Chapter 1
It was only a fortnight ago when I thought all was going perfectly in our lives.
However, I did plaster on a smile as Demetri walked back into my lounge after taking yet another call and then moving out of the room.
I kept telling myself I had nothing to worry about; remind myself that everyone kept saying he was one of the good guys.
But if that was the case, why did he keep taking mysterious phone calls and saying that it was nothing to concern myself with, when I knew him well enough to read between the lines?
I knew that when he was fretting, he frowned.
And he might have been smiling at me, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes, and I could see the tension in his shoulders.
‘Everything OK?’ I had asked him, already knowing what the answer would be.
Maybe that was why I asked, to be honest. Because I needed to hear the words from his mouth even though I knew they weren’t true.
Before my brain ran away with me again and made up some ridiculous scenario about things he was keeping from me.
Before my brain reverted to the Michelle of years ago when my insecurities were rife.
He leant down to where I was sitting on the sofa and kissed my nose.
‘Yeah, everything is fine, my love. Just some stuff going on back at home. Nothing to worry about. This is my first weekend off in ages, and I don’t want to spoil my time off with you worrying about things at home.
’ He picked up the remote control and shuffled into the space beside me on the sofa he’d left fifteen minutes earlier when his phone had rung. ‘So where were we?’
Demetri worked ridiculously long hours and we’d been looking forward to spending the weekend together for so long.
Lifting his arm up so I could snuggle up against him, he put the film back on. I tried to settle back down but the mood had become slightly spoiled. I could feel his agitation as he was jiggling his leg. The whole sofa was vibrating and I put my hand on his knee to stop him.
He turned his face to mine and tilted my chin towards him. My breath hitched as he kissed me gently on the lips and I pushed all those doubts away. After his kiss became deeper, he switched gears again, moving his mouth millimetres away from mine and whispered against my lips.
‘I wasn’t enjoying that film anyway.’
‘What film?’ I whispered and kissed him right back.
Dating a doctor who worked in a busy A sometimes I had to listen hard to make sure he was actually breathing.
This was not a problem that he had with me. Apparently I slept like a rhino.
Last night, I did try to wake Demetri as I thought he’d want to go home, but he was dead to the world. And waking up beside him felt right. Him staying over was getting more frequent and I liked it. A lot.
Creeping out of bed so I didn’t wake him, I carefully grabbed my robe, closed the door behind me and headed into the kitchen, where I flicked on the kettle.
Outside, it was a beautiful spring day and I noticed that bluebells were starting to flower, bringing colour to the stunning landscape: the golden sand dunes and the green grassy banks that parted to form a natural path through the sand down to the sea.
We had planned to go out for breakfast, but I wanted him to wake naturally when his body had had enough sleep. Nothing worse than being woken up on your day off, and I had plenty to be getting on with. I had a list of things to do as long as my arm, so it would be good to make a start on that.
When I took a leap of faith and moved to Cornwall to start my own PR and marketing business, I had no idea how busy I might be and while it was great to be building a large and influential client base, it was blooming hard work when there was only me.
In my previous role, I’d had a whole team of people working underneath me and I was very good at delegating.
Now there was no one else to delegate to so I was the office junior, the accountant, the sales team and the social media manager all in one, and at the same time as working on PR and marketing campaigns for other people, I was also doing the same for my own company.
It was actually handy that Demetri was at the hospital as much as he was.
I’m sure other people might not be quite so understanding of their partner being a workaholic, but what it did mean was that when he worked, I worked and then I tried to take time off with him when he wasn’t on shift.
As my own boss, I planned my own time, so I took it upon myself to make sure our schedules aligned.
What I hadn’t realised was how much running my company would be on my mind all of the time.
It was all consuming. However, it was going so well and luckily business was booming so I was making the absolute most of it.
I was even considering taking on another member of staff at some point, although that was quite scary.
Opening my laptop, I became engrossed on the website of a virtual assistant company in the Midlands.
It was run by a lady called Jane that a friend of a friend had recommended to me.
It was another option for the time being – to pay them an hourly rate rather than take someone on full time.
Along with all the HR side of things and the extra responsibilities that come with having employees, it made sense.
Footsteps padded across my bedroom floor and I heard the door open behind me. I sighed with contentment as two big strong arms engulfed me from behind and pulled me backwards to where I nestled into a dark, hairy chest.
‘Good morning, gorgeous.’
As I bent my head to one side, Demetri showered my neck with gentle kisses, and a shiver ran down my spine.
It was a feeling that both delighted me and scared the living daylights out of me.
I felt desirable and loved, yet vulnerable and susceptible to being hurt.
For years I’d protected myself, shut myself off to love, and now I felt like my insecurities were there for the taking, but where this man was concerned I didn’t seem to be able to stop myself.
‘Any coffee on offer?’ he asked.
‘You do know that you drink way too much coffee, don’t you?’
‘Yeah, it’s part of the job role,’ he replied, laughing. ‘Anyway, have I missed breakfast?’
I glanced at the clock and realised that I too had missed breakfast, deeply engrossed in my list of jobs, internet hours seemingly containing way less than sixty minutes. I stood and poured him a coffee from the stovetop espresso maker and passed him the mug.
‘Fancy a late brunch instead?’
‘Perfect.’ He gulped at the liquid, wincing at the heat, but drinking it anyway.
I’d once questioned him how he actually did that and he said that when you worked in a busy A&E department, you never knew what was coming.
If you didn’t drink or eat when you got the chance, it could be hours before you got the chance again.
It couldn’t be good for your gut health.
But then again, he was the doctor, not me.
‘Do you need to do some more work?’ he asked.
I chewed the inside of my lip and looked at my list. I shook my head.
‘Nothing that can’t wait.’
‘That’s good.’ He put his empty cup down on the table next to me and took my hand, helping me to stand, and then started leading me towards my bedroom.
‘It’s just that I was thinking of having a shower and thought you might like to join me.
’ He walked backwards, his eyes locked onto mine, and pulled me with him.
‘Oh, well, when you put it like that, I suppose I could…’
That was just a few days before his big revelation. My! Hadn’t things changed.