20. Azalea
20
Azalea
"Look, guys! It’s Mommy?”
Pinkie and Brownie didn’t give a single damn about my portrait, but I showed it off anyway. I was proud of it. Touched by it. And even though I hadn’t mentioned it to Isaac, I was proud of him, too. His skill was undeniable. But if he didn’t want to talk about it, I would leave it alone.
My portrait took up residence in a coveted spot—right next to the picture of my babies on the beach in Destin.
Bursting with excitement, I retreated to my office and dialed the one person I knew I could talk to about my new…situation.
“Hey, Azalea!”
“Hi, Mommy.”
The voice of Mrs. Whitney Davis never failed to lift my spirits. But I was already on cloud nine, so hearing her just reminded me I wasn’t alone up here.
Being a consistently chipper black girl can be an isolating experience.
“I was thinking about you earlier. I have some presents for the babies.”
I laughed at that. My mother treated my dogs better than I did. Called herself Nana and everything.
“Maybe soon, your sister will give me some human grandbabies.”
“Don’t do that,” I scolded playfully. “They’re taking their time.”
“And I’m not getting any younger. I’m getting finer, but not younger.”
“Period.”
Amina once told me she thought me and our mother were the two dumb bitches telling each other Exactlyyy . I thought she was playing, but it had been stuck in my head ever since.
“Mina called me the other day complaining. I told her to take that mess to her husband. It’s just love and light over here.”
I closed my eyes, shaking my head at the fact that I was back in the middle. The one place I hated to be.
Those two were oil and water. Most times, I couldn’t even tell what they were upset about. They just clashed, and I was caught between them, being pulled in both directions until I snapped.
“I wanted to talk to you about something,” I said, changing the subject.
“You okay?”
“I’m great, actually. I’m, uh, kind of…seeing somebody.”
“Already?”
My mother was always excited about the prospect of me getting married. It could have been Roman, who she liked well enough, or it could have been my local gas station attendant. As long as I was happy and she got to throw me the wedding of our dreams.
“It came out of nowhere, honestly. Well, not nowhere. I met him at work.”
“Is he a probation officer, too?”
“Actually...” I cleared my throat. “He’s a former client.”
Silence.
And then, “Wow.”
“I know. It’s not ideal, but—“
“Is he…rehabilitated?”
“He is. Not that he was in for anything bad. He’s not violent, just made a few mistakes.”
“Okay…”
“I can’t talk to Amina about it.”
“Oh, absolutely not.”
“I guess I just want your honest take on it.”
“Does he make you happy?”
“So far. He’s not perfect, obviously, but I like him. He’s smart. Soulful. Romantic.”
“I’m not hearing anything I don’t like so far.”
“Really?” I closed my eyes and smiled in relief. “So, you think it’s okay?”
“You said you were great, so I think it’s more than okay. You know I only care that you’re happy.”
“ Thank you. I feel like Amina would just—“
“Girl, you know you don’t have to explain it to me. Of course you don’t want her storm cloud raining all over everything.”
“Right? She’s so negative.”
“Perpetually. Listen. Protect your energy, child. The last thing you wanna do is let her get in your head.”
“I know. Thank you, Mommy.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Is Daddy there?”
“He’s down there cooking. Trying to make gumbo.” She cackled. “It’s the thought that counts, I guess.”
“Tell him I love him. And I love you, too.”
“I will. Love you, baby.”
Buoyed by the conversation, I smiled to myself. It was really all the encouragement I needed.
The next day, I met Henry in his office after lunch. He had the biggest one, of course, but he hadn’t made much use of the space. I’d have filled it with pictures and posters and books. All he had were a few sad certificates and a framed picture of him with the police chief.
“So, what’s this about, Davis?”
I took a seat and a deep breath to calm myself down. “Okay. I have this idea I’ve been kicking around in my head.”
That was quite the understatement. It was actually fully mapped out in my head, and on paper, and on my Pinterest board. But he didn’t need to know all that.
“I wanna do some work in the community. Non-profit. I’m envisioning a program where I reach young folks before they get into the system.”
When Henry chuckled, his freckles danced around his face. “So, you wanna put us out of a job, huh?”
I laughed nervously. “It does sound like that, right? But no, of course not. I just think—“
“I was joking.” He clasped his hands in front of him on the desk and leaned forward. “I like it. Are you looking for involvement from this office?”
“Maybe. I don’t have it all worked out yet. I just wanted to bring it to you and make sure there are no conflicts.”
He shrugged. “Sounds like good PR to me. As long as you’re working on it on your own time, I don’t see an issue.”
I clapped my hands together. “Perfect!”
“You know, Chief Brown told me you were a delight.”
I chuckled at the sound of my old supervisor’s name. “I’m almost positive he said it a different way.”
Henry bellowed out a laugh. “Okay, fine. His exact words were, ‘she’s aggressively enthusiastic about everything.’ But, you know, tomato, tomahto.”
We shared another laugh before Henry got serious.
“Listen, I want you to know we’re glad to have you here. I happen to be a fan of enthusiasm. It’s hard to come by in Corrections, as I’m sure you know. So, keep up the good work, Davis. You’re appreciated.”
“Thanks, Henry.”
“Oh, and that transfer went through. Thompson is picking up your guy. Jackson.”
“Right. Good.”
His brow furrowed. “You didn’t put down a reason on the paperwork. Is everything okay?”
“Did I overlook that section? Sorry. Should I go back and fill it in?”
“It’s fine. Was there a problem?”
“No. Just…incompatible.”
His eyes narrowed, but he let that pass.
“Well, let me get back to it,” I said quietly, trying not to let my guilt bleed into my voice.
As I walked back to my desk, I realized I had already undone all the goodwill I’d just earned with my boss. If he ever found out the real reason I transferred Isaac, it could be the end of my career.