Chapter 5
With a spring in her step, Jen took the stairs quickly and rushed into the living room. Today, she was feeling alive. Today, she was hopeful of life after prison. God, Suzanne had really been amazing last night, and Jen couldn’t wait until the next time they saw one another. She wouldn’t push a second date, but she was definitely ready for one. They’d hit it off far too well for any other outcome.
“Morning, love.” Jen’s mum crept up behind her and kissed her on the cheek. “How was last night?”
“It was great, Mum.” Jen knew she was wearing a ridiculously huge smile, but she didn’t care. She hadn’t had much to smile about for a long time. “She…wants to see me again.”
“Of course she does. I’d expect nothing less.” Denise busied herself in the kitchen, pottering about as she usually did first thing in the morning. “You have the day off, don’t you?”
“Yeah. Not sure what I’m going to do with myself yet. I thought I might go for a run.” Jen rested back against the counter, smiling when her mum handed her a cup of tea. “Thanks.”
“I’ll be leaving for work around midday. I’ll be home by nine, though.” Denise worked at a local restaurant. It was something to keep her busy since Jen’s dad had died ten years ago. “Maybe you could come in, and I’ll treat you to your dinner.”
“Oh, that’s okay. I’ll sort myself out here. I thought maybe a quiet night in with the TV would be good for me. It’s been a busy week, and I’m back at work tomorrow. Only half day, but still.”
“That sounds like a wonderful evening. Wish I could join you.” Denise patted Jen’s cheek as she passed her by and moved into the living room.
“Hey, Mum?” Jen followed, clearing her throat as Denise turned to her. “Could I borrow some cash? I’ll pay you back when I get paid next week.”
“Jen.” Denise gave her a knowing look. “You don’t need to borrow cash from me. The money from your dad is still there. I haven’t touched it.”
Jen shook her head. “I told you that’s yours. After everything I put you through, I don’t deserve it.”
“Are you alive and healthy? Are you in a better place than you were?” Jen nodded in response. “Then you do deserve it. You lost your way, you’ve done your time, and now you’re home. The money is there. It belongs to you. He left it to you .”
When Jen’s dad had passed away, he’d left them all a chunk of money each via his life insurance policy and will. When Jen hit the bottom, her mum convinced her to transfer it out of her account. The twenty-five grand still sat in one of Denise’s savings accounts five years on.
“I probably owe you more than what’s even in the account. I told you to keep it for yourself. It’s all I can offer you.”
“I’d rather you used it to set up your future. I’d rather you spent it on yourself.” Denise motioned for Jen to sit down on the couch beside her. “Punishing yourself forever isn’t going to help you move on, Jen. Treat yourself to a new wardrobe. Buy yourself a little runaround car. Go on bloody holiday. Do something with it, please.”
“It wouldn’t feel right.” Jen cast her gaze on the carpet. “I don’t feel like I deserve it.”
“Okay. What did you want to borrow money for?”
Jen wasn’t sure if it would be too much, but she wanted to thank Suzanne in some way for last night. “I wanted to send my date some flowers.”
“Well then, I’m going to transfer some of your own money to you. Maybe you could arrange dinner with her sometime. Treat her and yourself. You do deserve it, Jen. You’re picking yourself back up. Don’t deprive yourself of happiness.”
“I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Jen leaned in and hugged her mum. Deep down, Jen knew she would have to allow herself some happiness eventually. Her punishment had been and gone. Jen just wanted to live again. “And if you’re sure, I’ll accept the money.”
“No need to accept it, love. It’s yours, and it always was.”
Jen nodded as she sat back and sipped her cuppa. Maybe if she could show Suzanne that she was financially stable-ish, then when the truth came to light, it wouldn’t be so bad. “Any idea if or when I should tell her yet?”
“Just enjoy yourself with her. I wouldn’t be hasty in any decisions right now. Be yourself, and I’m sure she’ll love everything she sees.”
