Chapter 3
3
I was relieved that I’d already organised after-work drinks with Liv so I headed straight from the office to one of our favourite bars and after we’d grabbed a bottle of wine to share, we found a table by the window and I filled her in on Hayley’s New York bombshell. As well as the fact Jake had been behind me when I had talked to her about my love life earlier.
Liv took a long gulp of wine before responding. ‘Well, we don’t for sure know that Jake overheard you…’
‘He made a comment about the weather being dry in New York!’
She tried not to smile. ‘If that was intentional, maybe he has more of a sense of humour than we thought.’ She saw my glare. ‘Sorry! But even if he did overhear, he’s not going to tell Hayley. Your love life isn’t any of their business. It has nothing to do with how well you do your job. Which is pretty damn well,’ she added, confidently, tossing back her dark, shoulder-length hair.
‘I hope you’re right,’ I said uneasily.
‘And besides, he has more important things to worry about than what you say in the office. He has to try to save his career, right?’
‘That’s a good point,’ I agreed, feeling a tiny bit better. But then I sighed. ‘I just wish it wasn’t me that has to help him do it, you know?’
‘There is one bit of good news, though: I’ll be in New York too, remember?’
I looked across at her, my heart lifting. ‘Oh, I forgot! Yes! You’ll be at the conference too.’ Liv’s publisher had organised for her to be on a panel and meet readers there. It was a huge relief that there would be a friendly face around. ‘That helps but seriously…’ I leaned forward and eyed my cousin. ‘How can I be with Jake Richards for five whole days on my own? He intimidates the hell out of me. I mean, why does he intimidate me so much?!’
‘Because you love his books and he’s easy on the eyes. Also, he has that whole moody creative guy thing going on… Don’t tell Aiden I said that,’ she said.
‘Plus, he’s ten years older than me and is so blooming confident,’ I grumbled. I didn’t feel anywhere near enough like a fully-fledged adult yet.
‘I don’t know,’ Liv said. ‘Maybe he’s not as confident now as he used to be – these past few months can’t have been easy. He might lose everything he’s spent ten years building after what he was caught saying.’
‘Maybe. I still wonder why he said those things. Just to look good in front of those crime authors?’
‘Maybe you’ll find out on this trip.’
I took a sip of wine. ‘And then there’s the question of why should I help save the career of a man who is completely ungrateful about it? If he hates romance, then readers should bloody hate him.’
‘I’m as passionate about romance as you but I think Hayley is right. You need to think about yourself and your career. If she’s seeing this trip as a chance for you to prove to her you can be an agent yourself one day, then you should go ahead and prove it to her,’ Liv replied.
Worry hit me instantly. Could I prove it to her? ‘What if I can’t, though? Jake Richards not only broke my heart when he slagged off romance books, but half the romance community is boycotting his books now.’
‘Well, that should make you feel far less intimidated by him,’ Liv said firmly.
‘What do you mean?’
‘It’s last chance saloon for his writing career so he should be on his knees begging you to help him. He should be intimidated by you . You are there to help him. You have the control here; he doesn’t.’
‘Wow. Maybe I should see it like that,’ I mused. ‘But I bet he can’t believe Hayley has asked me to go with him. I’m ten years younger, inexperienced at this job, a nobody…’
‘Then you’ll just have to show him you are a somebody. Which you are! Like me.’ She winked.
‘So humble,’ I told her but I smiled. Liv’s cheerleading of me was helping to raise my confidence ever so slightly. ‘You’re right, though; this is for my career so I need to focus on that and how I can somehow turn the tide from everyone being against Jake Richards to being for him again – and not about what he thinks of me.’
‘We do not care what he thinks of you,’ Liv agreed, raising her wine glass. I clinked mine against hers in agreement. ‘And to think we’ll be going to New York finally, after all the times we’ve watched Serendipity .’
I smiled; it was one of our favourite Christmas films and was set in New York. We were a family who watched the same festive movies every year.
‘And I’m staying in the hotel from it!’
‘Oh my God, I need to book me and Jake in there too,’ I said, my eyes lighting up.
Liv clapped her hands. ‘Yes! It will be so much fun.’
‘I’ve always wanted to see the city; I can’t let being there with Jake take all the excitement away for me.’
‘You can make this trip what you want, Freya; you always find the light in whatever you do.’
‘Aw, Liv, that’s so sweet.’
I was happy to be finally seeing the city I’d always wanted to visit – plus, the opportunity it could present for my career. I just wished it wasn’t something I had to do with Jake Richards. Someone it felt like would just ignore all light instead of trying to find it.
After we’d finished the wine, I headed home to Clapham. I shared a tiny, messy flat with three people I’d found online and whom I rarely saw or interacted with. It was all I could afford right now and it made me want to stay out as much as possible or hide in my room. So, I headed straight there once I got in. I changed into my pjs and curled up on my bed, pulling my laptop open in front of me. Then I googled the article that had put Jake’s career into crisis mode.
Readers are stupid for believing in happy ever afters. But I’m happy to take their money anyway.
His words still were a gut punch to my romantic heart.
There were thousands of angry comments on the page from fans of his books, shocked that he didn’t believe in the romance he wrote about. I searched the other articles about it and looked at the various headlines.
Has Jake Richards Destroyed His Bestselling Writing Career?
Why Write Romance If You Look Down On It?
Romance Books Are So Unrealistic, Even Authors Writing Them Don’t Believe In Them Any More.
I sighed when I saw that headline. Romance books were often treated like second-class citizens when it came to books being talked about in the press, Jake saying what he had about them had stoked that fire even more.
Then I went on Jake’s Instagram account and found the apology post that Hayley had helped him to draft after the article caused such a furore.
I was misquoted in that article and have contacted my lawyers about it. I’m sorry if any reader of my books has been hurt by the comments in it. I will always love being part of the romance book community.
Scoffing out loud, I put my phone down and laid back against my pillows. I knew that statement was bullshit. Jake had admitted to Hayley that what the journalist had overheard had been correct so they couldn’t contact lawyers but Hayley told him to lie. I hated that they had done that. It hadn’t helped much, though. Readers had still unfollowed his social media accounts in droves and his publisher was so far refusing to commit to a new contract. Somehow, Hayley had got him into this romance conference and this trip was clearly make or break.
As I rolled over and got ready for sleep, I wondered what the real truth was. Why had Jake said those things? If he believed them, why did he even want to carry on writing romance books? Just for more money? There was a bitter taste in my mouth about having to help him pull the wool over romance readers’ eyes, readers who somehow all felt like friends to me – and all to help my own career. It kind of felt like I was being just like Jake and Hayley. But it also seemed like I had no choice.
I had agreed to go to New York with Jake Richards. Talk about something I would have never believed while I was at university reading his books and dreaming of finding the kind of the love he wrote about. The way he had poured scorn on all of that had really hurt but if he and my boss could be selfish and only care about making more money out of romance readers, I needed to push that hurt away. I needed to be as cold about my own career.
Even if I had never been cold about anything or anyone in my life before. My mum had once told me she was worried that the world might chew me up and spit me out, and as I’d grown up, I’d tried to become tougher. Moving to London and getting this job had helped me stand firmer on my own two feet.
So, I just needed to push my feelings aside and not think about the fact that the person who had been my instruction manual for romance didn’t believe in any of it. Otherwise, I was never going to get through this trip in one piece.
And if Hayley was using this trip to assess my future at the company and my ability to be an agent myself, I had to not wear my heart on my sleeve but be like Hayley and Jake and treat it all as business.
But when my eyes fell on my shelf of romance books, I knew that wasn’t going to be at all easy to do.