CHAPTER 13
ADDY
I literally ran from my temporary room at the penthouse, later that evening, having taken a shower and changed. The guys had suggested it, probably because they were sick of me just pacing back and forth anxiously, stressing them all out too.
It was almost nine P.M. and still Asher and Eli weren’t home. We hadn’t heard a word from them all day and I had received no reply to the numerous texts I had sent to them.
“Are they back?” I called before I even got to the family room, desperate to walk in there and find my brothers exhausted but home safe.
“Addy, slow down!” Kane barked as I hurtled into the room. I stopped when the only people in the room were the guys I had left there not ten minutes earlier – Adam, Jordan, and Kane. They were trying to look relaxed, kicking back on the sofa and Kane in the big armchair, all of them focused on some basketball game playing on the television, but they didn’t fool me. They all looked tense and on edge, just as I felt, and Adam was doing his nervous habit of tapping his hand against his thigh.
“Nothing yet, princess, but I’m sure they’re fine,” Jordan tried, and failed, to reassure me.
“Maybe I could just call Max. I know he can’t help us from Nevada, but maybe he could give us some contacts for better representation for Ash and Eli. Do we even know who Asher hired? They could be terrible attorneys,” I argued, not for the first time in the last few hours.
“Come on, baby. It’s Asher we’re talking about. You know he already hired the very best lawyers he could get,” Adam sighed as he got to his feet and approached me. He took my hand and pulled me back to the sofa he’d just vacated. “Just sit down and try to relax. They’ll be home soon, I’m sure.”
“I thought you were getting into your PJ’s?” Jordan asked as he took in the jeans and sweater I had pulled on after my shower.
“No. I need to be ready if they call and need us,” I argued. “Or maybe we could just…”
“No. We’re not having this argument again. We’re not going to the police station. Asher wanted you kept here, so here is where you stay,” Kane snapped, cutting off my request. To be fair I had been suggesting the same thing for several hours now, so I guessed they were all pretty sick and tired of saying no to me.
“Anything else from Harris and the others?” I asked instead.
“I already told you I’m back in charge of security now!” Kane snapped again. He was still pissed from waking to find out Asher had appointed Harris to do his job, and he had very quickly corrected that with some raging calls earlier in the day.
“I meant about the investigation? Maybe they found something that could help Asher and Eli?” I clarified as I threw him my most pissed off glare. I was sick of his foul mood. He had done nothing but snap at all of us, all day long and it was really starting to grate, especially mixed with my anxiety over what my brothers were going through at that moment.
“Aleks called me earlier. They’re still tracking financials to get a full list of names for party attendees. Some of them were cleverer than others with how they paid the entrance fee, hiding the money in complicated transactions to hide their identities. Those are probably the ones that pose the biggest threat to you, so we need to know who they are,” Adam explained.
“Maybe we could set up a trap? Make them think they can get to me, then catch them in the act?” I suggested. The idea of putting myself at risk again terrified me, but we needed to find some way to just end all of this chaos. I honestly didn’t know how much more I could handle. I hated what it was doing to my brothers too. They were in police custody, for heavens sakes! They had calm peaceful lives before I came along and messed it all up!
“You mean use you as bait?” Jordan questioned as he sat forward and looked at me with a hard stare. “That is never happening, Addy.”
“Damn fucking right it’s not. What the hell are you thinking?” Kane growled.
“I’m thinking that I want this over with! How can I ever find any kind of normal with all of this going on? How can any of us?” I threw back at him, my words filled with anger.
“We will end it. The last thing anyone needs is you trying to play hero, and fucking it all up!” Kane hissed.
“Kane!” Adam barked angrily.
“Well, what do you want me to say? She has these insane ideas and all she’ll end up doing is getting herself fucking kidnapped and hurt again!” Kane got to his feet mid-rant and started to pace back and forth.
“That’s enough, Kane!” Jordan snapped as I jumped to my feet and stormed towards Kane. I threw out my hands and shoved him as hard as I could. He stumbled a little, but didn’t move much.
“Get myself kidnapped? Is that what happened to me? Like I wanted to be taken? Like I was begging to be abused and raped! Is that what you mean, you asshole?” I screamed at him as I shoved him again and again. My eyes were glassy but I refused to allow the tears to form. I was too pissed off to show any weakness.
Kane grabbed my arms to stop me from shoving at him and I heard him take in a deep breath.
“Addy…” he began, but I wrenched myself free of his grip and backed up a few steps.
“Fuck you, Kane! Fuck you!” I screamed, then I turned and left the room, desperate to get to the solitude of my bedroom and behind a locked door.
