CHAPTER ONE #2
Tired of the same song and dance, I brush past him and walk into the restaurant before Mitch has a chance to hold the glass door open for me to walk through. I don’t need another lecture and would appreciate for both Dr. Jordan and Mitch to keep their opinions to themselves.
The flirty hostess takes me to the table I’d requested in the middle of the packed restaurant, and she stays a little longer than necessary.
After ordering a bourbon, I sit back and wait for my beautiful wife to arrive.
She’s the best thing that has ever happened to me and I thank the heavens that she walked into the bar that night.
The noisy restaurant quickly comes to a halt, and then mummers start.
Looking up, I see exactly what caused the pause.
My extremely gorgeous wife and mother of my baby walk in.
She is glowing, and the pregnancy is bringing it out more, along with her feistiness.
I never thought I’d find a pregnant woman attractive, much less fall in love and marry one, but the moment she looked into my eyes I was hooked for life.
She is the most challenging woman in my life and puts me through my paces more than any case I’ve ever been through.
Sometimes our arguments aren’t fun, but I find that the way we banter back and forth is such a turn on.
The other day I tried ordering for her at a restaurant because she had to have another bathroom break and when she came back, she not only put me in my place, but she also gave our waiter an earful.
I fight the smile, trying to break free from thinking about that dinner.
Saylor is truly one of a kind, and I’m a lucky bastard to call her mine.
We’ve only told our security and Dr. Jordan about the baby for now.
I’m hoping this problem that we’re facing will be over soon, and once we find out the sex of the baby, then we plan on making an announcement to the world and family.
I know our families will be ecstatic and now that I’ve gotten over my panic, I’m overjoyed with becoming a father.
I wasn’t at first, but once I settled down and heard Saylor and Dr. Jordan out, I knew this is what I was meant to do.
I watch as she talks with the hostess and get a heavy rock in the pit of my stomach.
The sunny sky is now turning to gloom in my gut.
Saylor approaches the table in the middle of the room and people are starting to recognize us.
We are usually shown to a private room or corner to keep out of the public eye but not today. Today I needed this to be public.
She has a breathtaking smile on and it makes me feel like shit.
“Hey, baby.” She comes over and I make no move to get up from my chair. All the years of manners have just been thrown out, and my mother would slap me upside of my head for this.
Saylor gives me a curious look, then bends down to give me a kiss. Just as she reaches my lips, I quickly turn my head and give her my cheek.
“Levi?” Saylor gasps and a hurt look graces her face.
Showtime.
I gesture for my wife to take a seat but still make no move to help her in her chair. Her small four-and-a-half-month pregnant bump gets my attention. I swear her body changes every day, and it takes all my might not to touch her.
Focus on the goal, Levi.
She orders a lemon water and we give our lunch order. As much of a prick as I’m about to be, she needs to eat before I follow through with this.
Saylor tries to hold a conversation with me the entire time, but I’ve only responded with short, clipped responses. After she’s taken her final bite, she places her fork down with a clatter and throws her napkin across the plate.
Here we go.
“Levi, talk to me. What’s wrong, you’re not being yourself today?”
Taking a deep breath to steady my nerves, I place my napkin over my uneaten plate and steel my face toward my worried wife.
I’m sorry baby, please forgive me!
“I can’t do this anymore.”
“Do what?” She scrunches her face in the most adorable way.
Taking my finger, I wave it back and forth between us.
“This.”
“W-what?”
“This. We are not working.”
Her eyes are frantically roaming all over my face, but I keep stoic.
Never showing any weakness. That’s the first thing I learned in Law School.
My heart is breaking right now as I watch her whole demeanor deflate.
Her hormones have been all over the place lately and I hate to be the cause of any of this right now.
“I was having doubts the morning of our wedding but thought it was just nerves. I really wish I’d listen to Dr. Jordan about being engaged longer instead of rushing things. It was my bad.”
The silence is deafening and I’m not sure how many minutes pass before she speaks but it feels like hours.
“Is this some kind of joke? Levi, this isn’t funny.”
