Chapter 34
Chapter Thirty-Four
SIERRA
My apartment is eerily quiet when I rush inside. Papers are scattered on the kitchen counter. The closets are open. Little items have been moved. Drawers stand open with their contents pulled out.
I grab what I need as I run through. Shoes. Coat. Change of clothes. Headlamp. Then I realize I should try to disguise myself, so I go back and get a baseball cap and sunglasses for what that’s worth.
Stuffing everything into my backpack, I head for the door. My insides feel like ice as I rush out into the night. I take off on foot, knowing that moving my car is a no-go.
People like the men I saw could easily have bugged my car.
The first hints of daylight are changing the sky to gray-blue as I climb the stairs to Captain Rachel Reed’s apartment. I knock lightly, hoping not to draw too much attention.
A whisper of movement on the other side of the door tells me she’s looking through the peep-hole. “It’s me. Sierra.”
The door swings open. For a second, her mouth gapes, then her eyes harden. “Oh my lord, are you okay?”
I nod. “Can I come in?”
She grabs my hand and pulls me inside. “Of course.”
Rachel’s obviously been up a while, she’s in workout gear with a sheen of sweat on her forehead. “I heard about your accident, about your amnesia. I can’t believe you’re standing in front of me right now.”
“I’m here.”
Before I realize what she’s doing, she’s hugging me. It surprises me. We’ve been friendly, but we’ve never been close.
“I just had to do that. You look like you’re about to break. Sit down. Tell me what I can do to help.”
For a second, I just stand shocked and worried, then I stiffly move to her couch. I pray I didn’t just bring trouble to Rachel’s door.
“How are you feeling?”
“I’m okay, physically, but I’m here because I’m in a bit of a crisis.”
She lowers herself slowly into the chair in front of me. “How can I help?”
“Can I borrow your car or can you rent one for me for a couple of days?”
She blinks, drawing her brows together. “Uh, sure. But I think you should tell me what’s going on.”
“I’m concerned someone might track my purchases and I know I’ll need to use my credit card to get a car.”
Rachel’s sharp as a fresh razor blade, so she sees things others might not. “Are you in an abusive relationship?”
“Oh no….” I run my hand down my ponytail as I consider what to tell her. It’s only right that she knows the truth since I came to her apartment. I take a breath. “The boat crash wasn’t an accident, and the men who caused it are still trying to kill me.”
Her dark brown eyes harden to almost black. “Why would they want to kill you?”
“My brother’s involved in something bad…
and I don’t know exactly what yet. He’s been fighting addiction for the last year.
Last night two men who look like Special Forces guys broke into my apartment.
I overheard them saying my brother shouldn’t have gotten me involved.
But because he had, they had to kill me.
When I ran, I had to leave everything behind. ”
She rises and walks to the kitchen. A second later, she comes back with a key ring. “These are to my grandmother’s little Mazda. She passed a couple of months ago. I’ve just been holding onto it for sentimental reasons.”
“Are you sure?”
She walks back to the kitchen, sets a teakettle on the stove, as if me telling her that someone is trying to murder me is the most ordinary thing in the world. “Are you working with the authorities?”
I can’t sit still. My nerves are strung too tight.
Pushing off the couch, I pace across the room. “There’s a problem with that… I think the local police, at least the officer who was there last night, are friends with one of the men.”
She frowns as she drops tea bags into two mugs. “I know a guy in the ATF…”
Wringing my hands, I consider the risks of telling more people, and how long it might take for a federal agency to get involved.
Crossing her arms she watches me with concern. “Sierra, you look terrified.”
“I am.”
“Where is your brother now?”
My voice is raw with emotion when I speak. “Missing. Maybe even dead. He’s been missing at least since the boat crash put me in the hospital with amnesia. That’s the last time I saw or heard from him or his girlfriend.”
Rachel unlocks her phone. Jots a number on a piece of paper, then writes the name Max over the top. “He’s solid. I’d trust him with my life.”
“How do you know him?”
She sighs, scrunches her lips, and lifts a brow. “I dated him.”
“Oh.”
Rachel slides her phone back into her purse as the tea kettle begins to whistle. Steam rises from the mugs. I take the cup she passes me, trying to suppress the shaking in my hand.
After a thoughtful pause, she asks, “Is there anyone else you trust?”
“No.” My answer is definitive.
“Didn’t you date that Pararescue guy?”
My eyes flash to hers. I huff out a breath, force myself to sound calm. “I did date him for a while.”
“He’d be the perfect kind of man to have on your side right now.”
My heart clunks.
“Cole and I have history. And it’s not pretty.
The man, with his all-knowing attitude, took it in his own hands to have my brother arrested about seven months ago.
I was just minutes away from getting Bryan in the car to go to a safe mental health facility that specializes in addiction.
Somewhere that could help. Bryan had completely gone off the rails in the year leading up to that night. ”
That had been a horrible night. It makes my soul split in half to think about it.
Clutching the mug with both my hands, I stare into the pale tea. “I can barely wrap my brain around what had happened to take my brother down so far. He went from Army Special Forces to a deranged drug user. The night he got arrested was the pinnacle of his terrifying change. He had turned on me.”
“Oh no. That’s tragic, Sierra.”
