Chapter 34
Cherish couldn’t settle. If she was honest with herself, she hadn’t been able to settle since she got that email from Febe telling her to start interviewing for Haylee’s job. But then realization upon realization had kept every nerve in her body jumping and twitching.
There were so many things that fell into place, but that last piece was still missing. And of course, she held that last piece so tightly it hurt.
But how could she open her hand now when it was so clear she was already too late.
“Ugh.” She screamed into her empty apartment.
She didn’t even have an animal to talk these things out with.
Of course, it would have been cruel to get a dog or cat with how many hours she worked and how little time she actually spent in the shoebox she called home.
“I could have gotten a fish. Something that only needed to be fed once a day and didn’t care if I was here.” She muttered as she paced from one side of her living room to the other.
The knock on her door stopped her two steps before she would have pivoted on her toes and headed back in the other direction. Her heart was in her throat. All the energy she’d been trying to dissipate coiled together ready to burst.
“What on Earth?”
Her heart raced, hope blooming. Could Haylee be here? Then hope turned into a stone that dropped into her stomach. If Haylee was at the door, she would no doubt be there to yell at Cherish. For not helping her, for not believing in her, for all of her hot-and-cold childish attitude. Really, it could have been any of those, or all of them.
The knock came again, and Cherish narrowed her eyes at the wooden door, finally moving her feet toward it. Her fingers trembled as she reached up for the peephole, looking to see who it was, to prepare herself for the onslaught of hell she’d caused.
Stuart.
Cherish unlocked the door and whipped it open as fast as she possibly could.
Stuart held his arms open, as if she’d jump into his arms for a hug. “Hey, baby sis.”
“Stuart?” Cherish blinked, hand still on the handle of the door. What was going on? Was she hallucinating?
“Unless you have someone else that calls you that?” With a wide smile, Stuart stepped closer. The simple gesture cracked Cherish’s hard exterior. She stepped forward and all but collapsed in Stuart’s embrace.
Stuart’s strong arms wrapped around her, and she sobbed into his shoulder.
“I’m such an idiot.”
“Ah, don’t say that. It can’t rain forever.”
With a watery laugh at the expression they had grown up hearing, Cherish pushed herself back out of Stuart’s arms, fingers brushing the wetness left on her cheeks.
“I’m sorry, come in.” She stepped back, but Stuart had already started shaking his head before she had finished speaking.
“No time, baby sis. We need to get going.”
“Going? Where?” Why did Cherish already feel like such an idiot, always the last to know what was going on?
“Well, now, if I told you, it wouldn’t be a surprise.” He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her in for a side hug.
“What’re you even doing here?” She sent him an accusatory look. “I bet Febe called you in because she thinks I’m about to crash and burn.”
“Maybe.” Stuart raised an eyebrow at her. “Are you?”
“No.” She shuffled a half step farther back into her apartment. “Yes. But I’m not going anywhere. I have to figure out what I’m going to do.”
“Do about what?”
Cherish tucked her chin into her chest, her cheeks burning with too many emotions as she looked down at the carpet between her bare feet and Stuart’s boots. “About groveling to Haylee.”
She wasn’t entirely sure what reaction she’d expected, but the raucous laugh that filled the hall outside of her apartment hadn’t been in the top three. This reaction wouldn’t have made the list at all, to be honest.
“So you’re finally ready to admit it?” Stuart chuckled.
“Admit what?” What was he doing here anyway? Was he just here to irk her even more? Cherish wrung her hands together, staring up at her big brother, the only man she’d always admired.
“Oh, so we’re still avoiding. That’s okay.” Stuart shoved his hands into his pockets and rocked back on his heels. “I can wait a few minutes for you to catch up.”
Cherish gave him the best glare she could manage. She pushed her shoulders back and met her brother’s eyes. “You want me to admit that I’m in love with her.”
“Fantastic. So glad we got there quickly.” Stuart grinned broadly and slid Cherish’s arm in his. He started for the door, dragging her along as he went. “Now let’s go.”
“Go where?” Cherish resisted, but only slightly. She did trust him after all, so when he said he was taking her somewhere, she would go. She just wanted to know what was going on. She hated feeling like she was left in the dark.