Don’t make me have to get nasty, baby. Just get mad then storm out.
“There’s no joke. I want out. This isn’t something that is appealing to me anymore.
I liked my old lifestyle better.” I shrug like it’s not a big deal and toss back the rest of my drink and signal to the waiter for another.
She sits there in shock as I take another sip of my newly poured drink, and try my damnedest to appear bored with this subject.
“Isn’t appealing anymore? What the fuck’s that supposed to mean?” Her voice raises, and I see people taking more notice of us. I knew this might be harder for her, to be blindsided. We’ve been so happy lately and there haven’t been any warning signs for this to occur.
I’m sorry baby. This is the only way.
“Our lifestyle. It’s just not enough now. I tried, but I’m not fulfilled. Blaire was right in that I needed way more than you could ever give me.”
Please forgive me for saying that horrible woman’s name.
“So, spanking the shit out of me isn’t enough for you!” she spits back and now I know we’ve drawn a crowd. I’m pretty sure the meter maid heard her.
“Saylor,” I growl in warning. “Watch yourself. I know that this is shocking but remember who you’re speaking to.” The lump in my throat only gets bigger and the acid in my stomach is burning my esophagus.
Just walk out, baby, then it can be over, and I don’t have to keep going.
Her tears have flooded down her face and I think that she’s about to get up and leave, but then something crosses over her face.
A look of resolve, almost. Like a light bulb moment going off.
She looks around the room and sees that all eyes are on our table.
Saylor furiously wipes her cheeks with the backs of her hands.
Her face hardens as she faces me again, and the glow she always has is missing.
There is a fire that has been ignited in her that I’ve never seen before.
I can handle her feisty side but this is something else completely.
Maybe this wasn’t the best idea to do this in public.
“You know what? You are nothing but a coward! You hide behind your expensive cars, yachts, and position in the community but you’re a coward,” she spews.
She points her delicate, perfectly manicured nail in my direction.
“Now, here we are not even six months later, and you want out.” Another look of resolve flashes over her eyes. “Fine, have it your way.”
She goes to stand, and I can see her struggling to straighten up because she is shaking. My instincts say to go to her and embrace her trembling body, but my mind is telling me that this is all part of my plan.
“You truly are the heartless bastard everyone talks about, but I thought it was because they just didn’t know you.
Today has shown me how blind I’ve been to that.
You let those years dictate the rest of your life.
Yeah, you had it rough, but there are others out there in the world who had it a lot worse than you did, and look what you did with it.
Most people don’t land families like your aunt and uncle, and they end up on the streets.
Not some three-story mansion with private schools and luxury vacations.
Instead of fighting for a better way to overcome it, you decided to help keep those people out of prison so they can do more damage to innocent lives, just like your dead parents let their drug dealer do.
” She tosses her napkin on the table then bends to grab for her purse.
There is a lump in my throat and I want to say something but the words are clogged.
“All that money in your bank account, along with a decade of therapy, and still you can’t get a clue or come to terms with it.
You work in a field that you despise just to please a family that should love you no matter what career choice you make.
Ask yourself, after years with that escort woman, were you able to feel loved?
Have meaningful relationships with people your age?
” She’s ticking a finger off on each argument and making my head spin as she puts me in my place.
No one has ever spoken to me this way before, not even her.
I feel heat on the back of my neck as she’s calling me out.
Each sentence is like a whip slashing across my skin, ripping me to shreds.
Saylor snatches her phone off the tablecloth and jams it down into her open purse.
“The answer to all those questions is a big fat NO! For a smart man you sure are a dumbass. We were together, but for only a few weeks, and everyone told me what a different man you’d become—kind, caring and even started acting your age.
I’m sorry no one was there for you growing up but I’m here.
I thought we were moving forward in a loving relationship. ”
My chest is burning at her words, as if she’s stabbing my heart with an ice pick, and I want her to stop but I’m frozen in place. I’ve never heard her speak like this before. Especially about my dead mother and father. Shit, she just aired out all my dirty laundry that only a few people know about.