Chapter 6
Chapter Six
The weekend at Lex’s parents’ house was fun.
We mostly hung out in his room, fooling around.
I know I said I only wanted to have sex with him one time, and then we agreed that one time could be the one weekend.
Now that we’re back at school, I need to put a lid on this before he thinks I’m going to turn into some clingy chick he has to avoid.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” I say when we reach my dorm room door.
“You don’t want to invite me in?” Lex asks.
I laugh. “We shouldn’t. We didn’t want anything to change, remember? And we’re back at school now.”
“Okay. Well, if you do change your mind and need my services, call me. I don’t mind being your booty call, Addi.”
“Good to know.” I smile at him. “Thank you… for… you know.”
“You don’t need to thank me, Addi. It wasn’t a hardship,” Lex tells me. “See you in the morning.”
I quickly open my door, walk inside, and close it behind me. I can’t wipe the smile off my face. I was right. Giving Lex my V-card was the smart decision. He’s my best friend, and that’s a memory I will never look back on and hate.
Just as I push away from the door, there’s a knock. “Did you forget…” My words trail off when I realize it’s not Lex knocking. “Can I help you?”
“Yeah, I think you can,” Jameson says. He’s the jock Lex got pissy about the other day at lunch.
“What?” I ask him.
Jameson walks into my room, pushing me backwards.
“What are you doing? Get out!” I scream but then his fist swings in my direction, hitting me in the side of the face, and the last thing I hear is the door being slammed shut.
Everything hurts as I start to wake up. I’d hoped it was a nightmare. But the pain in every bone of my body tells me it wasn’t. I grit my teeth as I force myself to get up and walk into my bathroom.
The reflection in the mirror is one I’ve seen on my mother more times than I care to remember. I made a promise to myself that it would never happen to me. That I would be smarter than she was. And now, here I am. Looking just like she does most weeks.
I shower again. I’ve already taken three showers but it’s not enough.
I throw on a pair of sweats and one of Lex’s hoodies I stole from him a few months back and pick up my phone. I could call him. He would be here. He would help me. He would also take one look at me and kill the person who did this.
I can’t let him see me like this. I can’t derail his life. I’ll get over this eventually. I’ll be able to move on. But if Lex does something, he’ll get kicked out of school. He won’t get into college and it will ruin his future. I refuse to be the thing that ruins him.
My phone dings with a message.
Lex:
Where are you? You weren’t at breakfast.
Me:
Something’s come up with my mom. I had to leave school. Talk later.
Lex:
Want me to come with you?
Me:
God no. The last thing I want is for you to see where I come from, Lex.
Lex:
I don’t care where you come from, Addi.
Me:
I’ll call you when I get home.
It’s a lie. I have no intention of calling him. I have no intention of ever coming back to this school. Slowly, I pack all of my clothes into the one duffel bag I arrived with. I leave my books. I’m not going to need them.
I’m about to walk out when I stop. I can’t just leave without saying goodbye to him. Walking over to my desk, I rip a piece of paper out of a notebook and write a letter to Lex. I know he’ll eventually come looking for me.
Folding the paper in half, I write his name on the front and then stand. I’m not going to cry. I’m going to get the hell out of here, and when I get back home, I’ll think about what happened to me.
Four hours later, I’m back at the trailer park I never wanted to see again. I open my mother’s door, praying she’s alone. Thankfully, I find her sitting at the dining table by herself and looking oddly sober.
“Mom?” I question.
“Addison?” My mom’s eyes roam up and down my body. “No.” She shakes her head. “No! What happened? This wasn’t ever supposed to happen to you.” She stands and comes over to me. When her arms wrap around my back, I finally let the tears go. I finally let myself fall apart.
“Shh, it’s going to be okay,” Mom says, but it’s not.
How am I ever going to be okay? Not only have I ruined my chance of getting into college, I’ve lost Lex. The one good thing that I had in my life. And what hurts the most? The fact that he’s going to hate me.
“You want to talk about it?” Mom asks, taking me over to the small dining table. “Sit down. I’ll make you tea.”
“Tea?” I repeat. My mom’s go-to drink is usually cheap-ass wine.
“Tea. I’m sober, Addison,” she says.
“For how long?” I question, not really believing her. I begged her to get help for years, but she never wanted to be sober.
“I went to rehab, after you left.”
“You didn’t tell me,” I say.
“My problems were never meant to be yours, Addison.” She gives me a pitying look. “Have you seen a doctor?”
I shake my head.
“We’ll go to urgent care.”
I nod. Because as much as I don’t want to see a doctor, I know I need to.