Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
EMMA
T he taxi ride back to my apartment passed in a blur. Lila kept up a steady stream of chatter, filling the silence with updates on mutual friends and funny stories from her latest event. I was grateful for the distraction, even if I couldn’t focus on her words. My mind was too busy playing a greatest hits compilation of ‘Ways Emma’s Life Is About to Implode.’
As soon as we stepped into my apartment, the dam broke. I collapsed onto the couch, burying my face in my hands as sobs wracked my body.
“Oh, honey.” Lila wrapped her arms around me. “It’s going to be okay. We’ll figure this out. And if we can’t figure it out, we’ll fake it till we make it. That’s gotten us this far, right?”
That only made me cry harder. Sure, that philosophy had worked with our businesses, but with a baby?
The optimistic euphoria I’d felt at the hospital after hearing the baby’s heartbeat had worn off on the way home. Now I was left with exhaustion and my strategic mind, trying to poke and prod my life into some semblance of normal.
It refused to acknowledge that it would never be normal again. All it cared about was my promise to myself, if I was keeping the baby, it needed to make sense of how it fit into my world, but there was a roadblock to that.
I couldn’t stop my business unravelling, put more money in my account or change the fact that I was about to be a single mother and raise a baby with a support network of one. Lila would help in any way she could. I knew that with certainty, but I also wasn’t the type of person who liked to complicate other people’s lives. My aunt would be no help and considering I barely remembered my parents, part of me feared that all I knew about parenting came from my aunt.
Yet another reason I’d always sworn I wouldn’t have kids alone.
I’d had this totally unrealistic plan to find a man who had the perfect normal, stereotypical upbringing. The happy childhood, with two parents who loved each other and them and would move heaven and earth for their child.
I understood my thinking — find a man who would know how to be the parental figure and then learn from them — but none of that had ever happened.
And now I was alone. All of the responsibility of raising a normal, fully functional human on my own. What if I couldn’t pull it off?
I cried until I had no tears left, clinging to Lila. When I finally lifted my head, her shirt was damp with tears.
“I’m sorry,” I sniffled, gesturing at the wet patch. Usually, I had my emotions locked down. “Must be the hormones. Or the crushing realisation that my life is spiralling out of control.”
She waved off my apology. “Please. What are best friends for if not to be human tissues?”
That startled a watery laugh out of me.
Lila patted my hand. “Now, why don’t you go splash some water on your face, and I’ll make us some tea? Then we can talk about... everything. And by everything, I mean how we’re going to turn this unexpected plot twist into the best damn story ever.”
I nodded gratefully, hauling myself off the couch and shuffling to the bathroom. The face that stared back at me in the mirror was pale and drawn, eyes red-rimmed from crying. I splashed cold water on my cheeks, trying to pull myself together.
When I emerged, Lila stood in the kitchen with the kettle whistling on the stove. I joined her and happily sank into the familiar routine of making tea — picking out mugs, choosing our favourite blends. It helped ground me a bit. It was nice to know that even when your world is turning upside down, some things stay the same.
I reached for my usual mug, then hesitated. “Wait, can I even have tea? Is caffeine bad for the baby?”
Lila’s eyes widened. “I don’t know. I’ll Google it.” She whipped out her phone, fingers flying over the screen.
My stomach churned, and not from morning sickness this time. How many cups of coffee had I downed in the past ten weeks? I’d practically mainlined the stuff, especially on those long nights prepping for weddings. And the espressos... oh god, the espressos.
“Okay, so it looks like caffeine isn’t great during pregnancy,” Lila said, still scrolling. “They recommend limiting intake.”
The mug slipped from my numb fingers, clattering on the counter. “Limiting? I’ve been guzzling the stuff like it’s going out of style!” My voice rose, panic creeping in. “I had three shots of espresso today to get through the Perier wedding. And don’t even get me started on how much coffee I’ve been drinking to fight off the exhaustion.”
I sank into a kitchen chair, my head in my hands. “I’m already failing at this mother thing, and I haven’t even given birth yet. What if I’ve hurt the baby? What if?—”
“Em, breathe.” Lila cut me off, her voice firm but gentle. “You didn’t know. And one day of too much caffeine isn’t going to hurt the baby.”
“But it wasn’t just one day,” I whispered, the guilt washing over me. “It’s been weeks. I’ve been so focused on work, on keeping everything together, that I didn’t even notice…”
“Hey! Look at me.” She crouched in front of me. Her dark curls framed her face, her blue eyes filled with concern and determination. The freckles across her nose, usually hidden under makeup, stood out in the harsh kitchen light. “You’re going to be an amazing mother. You know how I know? Because you’re already worried about doing the right thing. That’s what good parents do.”
