Chapter 31
MASSIMO
She’s so fucking beautiful it’s testing every last fringe of my willpower and self-control not to take her mouth again, roll her to her back, and show her exactly what I’m talking about.
Fuck, the utter desire in her eyes is almost too much.
She’s staring at me with such trust, such need, it’s prickling at every instinct I have.
I might be playing a dangerous game, but I don’t care. I want this woman with everything in me. Even if it means waiting and jacking off in the shower until she’s ready. I don’t give a fuck. I just want her.
“Massimo,” she whispers again, a slight tremble in her voice. “I-I-I don’t know what to say to you.”
“You don’t have to say anything. I only want you to think about it. Think about you and me, about what we can be, what you want. We can work everything else out, but the only thing that matters is you and me.”
I think she’s going to start to argue again, doubt flashing across her face, but she surprises me by nodding slowly. I know I shouldn’t get too excited about it yet, but the triumph wells in my chest anyway.
“Kiss me, cerbiatta,” I coax. “Give me your mouth and let me taste you again. Let me taste what’s mine.”
She gives a soft moan, but she sinks into me, her mouth pressing over mine in a kind of desperation that echoes inside me. I don’t hurry the kiss, don’t push. I can still sense that lingering doubt trying to creep in but I don’t allow it to take root. I want to drive it away.
Lucy’s body rocks forward, her hands moving from my shoulders into my hair, sliding and scraping along the sensitive skin, and making a groan wrench from deep in my chest. She does it again, and I swear my cock is going to burst from my sweats at this rate with how hard I am.
She’s intoxicating. I want to devour her. Savor her.
Her tongue slides into my mouth, and I’m gone. I don’t hold back anymore. The switch flipped.
She gives a low groan as I deepen and intensify the kiss, my hand gripping her ponytail to angle her head so I can get deeper. Taste more of her. I never knew kissing a woman could be so fucking erotic. Make me feel so full of desire that it’s the only thing that matters to me.
Yet, with this woman, that’s exactly what it is.
She rises on her knees, towering over me slightly, and my free hand grips her ass tightly, squeezing and holding her close as she moans into my mouth again.
Fuck, I want to throw her back on the bed, taste every inch of her.
I want to feel her under me, over me, and in every position we can think of.
I want to see her eyes glaze over as I fuck her, showing her that she’s mine. That there won’t be anyone else.
She’ll always be mine.
A sharp, angry cry fills the air, and we both still.
Another one, and Lucy yanks her mouth from mine so fast that I don’t have time to stop her.
She’s pulling away, and rolling toward Soren’s bassinet, where his cries are becoming more insistent and angry.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Lucy rasps huskily as she quickly picks him up and out. “What’s the matter?”
Maybe other men would be angry at the interruption, but instead, a sharp wave of satisfaction as I stare at Lucy trying to calm down her son.
No. Not her son. Our son. Because I don’t just want Lucy, I want Soren too.
Soren lets out another angry squawk and she lifts him up sniffing at him, her nose curling in disgust. “Alright, I guess that answers that question,” she grimaces, making me laugh.
“Would you like me to change him?”
She shakes her head. “No, I got this. Trust me, this isn’t going to be pretty.” Then she gets up and carries him into the bathroom, never looking back at me as she murmurs softly to him.
I want to go after her, insist that she let me in, let me help, but caution overrides it. She’s already feeling overwhelmed and unsure, and while I have a small victory, that doesn’t mean I’ve won the battle. One wrong step and she’ll slip through my fingers.
Instead, I focus on getting my body under control. Not an easy task with the taste of her still filling my mouth, but somehow I manage it. Finally, I force myself up off the bed, heading for the bathroom to check on her and Soren, but stop when I hear a sharp rap on the door.
I move to open it, looking surprised when I see my father standing there. I open the door wider, inviting him in. He looks around, brow arched. “Where’s Lucy?”
“Soren needed a diaper change, so she’s in the bathroom with him.”
Papa nods, watching me carefully. There’s nothing any of us have been able to hide from him. He’s one of the most astute men I’ve ever met. Him and Aurelio, I think, are cut from the same cloth. “She is the one you choose, yes?” he asks me in Italian. Probably just in case Lucy might overhear us.
