Chapter 46
FORTY-SIX
LEVIATHAN
All I feel is pain.
It’s not because of the knife that rips off one of my fingernails or the razor-lined collar around my throat that digs deeper into my skin every time I swallow.
Aiden .
He’s gone.
This level of agony is unimaginable. It’s like everything that once made me, me, has been taken away. I’m left as nothing but a hollow shell without purpose, without a point to live, and the torture at Asi’s hands is the universe’s sick joke. Because without Aiden, there’s no reason to be alive, but my suffering is what matters to my tormentor.
“I want you to know I don’t like this but someone needs to make you fall back in line.” He turns, wiping the bloody knife on his apron as he clicks his tongue at me. “You really fucked up this time.”
“Kill me,” I beg, watching as he rifles through the instruments on his tray, searching for his next toy. “Just kill me.”
He snorts, picking up a set of rusty pliers. “What kind of punishment would that be?”
I gulp, tears falling down my face as I sob. “He’s gone.”
Asi nods, coming to stand in front of me. He yanks my jaw down with one hand and smiles. “Open up, brother.”
I don’t even scream as he digs around in my mouth, settling on one of my back molars, and yanking it out in one go. The metallic tang of pools of blood rushes down my throat, making me choke on something I’ve always loved.
I’m not even mad at him. He’s not Asi right now. He’s Asmodeus, the beast within who’s taking sick and perverse pleasure at inflicting pain upon me. But, again, the pain I feel isn’t coming from him.
He’s gone.
I promised Aiden I would follow him to death, but I’m still here. Here in this dark and sterile room after fuck knows how many days have passed.
I tried to kill myself when I first got here. I had hoped that if I bit down on my tongue hard enough, I could choke on it. Gore caught on and gagged me before I could go through with it, and I’ve been on some twisted form of suicide watch since then. When Asi isn’t here playing with me, there’s a rotating schedule of my brothers here, all making sure that I don’t do anything stupid.
Bel and Gore have tried to cheer me up, doing ridiculous shit to ease my suffering, almost apologetic, but it hasn’t worked. Asi plays with me whenever he comes in, as per his own compulsion. But Mammon just stares.
Those blue eyes pierce mine and I find myself watching him, specifically focusing on the hands that took the life of my little lamb.
I wish I could just die.
“You know, I don’t really understand what happened,” Asi begins, dropping my tooth into a metal tin with a clank. “He was just a bounty, Levi. A sacrifice. He was never yours to keep. You must have known that.”
At one point I believed that, and I curse myself now that I spent so much time thinking of him only as a sacrifice when he’s…
“He was my everything.”
“He should have been nothing to you,” Asi snarls, reaching into my mouth yet again. “This isn’t who we are. This obsession of yours will fade and, when it does, we’ll finally let you free.”
To this, I actually chuckle as he rips out another tooth.
So many regrets. So many things I wish I had done and said. So many things I should have learned long ago.
I hope that Asi grows to love someone. I hope that he finds happiness only for it to be ripped away from him. I hope the pain of betrayal burns him alive. Only then would he understand what I’m feeling.
I snort, shaking my head. “You’ll be waiting forever.”
“Ridiculous,” he mutters with a roll of his eyes.
“What did you do with his body?” I find myself questioning. I hope they didn’t just toss him in the wilderness like all the others, letting the scavengers feed off his remains like a piece of trash. “Where is he?”
“That’s none of your concern.”
The metal door creaks open as the rest of my brothers step in. Where Bel and Gore would typically be living for the chaos, they seem a little reluctant as they take their spot against the wall. They whisper to each other in hushed voices, but I don’t pay attention to them. All I focus on is Mammon and the smooth way he saddles up beside Asi and looks at me like a lab specimen. “How’s he doing?”
“He’s probably going to be here for a while,” Asi sighs. “The bounty really did a number on him.”
“ Aiden ,” I hiss, hating how he’s reduced to nothing. “His name was Aiden.”
Gore wrinkles his nose in confusion, eyes darting between Asi and I. “Um, what do you mean was ?”
“Mammon killed him,” I spit, fighting against my restraints as I look at my oldest brother. “You fucking killed him!”
“Yeah,” Bel draws, cocking his head. “No, he didn’t.”
I think they’re kidding—another sick way they can derive pleasure from my tragedy—but when Bel and Gore continue to stare at me in confusion, and Asi doesn’t chime in, I realize they’re telling the truth. I can’t help it. I sob. As Mammon unlocks the chains that were holding my arms above my head, I cry in relief. My Aiden is alive. In what state, I don’t know, but he’s okay. The relief I feel will never be felt by anybody. I’m almost paralyzed by it.
I turn to Asi, pissed beyond belief at the twisted lies he told me. “You sick fuck.”
He shrugs. “I told you he’s no longer your concern.”
“If you can’t do the task you’ve been given, one of us will instead,” Mammon says, holding out a towel for me to wipe my mouth with.
Rage bubbles within me. This whole thing is so fucking stupid. They’re going to kill Aiden. For what? A ridiculous sacrifice concocted by some withering old man?
“And who said that? It’s not your decision, is it, Mammon?” I taunt, smirking at the way his jaw twitches. “The man you call Master?”
“Watch it,” Asi hisses, hands clenching around the pliers.
It’s at this moment that I realize I’ve had enough. Enough of all this bullshit. Enough of following the rules of a man all of us barely know. I’m doing this to save Aiden—to get my little lamb back—but I’m also repulsed at the idea of seeing my brothers act like nothing but sheep to the slaughter. “No, you fucking listen to me. We’re brothers, Mammon. You, me, Bel, Gore, and Asi. We were raised together. Things don’t need to be this way.”
