Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter
Twenty-Five
Naina’s Anti-Honeymoon Checklist
Blow money on something extravagant.
Naina’s words hung in the air, in the sudden, impossibly wide distance between them, as she stepped away and ran her sweaty palms down her dress.
She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t let Tejas do this.
He was going to confess his love and it would ruin everything when she couldn’t say it back.
It would end the night on the worst possible note, making this a trip to remember for all the wrong reasons.
It would leave a bad taste in both of their mouths anytime they thought of Goa in the days, months, and years to come.
More than that, it would break Naina’s resolve to let him go, completely, out of sight, out of mind, out of her heart.
She wouldn’t allow it.
“Don’t,” she repeated, even as her lower lip wobbled. She let out a shaky sigh and looked at the sea, unable to meet his gaze. “These past two weeks have been wonderful. I can’t thank you enough. But…tomorrow, it’ll be goodbye forever. Let’s not make it harder than it has to be.”
“Naina, I—look at me, please.”
Slowly, she turned his way, her own eyes blurring at the sight of the lone tear falling down his cheek. “Let’s just enjoy tonight,” she insisted. “Let’s not ruin these final twelve hours.”
“No,” Tejas said, and for the first time in two weeks, he sounded agitated, borderline angry. “Tell me your last name, Naina.”
Her eyes twitched, then shut. “I can’t.”
“Tell me where you’re going, then, or what you do for work.”
“No.”
“Please, just—”
She silenced him with a kiss, but before she could soak in the touch of his lips or his beard prickling her chin, she pulled away, stepping backward, away from the railing, and wiped a tear from her eye.
“This would never work in the real world, and you know it. We’re just two messed-up, broken people who needed each other to be their human Band-Aids so they could move on from their exes. ”
Tejas’s body visibly deflated; he clenched the front of his shirt, over his heart. “You’re not just a Band-Aid to me. You’re so much more.”
“We can’t. We shouldn’t. I—I’m sorry.” She exhaled shakily through tears. “Maybe…maybe one day. If we met again.”
He stared back at her, his chest rising and falling, then leaned forward and kissed Naina on the cheek. “Okay,” he said finally, and she breathed in the mingling scents of his champagne breath and woodsy aftershave.
“Shall we go back to our table?” she suggested, taking both his hands in hers as she forced herself to smile. “It’s such a perfect night. I don’t want it to end on a bad note.”
He swallowed, then nodded. “Sure.”
They made small talk while Martin came over to clear their plates. The meal had been paid for already, Naina and Tejas had split the cost, so she handed their server a generous tip, returning his eager smile. “Thank you for a wonderful experience,” she said, and Martin nearly blushed.
“My pleasure, madam, sir,” he said, bowing. “Your cab is waiting to take you back.”
Tejas took Naina’s hand and helped her down the ladder, and she decided not to protest. She might not have let him say it with words, but she knew that wouldn’t stop him from showing it with his actions. Not that it would change her mind.
The cab ride to the hostel was supercharged with tension, a heavy silence in the air, but Naina didn’t let go of Tejas’s fingers wrapped around hers.
She laid her head on his shoulder, he let his head fall on top of hers, and they stayed that way, not talking, until she spoke.
“My flight takes off around noon, and I already called a taxi for nine a.m.”
“Right.” He swallowed; she felt the movement against her cheek. “My bus leaves tomorrow night.”
She exhaled softly. “Could you drop me off at the airport? I don’t want to do a rushed goodbye in the hostel while you’re still packing your things.”
Tejas stiffened. “Of course,” he said finally, turning his face so his lips met her cheek.
When they were back in the room and the door had shut behind them, Naina pulled him closer so their foreheads touched. “I want you one more time,” she said before dragging her mouth along his stubble. She undid the buttons of his shirt and exhaled. “One last time.”
Tejas didn’t speak; he only pulled her closer and zipped down her dress until it pooled at her feet. In between kisses, he picked her up and pressed her down to the lower bunk bed, settling himself in between her legs while she sat up to take off his belt and pants.
“No,” he said, easing her back down.
Naina stared up at him, confused. “What—”
He hoisted her left ankle on his shoulder and took her right ankle in his hands, his eyes turning molten.
“If tonight is the last time,” he said, trailing his tongue along her ankle as she gasped, “then I’m going to touch and taste and kiss every fucking part of you.
