Chapter 12
12
AMARA
I wake up slowly, luxuriating in the soft warmth surrounding me. Is this what heaven feels like? Because I can definitely get used to this. I give a soft sigh, nuzzling deeper into the pillow under my head. I don’t think I’ve ever slept on something this nice. When did the hotel get these? I can’t see the manager spending this kind of money.
I open my eyes and still, all my memories coming back in a rush as I realize where I am. I bolt upright in bed, looking around the room that I didn’t really pay much attention to last night. The gothic theme must continue in every room. However, this one feels a little less frightening now that sunlight is shining through the ornate windows behind me.
The floor is the same black marble as the bathroom, and across from me is a sitting area with a mostly black fireplaces and a long mantel. I wonder if it actually works. Then again, something tells me that this place is more for show than actual practical use. There’s also a dressing area, complete with a gold mirror so large it takes up half the wall.
That leaves the bed, and looking at it, I realize it’s a California king. It’s huge. It makes sense though, because Lazaro’s large frame would need something this big to be comfortable.
The thought of Lazaro has me stiffening, as another wash of memories floods through me and what I’ve now told him. Not to mention, the fact that I fell asleep on him instead of demanding another room. Nothing like sending mixed signals. I look over at the other side of the bed, but it’s empty. The sheets don’t look like they’ve been disturbed. I carefully put my hand out and, yep, they’re ice cold. Does that mean Lazaro didn’t sleep here, or that he got up a long time ago and is off doing whatever?
No, he definitely didn’t sleep in here, because I’d have woken up. There’s no way I can sleep in the same bed as a man and not know it. So where the hell did he go?
The sound of running water finally penetrates my thoughts, and I whip my head around to stare at the closed bathroom door. I swallow hard. Okay, so he didn’t leave. How the hell did I sleep through that? I mean, I know I was tired, but I never sleep so deeply that I don’t sense someone in the room.
I want to get out of bed and run the hell out of the room before he comes back out, but where am I going to go? Besides, there’s no way in hell I’m leaving this room dressed only in pajamas. If I run into someone, they might take it as an invitation. Lazaro might be a good man who won’t take advantage, but I’m in the heart of a mafia Don’s home, and I doubt that all the men here would follow Lazaro’s lead.
It looks like I’m stuck here.
It takes another ten minutes before the door finally opens and Lazaro walks out, his hair and beard still damp from his shower. He is wearing only a new pair of suit pants, carrying the rest of his clothes in hand, and his eyes quickly find mine. I try not to let him see the embarrassment I’m feeling, but the only thing I see in his eyes is concern and relief.
“How did you sleep?” he asks, setting his clothes on the end of the bed before he starts to button up his pants.
I somehow manage not to stare, but it’s close. Damn it, I really need him to get dressed, because a woman can only take so much. “Like the dead,” I admit. Guess it’s time to ask the question that’s burning in my head. “Did you sleep here with me?”
“I slept on the chaise in the sitting area.” He says it so nonchalantly that I’m not sure if I’ve heard him right. I glance past him to look at the chaise, and frown.
“How?” I blurt out. “That thing is way too short for you to sleep on comfortably.”
“I’ve slept in worse places, colombina ,” he assures me with a smile.
“But…but why didn’t you just sleep in the bed?”
Wait, what? What did I just ask? Again with the mixed signals, Amara.
His expression turns serious. “Because that would have upset you. You deserved to sleep for one night without worrying about me disregarding your wishes. So I slept on the chaise, and checked on you if you started to stir or seemed like you were having a nightmare. After everything you told me, I wanted to be close.”
I stare at him, unsure I’ve comprehended what he’s just said correctly. “You did?” It’s the only thing I can think to say, even while my heart does something funny in my chest, and my belly does the same. It’s stupid to be so affected by a simple answer, and one that I should be happy about.
His expression softens slightly. “Yes.” He grabs his shirt, slipping it on and distracting me all over again. What is so sexy about a man buttoning up a shirt? And why the hell am I attracted to it?