See, astute?
I nod. “We’re figuring it out. She’s skittish, and she’s terrified of what it will mean for the baby.”
“A wise thing considering the nature of her life before now. You will need to be careful with her. She’s strong, but she’s not thinking only for herself now.
That changes a woman’s perspective and how she approaches things.
” There’s a quick flash of something in his eyes, and I know he’s thinking of our mother.
Even now, all these years later, he’s still in love with her, despite everything.
It boggles my mind, and I’ve never understood it until now, but I suppose a love that deep never truly goes away, even after a betrayal that deep and cutting.
It’s one of my biggest worries about Lucy and me. What if we get to the end of this entire situation and she realizes that I’m not worth it? That she’s not willing to give anything up to be with me?
“We’re going to take this slow. I think she is going to be good for me, Papa.”
“She will be.” There’s pure confidence in his voice.
“The two of you suit. Just like Alessio and Sienna, and Lazaro and Amara. I want nothing more than you all to be happy and settled down with women that you love dearly. And you’ve all chosen women that will do well.
There will be bumps and hurdles, but we will get through them.
Lucy may be the hardest to convince, but if anyone can do it, it’s you. ”
I appreciate his confidence; it boosts my own.
I give him a grateful smile. “What did you find out from that woman, Janice?”
His smile drops, and his eyes darken. “Nico is getting a hard lesson in not ignoring the goings on of your staff. The woman, once everything around here started happening, searched out any staff members from the other families to offer a way in if they wanted it. Some kind of revenge on Sofia, but also wanting to ensure that her boyfriend had favorable positions as well.”
“She’s dead?”
He nods. “She and one other staff member, a gardner, both worked to let the men onto the grounds and into the house. Nico’s ordered all staff to be questioned, other than Sofia. Who is taking this hard. She feels that she should have known, caught it before it could have happened this way.”
I frown. “Why? She can’t be everywhere at once.”
“You know Sofia. She likes to be in control, and she takes any betrayal under her watch as something personal. Especially since this woman was her staff.”
Yeah, that sounds like her. “I’ll speak with her.” I give him a joking smile. “I always was able to get her out of those moods back home.”
Papa smirks. “I doubt that you’ll be the one to get through to her this time.” The implication is clear.
I scowl. “That fucker isn’t good enough for her.”
“Maybe not, but he is the one that she turned to when she needed comfort, not us. It is hard to see the woman I view as a daughter turn to someone else, but the longer I’m here, the more I understand her choice. Even if she argues that there is nothing permanent that will end up between them.”
I snort. “She really is clueless then.”
He doesn’t answer, just smiles. “We’ll see how things go.
Now, the other thing we were able to find out from the traitors is that they got the two men up to the north end through a back stairway that the staff use.
Nico forgot it existed as his mother apparently only ever wanted it used when they were entertaining. It’s not on any blueprints either.”
“But that’s not the hidden entrance and exit they’re talking about?”
“No. This is something else. I was coming to get you so that we can get to work tonight on finding it, but if you wish to stay with Lucy for now, then I understand.”
“Everything okay?” Lucy’s voice suddenly asks, making us turn to look at her in surprise.
Hell, I didn’t even hear her. She’s holding Soren in the crook of her arm, who is now wide awake and staring at us with an owlish expression.
“Hello, cara mia,” Papa says warmly. “Everything is fine. Massimo has told you that we are looking for a secret entrance in and out of the house in the north wing? We are going to be looking for it, but he mentioned you were talking and I don’t mean to interrupt.”
I watch her in amusement as her face flushes, but she manages not to look away.
Instead, she says, “Ah, no, we hadn’t gotten to that part of the discussion.
There’s another hidden thing in this house?
I guess I’m not surprised.” She looks at me.
“If you need to go and do that, that’s fine.
Soren is probably going to want to sleep again shortly anyway. ”
And it gives her more time to think away from me. It’s a silent statement hanging between us, but there isn’t much I can do about it now.
“You are certain you don’t want help?”
She shakes her head. “I’m going to read more of the journal for now. I like finding secret passages and all that myself, but babies make those adventures few and far between.” She gives Papa an apologetic smile.
