Chapter 35
35
SKYE
He gazed at her, looking worried, and she felt her insides melt as his eyes locked with hers.
Studying his handsome face gazing down at her, his wavy black hair falling forward slightly over his face and his deep, navy eyes gazing intently at her, all she wanted to do was kiss him again.
Not that she should have kissed him earlier. It was unfair of her to do what she had done when she had intended on speaking to him about her concerns, but stupidly she couldn’t seem to help herself. Now she was probably going to ruin what could have been a perfectly lovely end to their eventful evening. But he needed to know how she felt and the sooner the better before she did anything silly like kiss him again.
‘Skye? Are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?’
She closed her eyes, trying to think clearly, which wasn’t easy when she was so attracted to him. Everything about him was perfect, apart from him doing a dangerous job.
‘I’m sorry I kissed you earlier, Joe.’
He frowned. ‘You are? Why?’
‘Because it wasn’t fair of me.’
His face clouded over and he stared at her for a few seconds without speaking. ‘Why?’
She looked away, unable to bear the confusion on his sweet face.
‘Skye,’ he said gently. ‘What’s the matter? I hope you know you can tell me anything.’
Why was this so difficult? ‘We can’t carry on as we have been, Joe.’
He shrugged. ‘I’m not sure what you mean.’
She explained about seeing him at the rescue earlier. ‘It gave me such a shock to see how dangerous your job is.’
He smiled. ‘It’s not always like that. And that’s the first sea rescue I’ve been involved in.’
‘But it is a dangerous job, isn’t it?’
‘I suppose it can be, but we’re well trained and we have the right equipment.’ He narrowed his eyes. ‘What’s this really about, Skye?’
She groaned. ‘I’ve lost too many people in my life to bear the thought of getting close to you and risk losing you too.’
She waited for him to react but he just stared at her looking bemused.
‘Joe?’
He shook his head. ‘I’m not sure what I can do about that. It’s what I do. What I love doing.’
‘Yes, and I would never presume to expect you to change that, but I’m not sure I can stand being with someone and not knowing whether they’ll come home in one piece at the end of a shift.’
Hearing herself saying it out loud gave her worries gravitas, but he didn’t agree with her. She waited for him to speak and hoped he could understand.
‘I see where you’re coming from, but surely everyone takes risks constantly in their lives. You do with all your travelling. All your plane trips. The vehicles you must have ridden in when you were away.’ He shrugged one shoulder. ‘The train trips back in Scotland. Car trips. Do you worry about those each time you embark on one?’
She shook her head slowly. ‘I suppose not.’ She began to feel a little silly. What he said made good sense.
‘Skye, I don’t know about your feelings for me and I know we’ve only known each other a short while, but I find myself liking you more each day. Of course I’ll understand if you decide you don’t want to take what we had together any further. If you do though, I’m happy to try and find a solution.’
She hadn’t expected this and wondered what he would say next. ‘Like what?’
‘I’m not sure yet.’
She stared at his mouth as he spoke and wanted more than anything to erase the conversation she had just instigated and kiss him. Be carefree for once in her life and not try to control the outcome to a relationship that had barely begun.
‘What are you thinking?’ he asked, narrowing his eyes, his mouth turning up at the sides in a smile.
Unable to help herself, Skye pushed aside all thoughts of being sensible and pushed him backwards before leaning into him and kissing him.
He reacted instantly and for a moment Skye lost herself in the thrill of kissing him again. ‘Sorry,’ she said, sitting back slightly. ‘I don’t know what’s got into me tonight. I seem to be suffering a roller coaster of emotions.’
‘Don’t stop on my account.’ Joe leant back on the sofa, clasped his hands together and stretched his arms above him. ‘This has been an eventful evening in one way and another.’ He sighed happily.
Skye wished her eyes weren’t immediately drawn to the space between the bottom of his T-shirt and the top of his faded jeans. What was it about his slightly tanned, taut lower stomach that sent her crazy? Surely sexy parts of his body was the last thing she needed to be staring at when she was trying to be sensible for both their sakes.
She sensed him looking at her and saw him lower his arms, pulling his top down slightly, probably confused by her erratic behaviour. Embarrassed to have been caught staring at his lower abdomen, Skye reached out to collect their plates but before she could touch them, Joe rested his hand on her arm, sending tingles like electric raindrops flickering through her body.
‘We don’t have to clear those away just yet, do we?’
Unsure why she seemed to have forgotten how to speak, Skye shook her head slowly and cleared her throat. ‘Um, I suppose we don’t.’
What was she thinking? Of course they didn’t. It wasn’t as if anyone else was even in the house. Feeling his palm against her forearm still, she looked into his eyes and a pang of lust hit her deep in her stomach.
‘Would you mind if I kissed you?’ Joe said, his voice barely above a whisper.
‘Er, no.’ Why had her voice come out all squeaky?
Joe didn’t appear to have noticed and, taking his hand from her arm, moved closer to her, turning his body fully to face her. She leant into him, unable to help herself. After a brief kiss, Joe took her into his arms, kissing her, hard.
This time though he was the one to suddenly stop, disappointing Skye. She wasn’t ready to stop kissing this gorgeous guy. He moved a few inches back from her and gave her a half-smile that seemed to her to be something of an apology.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said, as if sensing what she was thinking.
‘Is everything all right?’ Skye asked, not able to tell him she had been hoping for more.
He kissed her lightly on the lips, his hand running down her hair. ‘Nothing is wrong. In fact I don’t think anything has ever felt this right to me.’
‘Me, too,’ she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. She didn’t understand his reluctance to continue and hoped he would enlighten her a little more.
Without taking his eyes from hers, Joe said, ‘I worry if we start something here what might happen when you leave the island.’
‘You’re worried about my feelings?’ She was about to tell him she was a big girl and could take care of herself. ‘I’m not that fragile, if that’s what you’re worried about.’
He stared at her, a slight frown crossing his face briefly. ‘It’s not just you I’m worried about.’ A loving gaze radiated from his blue eyes. ‘I’m also worried about me.’
‘You are?’ She wasn’t sure why she was surprised to hear him speak like this. Perhaps she had presumed a gorgeous man who looked like Joe must be tough, but clearly there was a much gentler side to him. And tonight she had been saying one thing and acting in a completely different way. She knew she should be relieved he wasn’t too fazed by her erratic behaviour, but it didn’t help her frustration that she really wanted more from him.
‘Does that make me sound ridiculous?’
Hating to think she had made Joe question his reaction when all he was doing was try to stop either of them being hurt, Skye took one of his hands in hers.
‘No, of course it doesn’t. You’re a lovely guy and you care about others’ feelings.’ Forcing a smile, Skye raised his hand and kissed the back of it. ‘I did enjoy kissing you though. Maybe we could have just one more?’