Chapter 5
“Cherish?” Haylee’s voice cut through the pain in her head, and Cherish looked up to see those deep eyes staring over at her again.
“Yes?” Cherish’s cheeks heated as she fought through the sharp ache above her eyebrow and squinted through the bright lights to see Haylee’s beautiful face. Beautiful? She shouldn’t be thinking that. It wasn’t like her to be distracted.
“Have you seen a doctor about the headaches?” Haylee’s full lower lip was pulled between her teeth, and her dark eyes were so direct, so warm and inviting. Cherish could just fall into—no. She had to stop those intrusive thoughts that had no place in the office.
“They’re just headaches.” Cherish smiled wanly, warmth in her chest at Haylee’s obvious concern. Yes, she could enjoy the camaraderie of colleagues, and that’s all this was. It didn’t mean anything else. It didn’t mean they were friends.
“I know, but maybe they can prescribe you something a bit stronger, to help prevent them from happening so often.” Haylee was certainly persistent, despite the curious rise in her tone as though she were uncertain about being able to show concern.
Cherish adored how insecure Haylee was, and how she tried to brush it under the rug most days. It reminded Cherish of who she used to be, back before she’d started working for the one and only Febe Aarts.
“I don’t have time to waste sitting in a waiting room.” Cherish knew her words could come off as angry, but she truly meant them. With as busy as Febe kept her, she didn’t have time to sit for hours and wait for doctors and their tests.
“Maybe that’s part of the problem.” Haylee’s voice held the hint of an edge of worry.
“What do you mean?” Cherish asked, her chest swelling with annoyance. Why couldn’t Haylee just drop this already? Clearly, Cherish didn’t want to go to the doctor over it, so couldn’t she just leave well enough alone?
Before Haylee could respond, Cherish’s phone rang. She pursed her lips as she snagged the receiver off her desk when Febe’s name lit up across the screen. She would never miss a call from Febe. Hands down, that would be the worst thing possible, which was partly why she couldn’t find herself in a magnetic tube that would take pictures of her insides for hours.
“Exactly that,” Haylee mumbled and returned to her work, her chin turned down to avoid Cherish’s gaze.
The pinch of Cherish’s eyebrows made her hesitate for just a second before she shook her head and spoke into her phone. Cherish didn’t have time to worry about it.
Work called.
Febe called.
“Yes, Ms. Aarts?” Cherish threw another quick look to Haylee, but she was entranced by whatever was on her computer screen, her lips rubbing in and out as they tended to do when she was deep in thought. It was honestly adorable, and Cherish was pretty sure that Haylee had no idea she was doing it.
Cherish smiled and relaxed in her chair as Febe's voice filtered through the phone line. “Cherish, you’ve worked with me for years now, and we’ve known each other since we were children. You really can call me Febe, even at work.”
The pull at the bottom of Cherish’s chest tightened again. Anytime Febe mentioned home, anytime they talked about their past or growing up, it always did that. It was the strongest connection they had to each other.
“I prefer to make distinct boundaries between work and home.” Cherish closed her eyes and wished she could take back her words, but it was too late. It was a defense mechanism, and Cherish had very nearly admitted exactly what it was. It had nothing to do with work and home, and everything to do with the woman who ruled the office that her defense mechanism protected.
“I appreciate that, Cherish.” Febe’s voice washed over her the way no one else’s had the power to do. It was the balm Cherish needed every day.
“What did you need, Ms. Aarts?” Cherish cleared her throat, forcing herself back into work mode.
“I won’t be heading back to the office today.” Febe sighed, a heaviness to her tone that Cherish had heard so many times throughout the last couple years, and one that Cherish wished never existed. It was a pure, aching pain that haunted every step Febe took. Cherish wouldn’t be surprised if Febe was pushing herself too much again. “I have another meeting scheduled, and it makes no sense to return just to turn around and leave again.”