I met her eyes, wanting desperately to believe her. “But what if?—”
“No what-ifs,” she said firmly. “From now on, we’ll make sure you’re doing everything by the book. I’ll even drink decaf with you in solidarity. Deal?”
Despite everything, I felt a small smile tugging at my lips. “Deal.”
As Lila bustled around, brewing a caffeine-free herbal blend, I took a deep breath. This was just the first of many changes, I knew. But maybe it could be okay. With friends like Lila, maybe I could handle it.
A few minutes later, we settled back on the couch, steaming mugs in hand. She fixed me with a gentle but determined look.
“Alright. Spill it all.”
I took a deep breath, wrapping my hands around the warmth of the mug. “I’m about ten weeks along. I have this condition that causes extreme morning sickness.” I pulled a face. I still didn’t fully understand what that meant. Hopefully, the pamphlets would clear it up. “They want me on bed rest and I have to reduce my stress levels. Because apparently, the universe decided that running a business wasn’t challenging enough. I needed to do it while confined to my bed like some Victorian heroine with consumption.”
“What about the father? Please tell me it’s not that guy from the speed dating event. The one who thought ‘entrepreneur’ meant he sold homemade slime on Etsy.”
I winced, knowing this question was coming. “It’s Charlie.”
Her eyebrows shot up. “Charlie? As in, the hot Hollywood agent you had wild monkey sex with at that celeb wedding? That Charlie?”
“The one and only,” I said, unable to keep the bitterness from my voice. “It was just supposed to be a one-night stand. We were careful, I swear. I don’t know how this happened. Maybe it’s karma for all those times I rolled my eyes at bridesmaids complaining about their dresses.”
“Well shit.” She blew out a breath.
“My thoughts exactly.”
“What are you going to do?” Lila set her mug down, turning to face me fully.
The million-dollar question. I’d been avoiding thinking about it since the doctor dropped the pregnancy bomb.
“And before you say ‘curl up in a ball and pretend this isn’t happening,’ remember that I know where you hide your spare key.”
Amusement tugged at my lips but quickly snuffed out as the sheer terror of my situation settled anew. What was I going to do?
“I don’t know,” I said, my voice small. “I always thought I’d want kids someday, but not like this. Not when I’m finally getting my business off the ground, not with a man I don’t know who lives on the other side of the country. I mean, what am I supposed to do? Call him up and say, ‘Hey, remember me? Surprise! I’m pregnant, and it’s yours. I know we said it was one night but want to play house and raise a baby?’”
Lila winced. “Yeah, I can’t see that going over well.” She chewed her lip, studying me with a concerned expression. My stomach twisted, dreading her next words. “Have you thought about... other options?”
“I’m keeping it.” I shook my head. “I know abortion is the right choice for some people, but... I don’t think it’s the one for me right now. Plus, knowing my luck, the kid would have grown up to cure cancer or something, and I’d spend the rest of my life feeling guilty.”
“Okay,” Lila said, no judgement in her voice. “Then we’ll figure out how to make this work. First things first — your clients. We need to come up with a plan for them. Because let’s face it, fainting at a wedding isn’t exactly great for business.”
I groaned. “I can’t believe it happened before the first dance. Talk about unprofessional. I might as well have shown up in sweatpants and flip-flops.”
“Don’t worry about that.” She waved my mortification away. “I called your bride while you were getting discharged. She was worried sick about you, by the way. I told her you had a bad case of food poisoning, but the rest of the night went off without a hitch. The hotel staff handled it. As far as she knows, you’re a hero who tried to work through illness.”
Relief hit me hard and I slouched lower on the sofa. “You’re a lifesaver.”
“I know.” She grinned, but it was short lived. “Now, let’s tackle your upcoming events. How many do you have booked? And please don’t say a hundred, because even I have my limits.”
I mentally ran through my calendar, wincing as I remembered the recent cancellations. “I have three weddings in the next month. After that…” I trailed off, my voice catching. “Well, let’s just say my calendar isn’t as full as it used to be.”
Lila’s brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”
I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “Remember that bride I threw up on? Word got around, and I’ve had four cancellations in the past week alone. If things keep going this way, I might not have any weddings left to plan by the time the baby arrives.”
“Oh, Em.” Lila’s face fell. “I’m so sorry. But hey, it’ll blow over, right? You’re amazing at what you do. Once people remember that, they’ll be lining up to book you again.”
I appreciated her optimism, but I could see the doubt in her eyes. She knew as well as I did how quickly reputations could crumble in this business.
“Maybe,” I said, not believing it for a second. “Anyway, I can handle the consultations for the one upcoming wedding from home. As for the rest... well, there might not be much left to handle.”
Lila squeezed my hand. “Don’t worry. We’ll figure this out. I can take point on the upcoming weddings, and if any more come in, we’ll tackle them together. Your business isn’t going down without a fight, got it?”
