Chapter 13
Sage
We sat at Preston’s breakfast nook. He told me it was his favorite place on Earth aside from his bedroom if he was with someone special. He had winked when he said the word special and I decided he meant me.
The sunlight through the shiny, paned windows was like honey and gold today. Preston had his laptop open but he wasn’t looking at it. He was gazing out the window, his eyes all sort of misty and lost. I had cereal in front of me. I was hungry, but hungry for something else that wasn’t food.
This morning had been like a dream. A fantasy fairy tale sex scene where the foreplay had been an incredible bath complete with toys. Extraordinary.
I wanted my daddy again. My body itched with desire. I couldn’t stop the feeling even as I took another spoonful of Cheerios. It was sweet and the milk cold, but I could barely taste it. Every part of me was honed in, focused on the fire in my belly that wouldn’t go out.
While all that was happening, my mouth opened and out poured the most mundane words.
“I have to go to work today.”
Preston’s gaze shifted toward me, still slightly glazed. “When?”
“Six to midnight.”
He glanced away. “All right.”
I gulped, looking down at my bowl. “I want to call in sick. I have tomorrow off….” Was I asking too much? He hadn’t invited me to stay. Hadn’t even hinted. But if he might even begin to pout, was that what I was seeing on his face?
When he raised his head, a small bit of light danced in his eyes. “Don’t you need to work, though?”
I nodded. “I’m only part-time. I don’t have sick leave. But it’s okay for one night.”
“You’re a student. I wouldn’t want you to have to sacrifice that.”
“I have a full scholarship, though.” I put it out there, waiting to see his reaction.
He hesitated, then said softly, “Smart boy.”
I couldn’t help but puff out my chest. Praise, again. “I took two years off after high school before going to college. That’s why I haven’t graduated yet.”
“You already told me but I never questioned that.” His voice sounded distant. Distracted.
“I wanted to be sure you remembered.”
With an unexpected gesture, he reached across the table and put his fingers against my left cheek. “I want you to stay.”
I leaned into his touch. “Me, too.”
“But not if it means any hardship to you.” His eyebrows raised. “I have an idea.”
“What?”
His forefinger caressed my cheek. “You go home, get some studying done and do whatever you need to do. Then come here after work.”
“After midnight?”
Preston shrugged. “Why not?”
“But won’t you be asleep?”
He smiled softly. “Not if I know you’re coming back.”
“I want to. Yes. I’ll come back here after work.”
“Good. It’s settled. And then we can spend the day together tomorrow. Okay?”
“I would love that.” My response barely communicated my true feelings. I wanted to jump and yell in celebration that Daddy Preston wanted me back for tonight.
“I would love that, too, baby.” Preston’s smile revealed his white teeth. His eyes flickered.
I’d brought nothing but my backpack with me to his house.
In it was my laptop, my new stuffed toy from Daddy, and not much else but a few little toys I kept secret from others but liked to have with me wherever I went.
A keychain with a plastic pink bunny. A little windup reindeer I’d bought two Christmases ago.
A blue pacifier on a necklace chain which I had never ever worn.
When I was ready to leave, Daddy Preston walked me to the door.
“Promise to come back,” he said with a half-smile.
I took my backpack off the hook and opened it, pulling out the necklace. I held it up to Daddy.
“What’s this?”
“I’ve never worn it but it’s one of my favorite things. Keep it until I come back for it.”
Preston took the necklace from me, letting it dangle from his hand. “I’ll treasure it like it’s gold,” he replied.
“You don’t think it’s strange? Or funny?”
“No. Like you, it’s beautiful. I’ll keep it safe.”
“Thank you.” My eyes stung a little.
“No. Thank you,” Preston said. He grabbed my sweater and handed it to me. “Don’t forget this.” Then he leaned down and put his hand, still holding the necklace, behind my head and pulled me in for a delicious kiss.
I didn’t remember driving home.
That afternoon, when I wasn’t studying or getting ready for work, I floated through my small apartment. Gravity had lessened. I was like a feather floating up in an air current, my head in the clouds.
At the pub, I had a lot of energy. This time I focused and mixed the drinks perfectly. I smiled and chatted with everyone. It brought in some great tips even though students tended to be stingy. But Saturday nights were the best to work here.
“You’re in a good mood,” Mateo said.
“Yeah, I guess so.”
“Not as distracted as yesterday.”
“Sorry about that.”
“It’s okay. Did you have fun last night?”
“Yeah.”
My mind wanted to come apart and fall into the memories and think about how after work tonight I’d be in my daddy’s arms again. Soon.
“Meet someone?”
“Maybe.”
“I want to hear all about him.”
I made a face at him. “Nosy much?”
“I get it. You don’t want to say anything to jinx it.”
He was strangely right. But also, a part of me wanted to keep Preston all to myself.
I was being possessive. And yes, also defensive because what if?
What if it didn’t turn out? What if Preston and I were only a fling?
That scared me more than I could stand. Then I really wouldn’t want people to know.
I’d be too sad. And maybe even embarrassed because I’d let myself fall so hard so fast.
What did psychology have to say about people like that? I could run down the list. Insecure. Needy. Obsessive. Prone to anxiety. Even unstable.
I winked at Mateo. “You’re exactly right. Don’t want to jinx it.”
“Are you seeing him again?”
I didn’t want him to know anything yet, so my answer was vague as I shrugged. “Maybe.”
“That’s fine. Keep your secrets. I’ve got my own life.”
“Yeah? What’s going on?”
He started to babble on and on about his own new boyfriend. My distraction caper had worked.
I was a little late getting out of the building.
My tips had to be counted and the manager had to verify it.
I had made more than usual, even for a Saturday night.
Plus, I had to verify my schedule for the next week which had just been posted.
They worked around my class schedule, so my hours were pretty much the same week to week, but I had to be sure because sometimes they changed and one time I didn’t notice and I walked in with everyone staring at me, asking why I was late. I never wanted that to happen again.
Finally, I drove toward Preston’s so excited I had to keep looking at my dashboard to make sure I wasn’t speeding. I turned on my favorite music and sang loudly.
I was seeing my new daddy again! And so soon. I could barely contain myself.