“I will make sure everything is locked up properly.” It was the least Cherish could do so that when morning came Febe had everything she needed at her desk, including a sweet treat from Zena Donuts. And while she was there, she’d get one for herself, and maybe Haylee.
“I’ve no doubt about that.” Febe’s voice carried the hint of a smile, and it made Cherish’s skin tingle.
She loved hearing those words of praise. They were rare, but always a delight. Cherish held them close, even being so childish as to write some of them down in her journal when they’d been younger and keeping them as a reminder of all the times Febe paid attention to her.
The thoughts she’d been having about Haylee were nothing compared to this. They were simple appreciation for a coworker who knew how to do her job and to bring a little sunshine and warmth into the otherwise icy office. It didn’t matter if they were packaged beautifully or not. Haylee might be pleasant to look at, but this feeling that Cherish harbored for Febe was entirely different.
There was no way Cherish could even toy with the idea that she could like Haylee in any other way. How could she settle for someone who could never be what Febe was to her? She and Febe had so much history. It was impossible to igno—
“Cherish, are you there?” Febe’s tone, edging on impatience, snapped Cherish to attention.
“Of course, sorry. I think the reception must have dropped for a moment,” Cherish lied, knowing the only connection that dropped had been her own concentration.
“All right,” Febe said, trusting Cherish as she always did. “I hate repeating myself, but in case you didn’t catch it, I need you and Haylee to find suitable candidates for Precious’s clients.”
“Certainly.” Cherish jotted down notes, refusing to get distracted by the small smear of food in the top right-hand corner of her notepad as Febe pointed out what she should look for.
“I’ll start interviewing the short list next week.” Febe’s breathing quickened through the phone, as if she was walking someplace swiftly.
Cherish had to strain to remember where Febe had gone, the full force of the migraine pain coming back and blocking that information from being retrieved. God, she hated when they got this bad. “We’ll have them ready for you.”
“Thank you, Cherish. Be sure to have some time for yourself over the weekend.” Febe always said that, despite knowing that Cherish wouldn’t do it. It was some sort of sick inside joke that the two of them shared.
“Of course, Ms. Aarts,” Cherish responded as Febe expected her to, fulfilling every single obligation she had.
“I’ll see you on Monday.”
“Have a wonderful weekend, and I look forward to seeing you again next week.”
The dial tone clicked in her ear, and she sighed. That was too much, wasn’t it? Cherish bit her tongue. She shouldn’t have added so much sunshine into her tone. She should have saved that for Haylee. It fit Haylee better.
“Does she know?” Haylee asked, her voice quieter than Cherish could remember it being in quite a while.
“Know what?” Cherish stared at Haylee, trying to work out what on earth Haylee was thinking about. But the pounding migraine and lack of working medication in her system wasn’t helping anything at the moment. She just wished she could think clearly for one full day.
“That um…well…” Haylee smiled, discomfort filled her eyes and color blossomed on her cheeks.
Intrigued, Cherish leaned forward, not wanting to miss anything Haylee said. She’d never seen Haylee quite so demure before. Now this was enchanting.
“Does she know how you feel about her?”
A burst of heat rushed upward inside of Cherish’s body. Embarrassment hit her full force. What the hell had she done to let the world know? She’d hidden the damn crush for years. Her tone was biting when she answered, “Excuse me?”
“Oh.” Haylee's eyes widened, and her mouth formed a round circle. “I—I’m sorry. Of course, I won’t tell anyone. I thought it was sort of obvious with how you talk to her and well…” Haylee’s face crumbled as she searched for words that seemed to have been lost. “Oh God. I’m so sorry, Cherish.”
“Obvious?” The word caught in Cherish’s throat. She barely managed to get through all the syllables. Cold rushed through her now, turning her palms into a clammy, sweaty mess. It hadn’t been this bad since she’d walked in on Febe and her brother—no, she couldn’t think about that right now.
