Like A Moth To A Flame

32. Lucky for you, I got all these daddy issues…

32

Lucky for you, I got all these daddy issues…

Firefly

W hen I woke up the next morning, she was lying beside me.

My eyes flashed open, and I looked at her, and disbelief twisted in my guts.

I gently pulled the blanket down until it whispered down her body, and I could see the gentle rise and fall of her chest as she slept, and smell my scent wafting off her skin. After I’d taken her on the couch, I’d carried her into the shower and washed her. Then, I’d taken her to bed, where she fell asleep almost as soon as she hit the mattress.

Now, she was still here, and she was alive. She was breathing.

There were no shackles restraining her, and no ropes holding her down.

She was here because she wanted to be.

Disbelief sat in a curdled puddle in my gut and it took all of my willpower not to draw a blade across my flesh to prove I wasn’t dreaming. But there was no blood, no pain, and nothing that could wake me from this dream .

There was only her—my angel come to earth.

I watched as she shifted in her sleep, her full bottom lip falling open to reveal a line of drool that had dropped from her mouth to smear across my pillow. She was perfect.

She was here, willingly.

She was real.

I pressed myself against her, gently, careful not to scare her. I’d done enough of that.

I’d done too much of that.

The dark part of me, the part that I couldn’t keep contained, had scared her and hurt her in a way that I never could. The dark part that I tried so hard to swallow back, but it stuck in my throat like a spiked ball that tore at my esophagus and threatened to spill back into the waking world.

That part of me would never go away. I just had to learn to live with him.

I thought back to the words she’d said to me, the ones she spat in disgust when she’d left me rotting in that cage like the animal I was.

“I would’ve fucked you, anyway.”

My lips split in a grin as I stared at her, watching the way her flesh rose in goosebumps when I ran my fingertips across her shoulder and up to the soft, supple skin of her throat.

Would she have?

I had no way of knowing now.

Maybe she would have, after yesterday.

“Put a baby in me, Tommy. Give me a reason to stay. ”

She would have. There was no doubt now. Maybe I wasn’t the only one who was a little fucked up.

I let my eyes roam down her body, down past the freckles on her chest, and the scars on her wrists. I let my sick thoughts roam over the soft swell of her stomach—both perfectly taut and somehow soft enough that I wanted to sink my fingers inside and rip out every little demon that hurt her.

I imagined the way she’d swell when she was carrying my baby and the way her hips would spread and her perfect skin would be marked with stripes like a maternal tiger.

She wanted it. She’d told me herself she wanted it.

She’d begged me to breed her.

Just thinking about it, I was hard and leaking across the fabric of my boxers, straining and desperate to be free. I was so caught up in the thought that I didn’t see her eyes flutter open, beautiful blue worlds that stared at me as I studied her.

“See something you like?” she asked, reaching up to rub at her eyes as she sucked in a deep breath, rolling onto her back as she watched me.

Still, even now that I had her, the sound of her voice was like soaring, and I felt the darkness fall away from me, leaving me with her presence.

I still couldn’t believe she was here.

“Yes,” I said simply, not fighting the smile that lifted onto my lips. “Everything.”

“I can see that,” she said, one eyebrow cocked as she looked down between us, staring at the heat that had risen between my legs .

“Sorry,” I said, still grinning. She nuzzled into my chest, forcing herself into my skin in a way that left me breathless and aching.

“Why sorry?” she asked, looking up at me through long, dark lashes. They were like the veil between life and death. It was fitting, really. Her eyes gave me life, and I felt like I’d die every time she looked away from me.

I shrugged. I didn’t even know what to say.

I couldn’t look away from her.

“Looking at you makes me crazy,” I groaned, reaching between us to press the palm of my hand against my needy dick.

Fuck, why wouldn’t it go away?

Why did I have to act like an animal and not—

My brain turned off when I felt her fingers wrapping around mine, slowly pulling my hand off of my dick.

“And if I didn’t like that, I wouldn’t be begging for it, now would I?”

Her voice was a soft, gentle purr that only raised my desire to new heights, and I sighed, grinding my teeth together.

“I know I can be too much,” I told her.

“Says who?”

I stopped. I couldn’t think of that right now. Not with her so close to me, her hands around my shaft, and the scent of her hair sticking in my nostrils.

“Says who?” she asked again.

“Everyone else,” I whispered, finally allowing myself to look down at her. There was something unreadable behind her eyes.

“Well, if you don’t mind me saying so…” she said, her fingers plucking at the waistband of my boxers and wriggling inside. Before long, I felt her long, lithe fingers wrap around me, and my entire body jerked. “Whoever ‘everyone else’ was? They’re fucking stupid.”