Jen was capable of finding love. She was capable of being the perfect partner for someone. That would never change, no matter what her past involved. She had always been a romantic at heart, and if she had her way, she was going to romance Suzanne hard. “I do really like her. She’s older, but maybe that’s exactly what I need. Someone who isn’t going to lead me astray, you know?”
“If you’re happy, I’m happy.” Denise squeezed Jen’s knee and then rose to her feet. “I’ll take care of that bank transfer while you pick some gorgeous flowers.”
As Denise left the room, Jen sighed. Was that a hint of contentment she felt? Huh .
While she didn’t need someone else to complete her, Jen would admit to feeling on top of the world today. Wasn’t life a funny thing? Just yesterday, Jen couldn’t be bothered to leave her bed. But this morning? Oh, this morning, she felt like an entirely different person.
As she sighed contentedly, her phone buzzed in the middle pocket of her hoodie. It wasn’t often her phone alerted her to anything. Not many people had her new number.
Thank you for the perfect date. I’d love to see you again x
Jen grinned to herself as she reread the message over and over again. Suzanne had initiated contact, and now, Jen didn’t know how to respond. Maybe she would take those flowers over there herself instead of sending them.
Thank you for being the perfect date. You let me know when you want that second date. Dinner is on me x
With the strangest sense of peace, Jen lowered her phone to her knee and rested her head back on the couch. Maybe she would rejoin the gym and get herself back in shape. If she was going to use the money her dad had left her, she should use it for her wellbeing first and foremost.
Suzanne lowered her pruning shears to the floor and took a seat on the doorstep. She hadn’t expected such good weather today, but it was certainly helping her garden early this year. Spring seemed to have appeared out of the blue. Your focus has been elsewhere . Suzanne smiled. She should have been doing this at the weekend, today was supposed to be a working day, but she couldn’t focus on work. Whenever she sat down at her desk, all she could think about was Jen’s hand high up on her thigh. Those delicate fingers stroking her skin. Jen’s lips as they reminded Suzanne of happier times. Jesus, that woman could kiss.
She sipped from her water bottle and allowed herself a moment to feel content. Everything seemed brighter today. Life was certainly looking up. She hoped Jen felt the same way. It was unusual for Suzanne to find a connection so suddenly, but she meant what she’d said to Jen last night. She deserved to find love again. It always helped when the woman you were on a date with was so easy to be around. Suzanne wasn’t the type to become anxious at the idea of a date, but she hadn’t known it could be so easy. She also hadn’t imagined that Jen would be looking for something a little more serious than a fling.
She’s not fling material, and neither are you.
Suzanne knew that without a doubt. There was something about Jen that made Suzanne want to sit up and listen. When she gave over her attention, Suzanne found it hard to look away from Jen. Tracy may suggest that Suzanne needed to explore and date for a while, but she knew what she wanted. And it was Jen. Why deprive herself of that? Why push down the feeling she had around her when it was so good? No, it was time to focus on what she wanted. Not everyone else.
Suzanne took her phone from her pocket and brought up Jen’s response from earlier. Was tonight too soon for those dinner plans? Probably.
I can be available to spend the evening with you whenever you want x
She hoped she didn’t come across as desperate, but Suzanne doubted Jen would think that of her. They’d both gone further than expected last night, so Jen was clearly eager to get this show on the road just as much as Suzanne was.
While she stared down at her phone, waiting for a response, her garden gate creaked open. When Suzanne looked up, her breath caught in her throat. “Hi.”
Jen stared back at her from the edge of the garden path, holding an arrangement of flowers. “Hey. I just wanted to drop by with these for you.”
Suzanne got to her feet and approached Jen. My goodness. It was one hell of a bouquet. “These are for me?” Jen nodded. “But why?”
“A thank you for being the perfect date. But mostly because you seem like the kind of woman who deserves flowers on a whim.”
“That’s incredibly sweet. Thank you.” Suzanne took them from Jen’s arm and kissed her on the cheek. “I wasn’t expecting this at all.”
Jen shrugged. “I can be romantic when I want to be.”
