Chapter 38 Jesse
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
Jesse
I’m halfway through a cup of coffee when Ivy’s name pops up on my phone. It isn’t too strange for her to call me at this time of night, but for some reason, my blood runs ice cold.
“Iv—.”
I barely even get her name out.
“Jesse, it’s Olivia… she’s in the hospital,” Ivy says, and just hearing the words hits me as a sucker punch to the gut.
My hand freezes on the phone. I’m not sure if it’s my head or my chest that’s suddenly tightening, but I feel the panic creep in fast. “She passed out. They think it’s from stress. Please come pick me up. Now. I need to get there, and I need to leave the guys with the kids.”
“Wait, what?” The words come out sharp because my brain hasn’t caught up with what she’s saying. “What the hell do you mean by passed out? Is she okay?”
“I don’t know yet, just get here,” she demands, and I can practically hear her anxiety buzzing through the phone.
I don’t even think about it; I hang up, toss the coffee aside, and sprint out the door.
I throw myself into the truck as fast as if I’m in a damn race.
Ivy’s words keep bouncing around in my head: hospital, passed out, stress. Livvy doesn’t collapse. She’s not the type.
I’ve seen her go through hell at work, seen her put everything she has into running that damn coffee truck. Stress doesn’t make her crumple. But something’s happened. I don’t know what, but I’ll figure it out.
The engine roars to life, and I peel out of the driveway, barely registering how fast I’m driving.
The streets blur under the headlights, snow flurries swirling like little ghosts in the cold night air. My hands grip the wheel tight, knuckles white. I’m holding it together, or at least I’m trying to.
When I pull up to Ivy’s house, I don’t even give the truck time to stop before I jump out fully. Ivy’s standing by the front door, already in a hoodie, eyes wide and filled with too much fear.
I barely give her time to open her mouth before I ask, “How is she? Do you know?”
“She’s stable,” Ivy says quickly, but there’s no calm in her voice. “But… she’s been running on fumes for weeks, Jesse. I knew she was stressed, but I didn’t know it was this bad.”
I see the way her hands are trembling, even as she tries to mask it with a deep breath. I feel the same way. I can’t say it out loud, but I should’ve noticed that she was falling apart, too.
“Alright, let’s get to the hospital,” I say, flatly, trying to hold it together for her, even though I’m about to lose it.
Ivy nods, a shaky exhale escaping her lips as she follows me to the truck.
The drive to the hospital is dragging on forever. The streets are quieter than they should be, the headlights of other cars casting long shadows on the snow-covered roads.
I can’t stop thinking about Olivia. I imagine her face in that hospital bed, pale and weak, and the fact that she’s been carrying all of this on her own. She’s always so damn strong. I never imagined it would break her.
“I feel bad,” Ivy murmurs beside me as we go. “I’ve been too distracted to be a good friend to Olivia.”
I shake my head hard. “No way. You have four kids to look after. You can’t do everything.”
The hospital lights burn bright against the night sky. The parking lot’s half empty, just a few cars scattered here and there. As I park, I glance over at Ivy, and her face is a mix of worry and exhaustion.
“Let’s go.”
We move fast through the halls. Ivy keeps her head down, and I keep mine up, eyes scanning the sterile walls, waiting for them to give me answers. The place is so damn quiet it feels wrong. It’s not where I belong. It’s not where Olivia belongs.
Ivy stops in front of a room. The door’s cracked just enough to make my stomach flip.
“She’s in there,” Ivy says.
I nod and walk past her, but my legs might as well be made of stone. I’ve been in a lot of shitty situations in my life, but nothing prepares you for seeing Olivia in a hospital bed.
The world’s stopped, I’ve stepped into another dimension. She’s pale, too still, and there’s an IV hooked up to her arm. It hits me harder than I ever thought it would. She looks fragile. The person who can take on the world is finally showing the cracks I’ve been too dumb to notice.
I swallow hard and step inside, trying to keep it together.
Olivia stirs a little as she hears us. Her eyelids flutter open, and for a second, she’s confused, disoriented. But then her gaze finds mine, and there’s a flicker of recognition, followed by a weak smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes.
“Hey,” she says, barely above a whisper.
I sit down beside her bed, trying not to let her see the way my hands are trembling.
“Hey,” I reply, rougher than I intend. “What the hell happened, Liv?”
She gives a tiny shrug, but she’s too exhausted to try for much else. “Just… too much, I guess.”
Karl steps into the room, his usual easy-going nature is gone as he clutches a cup of ice chips, presumably for Olivia. He looks serious and tense, and his eyes are darting between Olivia and the two of us.