My fingers itch to push his hands away and do it myself. Instead, I curl them into the bedspread, and say, “Thank you. I-I appreciate it.” Then, because I feel compelled to, I add, “I’m sorry I dumped that all over you last night, Lazaro. I shouldn’t have. I was just tired and?—”
“I’m not,” he interrupts quickly. I arch a brow at him. “Not sorry, that is. There is nothing that you can’t tell me, Amara.”
That is such a heavy statement, but somehow, I think he means it. “Uh, thank you. Look, I know that you stayed in here with me last night, and thank you for that, but I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. Just because I told you everything doesn’t mean I need to be fixed or whatever.”
“There’s nothing about you to fix, so I agree.” He grabs his suit coat, slips it on and then places his hands on the end of the bed. “Everyone is waiting to meet you downstairs, so you better get up and get dressed.”
It’s an abrupt change in subject, but it gets me moving. Shit. I have to meet the rest of his, and probably my, family today. I scramble from beneath the sheets, crawl over the bed to the other side and rush into the bathroom, ignoring the chuckles behind me. I probably look like an idiot but I don’t care.
It takes me a good twenty minutes to decide what to wear. I mean, what does one wear to meet long lost mafia relatives? I tried on a couple of business suits that looked fantastic, but felt too restrictive; then I tried on a few skirts, which also felt stupid, until I finally settled on a pair of jeans. Now I’m standing in nothing but the same black bra I slept in, with no idea what to wear for a shirt. I’m losing my mind.
“I’m here to rescue you,” Rori’s voice suddenly calls out from the other side of the bathroom door. “Let me in before your man out here threatens to break the damn thing down.”
I blink, then move to open the door, hiding my half-naked body behind it. I peer around and see Lazaro looking impatient, but also concerned. “Why the hell would you break down the door?” I demand, irritated.
“Because you didn’t answer me when I called out to you twice,” he informs me tightly. “Rori showed up to check on you, so I sent her.” And from the sound of it, he’s not happy about it.
“And just like I told him,” Rori announces as she and Hades walk in, “it’s a big deal when you’re about to meet a bunch of people you don’t know. So let’s get you sorted.”
“We need to be downstairs in the next twenty minutes,” Lazaro warns.
“Yeah, yeah,” Rori calls out, already moving into the closet. “Holy shit! I wish we were the same size because I’d be stealing some of your new clothes. These are gorgeous.” I shut the door, ignoring Lazaro’s scowl, and walk over to join her.
“Lazaro had them put in here,” I say with a sigh. “He says he got them delivered while we were on the plane, but I doubt it. There is no way someone can get so many clothes in the perfect sizes in such a short amount of time.”
“You’d be surprised what can be done when you’re one of the most powerful people in New York. People are scared enough of Nico that one phone call with the address will have every single store owner in this city moving heaven and earth to keep on his good side. And, Lazaro doesn’t strike me as a liar. Now, we have a lot to choose from. Good choice on the jeans, but now to figure out the top. Also, your boobs are fantastic by the way.” She winks at me.
I roll my eyes, fighting a blush. “Stop ogling me and help me pick a shirt.”
Rori wiggles her brows. “Where’s the fun in that? But fine, let’s see what we’ve got. I can use the inspiration for my next shopping trip.”
It takes all of three minutes for Rori to find the perfect shirt for me to wear. A simple, gray, long sleeved top that’s just the right mix of casual and conservative, with pearl buttons and a lace overlay on the sleeves. The price tag says it cost almost a thousand dollars, and I nearly have a heart attack. “Holy shit!” I screech, horrified. “Take it off, take it off,” I demand Rori. “I am not wearing this. No way in hell. It costs more than my monthly rent for the salon. Find me something cheaper that won’t matter if I rip it or something.”
Instead of helping me take it off, Rori rips off the tag and says, “There, all good. Now, do you want a sweater or something to wear over it?”
I gape at her. “What the fuck, Rori? Now they can’t return it! Are you insane?”