“Well, yeah. I mean, I can totally understand having a crush on her. She’s hot. If she didn’t scare the shit out of me, I could definitely see the attraction.” Haylee’s lower lip quivered nervously. Was Haylee just as scared of Cherish?
Cherish opened her mouth to reprimand Haylee but quickly snapped it closed again. No one had ever picked up on her feelings for Febe. Not once in all the years they’d really known each other. No one except her brother, Stuart.
Not when they were younger and Febe was dating Stuart, not when Febe asked her if she would like a job and Cherish packed up her entire life and left the country for the city. No one had ever known or noticed. Not Febe. No one.
“I’m really sorry.” Haylee looked as though she were on the verge of tears.
Emotions swirled and tangled inside of Cherish’s chest, barbed wire curling around her heart and squeezing until large red drops threatened to plummet down into her stomach. She took in another raspy breath and focused on what she could control in this very moment.
“Ms. Aarts will not be returning today and has tasked us both to cull the search for Precious’s replacement. While she will interview the short list of candidates and have the last say, we are responsible for the hire.”
Haylee froze, her eyes widening. Cherish was sure it was because of the stark turn in conversation from the personal to the professional, but Cherish had never been someone to talk about the personal. Never. Only with Stuart.
Haylee bit her lip so hard it turned white before she popped it out and dropped her gaze to the desktop. “Oh, okay. When do we need to have the short list ready?”
“By Monday.”
“What?” Haylee sneered, as though a foul odor had wafted through the office.
“If you would prefer to leave on time and do whatever your weekend plans are, then go. If you’ve come up with a reasonable list of résumés, it shouldn’t be too hard to accomplish, now should it?” Cherish glared at Haylee, putting every ounce of discomfort she had into it.
Haylee puttered around on her keyboard before stopping and staring at Cherish again, her eyes wide and all-seeing. How had Haylee been able to see the crush? Cherish hated it. No one should be able to call her out like that. It was so damn uncomfortable. And she’d been such an ass already in reaction to it.
“Cherish?”
She didn’t want to answer. She wanted to bury herself in work and forget this conversation ever happened. She snapped out, “What?”
“What about our save-the-gala meeting?” Haylee’s lower lip quivered.
“It’ll have to wait until next week.” Cherish wanted to look away. She wanted to stop staring at Haylee, to train herself not to care, but she couldn’t despite Haylee being more observant than she should be about her crush. Cherish couldn’t stop looking at her beautiful eyes, her unwavering search for more.
“I’ll stay.” Haylee pushed back her shoulders, smiled, and gave Cherish a decisive nod.
“Thank you.” Cherish looked Haylee over, an apology on the tip of her tongue that she could force over the threshold of her lips. She forced her gaze away from where Haylee still looked, feigning interest in the notes she had taken for Febe as though she didn’t remember each and every word she had written.
Why was she such an awful person sometimes?
The office had emptied out, and Cherish watched as Haylee shut down her computer and reset her desk, ready for Monday morning. She couldn’t hide the smile from her lips. Haylee had only started doing this in the last few weeks.
Cherish had to stop doing that. Haylee wasn’t Febe. She would never be Febe. Cherish had known Febe for years, and by now, they had a shorthand to be able to talk to each other, they understood each other. Cherish wasn’t willing to give that up, and she wasn’t willing to fall in love. That only led to heartbreak. Febe was a perfect example of that, and Cherish had to protect Febe and herself from something like that ever happening again.
It was late when they sat down in the conference room they had been using for their plans for the gala—except they’d be using it for an entirely different purpose tonight. Cherish had all her notes ready to go, wanting to get the plans underway, though she would have to contact Ms. Ilic again to go through the details with her. But Febe needed Precious’s replacement sorted and what Febe wanted would always take precedence.
“Cherish?” Haylee whispered.
“Yes?” Cherish’s tone was sharper than she wanted it to be.
“I really am sorry. But I promise you that I won’t tell anyone.”
Cherish swallowed the lump in her throat before she could reply. “We have work to do.”