Chapter 01 PETER

A single red leaf falls onto my windshield in the shape of a broken heart.

Fitting.

It’s midday, and my body revolts at the idea of getting my picture taken. I don’t feel attractive and will feel even less attractive when I get in there.

I check my phone and see the picture of Todd and me on our honeymoon in Paris. No matter how hard I try, I can’t bring myself to remove it from my home screen.

Don’t worry, Todd’s not dead. He left me for someone 13 years younger. Now, do I wish he were dead?

My phone buzzes in my hand, almost sending me through the roof. I check the screen, and see the devil woman who did this to me.

Angela: Are you there yet?

I’m pretty sure my eye roll has made a full rotation around the planet.

I can’t believe you convinced me to do this! What was I thinking?

After Todd left me, Angela swooped in to pick up the pieces. We’ve been best friends since our freshman year of high school. When she asked me out on a date and, on said date, we kissed in the backseat of my parents’ Honda Civic, and she screamed, “I knew you were gay.”

Angela: Are you sitting in your car like a Grumpy Gus?

I’m not a Grumpy Gus!

Angela: Get in there! She’s waiting for you. I told her she has to send me stills so I can see how cute you look.

All of this is a morale boost. I’m beyond grateful to have a friend like Angela, but her remedies for complicated feelings tend to lean to the extreme. Like this, setting me up as a model for a couples shoot to show me how “gorgeous“

I still am.

Todd and I had been together for ten years. He’s 38, and I’m 41. I was never one of those people who cared about age. I embraced turning 40, but when Todd left me for a 28-year-old sixteen months later…

Well, needless to say, I got a little self-conscious.

Are you literally texting with the photographer or something?

Angela: Of course! She’s super sweet, and you’re going to have a blast with your session partner.

Another thing I’m dreading. I actually have to meet this person and somehow magically conjure chemistry. Good God.

I’m going to be awkward as hell. You know that, right?

Angela: No, you won’t. You’re going to get all lovey-dovey with a hot model who is going to think you’re smoking hot, too!

I seriously doubt that.

This is just a regular couples shoot, right? Nothing crazy? Is this still all about capturing chemistry and the beauty of fall, or is that a big ruse?

The dreaded three dots appear, disappear, then reappear in rapid succession. My stomach drops. If I know her, this is something crazy…

Shelly: Okay, jigs up. It’s a dungeon scene. BDSM. Think blindfolds and whips.

I AM LEAVING!

Shelly: I’M KIDDING! It’s a totally normal couples shoot. Mild intimacy at best. But please send me a selfie of your face right now, because I know it’s priceless.

You’re in big trouble.

Angela: I’ll make it up to you with drinks at Sky Lounge.

You better…

Angela: Get in there! Have fun :-*

I know I’m going to need more than just one happy hour to recover from this ordeal. The picture of Todd and me reappears onscreen—like it's slapping me in the face. I thought I’d found my forever person. Getting back on the market at freaking 41? It makes me want to cry, but I don’t have any tears left to shed.

My groan could rattle concrete as I shove my dumb phone in my pocket and slam the car door behind me.

I just need to buck up and get through this. Maybe I’ll get a couple of pictures to use for the OK Cupid profile I’m dreading to create.

Is OKCupid even a thing anymore?Can’t think about that.

Just get in there, smile, and leave.

If ads affect your reading experience, click here to remove ads on this page.