1. Micah
“It’s a good thing you’re my best friend, or I might be insulted that you’re kicking me out of my own apartment for the long weekend.” I flipped the lid of my suitcase closed and zipped it up. Haden, my best friend, roommate, and favorite pain in the ass, leaned in the doorway, a self-satisfied smirk on his face.
“You love me.”
“Not enough want to stay around for post-proposal sex.” Haden was going to pop the question to his long-time girlfriend Samantha, and although I was deliriously happy for my friend, I had no desire to stick around for what was sure to be a romantic weekend.
“You know I could still book a room for Sam and I.”
Grabbing my suitcase, I waved him off. “It’s fine. I know how Sam can get about new places and different beds and stuff. Tell her congratulations for me. It’s definitely not a hardship to head up to the cabin for the weekend. I’m going to stop on the way and get a jar of peanut butter and eat it with a spoon and not worry about killing my best friend. Your deadly peanut allergy is highly inconvenient sometimes.” I grinned and pushed past him, grabbing my jacket on the way to the door.
Haden returned my smile. “Sam and I both appreciate that.” He followed me to the door. “When will you be back?”
“Don’t worry. I’ll give you a text in plenty of time for you to open a window and air the place out.”
“We’re not that bad.”
I set my suitcase down long enough to pull my jacket on and zip it up. Haden pulled me into a hug, and I patted him on the back.
“What if Sam says no?” Haden asked, gripping me tighter.
“She won’t say no. She loves the fuck out of you. You two literally talk about this shit. She’s been waiting for you to ask. Trust me.”
Haden pulled back and eyed me with suspicion. “What do you know?”
“Me?” I put my hand to my chest. “Me? Why would I know anything.” I snatched my suitcase off the floor and stepped out into the hallway. “See you in a few days, Haden.”
“What do you know, Micah? Tell me, goddamnit.”
I tossed a wave over my shoulder as I turned the corner, laughing at the frustrated groan Haden emitted before shutting our apartment door.
Even if sticking around for their sex fest wouldn’t have been weird, I didn’t want to be anywhere near a happy couple. My last relationship had crashed and burned a year ago, and I was fucking lonely. No matter how hard I tried to be okay by myself, seeing other people have what I wanted sucked. Love and happiness and someone to cuddle up with at night. Someone to share good days and bad days with. So, yeah, definitely didn’t want to stick around for the lovey-dovey bullshit that would have me green with envy.
The cabin my family owned wasn’t convenient to get to by any means. It was located a few hours out of town, up in the mountains. We kept snowshoes and cross country skis up there, so should I get bored of sitting by the fire reading—unlikely—I could even entertain myself outdoors.
The drive there made me feel better about things, and by the time I stopped at the grocery store to stock up on supplies for the weekend, I felt not too bad about my life choices. So what if I was still single and almost thirty and living with my best friend? Sooner or later, he and Samantha would move out, and then I’d be single, almost thirty, and living alone.
At least then I could keep peanut butter in the house. I tossed a small jar of smooth into the shopping cart, and after a moment of hesitation, added a small jar of crunchy. I didn’t normally drink alone, but if I was going to spend the weekend by myself, I decided to indulge with a bottle of wine. The idea of a nice fire, a glass of wine, and a book wouldn”t leave my head. Or maybe a glass of wine and a bath. I’d decide later.
In the time I’d been in the store, the weather had taken a turn. Gentle snowfall had turned into a blizzard. As I loaded the bags into the car, I decided to chance it. Why hunker down in a cheap motel when I could white-knuckle my way to the cabin where I’d be more comfortable?
After thirty minutes on the road, I began to question the wisdom of my decision. Nervous sweat trickled down my back. I leaned forward in my seat, trying to navigate the road. A road I couldn’t see. Fuck my life. I was probably going to die in a ditch on a snowy mountain road. My popsicle body would be found in the spring when everything thawed out, and Haden’s engagement weekend would forever be marred by the black cloud of my untimely demise.
Dramatic? Me? Never. I flipped on the radio. Even though I could think better in the quiet, the crushing weight of loneliness threatened to make me cry. If I’d had company for the weekend, maybe we’d have stayed in a cheap motel and made the most of it. But as it stood, I was creeping my way up a mountain in the dark because although I’d timed my arrival for before sunset, the storm had slowed my progress significantly.