I just got the door slammed shut behind me and locked before Kane reached the other side. He called my name as he tried the door handle.
“Addy, open this door, right now!”
“Get lost Kane!” I threw back knowing it made me sound like a sulking teenager.
“We said no more hiding,” Kane threw back. “What the hell do you think this is?”
“Yeah? Well, you said you’d stop being an asshole! That hasn’t worked out so well for you today has it?” I yelled back.
“Addy? Open the door for me, honey. Kane’s gonna stay out here and cool off,” Adam said more calmly.
“I’ll be out in a while. I just need to do something,” I called back to him. “I’m okay, Adam,” I added, knowing he and Jordan would be worried about me locked in this room again after my last meltdown.
“Do what? Are you sure you’re okay?” Jordan asked.
“I’m calling Max. He might be able to find out what’s going on and I need to know,” I replied. “I’m really okay, though I might throw my first ever punch if I see Kane’s face again!”
“Okay. We’ll be waiting in the living room for you,” Adam returned and I let out a sigh of relief that they were leaving me in peace.
I was just so angry. Angry with Kane for being just awful to all of us all day. Angry with all three of them for stopping me from going to my brothers when they needed me. And most angry at my sperm donor for causing all of this hell for all of us! It should be him who was sat in a police station, not my brothers who hadn’t done a single thing wrong.
I pulled my cell phone from the pocket of my jeans and looked for Max’s contact. He had contacted me a couple of times in the time I’d been in New York, just to check in and see how I was doing. He was a good man and I was grateful to him for caring about me even when he wasn’t being paid to. Now I just hoped he could help me again.
“Max Kline,” he answered on the second ring.
“Max. It’s Addy.”
“Addy. Sorry. I didn’t look at the caller ID. How are you?” he asked, sounding his usual upbeat self.
“I’m okay, but I could use your help. I’m sorry to bother you, but I just don’t know what else to do,” I admitted nervously.
“You’re never a bother. Tell me what’s going on?”
“Asher and Eli, the police came to take them in for questioning early this morning. Do you know about what’s happened here? About their…our father?”
“Yes. Asher called me a few days ago. He filled me in on everything and asked for some contacts for attorneys in case he and Eli were taken in. He knew the police would likely try to tie them both to the crimes at the house,” Max explained. I let out a little sigh of relief at knowing Max recommended the representation. That meant that Ash and Eli’s attorneys were likely good at their job, at least.
“Asher and Eli aren’t back, Max,” I explained, my voice breaking as tears fought for escape. “It’s been hours and we haven’t heard anything. I’m worried they’ve been arrested and I just…I didn’t know who to call, except for you.”
“Is somebody with you, Addy?”
“Yes. I’m okay. I’m just worried for my brothers. They didn’t do anything wrong. This is all a mistake,” I murmured as I fought to keep it together.
“I know. I want you to leave this with me, okay? I’ll make some calls and see what I can find out,” he offered, and I did cry then, unable to hold it in, overcome with relief that someone was doing something to help Asher and Eli.
“Sorry. I’m okay,” I sniffled. “Thank you, Max.”
“Of course. Try to get some rest. I’ll call you as soon as I know anything,” he assured me.
I thanked him several more times before I said goodbye and hung up. At least Max might be able to tell me something of what was happening. Once I knew how much trouble my brothers were in, then I’d decide what to do next. It was time for me to take care of Asher and Eli and no one, not even Kane was going to stop me.
JORDAN
“Okay. We’ll be waiting in the living room for you,” Adam said, agreeing to leave Addy alone, locked in her room. My heart was pounding too hard in my chest as he hooked his arm around my neck and pulled me back down the hall and into the living room.
“We shouldn’t leave her. Last time…” I began to argue.
“Last time she was upset and in a bad place. She sounded calmer tonight. We can’t make her feel like she can’t make her own decisions, brother, no matter how much her being alone terrifies us,” Adam told me and I understood what he meant. Addy was vulnerable at the moment after all she’d been through, but she was still an adult who had spent her entire life surviving alone. She’d not only raised herself from a young age, but she’d also taken care of her bitch of a mom and worked to earn the money they needed to live as she got older.
Behind all of the pain and anxiety caused by the horror she suffered, she was a pretty independent soul, and she wouldn’t appreciate us barking orders at her – well not most of the time anyway. I had noticed the way she seemed to relax just slightly when Kane or Adam told her to do something, when she was struggling to cope. It was like it took some weight from her shoulders when they took control when she couldn’t. But most of the time she was defiant and liked to try and stand on her own two feet.