“I’ll give you the rundown,” Karl says, directed mainly at Ivy. “She passed out, and I wasn’t sure what was wrong, so I brought her right here. After running tests, the doctors said her body’s been in overdrive for too long.”
Olivia sighs and closes her eyes for a moment. “I didn’t want to worry anyone.”
“Is this because of that asshole boss of yours?” Ivy growls as she takes a seat beside Olivia. “It’s all got too much for you, I just know it.”
This sucks.
Not only do I not know much about this, but I also can't even comfort Olivia the way I want to because Ivy is right here.
I can’t hold her hand, can’t brush her hair out of her face, can’t even make her laugh the way I usually do to lighten the mood. I’m stuck, standing on the edge of something I’m too scared to dive into.
Every time I look at Olivia, there’s a part of me that knows this isn’t just some temporary thing. I care about her more than I’ve cared about anyone in a long time. But the situation feels impossible.
How can I tell Ivy that I’ve fallen for her best friend? And that it isn’t just me, but Karl and Leo as well. Especially after the way I reacted when I first found out about her with my best friend and the twins.
I’m drawn to Olivia in ways that scare the hell out of me. I’m crossing lines that I never thought I’d be willing to cross, and I’m doing it right under Ivy’s nose. The more I try to stay away from her, the less I can.
As Olivia and Ivy talk, I’m left stewing in my own thoughts.
Where does this even go? What is this?
Where can things go if we’re not willing to be honest? If I am so desperate to keep things locked down that it all just crumbles and falls apart…
I try to focus on Olivia, but the thoughts keep spiraling out of control. I steal a glance at Ivy, who’s sitting beside Olivia’s bed, holding her hand as she tries to reassure her.
Her concern is genuine, but it’s also loud. Every moment she spends here makes me slip farther into this mess.
Karl’s talking too, and I can hear his words, but it all feels distant. I’m not sure if I’m hearing it all or if my head is spinning.
“Visiting hours are almost over,” the doctor says, creaking open the door as she looks at Ivy and me with a polite but firm expression. “I’m sorry, but we need to wrap it up. But we’ll be discharging Olivia soon.”
Ivy looks up, visibly frustrated, but nods. She doesn’t want to leave, but she doesn’t argue either. I can see how much this is weighing on her.
“Alright,” Ivy says softly, squeezing Olivia’s hand once more. “We’ll go. But give me a text when you get back, so I know you’re okay.”
Karl nods. “I got her. I’ll take her back, okay?”
“Thanks, Karl,” Ivy gasps. “Call us if you need anything.”
Olivia’s smile is small but sincere, though it doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “I’ll be fine. I promise.”
Ivy looks at me, her eyes filled with something between worry and guilt. “Let’s go, come on.”
Ivy walks beside me as we make our way to the parking lot. I can almost feel the strain radiating off her in waves.
The moment she slides into the passenger’s seat, the words start coming out of her mouth.
“Oh, Jesse, I feel like shit,” she groans. “I know life is busy now, and that I’m wrapped up in the kids, but seeing Olivia in that way and knowing I missed the signs. I mean, I’ve been trying to help, getting Sloane to help and everything, but it still sucks. I want to do more.”
I know how she feels. Only… my life isn’t too busy for Olivia. I’ve just been too scared of the consequences to admit how I feel. And yeah, I’ve helped with the apartment, but seeing Olivia sick… it’s not enough.
By the time I pull up outside of Ivy’s home, I could throw up. Truly.
But the sight of Freddie, Mitchell, and Timothy all waiting for her to come home, to comfort her, tugs at something else.
Shit.
I want that. I really want that.
I want to be the one who makes Olivia feel safe. To stand there with Karl and Leo, waiting for her, offering her the support she’s never had from anyone except us.
I want to help her rebuild her life, piece by piece, and I want to be there when she needs it most.
I glance at Ivy before she steps out of the truck. She’s looking at her guys, her eyes softening as she sees them, her shoulders relaxing just a little. They’ll take care of her. I know they will.
But the sight of them, together, as a family, as a team, makes something inside of me ache.
I need to be brave. I need to step up for Olivia the way I should have from the start. It’s time to stop running from what I want, what we all want.
But how do I make that leap?
I watch Ivy walk toward her family, the tension in her movements slowly dissipating as she meets them halfway. They’re already reaching for her, pulling her into their arms, and for a split second, I’m an outsider. I’m too late.
It doesn’t have to be too late, though, right?
I can find a way to make this work. I’m sure of it. I just need to… figure it out, that’s all.