Chapter 7
SEVEN
AIDEN
I peel my eyes open to the sunlight pouring in from my window.
I look at the clock on my nightstand and am pleasantly surprised to see that I actually slept through the night. It’s rare for me to sleep more than three to four hours at a time. The internet says it has something to do with unresolved trauma and…
I shake when shivers start to race through me. This isn’t a good way to start the morning. The sun is shining bright, the ground outside is covered with fluffy snow. Even the fucking birds are chirping with the promise of a new day, and so should I. Even though I tell myself that, my thoughts are brought back to the bizarre dream I had last night. It wasn’t a memory, which I’m thankful for, but I don’t think that’s any better.
It was dark and I was in a cave? I think it was a cave. The walls were damp and it smelled like mildew and dampened earth. I cried out for help and it echoed around me. There was something in the shadows, something in the depths that rang like the sounding of a bell. Instinct made me run, my bare feet padding through the ground, cutting and slicing me with every step. I fell at one point into broken glass, shards of it sticking through me, and the pain was immeasurable.
But then the first drop of blood on my cheek startled my fear away. It rained blood . Putrid and thick, heavy as it coated every inch of me. A sinister laugh slithered into my ears from a distance. It curled around me like a constricting viper trying to suck the life out of me. I gasped, choking on blood, begging for relief.
And then it was over.
After that it was a dreamless sleep, like being trapped in a void, until I woke up however many hours later.
I’m not sure what the message was, or if there even was one to begin with, so I push it aside like I do everything else. There’s no use dwelling on the things I can’t control… or the things I want to hide from.
I throw my legs over the bed, stretching to try and breathe some life into me when I notice it.
I’m… I’m covered in cum.
Drying cum that sticks to my boxers and makes a disgusting crunching sound when I stand. I’m almost ashamed of myself. I haven’t had a wet dream since… Well, I’ve never had a wet dream before. Sure, I’ve woken up hard like any average guy, but I’ve never actually come in my boxers before. I touch myself gingerly, wondering why the sensation is so strange, like I’m privy to something I shouldn’t know. Like it’s almost wrong to feel my soft cock and wonder what possessed it to do this.
I bite away that pressing feeling of dread as I strip, dropping my boxers into the hamper before entering the shower. I make sure to avoid looking in the mirror as I do. It’s not that I don’t like the way I look, but I’m just not comfortable facing myself, I guess. The water is icy as I turn it on, but I welcome that feeling. The sting where you feel your teeth chattering until you almost can’t take it wakes me up, knocks me out of whatever daze I’m in.
Today is going to be a good day. I’ll make sure of it. I’ll do all the things I normally do to feel like my very best self. I’ll grab my knitting kit and head to the park, sit under my favorite tree, and just take in the sun. Even on a snowy day, I know it’ll be peaceful and quiet. Maybe I’ll even see a happy family that’ll cheer me up. Myybe I’ll even figure out where Zeus went. That cat can be the greatest little shit every now and then, but I’m sure he’ll turn up.
I know that I can outrun the memories and the monsters who live in them as long as I try my hardest.
Because I don’t want to know what will happen if those same monsters catch up.