Chapter 6
Chapter Six
Emerie
After Damien leaves, I make sure the door is locked and turn off the outside lights before I carefully go through the house and close all the blinds. He thinks I’m kidding about the folklore around here, but I’m not. I don’t leave my blinds open at night, and everything is locked up tighter than a tick once it gets dark. I don’t answer my door if I hear strange noises, and I don’t respond to knocks on my door, both of which have happened since I’ve been out on my own.
“Maybe I should tell him some of the legends we have around here,” I muse.
Once I’m satisfied that Levinia and I are safe for the night, I change into some pajamas then return to the living room with a glass of wine so I can go through the box of things Levi left for me. I might not be old enough to drink yet, but Miriam bought me a bottle of blackberry merlot one day and after trying it, it’s my go-to when I need something a little bit stronger. Giggling, I realize she’s my wine dealer. I grab the remote and find something mindless on for background noise, then lift the flaps, gasping when I see what’s inside.
“Oh, Levi,” I whisper, reaching in to pull out a composition notebook.
When we were kids in school, we’d start a new ‘note’ at the beginning of the school year, then pass the notebook back and forth. Since it looked like what we were using in class, we were never caught. I still have all of them because Levi said I was the keeper of the secrets.
“I still am,” I say out loud as that memory hits me.
There are only two notebooks, likely started when he left for basic training, so I set them aside to read when I’m in bed. Reaching back into the box, I pull out a flat package wrapped in tissue paper that’s kind of squishy. Carefully tearing it open, I start giggling when I see the T-shirt that says ‘My boyfriend’s a Navy SEAL’ on it. Leave it to Levi to find something like that to send to me. Of course, it’s the size I wore before I got pregnant with Levinia, and even though I lost my baby weight, my boobs never went anywhere so it would probably be too tight. Still, it would be cute to create a shadow box with, so I set it aside.
It takes me another thirty minutes to make my way through all the little treasures he left me, and by the time I’m repacking the box, tears are soaking the top of my nightgown. Sighing a little at how emotional I am, I pick up the notebooks, grab my glass to take back to the kitchen, then shut out the living room light, using the one over the stove as a nightlight to guide me through the house. One last check on Levinia to make sure she hasn’t tossed off her blankets like she normally does, and then put her stuffed panda bear back on the bed and I’m heading to mine.
* * *
“Dear Em, today’s the first day of basic training and while I’m stoked as hell, I’m also nervous. What if all the training I did wasn’t good enough?”
“Well, I survived Hell Week and met this guy, Damien, who is fucking awesome, Em. We’re so much alike that the guys who are in our squadron swear we already knew each other!”
“Em, I miss you so damn much. I keep thinking about our future. I know you still have to graduate, but that’s not too far off. I can’t wait until I see you when I come home to take you to your prom.”
I don’t read all of the entries, I honestly can’t since my eyes are swimming with tears and my cheeks are soaked. He dredged up so many memories of us growing up and I know it was because he was homesick and missing all of us, but it’s hard to remember the way it used to be and think about how it should’ve been. Instead, I tuck them into my nightstand drawer, get up and wash my face, then head to bed. Maybe tonight wasn’t the best night to read anything from Levi, especially after the long day at work then on the rig, but I honestly couldn’t resist touching something that he touched.
* * *
Eight o’clock sees me at the inn picking Damien up before we head toward Maggie Valley. While there are a lot of outdoor activities in the area, they’re not easy to do with a three-year-old, so I opted for things that I knew Levinia wouldn’t get bored doing, while also letting Damien get a feel for the kind of things we do in this neck of the woods.
“Do you want to hit up Possum Creek’s diner again or find something in Maggie Valley?” I ask.
“Diner, Mama!” Levinia exclaims, causing Damien to chuckle.
“Sounds like the princess has spoken,” he teases. “The diner’s fine, Emerie. I’m sure we’ll be eating again today, and we can catch something in Maggie Valley then, okay?”
I shrug while maneuvering toward the diner. “The diner in Maggie Valley is pretty good, too, but she’s partial to this one for some reason.”
“No worries,” he replies, smiling at me.
Flustered, I focus on my driving so I don’t have to examine the feelings coursing through me. I know I’m still alive and I also know from something Levi put in the first notebook that he doesn’t want me to go through life alone.
“Em, if something ever happens to me, just know that I left this world loving you. I don’t want you to mourn me forever, either! You’re young, beautiful, and the best person I know. Find love again, sweetheart, or I’ll figure out how to cross the veil and haunt you until you do!”
“Are you okay?” he asks.
“Yeah, I um, opened the box, as you know, and Levi had two composition notebooks inside. I read part of one of them and something he said crossed my mind.”
“I’m willing to listen if you need me to,” he offers. “In fact, I have to admit, there were times I was jealous of you because you got to know so many other sides of him that he didn’t freely share with the rest of his teammates.” He blushes then adds, “Not that side of course, but the one where he could be less serious and more easygoing if that makes sense. We were always in battle mode for lack of a better term.”
I know he can’t say much about any of their missions simply because of who they were to the Navy, so I simply nod. “I was kind of jealous that you got to be with him at the end,” I whisper.
He clears his throat several times and I see him swipe below his eyes. Reaching over, I grab his hand and squeeze it. “I’m sorry for bringing that up,” I tell him, grateful that Levinia is focused on the song on the radio so she’s not paying attention to us.
“No, it’s okay. You… you were the only person on his mind at the end,” he says, glancing back at Levinia. “He said… he said to tell you that he loved you more than all the stars in the sky, and he was sorry he broke his promise to you because he wasn’t coming home.”
