31. Emilio
“ C ome on. Wake up. I’ve got coffee.” I swat at Benjamin, who is shaking me. “It’s time to get ready. You’ve got to meet Antonio. Remember…first act as a Boss.”
Grumbling, I roll out of bed and blink open my eyes, glaring at my best friend. I barely slept. Instead, I tossed and turned with nightmares running through my head. I snatch the cup of coffee out of Benjamin’s hand and gulp it down, not caring about it scalding my tongue. Fucking hell .
“I’m up,” I grunt, thrusting the empty mug at Benjamin. “Fuck. I’ll get ready. How much time do I have?”
“You’ve got about an hour. I wanted to let you sleep as much as I could, and still give you time for coffee.”
I scrub at my face, scrunching my nose when I glance around for my clothes. I stumble upright and pull on yesterday’s garments, hating the feeling of being dirty. Yawning, I croak out, “I’m going to need another cup. Right now, I have to get a shower and put on some new clothes…”
Benjamin shifts his weight uncomfortably. “Uh, I don’t think mine will fit you, and I don’t exactly have anything in your style for this type of stealth…”
“Fuck.” I drop my head back, praying for some sort of divine intervention. “I didn’t think to grab anything before I went to bed. It’s fine. If he’s in the bedroom, he should be sleeping.”
“And if he’s not?” Benjamin studies me, his brow furrowed in worry.
I stretch my neck out, hoping to release some of the tension that wouldn’t even fucking disappear during sleep. “Then I’ll deal with it. He should leave me alone, especially since I’m claiming my fucking birthright.”
I clasp Benjamin on the shoulder and give him a smile that I hope reassures him, but it falls short, and I know it. Exhaling, I let my hand drop as I walk out without another word, because, fuck. What can I say?
Feeling like a thief, I sneak around the mansion, trying to be quiet. The sense of comfort and being home here seems to have disappeared, and I hate it. There’s nothing I can do about it—at least, right now. The door to mine and Allesandro’s room is open, which should mean he’s not there.
Walking in, I breathe a sigh of relief when the bed appears empty.
The moonlight filtering through the window illuminates it.
My heart hurts when I realize that means he’s likely with Cristian.
I rub at my chest and try to shake it off.
We have too important of a task tonight for me to be ruminating over shattered dreams.
Turning on the light, I head toward the closet.
Quickly, I pull out my dark clothes that are perfect for infiltrating.
Moving silently, I make it to the bathroom and quickly take care of my needs after turning on the shower.
Stripping out of my clothes, I shudder in the chill, as my body is still waking up.
Hopefully, the shower will invigorate me.
It doesn’t take long for the water to warm up, and I groan quietly in relief as I step inside, letting the powerful stream beat down on me.
I shower quickly, but not even the lure of coffee can get me to leave the heat. Instead, I close my eyes and focus on relaxing. Leaning against the wall, I pretend the tears that are falling are part of the water cascading down on me.
“Fuck!” I jolt when two hands clamp around my waist. I try to jerk out of it, but his grip is holding me tight enough that bruises will soon bloom on my skin.
Growling, Il Padrone yanks me closer. I tense harder as he snaps out, “Stop it. You will submit to me.”
“No,” I shout as he grabs the soap, coldness flashing through me as I recognize what he’s going to do.
He shoves me into the wall and I hear him squirt soap onto his fingers.
I push against the slippery surface, trying to gain my balance.
As he breaches my ass, I hiss out, “I will hate you for this. And I'll never forgive you.”
His dark chuckle echoes in the room as the soap burns my insides. His movements are rough as he barely stretches me, and the string is almost unbearable. I claw the walls, knowing it’s useless, but unable to stop my frantic movements. I try to go on my toes, doing anything to escape.
“You can fight all you want, Little One. But it’s not going to stop me. You need to remember I own you—all of you. Your pain, your pleasure, everything.”
I hate him. Loathe him. Especially, for using that term of endearment as he breaches me with his cock.
When his hand comes around me and squeezes my neck, the fight leaves me.
I yield to him, and I detest myself for it—for losing the fight as he takes my body.
Tears roll down my face uncontrollably, and it’s not just his hand that makes it hard to breathe.
“That’s right. Give in to me. I am your Master. You have no right to walk away. You. Are. Mine.” He punctuates each word with a sharp thrust to my prostate, and I feel myself respond as disgust rolls through me. “You’re going to come for me. You’re going to show me exactly why I am in charge.”
His harsh breath rasps against my ear, and he finally lets go of my throat.
Dropping his hand to my cock, he grips me tightly, working it over quickly and hard.
Scrunching my nose against the cutting edge of pain and pleasure, I try to hold back, but it’s useless and I fucking know it.
He’s trained my body too well. Despite the way my heart is breaking, my body responds, just like it always does for him.
“Come,” he commands, and I shatter into a million pieces as the orgasm washes over me. My body shakes, but it’s not from the blinding pleasure rolling through me. It’s the loss of something I never thought would happen. It’s the final blow to the respect and trust between us.
I let him use me, and it doesn’t take long before he reaches his own completion. I stiffen as he withdraws from me, the pain infiltrating me once again. He turns me to face him, and stares deep into my eyes.
“I fucking hate you,” I whisper, the sound almost drowned out by the water.
He shakes his head, almost as if in a daze, before gripping my chin. “You will get over it. You’re mine, Emilio. Remember that. I will never let you go. You can pretend to be a Boss all you want, but you know where you belong. Under me.”
He hurriedly escapes the shower and I slump against the wall, before sliding down onto my knees. I tremble as the hot water pours down, but it doesn't warm me. Not anymore. Fuck . I may never get warm again.
I struggle to stand, and it takes several attempts to turn the shower off before I stumble out of it.
Thankfully, he’s not in the bathroom, and I clumsily dry myself before putting my clothes on.
Carefully, I ignore the mirror, afraid of what I'll see—maybe the love for him still lingers. I don’t know, but I can’t face it right now. I need to be gone. Fucking now.
When I open the door to the bedroom and peek out, he’s not there. I sigh in relief as I make my away across the room we shared, the one we found so much solace and love in. I walk out of the bedroom, closing the door with a finality that rings in my soul.
Benjamin is waiting at the bottom of the stairs with a cup of coffee, when I manage to make it the rest of the way.
Taking one look at me, he almost drops it, but thankfully, doesn’t.
It would be a shame for good coffee to go to waste.
He opens his mouth to say something, but I hold up my hand and shake my head.
“I…can’t. Not right now.”
While I tried to be quiet about it, it must not have worked, because suddenly, I’m the subject of scrutiny for the others milling around. I pointedly ignore them and drink my coffee instead.
Hopefully, Antonio gets us moving soon. I can’t stay here.
Right now, I need time to process. If I’m lucky, I’ll get to kill some people tonight.
It’d make me feel a whole fuck-ton better, and it may stop me from doing something I regret.
At least, I tell myself I might regret it.
Truthfully, I…don’t know anymore. How the fuck did we get here?
“Seriously. I won’t ask for details, but I need to know you’re alright,” Benjamin leans in and whispers in my ear. I stare at him, and only then do I realize I’m rubbing my chest again.
Fucking hell. I’ve survived so much in my life.
Yet, this? This may be what puts me in the ground…
it certainly feels like I’m dying. I try to give Benjamin a nod of reassurance, but I can’t manage it completely.
Instead, I pass him my empty mug and head closer to the others.
It's time to get this over with. Fuck knows I need it, and from the pained expression in Carter’s eyes, so does he.