Suzanne sighed. “God, it’s been so long since I had any romance in my life.”
“Me too.” Jen nudged her shoulder as she smiled back at Suzanne. “You feeling okay today?”
“Me? Of course. Why?”
“Just checking in. I think last night was unexpected…in more ways than one. So, I wanted to ask.”
How in the name of God had Suzanne found the courage to flirt with this woman…and come away with a date? Jen was adorable. “I’m feeling very good. Today feels…different. I feel different.”
“Different, how?”
“I don’t quite know how to explain it, but when I find the right words, I’ll be sure to let you know.” Suzanne hiked a thumb over her shoulder. “Did you want to come in?”
Jen held up her hands. “No, that’s okay. I’m not here to gate-crash your day. I just wanted to drop the flowers off and say hi.”
Suzanne really wished Jen would have agreed to come inside. It was refreshing to find someone who took an interest in her and how she was feeling. It was even more refreshing that it was someone twenty years younger than her. So far, things were looking good with Jen. “I don’t have any plans. I decided to work in the garden while the weather was cooperating. If you wanted to stay for lunch, we could move things to the back garden…”
Jen hesitated, but only briefly. And then she smiled as she nodded. “Okay. That would be lovely.”
“Come on in.” Suzanne stepped through the door, closing it once Jen was safely inside. “Let me put these gorgeous flowers in water, and then I’ll make lunch.”
Jen followed Suzanne through to the kitchen. Suzanne felt Jen’s eyes on her, a tingle working its way up her spine. These were the things she had missed. Someone who watched her every move. Someone who wanted her. Judging by last night, Jen definitely wanted her.
“No plans for your day off?” Suzanne glanced over her shoulder and smiled in Jen’s direction. “Or do you just prefer to rest since you’ve been driving around all week?”
“I’m not very good at sitting still. I prefer to keep busy. I’m thinking of getting back into the gym. It’s good for my mental health.”
Oh, my . Suzanne could only imagine how ripped Jen was going to be. She already had an impressive physique, and that was with clothes on. “I enjoy running. Some yoga too.”
“You know, I’ve never really given yoga a go. Ruby was obsessed with it, but I’ve never felt as though it was for me. Maybe I should give it a try.”
“You’re welcome to join me whenever you like.” Suzanne meant that, but it was mostly the idea of seeing Jen in some interesting positions that had her extending the invitation. “No pressure, obviously.”
Jen wrapped a hand around the back of her neck and smirked as she dipped her head. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea. Not yet.”
Suzanne frowned as she turned to face Jen fully. “No?”
“It was a struggle keeping my hands to myself last night. The thought of seeing you in your yoga pants is not something I could contend with. I’d cave within seconds.”
A thrill rushed through Suzanne at that. Jen really was interested, huh? “Maybe that’s my plan.” Suzanne stalked towards Jen, noting the look in her eyes as she did so. Jen was already conjuring up the image in her mind. “But I don’t know. I think you have good self-control. You seem like that kind of person.”
Jen’s cheeks reddened, but she still reached forward and took Suzanne by the hand. “I did have an amazing night with you last night. I hope you know that.” She pulled Suzanne in, their bodies pressed together, and drew her into a kiss. One hand settled on Suzanne’s waist, the other gently gripping her jaw. Fuck, she hadn’t been kissed like this in what felt like forever. Jen pulled back a little and licked her lips. “I don’t really know what’s happening here, I just know that I want to see more of you whenever I can.”
Suzanne touched her forehead to Jen’s, admiring those hazel eyes. “I also don’t know what’s happening, but I’m not scared of where this is going. I don’t plan to slow down or stop and think. Life is too short to spend more time worrying and less time having fun.”
“You’re exactly my kind of woman.” Jen stole another kiss, nipping at Suzanne’s bottom lip. “Life is absolutely too short, and I think you and I know that all too well.”
Suzanne grinned. Her days with Jen in her life were about to become very interesting. “So, yoga sometime then?”
“Seems it’s time to test out my self-control.”