I couldn’t look away from her. Ever since that day at the funeral—in her little black dress with her hair done just right, she had become my entire world. Her presence had an undeniable allure that captivated me, drawing me in like a moth to a flame. The way her eyes sparkled with a mix of sorrow and resilience stirred something deep within me, igniting a fire I couldn’t ignore, and a flame I could never extinguish.

I couldn’t imagine a world where she wasn’t by my side, where her absence didn’t leave an ache in my chest. She had become the center of my universe, the axis around which my life revolved, and now that I had her, I’d die to make her happy and kill to keep her safe. I felt her begin to stroke me, her fingers sliding over me, guided by the incessant pre-cum that slipped over my shaft.

She was so beautiful, she could make my cock cry about it.

“You don’t have to—” Reaching down, I wrapped my hand around hers and fought to stop it.

“What if I want to?” she said, her tongue caught between her teeth and a mischievous grin creasing her lips.

Again, she reminded me of the things she’d said while I sat in that jail cell, caged like the animal I was.

She stroked me harder, faster until I felt that familiar feeling at the base of my spine.

“What did you mean?” I asked, my breath coming in short, hot bursts, hitching in my chest. “Before? ”

“You’ll have to be a little more specific than that,” she said with a soft giggle.

“When you came to see me… in jail,” I said, adding the words like an afterthought. “You said ‘I would’ve fucked you, anyway’.”

She laughed, a loud, musical sound that sent a different kind of shiver up my spine. Her happiness and her amusement were my drugs, and I was hopelessly addicted. I wanted to do everything I could to make sure she did it again—for the rest of our lives.

“Well,” she said, and again I could see the disobedience behind her wicked smile. “Let’s just say I’ve had a little crush for a very long time.”

She trailed off, shrugging as she continued to stroke me, her thumb swiping over the tip and sending an electric jolt slamming through me.

I laid my hand on her cheek, my thumb running across her lashes.

“ You ?” I asked, disbelief coloring my words. “Had a crush on me ?”

“Yes,” she said, and she giggled. “For a very long time. Is that so hard to believe?”

“I mean, kinda,” I said. My teeth ground together until my jaw hurt and popped, her hands moving across me in just the right way.

Fuck, how was she so good at that?

“Why?” she asked, and she stopped. Her eyes narrowed at me when I finally caught my breath and looked over at her.

“Look at you,” I said, and she pulled away, ripping her hand out of my boxers. I shivered at the loss of contact. “Then look at me. ”

Her hands found my shoulders and pushed me, flipping me onto my back. Before I knew it, she was on top of me, straddling my waist and pulling my boxers down until my dick sprung free, and I hissed as the cool air touched my sensitive organ. I watched as she pulled her panties to the side, and then I was inside of her before I even knew what was happening.

She was a persistent little shit, wasn’t she?

“Don’t worry, I looked at you,” she said, and with one roll of her hips, I saw stars. “You may not have known it, but I looked at you a lot growing up.”

“Oh, really?” My hands found her hips, guiding her up and then back down.

“Yeah, really,” she lifted so high that I nearly slipped out of her, and when she drove down on me, it was harder than before, and the slap of flesh screamed around us. “You were responsible for my very first orgasm and you weren’t even there.”

Alarm bells sounded in my head, and she giggled when my eyes went wide. My brain wouldn’t work, and I couldn’t get there even when I tried.

I pushed against her, my cock pulsating as it ground inside of her, and I could feel the wetness of her excitement slicking across my pelvic bone. She continued to ride me, rocking and grinding against her, soft mews slipping past her lips. I watched as beads of sweat collected on her forehead, the fingers pressed against my chest curling as she bit her lower lip in a way that I hoped she would let me soon. She continued to move, pulling up higher and crashing down on me harder until she developed her own heated rhythm. I was simply a passenger along for the ride .

“Come on baby,” I coaxed her, popping my hips up to meet her until her tiny breaths turned into deep, heated moans and I could hear her breath start to shake. “Show me how much you like it. You take it so good.”

She whined, a high-pitched sound that echoed in her throat as she rolled and shook, her hips undulating against me. I could tell she was close by the way her inner walls clenched around me and her fingers curled into tight fists, pressing against my sternum until it hurt.

Good. Let it hurt. I liked the pain. It reminded me that I was still human.

