Chapter Three
With the excruciatingly embarrassing dance at last over, Phoebe found Lord Gabriel had drawn her hand neatly into the crook of his arm, whether she wanted it to be there or not, and that he was now walking her sedately around the edge of the dance floor.
Just for the moment, no one was dancing but, nevertheless, a horde of people, all unknown to her, milled about, chattering in couples.
Every single one of them looked a hundred times more at home than she felt.
And she was quite sure they were looking at her and thinking she shouldn’t even be there.
The sensation of sticking out like the proverbial sore thumb was enormous.
But…a gentleman, her perfect gentleman in fact, had asked her to dance, just like all the other young ladies.
And now he hadn’t just escorted her back to Aunt Fanny but was intent on ignoring the fact that his toes must be bruised and instead was promenading her about the room as though it was something he truly wanted to do.
As though he viewed her as the sort of young lady he wanted to be seen with.
But did he really, or was he just performing a duty?
How silly she was being just because the handsomest man in the room had asked her to dance.
She was in danger of allowing herself to get carried away.
Of course he was just being polite, as she knew full well she hadn’t distinguished herself well in either the dance or the required conversation.
Aunt Fanny had better not get her hopes up.
She cast Gabriel a shy upward glance. He was at least a foot taller than she was.
Not a difficult feat as she was barely an inch more than five feet tall.
She thought again how handsome he was with his curling golden-brown hair and his perfectly formed features.
Of course, she’d noticed all that about him straightaway when she’d been observing him from her position beside Aunt Fanny.
Who wouldn’t have?
She might be small and insignificant and appallingly clumsy with everything she did, but she wasn’t blind.
And nor was she immune to a handsome gentleman showing interest in her, even if she did suspect it might be either because of her fortune, or because he felt sorry for her.
Probably the fortune, but, whatever the reason, he was a feather in her cap to boast to Mattie about later, as he was far more handsome than Lady Chatteris’s son.
Not to mention at least six inches taller and with a slim but muscular build.
“Do you find this less alarming than dancing?” he asked, his tone a little amused.
She might as well go on as she’d begun and be honest. After all, he’d said he liked her honesty, hadn’t he?
She had to assume he’d meant it. She took a breath.
“Yes, thank you. I much prefer it to having to strut and bob and skip like some performing monkey while being watched by my aunt in case I put a foot wrong. Which of course I do, and she knows very well that I will. So why she bothers to watch, I really don’t know, as it’s a foregone conclusion.
” Quite a relief to get this off her chest as Aunt Fanny would have silenced her after the first few words and been shocked by the reference to the performing monkey.
Would have reached for her smelling salts, most likely.
Those blue eyes of his danced with amusement. She could have drowned in them. “Are you this self-conscious when you practice at home?”
She nodded, trying hard not to blush but failing miserably. Why was it blushing was something one couldn’t control? Best to ignore it. “Oh yes. It’s not just being at a ball that’s rendered me so clumsy. I’m like it much of the time. I was born clumsy, Aunt Fanny says.”
Although that wasn’t quite true. She’d become a lot clumsier since she’d come to live with Aunt Fanny, and indeed, had mastered horse riding back at Coakham with no problem at all.
Papa had said she had a natural seat. She’d never been clumsy around a horse.
But that wasn’t much use at a ball. Not many horses at balls unless you counted the carriage horses waiting outside, and no one was going to let her ride one of them.
It quite surprised her how easy he was to talk to.
Although she was probably saying too much and Aunt Fanny would accuse her of being impolite and silly.
However, the relief of being able to be honest about how she truly felt was running away with her.
And on top of that, a tiny hope had already taken root that he was being so kind to her out of more than ordinary politeness.
Could it perhaps be because he liked her? She could but hope.
Aunt Fanny had drummed into her that the Season was all about finding a husband.
She’d told her firmly that one should be polite and sweet to any gentleman who showed an interest, and not monopolise any conversations.