But knowing all of that wasn’t allaying my fears about her once again being behind that locked fucking door. When she’d been in there the day before I had been scared shitless, and seriously considering the idea of climbing down from the roof terrace to get to her, right before she unlocked the door. Images of her hurting herself had run through my mind constantly and I had actually been afraid to walk in the room, terrified of what we’d find when we were finally able to enter. The idea of us all going through that again had me panicking, and I had no doubt that my brother felt the same.
I had believed her when she told us all how determined she was to keep going and find her feet again, the night before, but there was still this wild panic inside of me that she would forget all of that if she sank deep enough into the darkness that seemed to haunt her. I could not loose her. I was falling for her, so fucking hard and I couldn’t stop it, not that I wanted to.
The more I got to know her, and the more she allowed her true self to show through, the more I wanted her. I loved when she smiled and laughed, and she was sexy as hell when she got pissed and angry, just as she had with Kane before. She had fire inside her, even after all she’d been through and that amazed and captivated me.
“Where the fuck is she?” Kane asked sharply as he appeared from the direction of his room.
“You are such a fucking asshole!” I barked as I turned to face him, rage boiling in my veins at the way he had spoken to Addy earlier. I considered punching the bastard, but Adam beat me to it, walking right up to Kane and laying him out with one swift punch to his face.
“What the fuck?” Kane yelled as he lay sprawled on the floor, blood trickling from his nose.
“You ever speak to her like that again and I will fucking crush you!” Adam hissed, quietly, but filled with rage.
“Yeah? Try it, fucker,” Kane smirked as he got to his feet and squared up. He was no match size wise to my brother. Adam was a huge fucker with several inches and about thirty pounds of pure muscle over Kane, but I still didn’t know who’d win if they had it out. Kane was highly trained and he knew some martial arts shit. He was also fast, probably much faster than Adam.
“Enough!” I intervened as I got between them. “We’re not putting Addy through you two fighting like kids in the fucking school yard.”
“Why would you talk to her like that? You know what she’s been through. Why do you have to be such a fucking dick to her?” Adam demanded as he stepped back and took a breath.
Kane grabbed at some tissues from a box on the side table and wiped at the blood on his face. Thankfully, it looked like the bleeding had stopped already, so his nose wasn’t broken.
“She was being an idiot. Why would she think we’d ever use her as bait?” Kane threw back as he glared at my brother.
“She’s scared, not just for herself, but for all of us. She just wants the threat gone,” Adam explained.
“Well she’s stupid if she thinks she can end it.”
“Call her stupid once more and I’m gonna lay you out this time!” I warned.
“I don’t get you, man,” Adam sighed as he shook his head. “It’s so fucking obvious you want her, yet you treat her like crap. It’s like you want to hurt her?”
“Of course I don’t want to hurt her! I just….she gets under my skin, okay? I don’t even know why I say half the shit I do when she’s around.”
“Because you want her, like Ad just said. You have feelings for her and it freaks you out. She told me you kissed her,” I cut in.
“You kissed her?” Adam turned to Kane with a mix of anger and confusion.
“It never should have happened. Me and her…it can’t happen.”
“Because of some bullshit promise you made to Asher, right?” I questioned, and he looked to me with surprise. “Yeah, she told me about that too. She wants you too Kane. She wants all of us. She just doesn’t know if she can have us.”
“It seems like you two have talked a lot,” Adam remarked.
“We have,” I shrugged. “I made my feelings for her clear from the beginning, and she told me she has feelings for all three of us. I’ve been talking to her about the possibility of all of us being together if that’s what she wants.”
“I thought as much,” Adam nodded.
“What? Are you insane? I said I like Addy. I’m not into you two assholes,” Kane snorted dryly.
“Fuck! I’m not into you either! What I was proposing was the three of us being with Addy…just her and not each other,” I clarified. Fuck, Adam was my brother! And the thought of Kane putting his hands anywhere near my dick had me shuddering.
“What did Addy say to this idea?” Adam asked.
“She said she wants to be with us all, but she’s afraid she’ll never be able to be intimate with us after everything. I told her there was no rush to get to that. I begged her to just give things a chance, moving as slowly as she needs to. She was close to agreeing, but she thought you were out Kane and she wanted to talk to you about it all, Adam,” I explained.
“I am out. I can’t be with her and do my job protecting her,” Kane said instantly.
“Then have someone else protect her. She needs you, Kane. She needs all of us. If she’ll let us in enough, we can help her through all of this. We could all have something really good.” I was almost pleading with him to hear me.