“Come on.” Stuart gently wrapped his long fingers around Cherish’s wrist.
“Come on where?” Cherish resisted the pull.
“Cherry, if I let you know, you’ll just overthink it, and that’ll ruin the surprise.” He gave her a hard and serious look. “Just let things happen for once.”
“I get you’re here to help me get my life together. Just tell Febe thanks, but I need to do this in my own way. I need to fix what I broke with Haylee.”
“Like what?” Stuart stopped, locking his eyes with Cherish.
Cherish’s mind buzzed static for a few seconds, her mind racing through every conversation and look and touch the two of them had ever shared.
“The bet.”
“The bet?” Stuart’s face curled up as though something entirely foul had wafted down the hall outside Cherish’s apartment.
“It was stupid, I know. But that’s where I messed up. I should never have made her feel like her goals were less than mine. I should have followed up with her. I shouldn’t have been so flipping selfish.” The words rushed out of her. She should be saying them to Haylee, not her brother, but at least she knew what to say now.
“Okay, so you want to help with her goals?”
“No.” Cherish shook her head. “It’s too late. She went and found it herself, without my help.”
“I think I like her already,” Stuart said. “You move too slow for anyone’s benefit sometimes.”
Cherish shot him a withering stare.
“Well, she just might help you get out of that head of yours.”
“She did. She does,” Cherish snapped and regretted it instantly. “Sorry. I just… The bet was stupid, I know that. But there was a condition.” This time Cherish smiled at her own shock at Haylee’s observation of her.
“What was the condition?” Stuart’s eyes glinted, and Cherish knew he would love this, the big sappy romantic that he was.
“These donuts that cost a bucket, but they are so delicious and decadent. I treated myself very rarely, but Haylee…” Another piece dropping into place. “She’s never had one. I just assumed she didn’t care to, but now.”
“Now what?” Stuart asked.
“It doesn’t matter. What matters is that she’s never had one, and they do these special-order ones.” Cherish groaned and ran her fingers through her hair. They were still standing in the doorway, as if on the precipice of staying or going.
“What?”
“It’s stupid, isn’t it? To go buy her a donut?”
“Definitely not.”
Cherish could have sworn Stuart’s eyes were shinier than they had been just moments ago.
“Oh it is. It’s not enough,” Cherish whined.
“She knows you, right?” Stuart’s tone took on a placating quality. “Then she would understand what it means for you to do something like this. Yes?”
“Yes.” Cherish smiled and nodded. Haylee would understand that part at least. But Cherish knew that the donut was more than just food. It had to come with words and confession and apology. She had to crack herself open for Haylee in a way she’d never done for anyone else. Otherwise, this plan she was creating on the fly was never going to work.
“All right then, let’s go get your girl.” Stuart pulled on Cherish’s wrist once more.
“I am not going barefoot to get her a donut.”
“She’d be impressed.” Stuart’s confidence made her have to hold back a giggle. She loved when he got bossy like this. When he wasn’t just placating her nerves but actually forcing her to do something about them.
“What are you up to, Stuart Glenn Barkley?”
“Firstly, that’s just mean.” Stuart narrowed his eyes but the small smile on his lips took away any sternness.
“And secondly?”
“Hurry up and get your shoes or you’re going over my shoulder.”
“Don’t you dare.” Cherish squawked as she raced away from his reaching arms. She slipped on the first pair of shoes she found and returned to the door, wallet and keys now in her back pockets.
“Has she ever seen you in jeans before?”
“Nope.” Cherish bit her bottom lip.
“Well, it’s about time she got to know all of you.”
Cherish couldn’t agree more as she followed Stuart downstairs and to her car.
As they slipped into the vehicle, Cherish pried one more time. “How did you get here?”
“No more questions.” He clicked his belt into place. “Time to focus on the mission.”
The donut shop’s lights were on, but the place had never been so empty. Cherish hadn’t been there many times. She hadn’t been kidding about how much they cost. But still, there was no line, and no one sitting at the booths along the glass windows.