I can’t help the tears that start to flow at his words and I’m grateful that we’ve just pulled into the parking lot at the diner because otherwise, I would’ve probably wrecked my car.
“Mama, why are you crying?” Levinia asks, suddenly back with the two of us as the car has stopped and is parked.
“I told her something your daddy wanted me to,” Damien admits. “How about I help you get out, Levinia, and we’ll go get the best table in the diner while your mama has a few minutes to herself.”
“Thank you,” I whisper, reaching into my console for some napkins to mop up the tears that won’t stop flowing down my face. “Vinnie, you know what I like to drink, can you order it for me, please?” I ask, my voice slightly stronger, which isn’t saying much at all.
“Yes, Mama! Come on, Damien, let’s go,” Levinia replies, bouncing in her carseat.
He swipes a finger down my cheek and says, “I’m sorry I caused this.”
“No, it’s not your fault. I promise it happens at random times, even all these years later,” I tell him.
* * *
Thankfully, I was able to calm myself and we ended up having an absolute blast in Maggie Valley. I don’t think I’ve laughed so much or so hard in a very long time. Both of us have taken countless pictures and several times, Damien stopped strangers to get them to take one of the three of us.
“Today was a lot of fun, Emerie,” Damien says as we leave Maggie Valley’s Candy Valley Enterprises after spending a good portion of the day in the Wheels Through Time Museum. He’s got several bags of candy that he said he ‘had to try’ as well as souvenirs of our adventures, including pictures of us playing miniature golf. My SUV also holds other treasures we’ve both found as we meandered our way through some of the small stores. Most of them are familiar to me since I live in the area but seeing Damien’s enjoyment made it far from boring.
“I had a good time too,” I admit, carrying Levinia, who has exhausted herself. “I think she did as well.”
He chuckles before saying, “I should carry her and let you get the bags. Here, let’s swap.”
Without conscious thought, I hand over my daughter, brushing back the wispy curls from her sweat-dampened forehead, then take the bags from him. “Hmm, you might’ve gotten the better deal,” I tease, acting like the bags are heavier than Levinia, which causes him to laugh.
“She’s a beautiful little girl, Emerie,” he tells me as we make our way to my SUV.
“I’m pretty fond of her,” I state, giggling. “Even though for the first six months I thought I was gonna go out of my mind. She was a night owl, which worked well for my shift, of course, but then she had colic. Nothing I did and none of the tricks my mom or Miriam gave me worked.”
“How did you get her to finally settle?” he asks as he gently puts her in her carseat then gets her buckled in, all without her waking up.
“Totally by accident, actually. Miriam had one of Levi’s old stuffed animals, and one evening, she was watching her while I was at work, and she was straightening his room when Levinia started screaming. She ran to pick her up and still had that panda bear in her hands and as soon as the baby felt it against her arm, she calmed down. Any time Miriam tried to move it, she started up again, so we let her have it.”
“Huh,” he murmurs. “But he never even knew about her, right?”
I shake my head as I move to get into the driver’s seat. “No, I would’ve told him in my next letter, but we got the notification of the accident first.”
He reaches out and clasps my hand in his. “I’m so sorry, Emerie. I know I’m a piss-poor substitute for him, but I hope you’ll let me visit again in the future.”
Taking a deep breath, I lace our fingers together and face him directly. “I think I’d like that but more importantly, I think he’d like that. One of the things we did as kids was write notes back and forth in a composition notebook, and I partially read through the ones that were in the box last night. Over and over, he stressed that if something ever were to happen to him, he wanted me to find love again and be happy. Not that I’m saying this is love or anything like that,” I quickly amend, my face heating up in embarrassment.
“Well, while it’s far too soon to say anything like that, I will say I do like you, Emerie, and would enjoy getting to know you better. If something comes out of that, well, it just means he’s still trying to meddle in my life, at least.”
I giggle because today has been full of all things Levi with regard to their conversations, stuff they did while in training, how Levi would tease him about finding someone like ‘his Emerie’, deciding when they finally got out, they’d live in the same state, if not the same town. I briefly wonder if he’s considering moving to Possum Creek since he said he’s at loose ends now that he’s been medically discharged.
“He definitely liked those he cared about to be happy and content,” I reply.
Once we’re back at the Possum Creek Inn, I pull in but don’t shut my car off since Levinia’s still sound asleep in the back. He leans in and asks, “Can I kiss you, Emerie?”
“I think I’d like that,” I admit.
When his lips touch mine, a sensation unlike anything I’ve ever experienced runs through me. Even though Levi and I had a good relationship, I have found myself wondering if we would’ve stayed the course and gotten married, or if we would’ve grown apart. This electrical zap has me suspecting we probably would’ve remained friends throughout our lives but found someone else to marry.
The kiss isn’t too long and it’s not too short; it ends up being just right, even if it leaves me wanting more. “Breakfast again tomorrow?” he asks, his voice huskier.
“Yeah, that sounds good to me,” I manage to say.
“Thanks for a good day today, Em. I honestly wasn’t sure how receptive you guys would be to me coming here,” he admits.
“Well, if you’re gonna be around, you’re gonna have to learn to say y’all because ‘you guys’ is far too Yankee sounding,” I tease.
“You’d be okay with me being around, say in Possum Creek even?” he asks.
“I’d be more than okay with that, Damien,” I reply, leaning in and kissing the underside of his jaw. “Now, I better get Little Miss home before she turns into a pumpkin or something. Don’t forget your bags in the back and we’ll see you in the morning, okay?”