“I agree that she needs us. Yesterday, when she was locked in that room, it was your dominant voice that pulled her out. She needs that.” Adam looked to Kane as he spoke, and Kane nodded.
“Yeah. I’ve noticed she responds when you’re firm with her. She argued about the rules we discussed yesterday, but I saw the intrigue in her eyes. She liked the idea of having those rules, but you don’t need me for that. I’ve seen you with her. You can take control when she needs it,” Kane pointed out.
“That’s not the only reason she needs you, Kane. You understand her better than either of us. When things get too dark it’s you she looks for. Her feelings for all of us are strong. I think if any of us walked away she’d always feel like there was a piece missing,” I tried again to explain.
“Seriously though? A relationship between all of us? That couldn’t work. We’re all very different people, and even if we could find a way to get along, Addy’s not ready to handle such a complicated situation,” Kane argued, obviously trying to talk himself out of it.
“It’s not up to us to decide what Addy’s ready for,” Adam cut in.
“No, it’s not.” We all turned slowly and came face to face with Addy. That fire of anger was back in her eyes as she glared at us all. “Having a nice conversation without me?” she asked as she walked past us all and sat in the armchair closest to the fire, curling her legs under herself.
“Sorry, beautiful. We didn’t mean to. It just all kind of happened,” I tried to explain as I went to sit on the sofa in the seat closest to her.
“How much did you hear?” Adam asked.
“Enough.”
“So? What do you say? Are you ready for a relationship with us?” I asked hopefully.
“Jord! Don’t pressure her. We don’t need to talk about this now,” Adam scolded.
Addy’s face turned bright red as she looked between us, then lowered her gaze to her hands where they sat in her lap.
“I…I’d like to try, if I’m honest,” she admitted quietly. “I have feelings for all of you and they’re really confusing, but also really strong. I don’t know how it would all work, or even if it could, but I feel like I should try, if you’re all willing to? I can’t ignore how good I feel when I’m with you guys.”
“I feel exactly the same, princess. It’s like you were made for me and I’m definitely in, one hundred per cent,” I eagerly replied as I reached over and took her hand. She glanced up at me with a shy smile. It was the cutest thing I’d ever seen.
“I’m in too, as long as this is what you want. I’ve been falling for you since the first moment you walked into our kitchen, baby,” Adam told her. She smiled up at him too, the relief on her face clear to see. Then she looked to Kane and all of her anxiety returned.
“I get it if this isn’t what you want, Kane. I know you told me before that…”
“Fuck what I said before,” he growled as he turned to her and stepped closer. He dropped down to his haunches before her and placed his hand over her knee. “Asher asked me about our relationship, so he knows something’s going on. I don’t think he’d hold me to that promise I made, if I spoke to him.”
“He won’t. I spoke with him and Eli this morning about everything. Ash wanted to talk to you and let you know he was okay with us being together, if that’s what we want,” Addy cut in.
“I need to talk to him myself, but, no matter what, that promise will always stand, Angel. I will always protect you. With my life if necessary. I am never going to allow anyone to hurt you again,” he told her.
“What does that mean?” Addy asked nervously.
“I guess I’m in too, but I don’t know if I can make this work. I’m not good at sharing, and since the explosion that took me out of the military, I’m not much of a team player either. I want to try though. If this is the only way I can have you, then I’m going to fight like hell to make it work.”
“We’re gonna need to go slow. I…I don’t know what I’ll be okay with,” Addy said as she looked between the three of us. “Cuddling is good, and I…I was fine when Kane and I kissed, but I just don’t know…if it gets to more than that, I don’t know what my reaction will be.”
“We’ll move at whatever pace you set, honey. You have the power, okay? If we start to move too fast, you need to be honest with us,” Adam cut in.
“I can do that,” she agreed. “But you all need to be honest with me too. You need to tell me if it’s not enough and if you want out. I’ll understand, but I need you to tell me. I’ve only ever had one relationship and it wasn’t great.”
“What does that mean?” Kane demanded.
“When I was at college I had this thing with my English lit professor. He was older and married. I don’t even know what I was thinking,” she groaned as she slammed a hand over her eyes, looking embarrassed. “He just showed so much interest in me, and he was kind. I needed that; you know? I just wanted someone to care about me for once.”
“Of course you did. We all need that sometimes,” I agreed. I could understand the way she had felt at that time. Her mom had been an evil, selfish bitch who had stolen Addy’s childhood, and made her be an adult way too soon. Of course she would fall for the first person who feigned care and compassion.