“Nope, because there is no way that a single piece of this clothing is going to be returned. Lazaro bought it for you to wear, so that’s what you’re doing. Don’t look at the price tags. These guys don’t know anything about what normal people like us wear, and to them, this is probably cheap. That suit Lazaro is wearing is at least five times the cost of this shirt, and that’s chump change. Consider it a reward for coming here, and try to enjoy it. When this is all over, you take them with you, and you’ll be the sharpest-dressed hair stylist around. People will be lining up down the street.”
“They should want to see me for what I can do, not what I’m wearing.”
“Amara,” she scolds lightly. “You know very well that image has a lot to do with things, that’s just the way of the world. The clothes will give you a leg up. And you’re not going to want to go back to that same town after this, so wherever you end up next, you’ll already have an advantage.”
I hate that she’s right, and that these clothes feel so nice and fit so well. “Fine,” I mutter, still feeling guilty that Lazaro has paid a literal fortune for all these clothes, and there is no way in hell I will ever be able to pay him back for any of it. It’d take me years.
“Good. Now, put on some comfy shoes, and let’s do your hair so we can get out there before Mr. Grumpy Guts has a conniption.” I snort at that, and she grins. Hades just gives a low groan and moves to lie on the tile floor and take a nap.
Thankfully, it doesn’t take me long to do my hair and makeup since I decided to keep it simple. I wear my hair up in a high ponytail and keep my makeup light and natural. I’m not here to impress; I’m here because I have no choice. I need to remember that.
When we leave the bathroom, Lazaro is waiting impatiently near the door, but when he sees me, his body visibly relaxes. “Let’s get this show on the road,” Rori announces excitedly. “I’ve already had to hold Sienna back from coming up here and disturbing her.” Lazaro ignores her, his focus on me. I try not to fidget under his gaze, and also try not to let the nerves building in my stomach take over.
They’re just people. I’ve dealt with all different kinds in my twenty-seven years, and this won’t be any different. I hope.
When I reach Lazaro, he says, “You look beautiful, colombina .”
“Aurora!” a deep voice suddenly calls furiously from the hall, distracting me.
Both Lazaro and I look at Rori immediately, and there’s a wicked grin on her face. “What did you do now?” Lazaro demands.
She shrugs. “He shouldn’t have pissed me off.” She opens the door and stalks out with Hades at her side, completely unfazed when Alonzo yells for her again.
“Are you sure it’s safe for her to go see what he wants?” I ask Lazaro worriedly. Alonzo sounds pissed.
“She’ll be fine,” Lazaro promises. “No matter what she does, Alonzo won’t hurt her. Hades won’t allow anything to happen either, I’m sure.” He has a point. “Are you nervous, dolcezza ?” he asks me, not moving for the open door yet, just watching me.
That question instantly has my nerves kicking in. “I’m about to meet members of a family I didn’t know existed, including a bunch of powerful mafia men, so yeah, I’m a bit nervous.” Maybe that’s sassy, but I can’t bring myself to care. I mean, surely the man must realize that, with me taking so long to get ready.
“Everything will be fine,” he reassures me. “But if you need an out or a break, just grab my hand. We’ll leave and you can take the time you need.”
“You can’t just leave when your boss and all of them are there,” I argue.
He gives me an amused smile. “ Colombina , I can do whatever I damn well please, and every single one of them will understand. They know you are more important to me right now.”
Uh oh. The man hasn’t been listening. “Lazaro, I already told you, I can’t give you what you want.”
Instead of answering, he takes my hand and pulls me closer to him before leaning down to press a kiss to my forehead. “You can do anything you set your mind to, Amara,” he murmurs. “You’ve already done it, and you’ll keep on doing it, because that’s just who you are. We’ll take things at your pace, but I’m not going anywhere. When you need someone to hold you up, or be where you turn when it gets to be too much, you’ll know I’m there.” Then, with another gentle kiss to my forehead, he pulls away, takes my hand, and guides me out of the room.
