Chapter 05
“Want some more coffee, Joe?“
I ask. He nods, slides his mug toward me, and I fill it up.
It’s been two weeks since the photoshoot and my evening spent with Valerie.
I told her over coffee the following morning to ask Paul to junk my car. There was no point in having someone look at it. Instead, I’m now saving money specifically for a car. Kira has been giving me as many shifts as she can to help me out.
Valerie dropped me off after a morning spent swapping stories and dreams, but when I walked into my tiny apartment, it hit me. We are far too different. I didn’t feel it that day, or during the night wrapped up in her arms and tangled in her sheets. But I felt it when I was on my lumpy couch.
Meeting Valerie helped me to sort through my own messy thoughts and feelings and trauma from living with Ethan, from living with my demanding mother before that. She helped me see that not everyone will treat me like Ethan did, which I sincerely needed. I needed someone to tell me I’m good enough, but I know I still have work to do.
So, I went back to my regular life, but with purpose. Save enough money for a good car. Save enough money for new furniture. Figure out what I want to do with my life, because as much as I adore Kira, working at the diner long term isn’t it.
The bell above the door jingles and two women wearing baseball hats walk in.
"Sit wherever you'd like," I tell them. "I’ll be over as soon as I finish ringing up this customer."
I hand Joe his change then grab the coffee pot and walk over to the newcomers. When I reach their table, I turn over their mugs and raise the pot.
“Coffee?” I ask.
“Ella?”
It’s a miracle I don’t drop the coffee.
“Valerie? Hi. Hello. Umm,“
I sputter. “Hi.”
I take her in. Just as beautiful as she was two weeks ago. She has her hair in a ponytail poking out the back of a light pink baseball hat. She looks beautiful in dark wash jeans and a white T-shirt. She’s dressed down but she still takes my breath away. My eyes slide over to her companion.
Holy shit. It’s Crystal Harlow.
Crystal is dressed just as casual, though her baseball hat is dark blue and her hair is down.
“What are you doing here?“
I ask, turning my gaze back to Valerie.
“My sister,“
Valerie nods at Crystal, “is in town for a while. We’re getting breakfast and then going shopping.”
I nod and fill up their mugs even though no one said yes to the coffee.
“Good. That’s good.“
God, I want to slap myself for how awkward I’m being. I just never expected to see her again.
“Wait,“
Crystal says, her eyes looking from Valerie to me, then back to Valerie. “Is this the Ella?”
My eyes widen. Did Valerie tell her sister about us? Was it good? Am I about to get yelled at by her super famous sister at my job?
Valerie’s cheeks redden and she says, “Yes. Ella, meet my sister Crystal. Crystal, meet Ella.”
“You weren’t kidding, Val.“
Crystal takes her time looking me over. What the hell does that mean?
“Umm, do you want some time to look over the menu?” I ask.
Crystal tilts her head. “Actually, what I’d like is to know why you ignored my sister’s calls and texts after your night together.”
“Crystal,“
Valerie warns. “It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not, Val.“
Crystal crosses her arms over her chest and stares at me.
Shit. “Alright.“
I pull out a chair and sit down. It’s not busy and Kira can handle anything the other customers need. I focus on Valerie and not the scary pop princess to my right. “I really like you. I had so much fun with you. But this is my life.“
I gesture to the restaurant. “I left a controlling, narcissistic man in Toronto. On paper, our life together was perfect. But it wasn’t. None of what we had together was what I wanted. It took me years to leave. Years to believe in myself, that I deserved more. It took moving across the country and starting over from scratch to begin to like myself again. I’m learning who I am, but I’m a work in progress. The way I dress, how I do my makeup, how I eat, all of that’s the me I’m supposed to be, but it’s still new and scary. I don’t really know who I am yet and I don’t know what I could offer you.”
Valerie takes my hand in hers. “For the record, I think you are beautiful and brave. Your ex is an asshole. No one should be made to feel like they can’t shine and be themselves. And Ella? You’re brilliant.”
I have nothing to say to that, so I follow a crack in the tabletop with my finger and try to be cool in front of the woman who made me feel like the best version of myself and her incredibly famous, like literally her song is playing on the radio right now, sister.
“Would it be okay if I came back another time to eat?“
Valerie asks me shyly.
“I’d like that.“
I stand on shaky legs, giving them privacy to enjoy their coffees.