“Something’s very odd about this,” Cherish said as she pushed through the doors and opened them up to music she had never heard in this place before. Familiarity washed over her, but there were no words, just soft music in the background.
She couldn’t quite place it and shook her head to rid her of the annoyance she knew it would become later when she still hadn’t put a name to the song.
Stuart sidled up beside her and looked in at the display case. “None of them have prices?”
“Don’t want to scare away potential customers,” Cherish mumbled, not wanting the owners to overhear the conversation.
“What will you get her?”
Cherish looked around, lips puckered in annoyance until she found a bell. A half-circle silver one with a button on top. She tapped it with precision and the sound rang out crisp and sharp.
“I want to make a custom one.”
“Saying what?”
“I’m an idiot, give me another chance,” Cherish muttered and then froze at the sound of laughter. It wasn’t Stuart’s guffaw, but a rich sound that filled her head every time she closed her eyes.
Slowly, cheeks on fire, Cherish turned around, her heart in her throat.
“Haylee.” Cherish held her breath and then words tumbled out without thought or permission. “I’m so sorry. For everything. I’ve been such an idiot, like a complete and utter idiot. I’ve tried so hard not to be the stupid country girl in the big city, but here I am being exactly that. Your idea was never the problem, you were never the problem, I’m the problem. But that’s what therapy can be for and—” Cherish cut herself off as she focused on Haylee’s smile and silent chuckle.
“Hey.” Haylee’s chuckle softened into the sweetest smile Cherish had ever seen. It lit Haylee up in a spotlight while everything else disappeared.
“Hi.” Cherish stepped forward, pulled into the gravity of Haylee’s existence. “What are you doing here?”
“Well, I did have a plan, but a little birdie told me that we aren’t so different after all. So I changed my plan.”
“What?”
“Read it out loud. Please?” Haylee handed over a small white box.
Cherish opened the box and smiled down at a custom iced donut. Her eyebrows crinkled as she saw what was written on top. She opened her mouth to ask, to demand it make sense, but instead she closed her eyes.
All along, it had never truly been about love. She understood that now. Love could exist and could be worth it. But not without a little bit of trust and faith.
Opening her eyes again, Cherish smiled at Haylee. She could do that. She could have faith and trust in them. Hope in what they were building together. Cherish was about to speak when Haylee shook her head, her eyes glittering with mischief.
“Alexa,” Haylee started, still grinning like a fool. “Play Cherish by Madonna. Volume up.”
Haylee’s laugh reverberated through Cherish’s chest as the music she hadn’t recognized earlier played louder. Haylee clasped onto Cherish’s hands and immediately spun her into a circle as they started dancing, Haylee humming and singing right along with Madonna.
Cherish laughed out loud, closing her eyes and letting the song wash over her. She wrapped her arms around Haylee’s back as they swayed to the beat of the music. She closed her eyes on a deep breath, gathering herself before she reached up and cupped Haylee’s face in her hands, stopping them right in the middle of the donut shop.
“I love you,” Cherish whispered.
“I love you, too.” Haylee smiled, her eyes glistening.
They had kissed so many times, heated and rushed, promising a night of bliss and forgetting. But this time, Cherish drank in Haylee’s taste and the sensation of every movement of lips against her own. She breathed deeply the sense of newness and love. She opened her heart, letting Haylee in more than she’d ever let someone before.
Cherish grinned as she pulled away, tears on her cheeks again, but this time, they were tears of joy. Haylee cleared them away and kissed her again, but she kept this one brief.
“We’re not alone,” Haylee murmured. “I’m not sure how much PDA you’re prepared for.”
Leave it to Haylee to think of that. Cherish’s eyes widened as she pulled away, silently thanking Haylee’s forethought. Glancing around, she found Stuart and another man she didn’t know. But she would have bet he was Haylee’s brother. He looked so much like her.
“Thanks, Jackson.” Haylee scrunched up her face, and Cherish pulled her in closer. “Nice job of staying outside and giving us our moment.”
“Yes, thank you, Jackson.” Cherish turned back to Haylee and pulled her closer once more, unable to resist those lips that she hoped she would kiss for the rest of her life. And if not, the time she got to would be worth it.