26. Summer
CHAPTER 26
Summer
R yan and I sit in the surgery center waiting room. The medical team just took Emma back and said it wouldn’t be long before she was out of surgery. I can’t stop the anxious bounce of my knee, or the way I keep glancing toward the double doors where the nurse will come out to update us.
“She’s going to be just fine. I know it has to be scary, but at least they’re confident they caught the appendicitis before it got more serious. My little cousin had the same surgery years ago. She was up and running around pretty quickly. Emma will be back to normal before you know it,” Ryan says, rubbing his hand up and down my arm in slow, soothing motions.
“I know she’s going to be okay. It just sucks that she has to go through this and that there’s nothing I can do for her to make it better,” I say, tears making my voice low and strained. Being a mother means having your literal heart walking around outside your chest. Knowing there is nothing I can do to take this away for her is the closest thing to torture I’ve ever endured.
“You already did everything you could by rushing to bring her here. Now you just have to get together some of her favorite things so she has something to do while she’s recovering. Maybe you can put your mind to that?” he suggests. I nod, sniffling. I decide to take his suggestion to heart and create a list on my phone of some things she enjoys that she can do lying down. I order a few new toys and books for her online and take the time to update Rachel on Emma. I feel mildly better after being productive in the only way I can be right now.
A nurse wearing dark-blue scrubs comes into the room and approaches us. She pulls her mask down with a smile and says, “Hi, are you the parents of Emma Forrester?”
“Yes, what’s going on?” I say, not bothering to correct her assumption that Ryan is Emma’s dad. There are more important things happening.
“Don’t worry, the surgery is going great. Dr. Watkins is almost done removing her appendix now. He just wanted me to come out and give you an update. He said that it’s a good thing you brought her in when you did because it looked even more inflamed than the scans showed, and it had a good chance of bursting. That causes much more serious complications. Like I said, you guys did the right thing bringing her in. He’ll be done with the surgery soon. I’ll come out to update you again when she’s headed into recovery. You should be able to see her shortly after that.”
I rush out a breath and say, “Thank you.”
“Of course! I know this is Emma’s first surgery, and that’s always nerve-wracking for the parents. Honestly, it’s harder on you guys than her. She’s taking a nice little nap while mom and dad are out here worrying.” She gives me a reassuring smile. “Any questions you want me to pass along, Mom? Dad?”
Just as Ryan is opening his mouth to, I’m sure, clarify the mixup, I hear Jared’s angry voice before I see him. “Dad?! Who the fuck do you think you are?” His wild-eyed expression quickly morphs from fear to fury as he levels Ryan with a hard stare.
The nurse looks between the three of us and says, “I’ll be back shortly. Please remember this is a hospital, not a dive bar. We expect everyone to act accordingly.” She says this last bit to Jared. His jaw ticks in annoyance before he sits in the chair on the other side of me, nodding curtly in understanding.
“Thank you again for the update. Don’t worry, we won’t cause a scene,” I say placatingly, shooting daggers at Jared.
The nurse heads back through the door she came from. I’m thankful we’re alone in the waiting room, because Jared immediately turns to me and spits, “What the hell is he still doing here?” He flings a hand toward Ryan in annoyance. “You said in your message that he was driving you, but there’s no reason for him to still be here playing dad with my kid!”
“Lower your voice.” I stare at him until his arms cross and he leans away from me. “No one is ‘playing Dad.’ Ryan is here for me while we wait. He’s not here for Emma. He hasn’t even said a word to her. It’s not a big deal, and definitely not the biggest problem we have today. Don’t you think?” I gesture to the room around us.
He visibly deflates and says, “How is she? I know you texted me when they took her back for surgery, but did the nurse give any updates?”
“She just said that the doctor is close to finishing the surgery and that it was a good thing we brought her in. Her appendix looked close to bursting, I guess,” I say with a shiver. I hate thinking of what could have happened if we hadn’t rushed her here.
“But she’s going to be okay?” He searches my face anxiously.
I soften a bit when I see the fear written plainly in his expression. “Yes, she’ll be fine. They want to keep her overnight for observation, but she should be good to go home tomorrow,” I reply.
“Good. That’s good.” He rubs his hands down his thighs and looks at me out of the corner of his eye before he says, “I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner. I just got within range of cell service like twenty minutes ago. I hauled ass to get here as soon as I heard your messages.” That’s the only problem with living at the base of the Sierra Nevada mountains: The cell service is spotty at best.