“With this house, we’ll be looking for many things,” Papa agrees gently. “Have you found anything in the journal that sticks out yet?”
She shakes her head. “No, not yet. She’s mostly talking about being pregnant and angry that she had to marry Leonardo or have any of us, including her sons.
They hated her, and she didn’t like them much either at times.
I’m at the part where she’s pregnant with Gia and her twin.
Sienna already told me what to expect with that part,” she adds when he gives her a look of concern.
“She was a troubled woman,” Papa agrees.
He eases over to her, cautious, like he’s afraid he’ll spook her.
She tilts her head up to look at him, eyes wary, but I take that she’s not trying to get away from him as a good sign.
He reaches up and gently touches Soren’s little hand.
The baby grips his finger tightly, watching him.
“I think this young man got very lucky indeed with a mother such as you, cara mia. He will never doubt your love, or that you are there for him.” He glances at Lucy questioningly.
“Would you allow me to hold him, cara mia?”
Lucy blinks in surprise. “Ah, sure. He’s all changed now so he shouldn’t get anything on you.”
Papa chuckles, expertly taking him from her.
“What is a little mess between men, huh?” he coos to Soren, who watches him with rapt attention.
“Yes, you are strong indeed. You remind me of Massimo when he was just as small as you, cucciolino. So curious, always wanting to know what’s going on.
” His smile is warm, glancing at me quickly, before turning his attention back to Soren and Lucy.
My chest warms. This is my father’s acceptance. No words directed at me. Just simply realizing that if things work out the way I hope, Soren will be his family too. Another puzzle piece in my head snaps into place.
I look at Lucy and see her smiling at my father, relaxed. “He’s a good baby,” she agrees. “I got very lucky. Other than the occasional restless night, we have a good rhythm going now.”
“See, as I say, smart. He takes after his mother.” Papa winks at her, and Lucy blushes sweetly.
I nearly roll my eyes at my father’s flirting.
We both know he’s doing it to get under my skin.
“Now, you behave for your mother, cucciolino, yes?” Soren just stares at him, before making a small grunting sound as he kicks his legs.
Papa chuckles before handing him back to Lucy.
He turns back to me. “We are meeting at the top of the steps in the north wing.”
I nod. “I’ll be there shortly.” He nods, says goodbye to Lucy, and heads out the door, shutting it softly behind him.
“I like your father,” Lucy remarks softly. “I should be terrified of him, but he just…he’s calming. I don’t know how to explain it.”
“He always has been. There were times he scared the shit out of us as kids to keep us on the straight and narrow, but for the most part, that’s always how he’s been.
We rarely were ever worried about telling him something.
He was always our go to. Well, him and Aurelio.
” I move closer to her and hold out my hands. “My turn.”
She hands him to me. Soren looks up at me, taking my finger when I offer it to him, gripping it tightly. “He really likes you,” she murmurs, almost more to herself than me.
“What’s not to like? I am pretty great.”
Her eyes roll, and I grin. “Ego. You’re just full of it.”
I shrug, unapologetic. “Now, I have to go, so I’ll see you later.
” I look at Soren. “So you best behave for your mama, yes, ometto?” He just looks at me, tiny fingers flexing on my finger.
I brush my lips over the top of his head and then hand him back to Lucy.
“Think about what I said, cerbiatta. I know you’re unsure, and I know that it’s moving fast, but I’m not going anywhere. ”
She slowly nods, still not looking certain. “Will you let me know if you find anything?”
I let the change in subject go. Patience. Slowly. The two words I’m going to have to repeat to myself many times in the coming days.
“Of course. Once I’m done, we’ll talk about it.”
“I might be asleep, so it’ll have to wait until morning.”
I don’t tell her that I have every intention of making sure that Kida is elsewhere tonight, and I’ll be spending the night in my bed.
No more nights apart. Instead of answering her, I carefully lean over Soren and press my mouth to hers.
She lets out a soft gasp, but she doesn’t pull away, leaning into my kiss.
When I ease back, I whisper, “I’ll see you later, cerbiatta.” I leave without another word, but I can feel her eyes on my back.