“Ian was nice at first. We used to meet at his office on campus. He’d buy me gifts and he seemed to really care. He’d check in with me throughout the day, ask if I was doing okay, if I needed anything. I’d never had that before.” Addy went on.
“What happened?” Kane asked, growing impatient.
“For a while it was okay…the sex, I mean. He was my first and he took his time. Even though it hurt, he made it feel special for me.” I was surprised at the fiery rage that burst within me at the thought of any other man putting hands on Addy. She was ours and I absolutely hated the idea of any other man, especially some asshole professor, putting his filthy hands on her. I discreetly forced a deep breath in, in an attempt to keep my cool, as Addy went on, “After that we met up at his office a few times, and things were kind of as I expected, not that I knew anything that I didn’t read in romance novels. It wasn’t as amazing as anything I’d read, but I figured it was reality, which can be very different from fiction. It wasn’t the sex I was there for anyway. I just wanted him, his affection and kindness. I liked being that close to him.
“Then one day, he told me he’d booked a hotel for us. I was excited. I’d never even been to a hotel before. I dressed up especially for him, not wanting to embarrass him. He was a wealthy guy and I figured it would be some fancy high end place he was taking me to.”
“It wasn’t, I’m guessing?” I interjected
“No. I was really shocked and kind of nervous when I got there and it was this crappy, run down place. There were some homeless looking guys hanging around the parking lot and outside the front office. I almost left, but I didn’t want to let Ian down. I opened the door to the room number he’d texted me and…well, that night things changed. He was really rough with me. He wanted to act out these scenes, I guess you’d call them?” Addy looked to me with a mix of question and anxiety and I nodded, encouraging her as I squeezed her hand trying to comfort her. “The one he liked most was me coming into the hotel room and him hiding. He’d jump out at me and…I guess he liked to pretend he was like a rapist. I had to try to fight him off and cry and stuff. He was so rough and I usually ended up hurt.”
“Fuck, baby,” Adam cursed as he stood behind Kane looking over her with concern and some anger simmering beneath.
“I kept going back because I didn’t want him to leave me. I know it sounds pathetic, but I didn’t want to be alone.”
“That’s not pathetic, beautiful. No one wants to be alone,” I told her.
“He started booking the hotel room every week for a few months. The last time I went, he accidentally knocked me into a dresser when he tackled me to the floor. There was so much bleeding and it wouldn’t seem to stop, but it just seemed to get Ian excited or something. I begged him to stop, so I could take care of my head, but he acted like it was all just part of the scene and held me down. Afterwards, he just left the room, and I was laid bleeding and crying. I knew then I had to stop. I texted him that it was over, and switched classes so I wouldn’t have to see him as much. He never spoke to me again after that.”
“I want his name,” Kane snapped, startling Addy.
“It was a long time ago Kane, and it was my own stupid fault for going along with it,” she told him gently. “So you see, my relationship history sucks and I have no idea how to make anything work between us,” she went on as she swiped some tears from her cheeks. “But I’m game to try, if you are?”
I looked between Kane and Adam, who both nodded. I could see they were both raging inside at what that asshole, who should have known better, had put our girl through, as much as I was.
“We’re all in, babe,” I told her with a smile.
“Okay then,” she exhaled with a sigh. “What now then?”
“How about we all curl up with a movie and wait for your brothers to come home?” Adam proposed, easing some of the tension in the room.
“I spoke with Max. He’s going to see what he can find out and call me back,” Addy explained as she held up her cell which was in her hand.
She looked between us all nervously and started to fidget. I knew she was getting anxious about whether we should do something more, now that our relationship was officially in the works. Hell, I was anxious too. All I wanted to do was sweep her up into my arms and kiss her, just the way I had been wishing to, ever since that day in Central Park, what felt like months ago now, but was actually just over a week ago.
“Ash and Eli will be fine. Come and help me get snacks for the movie. If we leave it up to these two we’ll be snacking on Kale and chickpeas,” I joked, animatedly pointing a thumb at Kane and Ad.
“Fine, but go easy on the candy. I don’t want to feel as sick as I did last time we did this,” Addy stipulated as she got to her feet, her cell clutched firmly in her hand.
She was obviously worried sick about Ash and Eli. We all were. If they had merely been questioned they should have been back hours ago. If the cops had tried to pin something on them both, they could have been arrested already, with no way to reach out to us to let us know. I just hoped Addy’s contact came through with some info soon, or Addy was going to lose the control she was fighting so hard to hold on to, and I, for one, did not want to witness the woman I cared so deeply for, breaking all over again. She needed a fucking break and I’d do anything I could to see she was given it.