“I hate to interrupt our programming, folks, but it’s just come in that because of the storm and deteriorating road conditions, closures are in effect for routes seven and four and highway three.”
My gut clenched, and my grip tightened on the wheel. I was on a closed road. I could turn back, but at this point I was closer to the cabin than I was to town. Turning around seemed stupid when I could keep going slow and steady and get to the cabin where I’d be safe.
When they started to list off routes that were closed due to traffic accidents, I shut the radio off and drove in silence.
“It’s okay, Micah. You can do this.” There was no one in the car, but talking made me feel better, like maybe I would be okay if I could talk my way through things. “You’re going to drive nice and slow to the cabin and you’ll be safe. You’ve got four-wheel drive and good tires and a full tank of gas, because your dad taught you well.” I squinted at the road in front of me, or what I hoped was the road. With no other traffic around, it was hard to tell. “You’re not pathetic for going on a weekend trip alone. Plenty of people do stuff like this, and they’re adventurous and cool. That means you are also adventurous and cool.”
I didn’t believe a single word I said, but the constant chatter was a nervous habit. I was usually able to quell the urge to babble incessantly, but the stress of the situation and the realization that I was probably in danger had killed my ability to contain myself.
“You’re not all that adventurous, Micah. You’re not cut out for the adrenaline junkie lifestyle. You can barely keep your shit together now, and you’re almost there. I think you’re almost there. Why am I talking to myself like this? Maybe I’ve finally cracked.” My laugh was strained and almost brought me to tears, if I were honest. Which, why not be honest? I was scared shitless of dying on this stupid road. I wanted my cabin and a hot bath and a glass of wine, because if I survived this shit, I deserved a glass or three.
If I made it out of this ordeal alive, I promised myself to take more risks. Not risky ones like this, which might actually kill me. But I could ask out the cute barista, or I could download a dating app and try that again. Safe risks.
When the familiar driveway came into view, I could have sobbed with relief. We’d built a huge archway over the entrance and put reflective markers on either side of the driveway so we could find it easily. It was still another mile to the cabin from here, and I’d have to take it even slower down the narrow road, but I had made it. Relief made me practically giddy.
“See, Micah? Nothing to it. You’re a whole-ass adult who can do adult things like drive somewhere all by himself, even in a snowstorm over closed roads. You can do shit yourself. You don’t need anyone.”
The lies felt good in the moment, like as a reward for doing a hard thing, I could fool myself for a short time. I tried to be as honest with myself as possible, but sometimes it was nice to let myself be delusional.
After an eternity, the cabin came into view. It was strange to see the lights on, but maybe my parents had told the caretaker who lived nearby that I was coming up for the weekend. Maybe he’d started up the hot tub, too. I could live with that.
I pulled up in front of the cabin and turned my vehicle off. The tension bled out of me so fast I nearly fucking fainted. I undid my seat belt with shaky hands and hopped out, then grabbed my bag with one hand and my bags of groceries with the other. I’d park in the detached garage after I put my stuff away, but for now I was happy to be off the road where it was safe.
I set my bag down and unlocked the door, but I knew something was up the moment I stepped inside. The gently thumping music did little to disguise the noises coming from the living room.
Because it wasn’t enough that I had to spend the weekend away so Haden could propose, I had landed smack dab in the middle of Zeke and Connor’s private fuck fest. The universe fucking hated me. That was the only explanation for me ending up here, in the presence of my two greatest unrequited crushes. Two men who would never see me as anything but their best friend’s little brother.
Zeke had Connor bent over the back of the couch and I let my gaze linger on the way his ass flexed as he thrust hard and deep, reminding me of all the ways I’d never have either of them. Fed up with life and everything about it, I dropped my suitcase on the floor. The two surprised fuck-bunnies shouted in a mix of rage and surprise.
“Surprise,” I said, feeling and sounding anything but jovial. “The roads are closed, or I’d turn right back around and leave. But here I am, and I guess you’re stuck with me.” Could this weekend get any worse?