My eyes close. The night replays in mind. The rage in his dark eyes is still so vivid it nearly makes me throw up.
Bryan was unhinged.
When I open my eyes, Rachel is watching me sympathetically.
I sigh heavily. “That night Bryan had been yelling at Evelyn and me. Then came the attack. He’s so strong, I couldn’t fight him off.”
A shiver tightens my muscles. I remember the way his fists felt against my skin. Brutal. Fast as lightning. Deadly accurate. Blows to my face, my gut, my ribs.
Tears well on my lashes. The physical pain from his attack is long gone. But the deeper damage will always be there.
Rachel’s hand covers mine. “Awe, hun, you need help. And far more than I can give you.”
Tears spill over my lashes and drip onto the kitchen bar before I can catch them.
Concern fills Rachel’s eyes as she watches me.
I try to hold on. But I can’t. It all comes dumping out of me. I haven’t told anyone else before. But the weight of it on my shoulders feels like too much.
“Bryan is a big man and he went wild. Hitting me all over. I went down instantly. Smashing my other cheek against the apartment wall as I fell. Blood ran down my face, filled my right eye as I lay in total shock on the floor. It was horrible. Inconceivable. Evelyn was screaming in the background, but my ears were ringing so loudly I couldn’t make out his girlfriend’s words. ”
I press my hand to my chest as my heart spasms. Thinking about that night always makes me feel like this. I take a minute to compose myself but I need to let this out.
“He had hurt me badly. Blood clouded my vision. I was trying to wipe it out when Cole, my boyfriend at the time, walked in the door. I couldn’t see much, but I could feel his fury and then he started to scream at Bryan. I thought my brother might die that night because Cole was so unchained.”
She hisses. “So bad. Honey, that’s awful. I’m sorry you had to go through that.”
Dashing away more tears, I try to steady myself.
It’s over. It’s past.
But my hands are shaking. I squeeze them together.
“That night is seared into my memory. It was the first time I’d been terrified of my brother.
But I knew he was sick. Cole had wanted me to have him arrested before, but I didn’t want to.
A few weeks before, my brother had slapped me and shaken me when he was high and out of control.
But never had he hit me with his fists. That night, he was like someone else, a monster in my brother’s skin.
But I knew it was a sickness. I really believed, and still do, that being arrested that night made things worse. ”
Her eyes are filled with empathy as she watches me struggle to keep the tears in. “Cole was trying to protect you.”
“He was, but it was violent. I knew it was going to be a horrible fight. They’re nearly equal in size and both trained to fight.”
I can still feel how raw my voice was in those terrifying moments as I yelled, Stop! Don’t, Cole. Please, he’s sick. He just needs help.
But it was useless.
“Cole was as irate as my brother. He was screaming, ‘Motherfucker. Sierra’s a woman. You could have fucking KILLED HER!’ It was the most horrifying thing I’ve ever seen.”
Rachel grips my hand tighter. Silently encouraging me to let it all out.
I swallow twice, fighting the pain in my throat.
“Before I could get my battered body moving, Cole pinned him to the floor and connected to 911 on his phone. Cole knew I was taking my brother to get mental help. But he called the cops. And Bryan’s downward spiral truly took on a new meaning.
The dishonorable discharge had been first. Then came the arrest. He did a short sentence, then disappeared on the streets afterward. ”
The ache inside of my chest threatens to swallow me. Rubbing both hands over my face, I try to shake off the shattering pain and exhaustion.
I’m shaking. I’m queasy.
Rachel wraps her arms around me as I sit on her kitchen stool. “I had no idea all that had happened. I can understand why you feel alone in this. I’ll do whatever I can to help.”
“No, no. I can’t let you get involved. I’m already worried that I could have put you in danger by coming here, but I didn’t have anywhere else to go.”
She steps back, crosses her arms. “Don’t worry about me. I can handle myself. I was raised by a survivalist. Let me just get you some cash and—”
I push off the stool. “The car is enough. I promise I’ll bring it back to you.”
She waves a dismissive hand as she retreats down the hallway. A moment later, she returns with a handful of cash and a pistol in the waist of her yoga pants. She passes me the money and an empty tan paper envelope. “Here, this should help.”
I’m astounded. “You just keep wads of money in your apartment?”
“And a gun or two. Survivalist training, babe. Do you want a pistol?”
“Do you think I should?”
She just raises a well maintained eyebrow at me.
I grimace, but worry that I should take it. “I don’t like guns.”
“Taser?”
“Uh… Yes.”
She pulls a small taser from the back of her yoga tights. “It’s easy to use.” She talks me through the controls.
Warmth fills me. “I’ll pay you back.”
“Just be ready, I’ll call in a favor one day.”
I hug her again, wishing I’d have had more time to get to know Rachel before. “Anything at all. I’m your girl.”
When she lets me go, she presses the post-it note in my hand. “Call Max, now. Don’t take chances. Let people who deal with these kinds of thugs help you.”
“I’ll think about it.” I should want help, but that feels scary too. Shoving the money and taser in my backpack, I thank Rachel again.
“Car’s around the back of the building. And be sure to enjoy the Barry Manilow CD…”
I make an exaggerated face. “I think I might need some heavy metal instead.”
She laughs as I close the door.