Chapter 34
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
I woke up at five the next morning and used the guest bathroom to shower off the lingering traces of sex. Propping myself against the glass, I drank coffee and stared out the big window at the river, dimly illuminated by city lights before sunrise.
There hadn’t been any cuddling last night. We’d had sex on his desk after he demanded I stay. Then he’d turned on a basketball game and started cooking—a paella with shellfish and an arugula salad with nuts and fruit. I’d worked on my laptop, editing one of my book review videos, and drinking a glass of wine. We hadn’t talked much at all.
Rinsing out my coffee mug in the kitchen sink, I didn’t understand how I could seesaw from falling hard for him to not being sure I should be there… Ready to end it? Ha. The man I’d had a glimpse of in Eugene was the one I wanted to be with.
I left before Dominic woke, munching on one of his apples as I took the elevator down to the parking garage. That early, it was an easy drive back to River Gorge. I had a couple hours before work would start—I didn’t have an access code to enter the accounting building early anymore.
My shoulders tight, I drove to my townhouse and parked across the road. There wasn’t a car in the driveway, and all of the upstairs lights were off. The yard had oak leaves coating it like a blanket, and the driveway pavement hardly showed.
I texted Autumn that I was there and had a call back a moment later.
“Good morning,” she said. “How does it look?”
“Like no one’s here. And messy.”
“I’ll get something scheduled for next week. Are you inside?”
“No.” I couldn’t force myself to go in. Don’t be stupid. Wait until you aren’t alone.
“Good. Stay safe.”
I lingered over the early morning special at a cheap diner, watching a morning show on an old flat screen mounted crookedly to the wall. An email came in from the couple renting a room on their lavender farm. They wanted to meet me. I messaged back right away, offering to stop by after work.
There were more than a few side glances and outright stares at work. I kept a cardigan on over my tight sweater even though it was too warm. Trying for a serious appearance, I put on my blue screen glasses—which looked like grandmotherly reading glasses. My desk was too empty, and I had to wait for Valerie before I could log into my work computer.
Lori came in a bit late and I almost did a double take. She wore a short skirt and bright evening-style makeup—which looked good on her but was a sharp change from her previous professional style and stood out in our somewhat conservatively dressed office. She raised her eyebrows at me before I glanced away.
No one talked to me all day. Not that I tried to speak to anyone myself. I kept my head down and worked through lunch, busy catching up on all of my accounts.
Maria called as I walked out the door. “I saw your messages—congratulations. Tell me you’ll come out to celebrate with me?”
“I’d love to, but I’m going to look at a room for rent.”
“Well, you have to eat sometime. And sleep on my couch. It’ll be fun. Anyway, Pippa is expecting you.”
“Thank you, I’m headed over now.”
“So, how are things with Mr. Big?”
I laughed. “If only I had Carrie Bradshaw’s shoes.” There certainly was plenty of sex in the city between Dominic and I. “Things are confusing but also really good. How are you?”
“Ugh—not enough details. I’m the same mess as last week. Come have a drink with me at seven. Please?”
“Not sure, I’ll text.” I unlocked my car. There hadn’t been a peep from Dominic all day, but I had implied that I’d stay with him again that night. It would be tough to do that drive later in the evening.
“Fine.” She hung up—harsh for Maria.
I hung my head and covered a yawn. It was a day for being in the doghouse with everyone. Lori glanced at me as she stalked by, a little wobbly in her high heels, with her phone to her ear. Slumping, I rubbed my chest. Gerry had changed the way I dressed, too.
At Maria’s, Pippa met me in the driveway with her arms open for a hug. I went into them very willingly.
“So,” she said, squeezing me in tighter, “are things any better?”
“Yes.” I smiled at her as she leaned away to look at me, still gripping my arms.
She nodded. “I can see it in your face. Come here if you need us. You’re part of this family now.”
“Thank you.” I blinked hard. “That means so much to me.”
She patted my arm. “Maria misses you. But such is life. Let’s get your things.”
I was able to cram nearly all of my clothing into my car. Even though they were all rumpled, I breathed easier with my work wardrobe at my fingertips.
