3. Azalea
3
Azalea
I was surprised someone answered the phone at Saville Trucking. It was almost seven o’clock.
“Yes, I’m calling to verify Brandon Jacobs’ employment.”
He was the last one on my list.
The sweet young lady patched me through to the manager, who gave me all the information I needed. Brandon worked there, he’d been there consistently for six months, and he was doing fine.
Once the call was over, I wrote that up in his case file with a smile. I love when my clients are on the right track. Makes my job easier.
I powered down my computer and headed out. Luckily, my apartment was just a short drive from the office. Ten minutes after I left work, I arrived home.
And parked next to Roman’s car.
The Mercedes idled, going silent only after I was out of my car and walking toward the stairs. Yes, I pretended I didn’t see him.
He wasn’t part of my new reality.
“Azalea!”
Well, I had to stop now.
He approached me carefully, his eyes sad, his work clothes disheveled, a box in his hands. It was a new look for him, a man who’d always been cocky and unmoved by everything. Even my tears.
“Hey,” I called out. “Did you need something?”
He held up the box. “You left a few things.”
“Yeah, stuff I didn’t need.”
He shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “Can I come in and put this stuff down?”
I turned and made my way up to my second-floor apartment. I’d hoped to have the evening to myself, but that was shot to hell now.
Once inside, Roman set the box down and got to what we both knew was the real reason for his visit.
“So, you really did it.”
I looked around, trying not to smile too big. “I really did.”
He leaned against the wall as if he needed the support, resting his sweaty bald head on the new eggshell paint. “You know, even when you said it was over, I didn’t really believe you.”
“Why?”
He shrugged. “I thought it was a threat. I mean, it’s not like I cheated on you, Azi. All of this feels like a big fucking overreaction.”
I didn’t respond. There was no point, because I was done explaining myself. He’d never listened anyway, except right before I left, when he suddenly figured out how to give me what I’d been asking for. Funny how that works.
He didn’t cheat, that was true. Not that I knew of. What he did was way worse. He lied. For years.
One thing I’ll never understand about men is how they can decide who to be, and then pretend to be that person for however long it takes to get what they want, until one day, you wake up next to the real him, and he’s a complete stranger.
Roman acted like a man with love and compassion and empathy. He pretended to support me. He cast himself in the play of my life as the man who would do anything to make me happy, and I believed the performance. He was that good. The day he broke character was the day he broke my heart.
“Thank you for my stuff,” I said pointedly. I watched his face fall, but now I was the one who was unmoved.
I love hard, but once I’m done, I’m an ice queen.
“So that’s it?” he said. “It’s really over?”
“What were you expecting when you came here? For me to change my mind, pack up, and move back with you tonight?”
His shoulders dropped. “I don’t know. I’m still throwed that you really left.”
Relaxed now, I set my purse on the table and took a seat on the couch.
He looked around. “Where are the dogs?”
“At my Pat and Mina’s. I didn’t want them getting in the way.”
He nodded. “So, you’re good? You don’t need anything?”
“I started my new job.”
It was strange, sharing my new life with him like this, but I was bursting with excitement about my future. Since he was suddenly interested in my life instead of his Xbox, I decided to humor him a little.
He walked over and took a seat next to me. “How’s that going?”
I didn’t hide my smile. “Well, it’s already better than Tucker.”
He scoffed. “You say that about everything.”
“What do you mean?”
“The next thing is always better with you.”
“Well…it’s true. It always is.”
The pained look on his face almost made me apologize, but then I remembered I had nothing to apologize for. I wasn’t the one who caused our relationship to deteriorate. I’d always been honest. I’d always been myself. Annoying, naive, innocent, gullible…call it what you want, but I’d always been exactly who I am and expected the same thing from others.
I still had the capacity to love, and I would love the next man wholly and truly.
Roman missed out. Now, he was nothing to me but my brother-in-law’s best friend.
Cold world.