I’m too stunned, too shaken, to dispute it. Something inside me shudders, and a lump forms in my throat. I don’t know what to call the emotions swirling inside me, but I don’t try to fight them either. Maybe I should. Maybe I should be telling him no, he’s just going to end up disappointed, but I must be a glutton for punishment because all I do is grip his hand tighter and follow him through the maze of hallways to the main stairs.
Once we’re on the main floor, we cross the foyer and take the hall to our left. I take everything in with wide eyes. It looks totally different now that it’s the middle of the day; a bit less ominous, but still dripping in money and power. When we reach a door with two men standing outside it, Lazaro stops and tells them, “This is Amara Stanley.” Both men nod, as if that’s enough information, and then tip their heads at me respectfully before they face forward again.
“Hello,” I say carefully. That’s it? They get my name and then just go on about their day? If this is how my life is going to be from now on, this is going to be one dull and drab place after all.
Lazaro opens the door, but conversation in the room doesn’t stop. There are ten or more people in here, and none of them have noticed us. My mouth drops open when the large — though not as large as Lazaro or his brothers — and terrifying-looking man behind the desk barks, “I’m going to shoot your ass if you don’t shut the fuck up. Alliance be fucking damned.”
“Boo Bear,” another man exclaims dramatically. “I know you’re upset that I’m engaged now, but I need you to control yourself a little bit. Your wife is right there, and she isn’t aware of your never-ending love for me.”
I’m sorry, did I just hear one of these men call the other Boo Bear?
I can’t see the man who said it because of everyone in here, but I know whoever it is, is in the middle of the room somewhere, since that’s where the other man is glaring.
“It’s okay, Alessio,” the woman in the man’s lap says with a grin. “I’m happy to loan him to you when he’s being a pain in the ass. Maybe you can be the one to work that out of him by being a pain in his instead.” She lets out a laugh when the man holding her says something in her ear and then kisses her like a man possessed. Clearly someone does not agree.
“He’s going to kill you,” another female voice says in exasperation, but I still can’t quite see her. Is this the other cousin Lazaro mentioned? “Pietro, if that happens, do I still get to live in your fancy castle?”
There’s a honeyed chuckle and then a smooth, Italian-accented voice replies, “ Cara , I will gladly kick him out now if you prefer. You’re so much prettier, and much smarter to talk to.”
“You can stay in his old room next to mine,” yet another Italian voice declares. “We’ll become the best of friends.” There’s the sound of hand smacking against a head, and I hear Lazaro give a low chuckle, which gains attention.
Within seconds, the entire room is facing us, and it takes everything inside me not to turn and run. The tension in the room is so immense that I grip Lazaro’s hand in mine like a lifeline. How do you not buckle under it? I keep my head up by sheer force of will, and keep my expression blank.
I can do this. I can do this.
“Great first impression,” a new voice says wryly. I turn to see an older version of Lazaro step forward. He gives me a warm, welcoming smile. His hair is starting to turn salt and pepper, but his beard is still that same dark black color. He has more lines on his face, but there’s a kindness to him that has me smiling back at him. “Welcome, Amara,” he says, stopping next to his son and holding his hand out to me. I pull mine from Lazaro’s, and then blush when he kisses my hand and winks at me. “I’m Aurelio Cattaneo, this one’s father. If he ever gives you any problems, you just let me know and I’ll straighten him out.”
“Nice to meet you,” I say shyly when he lets go of my hand.
“You have your own woman to flirt with,” Lazaro grumbles at his father, but there’s no heat behind his words. Aurelio ignores him and steps back to allow another man who approaches to greet me.
This is Don Caruso. It has to be. The way he carries himself, and the power surrounding him, broadcasts that this is not a man you fuck with, ever, but the smile he gives me is warm, welcoming, and gentle. It’s disconcerting. I feel like I should bow or something, but he simply takes my hand as well, kissing the knuckles with sparkling dark eyes and says, “Welcome, cara mia. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you. Please ignore this craziness. My sons like to annoy each other like young, misbehaved children.”