The thirty-five-acre lavender farm was situated on a lovely country road about ten minutes out of town. The farmhouse was decorated with chrysanthemum flowerpots, pumpkins, gourds, and garlands of red and gold leaves. A couple in their early sixties, the Roberts, met me on the porch with a pitcher of lemonade and an elderly dachshund that flopped down on top of my feet when I petted her.
They showed me the small, simply furnished attic bedroom, and we chatted about what I did for a living and my schedule. It was a more cheerful version of my parents’ house, with flower bouquets and gingham tablecloths.
We returned to the porch, and Mrs. Roberts sank into a rocking chair, folding her hands in her lap. “Well, dear, I think you’re a good fit. The only thing is, I don’t think you’ll be here long.”
Mr. Roberts cleared his throat. “You are young. This is a, uh, one-person bedroom.”
I nodded. “I completely understand and won’t have anyone staying the night here.”
“Right.” Mrs. Roberts smiled at me. “We’ll email you soon.”
In my car, I checked my phone. There were several texts from Maria telling me she could leave the shop early to meet me. Am I a shitty friend?
I called Dominic. He picked up after several rings. “Hi,” he said. His deep voice rumbled in my belly. “How was work?”
“Hi. It was a little awkward. A relief not to have my ex there. How are you?”
There was a good amount of noise where he was at, including a screaming child. “Grocery shopping. Are you headed back?”
I pulled my necklace away from my throat. “Actually, my friend Maria wants to meet for a drink.”
“But you’re driving.”
“Yes—I’ll have an iced tea or something. See you around eight-thirty.”
“Fine.” He hung up.
I stared at my phone for a moment. Was he angry with me? Gerry hadn’t liked it when I went out with friends either. My stomach twisted—yet another sign that Dominic and I weren’t right.
The pharmacy and gift store Maria managed for her parents was situated in an old section of downtown, next to clothing boutiques and little restaurants, one of the last independent pharmacies in the state. The big store window displayed toys, candies, flowers, and unique River Gorge gifts—it was one of my favorite places to find a gift and card.
“Kelsey,” Maria shouted as soon as I walked through the door, bells tinkling. She ran around the display tables and threw her arms around me. “Give me five minutes. Lucinda Osborne came in—grandkid birthdays.”
“Of course. I love browsing in your store.” Even if I didn’t have two nickels to rub together.
After she was done, we walked half a block to a barbecue place Maria loved and took our place at the end of the line. “My treat,” she said. “Their pulled pork is pure heaven.”
“Thank you. Someday soon, I’m going to take you out.”
She bumped me with her elbow. “Don’t worry about it. How was the lavender farm?”
“Doable. Like a kinder version of my parents. As long as I’m perfectly well behaved and chaste, they’ll put up with me.”
Maria snorted. “Oi. Not something I’d be capable of.”
We put our order in, then found an open table and a rack of barbecue sauce bottles. The aroma of meat roasting had my mouth salivating. “I’m looking forward to this too much,” I said. “Dominic’s a pescatarian—I feel bad eating meat around him.”
“Wow. Is he a health nut?” She took a drink of her frosty pint of dark beer.
“Definitely.” I took a sip of my lemonade. “I like it.”
“Things are going well?”
“Can’t tell. He’s…a little moody, I guess. And doesn’t talk much.” I swirled a napkin around on the table. “It’s—well, probably naive of me—or maybe arrogant—but I feel like he needs me. Like, if I can get through the rough patches, he’s worth it. Because of the connection we have. Except, right now, he’s shutting me out, and I don’t know what to do… Sorry, I’m rambling on.”
Maria shook her head. “Are you kidding? I live for this kind of analysis.”
I chuckled. “I’m not any good at it.”
“Sounded fine to me.” She drummed her fingers on the table. “You’re a bit like Persephone and Hades, without the kidnapping. He’s sullen and brooding and needs you to crack open his darkness.”
“Lord of the Underworld? He does have a nightclub.”
Maria cocked her head. “That’s right. Have you seen it yet?”
“No. He’s basically a hands-off financier.” I stirred my drink. “He’s against having kids.”
“Oh, no.”
“I wasted so much time with Gerry… I’m not sure I’ll keep seeing Dominic.”
“Wow.” Maria sat up and took a sip of her beer. “Huh. You don’t think he’ll change his mind?”
“I don’t want to end up trapping him into something he doesn’t want.”