I nodded, grateful for her support even as dread settled in my stomach. Between the pregnancy and my tanking business, I was running out of options fast.
“Okay.” She blew out a breath. “So maybe five weddings. I can handle that. I’ll deal with the ones next month, and we can reach out to some of the other planners we know to help with the later ones if more come in. You can still consult from home, right? Unless the doctor prescribed a strict regimen of daytime TV.”
I nodded, hope unfurling inside of me. “Yeah, I think so. As long as I’m not on my feet all day, it should be fine. Though I might need you to be my stand-in for venue visits. Think you can handle pretending to be me?”
“Please, I’ve been practising your ‘everything is under control’ face for years. I’ve got this.”
For the first time since my life started to crumble around me, I laughed. Real, genuine laughter.
“Perfect. We’ll set you up with a killer home office — video calls, mood boards, the works. Your clients won’t even know the difference.”
As Lila continued laying out her plan, detailing how we’d divide up the work and rope in reinforcements, some of the tension left my body. This was what she did best — take a seemingly impossible situation and break it down into manageable pieces. If planning a wedding was like putting together a puzzle, she was the person who always found the corner pieces first.
But as she talked about coordinating with vendors and rearranging schedules, a cold realisation washed over me.
“I can’t afford this.”
She stopped mid-sentence, frowning. “What do you mean?”
I gestured around my small but stylish apartment. “This. All of it. My rent, my business expenses... I’ve been barely breaking even as it is, pouring everything back into growing the company. If I can’t work full-time, if I have to pay other planners to take over my events...”
The reality of my situation hit me like a ton of bricks. I’d worked so hard to build my business from the ground up, scraping together every penny to make my dream a reality. And now, just when things were starting to take off...
“I’m going to lose everything,” I whispered, tears welling up in my eyes again. “All those late nights, all those sacrifices... all for nothing.”
Lila was quiet for a long moment, her brows drew together in thought. “What about moving in with me? My place is tiny, but we could make it work. It’ll be just like college, but with more pregnancy hormones and less tequila.”
The offer warmed my heart, but I knew it wasn’t a real solution. “I love you, but your apartment is barely big enough for one person, let alone two and a baby. Plus, you work crazy hours at the gallery on top of wedding planning. It wouldn’t be fair to saddle you with a pregnant roommate and then an infant. You’d end up hating me.”
“Yeah, you’re right.” She sighed, her shoulders dropping. “But there has to be something we can do.”
We sat in silence for a moment, the weight of my situation hanging heavy in the air. Then, almost in unison, we both turned to look at my phone, sitting innocently on the coffee table.
“You know,” she said slowly, “there is one part of this equation we haven’t discussed.”
“No.” I shook my head while my stomach did somersaults that had nothing to do with morning sickness. “Absolutely not.”
“You have to tell him, Em.” She threw me a sardonic look. “And not on the phone. No one drops the baby bomb over the phone. You’d have to go to Los Angeles.”
I stared at her, my mouth hanging open. “Go to LA? Are you crazy? I can’t just hop on a plane and show up at his office!”
But even as I said it, a tiny voice in the back of my head whispered, Can’t you?
It takes two to tango. Why should my life be the only one turned upside down?
Lila shrugged. “Why not? You’re pregnant with his kid. That gives you some rights, doesn’t it? And he could help. Take the worry of medical bills out of the equation at least.”
I groaned, burying my face in my hands. “This isn’t how it was supposed to go. I had a life plan. And nowhere in that plan did it say get knocked up by a Hollywood agent and burn my business to the ground.”
“Plans change,” she said softly. “Sometimes for the better.”
I stared at her, tears stinging my eyes. “How is this for the better? I’m about to lose everything I’ve worked for.”
She scooted closer, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. “Not everything. You’ve still got me. And now you’ve got this little one.” She poked my stomach gently. “And maybe, you’ll have Charlie too.”
I snorted. “Right. Because he’s just going to welcome me with open arms when I show up on his doorstep, pregnant and broke.”
“You don’t know that he won’t. From what you’ve told me, he seemed like a decent guy. And let’s face it, Em — you don’t have a lot of options right now. And just to be clear, I’m not suggesting you move in with him and play happy families. I just think your situation is half his fault so he should pay for at least half of it.”
I hated to admit it, but she was right. I groaned, trying to imagine dropping the bombshell on Charlie. “I can’t believe I’m even considering this.”
I had to tell him.
“What if he doesn’t want anything to do with us?” I whispered, voicing one of my deepest fears. “I don’t want to force him into this. My aunt made it clear every day how much she resented being stuck with me. I can’t do that to Charlie or our baby.”
Lila’s eyes softened. “Then we figure something else out. But you have to give him a chance, Em. You have to give yourself a chance.”
“Okay, I’ll go to LA.”