Chapter 41
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
T he Tribune formally apologized to Dominic and removed the story. They published a glowing follow-up article about him, with an interview from the server who’d been allegedly harassed. She said she’d asked Dominic for help with a manager pressuring her to go out with him. The manager, now fired, was the one to spread the false rumor.
I didn’t want to see anyone and spent far too much time in bed. A week passed, and suddenly, Thanksgiving was days away.
“Okay, that’s it,” Maria said when I finally answered one of her calls. “We’re doing a girls’ night, and I won’t take no for an answer.”
“I don’t know, I think I’m fighting something.”
“Psht—it’s called depression. I’m leaving the shop soon and will pick up pizza. It’s Saturday, and it’s too yucky outside to do anything downtown. Bring your pajamas and stay the night.”
“Are you sure?” I blew my nose.
“Yes. My couch is actually comfortable—I wake up there all the time.”
“I feel like I’m always taking advantage of your generosity. I hate being so broke—I’m so sorry…” You’re a useless leach, aren’t you?
“Oh, my God. Stop. Wait—are you crying? No, it’s okay. Come keep me company. I’m going to make you the best cup of hot cocoa you’ve ever tasted. Put on about four layers, dash to your car, and drive to my apartment. There’s a key under the frog statue if you beat me. Okay?”
“Yeah.”
The Roberts shot concerned glances at me as I passed them on my way out of the house. I waved and tried to smile.
I did beat Maria to her apartment and busied myself tidying her kitchen as a thank you for dinner. Until the end of the month, I was perilously close to broke. It was four days until Thanksgiving, and I was struggling to find a way to pay for Tilly’s bus ticket up.
Maria bustled in, a frigid breeze blowing in behind her. “Whew—snowflakes out there. Shouldn’t be much, I heard. Wow, thank you for the clean kitchen. Okay, my turn. Look at these pizzas. Take some and go get comfortable.”
“How’s your week been?” My appetite stirred as I pulled out a hot slice covered in vegetables and sausage.
“Too quiet. Phoebe is down in Arizona, the lucky princess. What’s happening with your townhouse?”
I slouched on her barstool. “Nothing. Autumn says it will take time, especially with this weather.”
“Well, dang. What are your holiday plans?”
Swallowing, I moved my plate a half turn. “Not sure. My older sister usually does something—but they have colds. Her wife’s a schoolteacher. I’ll probably join the Roberts out at the farm.”
“Come here for Thanksgiving.” She grinned at me, plopping down on the other barstool. “With your younger sister, right? I already spoke to Pippa.”
“Are you sure your father won’t mind?”
She waved a hand around. “It’s fine. They like to make it a party—my brothers, a few cousins, friends. Dress up and come.”
“Thank you.” I smiled. “I’ll check back in with you and make sure it still works in a couple days.”
She clinked glasses with me. “It’s a done deal. Don’t worry about preparing anything. Well, you could bring a dessert if you feel the burning need. I’d love an apple pie.”
My chest squeezed. I’d avoided anything to do with apples all week. “Done.”
We settled in front of the television, and Maria, bouncing a little, put on the first episode of a show about elves that had just been released. I pulled out my phone and texted Tilly.
Me
Two Thanksgiving party invites so far. Are you off work?
Tilly
Yes, thank the universe. And I can catch a ride to Portland Wednesday afternoon. I’ll try for the bus out to River Gorge. Yay!
Yes!
How are you?
I’d let her know Dominic was out of the picture. She’d been a little sad but said she understood.
Me
Really tired all the time. Hopefully it passes soon.
Tilly
Pregnant? I read an article about the signs and kept thinking about you.
I startled. The thought had occurred to me, and I was late for my period. However, it wasn’t that likely. I took the pill every day without fail.
Unlikely.
You should go to your doctor. They do the blood tests there. That’s what the article said.
I’ll do a pee test.
Do it.
Right now? It’s snowing.
Okay. Soon. Text me right away.
I set my phone down. The television screen flashed with a complicated fight scene, and Maria leaned forward, her eyes large. My fingers drummed on the couch.
Twisting my necklace, I stood up and brought my plate into the kitchen. I washed and put it away.
“We can watch something else,” Maria called.
“No, it’s good. It’s just…”
“What?”
“I’m going to run to the store. For a pregnancy test.”
“Holy shit.” She jumped up, then bent over to grab the remote and paused her show.
My heart beat hard in my chest. “I, um, have been wondering about it a little. And my period’s late. I think it’s time to see.”
“Let’s go.”
We went to a grocery store. I scanned the cashiers to see if I knew anyone.
“I’m getting wine.” Maria veered off to the liquor aisle.
I found a test and went to the checkout counter with a bored-looking teenager. She raised her eyebrows but didn’t say anything.
Maria and I rushed back to the car, putting our hoods up as snow cascaded down in a thick cloud. I pulled out slowly, windshield wiper blades squeaking. A shopping cart shot out of nowhere. My wheels fishtailed in the parking lot as I jerked the steering wheel and avoided hitting it.
“Dang,” Maria said, gripping the handle above her seat. “Mr. Nelson did that—pretending like he doesn’t know he almost hit us. Phew. At least hardly anyone’s on the road.”
“I’m sorry. This is stupid—I should have waited.” My hands ached from gripping the steering wheel so hard.
“Nope. My gut says it’s right. You need to know.”
“Thanks.” I blew out a breath, turning to start the climb up to her house.
“Have you heard from him?”
“No.”
She sighed. “Is that him respecting your wishes do you think?”
“Probably.” I pumped the brake at a stop sign. “He was angry, too.”
“I’m going to stop talking until we’re back inside. Almost there.”
After I parked, Maria grabbed a broom out of the garage and started sweeping snow off her steps. “Go ahead. Do the thing.”
I went into the bathroom and carefully followed the directions on the pregnancy test box. Breathing too fast, I left the stick on the toilet lid and went out to the kitchen.
Maria came in. “Hot cocoa time.”
“Yes.”
Leaning on the wall next to the window, I stared out at the white flakes landing on houses and sidewalks, illuminated by a streetlight. There was a strange mixture of terror and hope churning inside of me.
“Do you want to talk about him?” Maria handed me a steaming mug.
I shrugged. “He’s probably moved on already.”
She huffed. “Doubt it.”
“When we started sleeping together…” I cleared my throat. “He didn’t want to use a condom.”
“You’re on the pill.”
“Right. Except my cousin got pregnant while on the pill—on her honeymoon. It should have been basically safe. I’d assumed he’d pull out…to be extra cautious.”
“Yeah.”
“He didn’t. I was in a weird head space—and had a feeling about it. Almost…hoping for a baby.” I covered my face. “I’m so stupid.”
She rubbed my back. “No, you’re human. Did you ever talk about kids?”
“He doesn’t want them.”
“Huh. Maybe he doesn’t know what he wants. You’ll tell him of course. The man has plenty of money.”
I sucked in my bottom lip. “Well, I don’t know. Not right away.”
She blinked at me. “Why?”
“It might not take. And…I don’t want to force it on him.”
“All hypothetical.” She drank her wine. “Should I look at the stick?”
“Yes.”
She ran into the bathroom. I closed my eyes, holding my hands together in front of my face, not sure what I was praying for.
“Hey, come look at this. I can’t tell.”
I sprang up and went to bend over the toilet with her. Two lines meant pregnant, one line meant not. There was one very clear line. Next to it was the faintest hint of another.
“Can’t tell if that second line is a shadow…” Maria turned on her phone’s flashlight.
I collapsed against the doorjamb, fanning my face. “I’ll go see my doctor.”