Chapter Thirteen
Lorcan
Cody was a great cuddler. He wrapped himself around me and held me tight.
Well, after he’d disposed of the condom and cleaned us up.
I’d drifted in a haze of pleasure as he wiped my cock, belly, and chest with a hot washcloth.
He was even careful to ensure all the cum was out of my chest hair—no easy feat.
Then he’d returned, coaxed me to lie on my side away from him, and he slid in behind me. He pulled me close, kissed my shoulder, pressed his hand to my sternum, and promptly fell fast asleep.
Slumber had been much slower to pull me under.
In the morning, though, I was the first to wake.
Cody still gripped me tightly, but I needed to piss. Instead of continuing to revel in his warmth, I slid from his grasp and padded to the bathroom. After making my bladder happy, I gazed into the mirror.
I don’t look any different. I feel like I should look different. Because my entire fucking world just shifted. Not so much the sex—although that was definitely a part of it. No, everything had changed because, deep in my heart, I felt something I’d believed truly gone forever.
Hope.
Not just hope that I might have a relationship with Cody.
Well, not all about that. Just that my life looked different than it had yesterday.
Some of the bleakness was gone. Blown away by two mind-altering orgasms. Wrapped in the security of someone who called me sweetheart and held me close.
Suddenly, the world was full of possibilities.
That we might form some kind of bond. All the doubts that crowded my mind yesterday— I hesitated.
They weren’t gone. Not entirely. But they’d receded.
Had given way to optimism. To even a touch of happiness. Something I’d believed gone forever.
“Hey.” Cody eased himself into the room. “You okay?” His blue eyes radiated concern.
“Yeah.” I tipped my head up to meet his gaze.
He stroked my cheek. “You were gone a while. I thought you’d come back to bed.”
“I was gone that long?” Have I really been staring at myself for such a time? Wincing at the crow’s feet and feeling a little on the pudgy side? “Sorry.”
He kissed my nose. “I didn’t want to intrude—you deserve privacy. The other bathroom is yours, okay? If you’re in there, then I know to leave you be.”
“And what if you want privacy?” His offer felt almost too generous.
“I’ll close myself in the room with the washing machine.”
I laughed. “Would you even fit?”
He appeared to consider. “Well, if I stood sideways, it’s entirely possible. I’d just have to be careful not to knock any of the hoses.”
His easygoing manner disarmed me. Any negative thoughts fled from my mind. “I adore how your mind works.”
I would’ve sworn his eyes softened as he offered me his most charming smile. “Well, I adore you too. So I’d say we’re doing well. Do you feel like a walk?”
After a moment, I cocked my head.
“I thought we could walk down to Fifties and have breakfast.”
The flash of pain came in an instant, and I ruthlessly pushed it away. “I’d love to go to Fifties. They make the best breakfast.”
“They do.” He held my gaze. “Although you can order any food at any time.”
“I could. But I think a burger for breakfast might be a little much.”
He tweaked my nose. “Yes, for sure. We should shower first.”
“Can I give you a blow job?”
His eyes widened, and he cleared his throat. “Well, I’d never say no to that offer.” He grinned. “I’ll go piss first and you can get the right temperature for the water.”
“Perfect.” I moved to the large shower and turned on the faucet.
As the water heated, I forced myself to stay in the present.
To not think about the fact that my ex and I used to go to Fifties every week.
How I hadn’t been there even once since Stephen left—even though they made the best burgers in Cedar Valley.
When the water was hot, but not scalding, I stepped inside the shower.
I stood under the spray to wet my hair. Whatever shampoo Cody used would be good enough for me.
I wasn’t picky that way. Yet something else that differentiated me from my ex—he always chose the most-expensive version of everything.
I never understood the reason for the extravagance.
But he contributed to paying the bills, so I didn’t complain about his spending.
“Let me wash your hair?” Cody offered me a wicked smile as he stepped into the shower.
“Uh…sure.”
As he grabbed the bottle of shampoo, I turned my back to him.
The most heavenly scent filled my nose as he rubbed the shampoo into my hair.
“Okay, what’s that scent?”
“Rose Hips.” He scrubbed my scalp. “We’re scent-free at the ranch—because you never know who might have sensitivities or allergies—but I can enjoy my shampoo. The conditioner doesn’t have a smell, so the rose is gone by the time I get out of the shower.”