On the contrary, one should be sure and ask all about the gentlemen, because they liked above all to talk about themselves.
And one should show an interest in everything a gentleman said, and hope that he would show an interest in one in return.
But…was this quite what Aunt Fanny had meant by taking an interest?
She would probably strongly disapprove of the confession with which she’d vouchsafed him.
In fact, she might have a fit of the vapors if she discovered Phoebe had confided how much she didn’t like balls to the eminently eligible son of a duke.
A smile twitched his mouth. “Don’t tell me you are as clumsy in other things as well? Although that would be quite charming, I’m sure.”
More annoying blushing at his suggestion her clumsiness could be charming. He was very good at saying the right things.
She might as well come clean. “Aunt Fanny says in everything. She chides me that I can’t write a letter without blotting the paper.
Not once, but several times. In the school room my hands were always stained with ink.
And if I’m given a cup of tea to hold, there is a great danger I will drop it.
And if there is an ornament in a room, however well hidden, the chances are that if I am in the room for long, I’ll manage to break it.
My aunt despairs of me.” At least, this had been her life for the last three years.
So much so that she’d almost forgotten those halcyon days when she hadn’t been so plagued by clumsiness.
He chuckled. “That is a veritable litany of disasters, I must admit.”
For some reason she wasn’t offended by his amusement.
“I must assure you, my lord, that none of this is funny when it happens. My aunt has taken to putting away her most treasured possessions lest I manage to knock them over, and watches me like a hawk if we are invited to visit her friends. I must own it’s very stressful for me, because being watched, as I am tonight, only serves to make me far worse.
Your toes must surely provide the evidence of that. ”
His smile became a rueful grin. “They are in agreement with you.” He paused and rubbed his smooth chin.
She wondered how fair his beard might be should he allow it to grow, and that only made her blush more. Hopefully he might mistake her pink cheeks for her normal coloration.
He smiled. He had a delightful smile, wide and carefree as though nothing at all ever worried him, and it made his eyes twinkle in the reflected light of the chandeliers.
Oh, to be like that. He laid his free hand over her captive one.
Its warmth sent a delightful tingle through her body.
“Might you be better if you were to dance all alone? I mean, just with me in an empty ballroom. Might you like to do that?”
Good heavens! Of course she would! The thought of dancing with him like that brought fresh heat to her cheeks.
She must look as though she’d had her head in a bread oven.
She couldn’t quite be certain if the blush was caused by his words or because she’d decided she very much liked him.
She didn’t want to admit it was the latter, as surely, she would be disappointed when the only time she’d ever see him again would be across a ballroom, when he was dancing with some other young lady who wouldn’t leave him with bruised toes.
She gathered her well-scattered thoughts, preparing the inevitable excuse.
“Unfortunately, I fear it would make no difference. My clumsiness is not something I can control. I must have been born like it, although it seems to have worsened with age. Of course, my dear mama didn’t chide me for it the way Aunt Fanny does, and together we found it quite funny.
But, after she died, which I must hasten to point out was not due to any of my clumsiness, in case you were thinking it was, my new governess, Miss Hailsham took over for a while.
She was remarkable for her patience with my continued insurmountable problem.
” She didn’t add that Miss Hailsham’s scolding had exacerbated the problem, and Aunt Fanny, with her constant surveillance and irritated tutting, had only made it ten times worse. That would have been disloyal.
A young couple similarly promenading around the room approached them.
The man was tall with curling brown hair and eyes so dark as to have been almost black.
These managed to bestow upon him a rather sinister air that reminded Phoebe of someone else she’d seen that evening, as did the haughty smile that curved his lips in something approaching a sneer.
He might have been almost as handsome as Gabriel, had it not been for his supercilious air and the coldness of those eyes.
The young lady on his arm was somewhat horse-faced, with wide, admiring eyes fixed on her beau.
She looked like a vacuous idiot. Not that Phoebe would have said that to anyone, but she was allowed to think it.