Oh, the charm is thick, and I can’t help but smile at him, despite feeling another blush warm my face. “Hello,” I say shyly. “Nice to meet you.” He’s not as large as Lazaro, but he’s definitely over six feet, and unlike most of the other men in the room, he’s clean shaven.
Slowly, more people come forward, though I notice quickly it’s only the men, not either of the women. They hang back, and my stomach curdles. Looks like I was right, they’re not happy I’m here. I force myself not to look at them, and focus only on the men in front of me.
I meet Massimo and Zeno, two of the Caruso brothers, and both of them take my hand to kiss it sweetly, flirting and shooting grins at Lazaro when he grumbles at them. Massimo is the most different from his father and brothers in looks, but he still has the same charming and powerful vibe to him as the others. He shares their height, standing a couple inches over six feet, but has dark blonde hair and hazel eyes. His features are also a little softer, but the beard seems to give him a bit of an edge. Zeno also has dark blonde hair, but his dark eyes and features are all Pietro.
Then I meet Alessio Caruso, who gives me a beaming grin. He’s a younger version of his father, with a slightly thicker beard. His dark eyes are bright as he says, “Nice to meet you, Amara. Don’t believe a thing that Lazaro has told you, or anything Nico tells you, either. He’s pining for me, and hides it behind that grumpy exterior.” He shakes my hand, then winks.
Well, that solves the mystery of who called Nico Boo Bear. I glance over at the other man, who is glaring at Alessio, before I turn back to Alessio and smile at him. “Sure, that’s the look of a man pining,” I chuckle.
“He’s gotten very good at hiding it. You should have seen the tears the other night when I went to get Sienna her engagement ring. He was so overcome with regret and grief, he was ready to end it all.”
“I was ready to end you , get it fucking right,” Nico barks.
“Liar,” Alessio mouths, giving a sad shake of his head.
“Better get used to it, this is a common theme between the two of them,” one of the women says with a sigh as she moves forward. I take her in, feeling a sharp blast of shock to have a face so like my own looking back at me. Her eyes are hazel where mine are green, and she’s about an inch taller than me with a fuller figure and defined muscles. “Hi, Amara, I’m your cousin, Sienna,” she says with a warm smile, holding out her hand. “I know this is a lot, but I really am so happy to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you,” I say with a shy smile of my own. I feel so uncertain, like I don’t know what to do or say. “It is a lot.” As if on cue, Lazaro moves to stand behind me, his hand resting on my back in a silent show of comfort and support. I should step away, not blur the lines any more than they already are, but I can’t make my feet move. Sienna glances up at Lazaro, her smile widening and her eyes full of amusement.
“Things will get easier now that you’re here and can get to know us,” Sienna assures me. “But it doesn’t hurt to have someone in your corner when you need a break.”
Alessio moves closer and wraps his arms around her, pulling her back against him. “I’m always in your corner, coniglietta ,” he assures her, kissing the top of her head.
Sienna’s lips twist into a wicked grin. “I meant Gia and Sofia,” she informs him. He says something I can’t quite catch, but by the flash in her eyes, she likes what she’s hearing.
Before I can stop myself, I blurt out, “It sounds like he has someone else in his corner, and you might need to be prepared to share him.”
The room erupts into laughter, including Lazaro, but when I glance over at Nico, his scowl only deepens. Uh-oh. The woman on his lap, that I’m assuming is Gia, is grinning from ear to ear. “Ignore him,” she tells me. “He’s a bit of a Grumpy Gus.” Between her and Sienna, it looks like Gia and I are the most similar in height, body shape, and hair color, though her eyes are dark unlike Sienna’s hazel and my green. At least there’s a way to tell us all apart. She pushes up off her husband’s lap and rounds the desk, with Nico right behind her, sticking close. “It’s really nice to meet you, Amara,” she says warmly. “I know this is a lot all at once, but I promise you’re safe here. I’m Gia Armani.”
“Thank you,” I say simply.