My hands circled her hips, yanking her down one final time and rising to meet her, slamming into her so hard that I could have sworn I heard the crack of bone on bone. Her eyes slammed shut and her mouth dropped open as she fought for every breath. Fluid gushed and soaked my lap as her pussy enveloped me, pulling me in until I was fully seated inside her. Unable to hold back any longer, I let go. With one final push, the floodgates opened, and I painted her insides with my name, carving a trench meant only for me.

No one else would touch her ever again, and if they tried, I’d cut out their heart.

She collapsed against me, shaking as I pulled her to my chest, holding onto her so tight that I could never lose her again.

I listened to the sound of her breathing going from quick and sharp to slow and calm. I felt the rapid tap of her heartbeat slow to a slow, steady pace as she relaxed against me. We lay there, calm and quiet for a long while before she picked her head up, her blue eyes looking up at me through her tangled mass of hair, stuck to her sweat-drenched forehead.

“Do you believe me now?” she asked, smiling as she gently lifted off of me and moved to stand up. She moved tenderly, and I could see by the movement of her thighs that she was sore.

Good. I liked it that way. I wanted her to remember who she belonged to every time she sat down.

“Maybe,” I said, and when she turned around to glare at me, one eyebrow cocked, I couldn’t help but laugh. “Where are you going?”

“I have to shower,” she said with a sigh. “Then I need to get back home.”

“You’re leaving?” I tried to keep the sorrow from my voice, but I could tell by the way she turned around and looked at me that I had failed miserably.

“I mean, if I’m gonna be staying in that house, I can’t stay with my dad’s old stuff forever.” She continued to the bedroom door, and my heart jumped. The way she looked at me from the doorway reminded me of yesterday, waking up to see her staring at me with a sad smile on her face.

I will never forget that moment. I will never forget the way the fog cleared and the darkness that had been eating at me slowly ebbed away and gave me a second to breathe.

“So you’re gonna stay?”

She laughed as she turned into the hallway.

“Well, I never wanted to raise a family long distance, Tommy.”

I chuckled, my arms crossed behind my head as I smiled up at the ceiling .

“Raise a family, huh?” I called as I heard her throw back the shower curtain, the metal rings clanging along the rod.

“No shit!” She called, and I laughed at the edge in her voice. “You pulled out my IUD and you’ve painted my insides with baby batter like… five times? It wouldn’t surprise me if you’ve already put it in there!”

I laughed, a hollow laugh that started deep down in my belly and continued until tears streamed from my eyes. As I lifted a hand to wipe tears from my eyes, a low vibrating hum sounded from the bedside table and I looked up, eyes narrowed. I hesitated, looking over at her phone and the little glittery case that I was so familiar with.

I knew it was an invasion of her privacy, but after everything I’d already done, was it really a step too far?

Reaching over, I swiped it off the nightstand and flipped it on. Immediately, I saw the notification, and it was from Barrett.

Are you just going to ignore me forever?

Before I could even compute the words, I was shaking with anger. After everything I had said to him, he still hadn’t taken the hint and left her the fuck alone. He got one more chance—one more strike before I knocked his head clean off his shoulders.

Leave me alone, Barrett. I don’t want to talk to you anymore.

I hit send, and promptly deleted and blocked the number.

After everything he had done, and everything he had been planning to do, I didn’t want him around her, but telling him hadn’t been enough. I needed him to think it came from her. I needed him to think she didn’t want him around, and it was all for her safety.

In a way, it was also for his.

If I saw him near her again, I’d disassemble him at the seams, and I would bury each individual piece in a different county, so deep that he would never be found.

I darkened the phone and returned it to the nightstand, my fists clenched as I tried, and failed, to stop the darkness that throbbed at the edges of my vision.

I threw myself up and out of bed, my anger shaking through me like a tidal wave. I had to push it away. I couldn’t let her see it. I stepped into the bathroom, pushing the door closed as the light buzzed over my head and the steam swirled around me. I could see her outline behind the clear shower curtain, and slowly, the anger began to trickle away, but it wasn’t enough.

Moving across the room, my hand shook as I tossed the shower curtain back, looking in at her. Something in my eyes must have scared her, because when she turned around to look at me, her blue eyes blew into flat, round disks and her full lips fell open in a look of surprise.

I’d kill him for that alone. I’d kill him for making me scare my moth.

I was supposed to be her safe place. I was supposed to be—

My eyes fell lower, to the silver chain that sparkled around her neck, the moth clasp resting against the hollow of her throat, where her collarbones came together in a sweeping arch like angel wings .

“You are mine,” I told her, reaching out to wrap my hand delicately around her throat. She didn’t flinch or pull away. Instead, she leaned into me, as if desperate for my touch. My cock noticed the sharp intake of her breath and jumped to life. “Do you understand?”