I sighed. “That’s the best scent.”
“I alternate between this and lavender. I tend to use that at the end of the day.”
“Right. Because it helps you sleep?” I could never keep these things straight.
“That’s right. How does this feel?”
“Glorious.” And my nose wasn’t the only thing paying attention. While the scent was making my senses sing, my cock was perking up at the feel of Cody’s strong hands in my hair.
“Turn around and I’ll rinse you.”
I did as bade and positioned myself so he could wash the glorious scent away. “I want some of that.”
“The giant retailer across the street. Good price.” He grinned as he directed the water through my hair. “You’re not worried about a girly scent?”
I cocked my head. “Are you? If you didn’t have to get rid of the smell, would you go out smelling like roses?”
He grinned. “Hell fucking yes.”
“Right. And you think I’d be different?”
He considered. “Good point.”
I shrugged. “Although I’m less likely to have coworkers who are allergic. Construction sites have all kinds of smells.” I grinned. “Will you let me wash your hair?”
“Sure.” He appeared amused.
“I’m not that short.” I jutted my chin.
He pressed a hard kiss to my lips. “Nope, you’re the perfect size.”
My insides turned warm and gooey. “I’ll wash your hair. I want to luxuriate in this scent a little longer.”
We switched places, and he wet his hair. Then he turned his back to me. I ran my hands down his back, using my blunt fingernails. At the base of his spine, I spread my hand and grabbed his ass.
He giggled. “You’re going to want a piece of that, I’m thinking.”
I stilled. Do I? Am I brave enough to top? I cleared my throat. “Yeah…someday.”
He reached his hands around and grasped mine—holding them in place. “Only when you’re ready. I’m just saying I’m always available.”
I chuckled, squeezed, then eased his hands away.
I pressed myself against his back. “You’re too good to me.
” Before he could respond, I grabbed the bottle of shampoo.
Within moments, I rubbed the pink liquid into his hair.
The fragrance filled my nose with the most beautiful scent.
I cleared my throat. “I think my grandmother had a rose garden. It’s… a vague memory.”
“That sounds like a nice memory. My family didn’t have time for frivolities like that. We kept vegetable gardens. I remember picking fruit from a young age. My mother didn’t want me to learn canning, though. I was meant to do manly stuff.”
“That’s such bullshit.”
“Yep. Aunt Genessa taught me. In the summer, I grow vegetables on my balcony. Not really enough to can, but sometimes I buy fruit from the market and make jam.”
“Turn so you can rinse.”
He did, and our gazes met.
I smiled. “That is so very cool. I eat a lot of processed food. I know it’s bad for me, but I just can’t bring myself to care.”
“I’ll change that. We can do Fifties once in a while—and they’ve got some vegetables on the menu—but I enjoy cooking. Don’t do it as often, since I live alone. If I had someone to cook for, I can guarantee I’d do it more often.”
“I used to cook.” I gestured for him to tip his head back so he could rinse his hair. “I enjoyed preparing a meal. Because—” I stopped abruptly.
“Because you were doing it for him.” Cody angled his head back, and the shampoo washed away.
“You’re always so insightful. It’s like you’ve got a window into my mind.
Into my soul.” I should’ve been worried.
Was he just insightful or was he using his therapist hat on me?
Still, I didn’t sense malice or even that he saw himself better than me.
He just seemed to understand in a way I didn’t.
I grabbed the clear-colored conditioner.
“Maybe if we each do ourselves, we’ll be quick.
Because I really want to give you a blow job.
” I traced my hand down his chest to his cock—nestled beautifully in pubic hair just a shade darker than the hair on his head.
I grazed it with the back of my knuckles.
He moaned, grabbed the conditioner, and dumped a dollop in his palm. He thrust the bottle back at me.
I laughed and repeated everything he did.
Within a couple of minutes, we were free of the rose-hip smell.
I tried not to mourn it, but also made a note of the brand.
If the stuff wasn’t too expensive, then I’d get a bottle for myself.
With scent-free conditioner. That way, if Cody ever came over and we needed to shower—
My mind skidded on that one. My apartment was dark, dank, and depressing.