Nico eyes me, not saying anything until Gia tilts her head up at him and gives him a pointed look. Guess he’s not the social type. “Nico Armani,” he says after a moment, holding out his hand to shake mine quickly. He doesn’t offer anything else, and I fight back the urge to shuffle my feet. Just like Pietro, Nico has the air of being the man in charge. He’s over six feet of lean muscle, dark hair and eyes, a five o’clock shadow that covers his jaw and upper lip, and a look about him that says you don’t want to meet him down a dark alley late at night.
I can’t tell if he just doesn’t like me or distrusts me, so I just nod and step back. Lazaro is right behind me, his hand on my back in comfort once again. “Nice to meet you,” I say politely. “You have a lovely home,” I say to him and Gia.
“It’s dark and scary, but I actually kind of like it,” Gia admits with a knowing smile. “Sienna’s trying to convince me to warm things up, but I like them the way they are.” She gives Nico a loving smile. “Though I do have a few plans I’d like to put to use once everything is settled.”
I watch Nico’s expression change as he looks down at her with nothing short of adoration. This man is clearly deeply in love with his wife. “You know you have carte blanche to do whatever the hell you want with this place, topolina ,” he reminds her gently. Gia beams at him, not even glancing back at me. Okay, so those two are sickeningly in love, got it. It’s sweet, really.
I look up at Lazaro and see him watching me with concern. I smile at him, and he relaxes. “You’ll meet Sofia soon,” he tells me. “She runs this place, and is no doubt busy scaring all the staff.”
Sienna scoffs, and I turn to see her wicked grin widen even further. “You keep thinking that,” she taunts. “But we all know she’s getting busy with Dante while you’re all in here distracted.”
I look around in amazement as the Cattaneo and Caruso brothers all lose their grins and the tension in the room explodes. Aurelio and Pietro share a knowing look, but say nothing.
“I’ll kill him,” Massimo vows, already turning for the door.
“Not if I get to him first,” Urso declares, dashing for the door with Zeno right behind him.
“Enough.” Pietro sighs in exasperation, making them all stop. “Sofia is a smart woman, and if anyone will kill the man, it will be her, if he even thinks to break her heart. We have other things that must be discussed.”
“That’s our cue to spend some time together,” Sienna announces with a grin. “Amara, I really want to talk to you about my hair. I think I want some color in it.”
“Oh, me too!” Gia says excitedly, both of them hooking their arms through mine.
“Ah, sure,” I reply. This is an easy topic, even if my nerves are jumping through the roof at the thought of being alone with them. They seem very nice, but things can change. I almost wish Rori was here to give a buffer.
“Hold on,” Lazaro says, stopping us. I turn to see him moving behind us. “You’re good, colombina ?” he asks, his gaze direct.
If I say no, I’m going to insult Gia and Sienna, and that wouldn’t start us off on the right foot. So instead, I just smile. “I’m fine, Lazaro.”
He holds my gaze for another long moment before he steps forward to the door, opening it. “Go with them. If anything happens to them while they are in your care, you will die a slow and painful death,” he tells the two men that we passed on our way in earlier.
Both men nod their acknowledgment, their expressions never changing even at that threat.
“Lazaro,” I say, horrified. “You can’t threaten people like that.”
“I can and I will when it comes to your safety,” he replies unrepentantly. He steps forward, and both Sienna and Gia release me, smiling. Then he reaches down, grips my waist, and lifts me off my feet and up to his eye level. “If you need me, all you have to do is tell the guard and I’ll come,” he promises me softly. “Okay?”
I nod, unable to do anything else, so enraptured with him. I don’t even care that this probably looks ridiculous. “I’ll be fine.”
He smiles. “I know you will.” Then he leans forward, and despite thinking that he’ll kiss my mouth, he kisses my forehead, sets me on my feet, and then turns away to walk back into the room. I stare after him for a long moment, confused at why I’m annoyed.
“Oh, yeah, we need some girl time for sure.” Sienna snickers. “It’s late enough in the day, I think we can add wine to the discussion.”
“And I have just the spot,” Gia agrees. They once again link arms with me, and then we’re off.
I glance back but can’t see past our two guards. I know I said that we couldn’t be anything, but why do I miss him already?