“It’s not your fault. There’s no way you could have predicted this was going to happen.”
He looks at me guiltily. “She did say her stomach hurt this morning before school.” When I give him an incredulous look he rushes out, “But I swear she didn’t have a temperature. I just thought she wanted to stay home because they did some sort of test for first-grade readiness today. I promise if I thought it was anything serious, I would have kept her home.” I nod, because I probably would have done the same thing.
He leans around me and fixes Ryan with a stare. His voice is a near growl when he says, “You can go now.”
Ryan ignores Jared and turns his attention to me, saying in a low voice, “Hey, I’m going to grab a cup of coffee. Do you want to come with me, Summer?” He places his warm hand on my shoulder.
“Sure.” I stand quickly and turn to Jared. “I’ll be five minutes. Will you call if the nurse comes back?” He gives a sulky nod and pulls out his phone.
RYAN
I lead Summer out into the hall and we walk a ways before I say, “Do you really want a cup of coffee? When my sister had her son and I came to visit, I remember it tasting like battery acid, but I’ll still get you a cup if you want it.” I interlace our hands and tug her to a stop.
She leads me to the side so we’re out of the way of anyone who needs to get by. “I’m good. I just figured you wanted to talk. What’s up?”
“Yeah, I guess I wasn’t that subtle.” I laugh and scrub the back of my head with my free hand. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. Jared always seems to make things worse and you’ve already had a rough day.”
“I’m as okay as I can be. Do I wish he didn’t act like a child all the time lately? Yes. But it is what it is right now.” She shrugs, exhaustion weighing the movement down.
I squeeze her hand still tangled in my own, “Do you want me to head out? I know I’m not supposed to have much contact with Emma, but this seems like special circumstances. I want to be here for you if you need me.”
Summer leans forward and gives me a long, lingering kiss that just borders on inappropriate for a hospital, and I don’t mind one bit. She pulls back and rests her forehead on mine. “You have no idea how nice it is to feel taken care of.” She leans back and looks me in the eye, a soft smile tugging the corners of her mouth up. I know she’s thinking about our conversation this morning and letting me know, again, that she isn’t going anywhere. I can’t help the smile that tugs at the corners of my mouth.
She says, “As much as I want you here for me, I have to think about Emma. Even if you didn’t go see her in recovery, just waiting here is going to put Jared on edge. I don’t want Emma to have anything else to stress about today.”
“Okay, I can understand that. Are you sure you’re going to be okay with him?” I loosen my grip on her hand, so I can use both thumbs to sweep away the dark smudges of makeup left under her eyes from crying earlier.
“I’ll be fine. I’ve been dealing with Jared for a long time. He’s worse than usual these days, but I’m hoping he’ll dial that back if you head home. As annoying as he’s been, he always puts Emma first.” She leans into my touch for a second longer and then backs away, letting my hands drop from her face.
“Okay. How about I deal with your car? I’ll go home and get my jumper cables to try to start it. If that doesn’t work, I’ll take it to the mechanics for you. I’m assuming Jared can give you a ride?” I feel better now that I have a purpose again .
“That would be amazing. I honestly kind of forgot about my stupid car.” She runs her fingers through her long hair, fluffing it back over her shoulders.
“I’ll put the booster in your backseat again, too. Will you please send me a text when she’s out of surgery? I want to know that she’s okay,” I say earnestly.
Without warning, she tugs me in for another kiss that has me reeling. With a hand splayed over her lower back, I press her flush against me and relish in the feel of her soft body in my hands. I break the kiss before my lower half gets any ideas. “What was that for?” I ask, a little dazed.
“Sometimes I just think that you’re too good to be true, you know that?”
“The feeling is mutual,” I say, tucking a stray hair behind her ear and kissing her forehead. I allow myself a moment to inhale the scent of her shampoo—something floral with a minty kick before I pull back. “Text me, okay? I’ll let you know about the car.” She hands me her set of keys and nods.
“Thanks for everything today. It means a lot that when I needed you, you were here, no questions.”
“Anytime, day or night.” I brush my hand down her smooth arm before taking her hand in mine for a second, squeezing it in goodbye. She squeezes back before turning towards the surgery center. I watch her walk away, lush hips swaying, hair brushing the curve of her waist, and I can’t help the feeling of dread that hollows out my stomach.