I’m not going to stop until I have you memorized. ”
“O-okay,” Naina said as she swallowed. She traced the inseam of his pants with her foot, and he trembled. “But only if I get to memorize you too.”
“Deal,” he said before he pulled her closer, letting her thighs tighten around his neck.
With every passing second, Naina seared this perfect moment into her brain, never to be tarnished.
The bucking of her hips as she finished, the hunger in his gaze when she pinned him down and dropped her mouth to his bulge, the urgency with which she rolled the condom onto his length and straddled him, and every single thing they’d left unsaid as she came undone.
His arms slid out from over her hips, and he stood. Naina hated how every nerve and fiber in her body screamed in protest; she hated the knowledge that despite wanting to let go of him, she would never forget what it was like to have him, kiss him, touch him.
What it was like to know him.
But she didn’t know him, not really. After tomorrow, she never would. Time had run out on their story, if it had ever even begun at all.
She got up, pulling her hair into a messy bun, forcing herself to keep it together. “Wow,” she said. “I think that was our best yet.”
“Yeah,” he replied. “Definitely.”
She smiled weakly at him, then tugged on her pajamas. “I’d better finish packing.”
“Do you need help?” Tejas asked, his eyes sweeping across the room.
“I don’t think so,” she replied, dragging her suitcase out from the corner and unzipping it. “You should get ready for bed. We’ll have to be up early for the cab.”
Tejas went to the bathroom, his toothbrush in hand, and Naina got to work stuffing her suitcase with her folded clothes and the trinkets she’d bought for her loved ones back home. She took her towel off the door hook, stowed her iPad and chargers in her carry-on, and packed her toiletries.
When she was done, the half-empty room looked alien, as if the spirit of her alter ego—Naina Stark—had never existed at all.
Good, she thought. Her eyes fell on the bottom bunk bed, where she and Tejas fell asleep cuddling every night, and she hesitated, her legs urging her to nestle into the sheets that smelled just like him.
Then she shook her head and climbed to the top bunk, closing her eyes and willing herself to fall asleep before Tejas came back.
After the conversation on the yacht, he wouldn’t ask her why she was sleeping there instead of in his arms, but she didn’t want to see the look of disappointment in his eyes either way.
The door opened just as the heavy weight in her chest pushed her into a deep slumber.
Naina’s alarm blared out a serene melody at eight a.m. the next morning, and she roused, stifling a yawn. She sat up in bed and stretched, then tapped the wooden frame. “Morning,” she called out. “Did you sleep well?”
Silence.
She frowned. Maybe it was the aftereffects of the champagne and the fact that Tejas was a deep sleeper.
Or maybe it’s something else, she thought, her stomach squirming as she took in the completely bare-bones, empty room.
No laptop on the desk. None of Tejas’s clothes on the messy floor.
Not even his suitcase sitting by the door.
“Tejas?” she said, her voice trembling as a shiver crept down her spine.
No answer.
She scrambled down to the ladder, her breath heavy, and found the bottom bunk empty, the sheets and blanket neatly tucked into the corners. “No,” she whispered as the first tear slid down her cheeks.
Naina left the door swinging on its hinges and her feet still bare in her haste to get to the kitchen, which was empty this early in the morning.
Who in their right hungover mind would bother getting up before nine a.m. while on vacation?
She headed to Aleksy and Jonah’s room and pounded on the door, then paced back and forth, biting her nails as she waited.
After five knocks, Jonah answered the door with messy hair and half-closed eyes. “Hmm?” he said. “Are you leaving now? Have a safe flight.”
“Where’s Tejas?” she exclaimed, trying to peek into their room. Aleksy was still sleeping on the right side of the bed, lost to the world. “Is he here?”
Jonah yawned. “Why would Tejas be here?” He rubbed his eyes and returned to his bed, forgetting to close the door.
Naina pulled it shut and walked back in a daze.
She got into the bottom bunk, pulling the blanket that still smelled like Tejas over herself, and let her face crumple with tears and her body shake with never-ending sobs.
Why was she crying? Wasn’t this what she wanted, for them to walk out of each other’s lives without looking back? Why was she grieving something she didn’t want to have, someone she would never meet again?
Maybe it was for the best that he’d left without a proper goodbye.
This is fine, Naina decided as she sat up and wiped her tears. This was proof that she shouldn’t let someone in again. Never again would she cry over a man. Never again would she give someone false hope only for her own heart to betray her. Never, ever again.