And it’s then that it truly sinks in. I’ve been betrayed. Death doesn’t faze me, violence is welcomed, but this —my brothers turning on me—is a bitter pill to swallow. I knew my brothers wouldn’t care about my feelings for Aiden or my decision to keep him alive. I know that but experiencing it first hand…
I shake my head, dragging a hand across my tender mouth. “I thought we were loyal to one another.”
Out of the corner of my eyes, I see Bel and Gore share a worried look. Almost like freaky fucking twins, they both chew on their bottom lips and turn to Mammon. Gore reaches for him first. “What’s he saying?”
Mammon settles them by raising a calming hand. “He’s talking nonsense.”
“Is it nonsense?” I look at my youngest brothers. “Gore, Bel, who was there for you when you were twelve and had chicken pox and needed someone to take care of you?”
Gore gulps, reaching for Mammon’s hand. “You and Mammon.”
“Who makes sure you always have leftovers if you miss dinner?”
“Asi,” Bel says, worrying the inside of his cheek.
I see the doubt in their eyes, so I press. “Are you telling me that nobody sees anything wrong with this picture?”
Gore latches onto Mammon’s side, wrapping his arms around his center. “I don’t like this.”
“Cut it out, Levi,” Bel barks, rubbing the back of Gore’s head. “You’re upsetting him.”
Asi growls at me. “Master?—”
I snort. He wants to talk about Master? Well, if he wants to play it that way, I’ll indulge him happily. “See, you can’t even call him your father, Asi. What has he done for us that we haven’t done for each other?”
Mammon, who had started off silent, clicks his tongue at me, although there is a spark of interest in his eyes. “What you’re saying is dangerous, Leviathan.”
“And I don’t give a shit. I’m done.” I throw my hands in the air as a laugh bubbles up my throat. “I have a new owner now and—you know what—he’s earned that title.”
Gore turns to Bel, eyes wide as he tips his head back and forth. “Without Master we all wouldn’t be together.”
Bel shakes his head. “Don’t listen to him.”
“What do you think this is going to accomplish?” Mammon asks, petting Gore’s hip when he starts to tremble. “What’s the point?”
I scoff. “I’m saying think for your-fucking-selves. Do you actually want to kill Aiden?”
Mammon takes a second and shrugs. “I don’t really care if he lives or dies.”
Gore pokes at his side, uncertainty dancing in his eyes. “Um… I like him.”
“He’s so good for you, Levi,” Bel admits, smiling softly. “It’s like watching a puppy beg for scratches.”
“Look what he’s doing!” Asi screams, laughing almost manically as he gestures at me. “He’s turning us against each other!”
Bel frowns. “Jesus Christ. Have a heart, Asmodeus.”
“A fucking heart?” He spits, growing more and more frustrated. “ This isn’t who we are. We’re not going to sit here in a fucking circle and talk about… what? Disobeying Master.”
Bel and Gore are slowly turning to my side. I can sense it. Mammon… I don’t know about him, but I’m certain I know how to make Asi crack. I level up to him, bumping my chest against his as I smirk. “Call him what he is, Asi. He’s your father.”
Asi’s lips curl. “Shut up.”
“Why? I thought you were fine with the fact that he raped your mother to knock her up with you.”
He digs his fingers into his hair, shaking his head. “Stop talking.”
“He doesn’t give a shit about you!” I press, slapping the side of his head before turning to the rest of the room. “About any of us!”
“Mammon,” Asi groans, squeezing his eyes shut. “Make him stop speaking.”
“You’re nothing to him, Asmodeus! When’s the last time you actually talked to dear old dad? Oh, wait. He likes Mammon more than he likes you?—”
I’m tackled onto the floor before I can finish my assault. Asi lunges at me, his silver knife produced from his pants as he holds it against my throat. He looks absolutely gone, but at the same time, so very lost. It’s like he’s revisiting his life, looking at it from a different point of view, and hating what he sees. The usual emotionless, apathetic robot is gone.
“Do it,” I hiss, craning my neck up so the knife digs into the skin above the collar. “Do it if you believe that old bastard would ever choose any of us over himself.”
He grits his teeth, raising the knife high in the air, but he stutters when attempting to bring it down and strike me. He screams—loud and pained—as he throws the knife across the room. “Fuck!”
He slides off me, bringing his knees up to his chest, and curling into a ball. He doesn’t sob, but he does rock back and forth, mumbling to himself like the psycho I know we all are. I lean forward and place a hand on his shoulder, comforting him. “We’re all each other has, Asi. The only people we should be loyal to are each other.”
“Finally. You took long enough.”
Both of us look up at Mammon, a self-satisfied grin on his face as he sarcastically claps his hands. He looks… pleased, almost like he’s in on a joke none of us have ever heard. Asi and I aren’t the only ones who are lost. Bel and Gore look at each other before deciding to just shrug and hug themselves to Mammon’s side.
I, unlike them, am not a fucking simp for our oldest brother, so I’m annoyed. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
Bel sighs in relief, placing a hand on his heart. “Okay, thank God I’m not the only one who doesn’t get it.”
“You’ve always been smart, Leviathan,” he starts, stepping away from our youngest brothers to help Asi and I to our feet. “All of you are. But what you all lack the ability to do is see the big fucking picture right in front of you.”
I think all of us take offense to that but none of us say anything. Why would we have stopped to take a step back and examine anything? Especially when Mammon’s always spoken for our false master and molded us exactly how he wanted us?
When none of us say anything, he chuckles, running a hand through his blond hair. “Jesus, I see I have my work cut out for me.”
Gore blinks up at him. “What do we do?”
“Yeah, tell us, Daddy,” Bel teases sarcastically, but he can’t suppress his curiosity.
Barely able to hide his fondness for those crazy-ass fuckers, he pets the top of both of their heads, before turning that devious grin to me.
“I have a plan.”