The view was nonexistent, and the couch was uncomfortable.
Why would you ever invite him over when he has this amazing place?
The answer came swiftly. Because I don’t want him to think I’m just with him because of this wonderful place with the stunning view.
He tipped my chin. “Second thoughts? Fifties awaits.”
I smiled. “And miss tasting you? No fucking way.”
“Okay.” He grinned. “I’m kind of excited myself. Here, or the bed?”
He was worrying about my knees again.
“Here.” I grasped his flanks and, as I lowered myself to my knees, trailed my hands down his ass, squeezing again as I settled. This wasn’t the most comfortable position—but I’d definitely endured far worse. Idly, I traced the muscles of the top of his foot.
He giggled. “What are you doing?”
“Worshiping you.” I didn’t meet his gaze. “You’re almost God-like to me. I know that sounds cheesy, but it’s how I feel. Like you’re invincible.”
He wound his hand through my hair, but didn’t force me to look up. “I’m just a man, Lorcan. No better or worse than any other.” He paused. “Well, I’m better than your ex, I think.”
I laughed, although the sound caught in my throat.
“Yeah, you are—although that’s not a high bar to clear.
You see me. In a way no one has for a very long time.
Perhaps ever. And it’s not just the puppy thing—although that’s a lot of it.
It’s that you don’t see through me. Or past me.
You make me feel like I have value. Again, it’s been a very long time since I felt that way.
” I skimmed my fingers up his ankles to his calves.
Strong. Solid.
His knees were a little knobby, which made me smile.
I applied pressure as I ran my hands up his muscled thighs.
He must do some kind of workout because these are spectacular.
And speaking of spectacular… All my musings had, apparently, been an aphrodisiac to him.
Or just my hands all over him. I grasped the base of his cock—which stood out—and licked the tip.
He tightened his grip in my hair.
Taking that as encouragement, I pulled his crown into my mouth. I swirled my tongue around it and then speared his slit.
“Jesus, sweetheart. Keep that up and I’m going to come.”
Well, that’s the point, isn’t it? I smiled even as I sucked him in deeper. He hit the back of my throat, and I pulled back before I gagged. Then, with my hands firmly gripping where his ass met the top of his thighs, I set to work.
Blow jobs were something I was good at. And not just because Stephen told me so.
I could make him come in very short order.
That said, I enjoyed prolonging the pleasure.
Sinking into it myself, because I loved the smell of man and the taste of precum on my tongue, but also because I’d get hard myself.
My cock would demand attention even as I sucked the guy off for all I was worth.
Well, not the guy. I’d hardly done this with the strangers I’d hooked up with thirty years ago. This was something special. Something I’d given freely to my scummy ex who didn’t deserve it. Something I intended to do with Cody every chance I got.
I sucked harder, hollowing my cheeks.
“Oh God. I’m coming. Pull off if—”
I doubled down on my efforts—this time pulling him down as far as I could.
He came. Spectacularly. He stiffened and then spurted cum into the back of my throat.
I tried to swallow without choking. As with last night, his orgasm seemed to go on and on.
He stroked my chin, even as his breathing returned to normal.
Shit. Now I have to stand.
Even as I had the thought, he bent and grasped me under the arms. He guided me up to my feet.
For a slender guy, he was surprisingly strong.
He grinned, grasped my chin, then dove in for a toe-curling kiss.
Apparently he liked the taste of his cum, because he sucked my tongue into his mouth and then proceeded to clean me thoroughly.
He grasped my cock.
My eyes shot open to meet his gaze.
He cocked an eyebrow.
Mutely, I nodded.
Five tugs later and I shot my load into the hot spray. I sagged against him, even as I pondered over how pruny we’d be when we got out of the shower.
He nipped at my ear. “That was the hottest thing ever. Well, except fucking you in my bed last night. That was pretty spectacular as well.”
I grinned. Then I nipped his stubbled jaw. “For me too.”
“Do you want me to shave, or are we good to go as is?”
I stroked his chin. “Whatever you want.”
“But…?”
“Well—” You need to be honest with him. “I kind of like you shaved. All that smooth skin.”
He grinned against my cheek. “You sort clothes and I’ll shave. If you stay naked in here with me, then it’ll be more like brunch by the time we show up.”