts, save for last night.
They’d always been able to talk through issues and move on with ease, something she greatly appreciated about Copper.
She brought a leg up, bending her knee and resting her foot on the cushion as she leaned her head against her father’s bulky shoulder.
“So,” he said just as she’d gotten comfortable. “You ready to tell me what the fuck was going on in Texas?”
Her eyes flared as she stiffened. Shit, he’d notice her reaction for sure. “I…”
“Beth,” he said, his voice heavy with suspicion.
She didn’t even need to say anything for him to know she was full of shit.
Never had she been able to lie to him. Anytime she’d tried to pull one over on him as a kid, he’d known.
He’d see through her, and she’d crumbled, not able to spew untruths to the man she respected above all.
Of course, he’d known there was more to her ridiculous story about being overworked and stressed in Texas.
This was why she worried so much about hooking up with Saint.
As long as he didn’t sniff something suspicious and ask her, they’d be fine, but if he suspected and confronted her, she’d be screwed.
Lifting off his shoulder, she turned on the bench to face him, resting her back against the wooden armrest.
“Can you promise me you won’t lose your shit if I tell you?”
“No.” Not a flicker of a smile or twinkle in his eyes. He was dead-fucking-serious.
“Dad.”
“Christ, kiddo.” He rubbed his beard the way she’d seen him do a million times over the years.
How could she feel so nostalgic, yet so annoyed and so anxious at the same time?
“You know I’m unreasonable when it comes to you, your mom, and your siblings.
I won’t apologize for it, and it’s not going to change.
So no, I will not promise to keep my fucking wits about me when you no doubt tell me something I’m going to fucking hate. ”
“All right. Okay.” She sighed and stared at a hawk circling high above their house. It was time to let her family in on the deep, dark secret she’d been keeping for way too long. Facing him again, she found his green eyes, the same as hers, full of concern.
And love.
What a bitch she was to feel frustrated at being loved so deeply.
She averted her gaze once again, unable to look him in the eye as she unloaded the truth. “Jason turned out to be a… less-than-stellar boyfriend. I lost myself a little there in the end and needed to get away.”
Wow, cop-out much?
Copper’s jaw ticked. “Less-than-stellar?”
“Uh-huh.”
He didn’t need more details than that, right?
“Beth, I’m going to give you exactly five seconds to elaborate before I lose my fucking shit.”
Okay, so maybe he did want details.
“He, um, got a little rough with me.”
“Got a little rough with you.” The deep timbre of his voice turned lethal. “So, he… hurt you?”
Instant tears sprang to her eyes, and she blinked as rapidly as possible to keep them from falling. Tears were kindling to Copper’s burning fire. “He did.”
“Hit you?” The malice in his voice made her shiver. Not with fear. Never once had she feared him, but for anyone who crossed him.
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Worse?”
She nodded. “Yes.”
“And Saint?”
Her stomach bottomed out. “W-what about Saint?”
“Is he aware of this?”
“Uh…”
Her dad pinched the bridge of his nose as he nearly growled. “Swear to Christ, Beth, this is not the time to try and feed me a line of horseshit. Is. Saint. Aware?”
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
“I asked him, forced him really, to keep quiet.”
Copper was going to crack a tooth at this rate. She pulled his arm down so she could see his face, and the fury in her eyes had her wishing she hadn’t. “Please be mad at me. Not him. He only agreed to keep my secret because I promised to eventually tell you. I just needed some time.”
“So tell me, Beth. Tell me now and tell me everything.”
Oh, this was going to go over about as well as that time she and her friends decided to try riding his motorcycle when they were fifteen.
They tipped it and scratched the hell out of it before they made it out of the driveway.
Copper nearly had a massive coronary event, or maybe she’d had the heart attack while waiting for him to wake up and discover what she’d done.