She nodded, a sliver of her pink tongue coming out to lick her lips and wet them as if her mouth were suddenly dry—and maybe it was. Maybe there was a part of her, deep down inside, that was still afraid of me.

I shouldn’t like that. It shouldn’t have turned me on like it did.

I pulled her into a kiss, so deep that it was bruising, and she moaned into my mouth. I swallowed it down, desperate for the taste of her.

My fingers found the line of her jaw and slid back into her mess of tawny hair, pulling at the roots and tipping her head back. My lips slid to her throat, and I could feel the thunder of her pulse beneath my lips. Without warning, my teeth found her skin, and I bit down and suck, but not too hard.

I want to mark her, but I don’t want to hurt her. I am nothing if not a man of my word. I will never hurt her.

She squirmed underneath me, a soft gasp slipping from her mouth, but she didn’t pull away. Thank the fucking gods, she didn’t pull away.

Never run from a predator.

After a moment, I released her, and I stared down at the red mark that oozed like lava under her flesh.

My mark. I’ve marked her.

She’s mine .

“Get on your knees. Show me you understand,” I said, and she did it without a second of hesitation, kneeling in the water as it drummed across her back and shoulders, splattering like rain across the tile. She was on me without a second thought, her delicate fingers ripping down the waistband of my boxers and exposing my rock-hard cock into the humid air.

She’s well trained, lucky for me, and I hadn’t had to do much training. Maybe it came naturally. Maybe she was the same kind of deviant I was, cut from the same cloth.

“Open your mouth. Now.”

She did as she was told, gulping hard, her lips parting with a soft whine of excitement. My dick pushed against her bottom lip, cutting it against her teeth. She whimpered but stayed still, doing as she was told.

I forced myself in and out of her mouth, feeling that familiar burn at the base of my spine, before a single, brutal thrust of my hips forced the head of my dick down her throat. Her shoulders jerked, a deep, hollow retch leaving her throat as she fought the baser instincts of her body. I looked down at her, and one look into her beautiful blue eyes, leaking diamond trails down her hollowed cheeks, nearly brought me to my knees.

“Good girl. You’re such a good girl. You suck it so good. Don’t stop.”

I pulled back, just enough to give her room to breathe, watching the mixture of saliva and pre-cum bubbling at the corners of her perfect lips, nostrils flaring as she fought for air. Reaching down, one hand tangled in her fawn-colored mane, keeping her pinned to me .

My Little Moth, the perfect little doe.

I pushed again, a single rough buck that forced her throat open for me, and she jerked back so violently that her skull rapped against the tile with a sickening sound.

She opened her mouth to speak, but her voice tangled when my palm whipped against her cheek, tossing her head to the side. Her hair flew out around her face like thrashing, tangled vines, and when she looked up at me again, her eyes were wide and full of shock. Tomorrow she would see the handprint, the reddened indentations of his fingers spreading into her hairline like a sunburst—an exploding star—and she would remember this lesson.

“Did I say you could stop?” I asked, one eyebrow cocked as I looked down at her, and I watched her throat bob up and down when she swallowed.

“No Daddy,” she whispered, her voice harsh and her breath coming in sharp, rattling bites.

I pulled her forward and pushed into her mouth again, her hands coming up to press against my thighs as she fought to hold herself steady. Groaning, she fought the tears that prickled in the corners of her eyes, her hands gripping my hips to hold herself steady. She needed something to keep her grounded, and she found me. I was there, just like I would always be there. I was her comfort, her safety in the storm.

Even if the storm was me.

I continued to fuck her mouth, slowly in and out as she worked her tongue across the shaft and then swirled it over the head, catching every drop of desire that drooled across her tongue.

“Good girl. Fuck, you’re such a good little whore. ”

I was close, and it began to throb and hurt, raw and aching from the number of times I’d given it to her.

Fuck, she was going to tear my dick to shreds, but I just couldn’t stay away from her. Worth it. It was all worth it.

Just when I knew I was close, I pulled back, stepping away from her to give her the view she wanted. I saw her watching me, her swollen lips falling open as I swiped her panties off the counter and, holding them in one hand, wrapped them around my cock. It only took two strokes before I spilled myself across the crotch of her underwear, cupping them around the head as I pumped ribbon after ribbon across the fabric.

When I looked up at her, the shock on her face was unmistakable, and it brought a chuckle bubbling in my chest.

“Now you’ll wear them home like a good little girl, just like this. I want you to smell like me, and anyone who tries to come near you will know who you belong to.”