Chapter 19
When I arrived home, deep in thought, I had totally forgotten that I had a guest. Makis was sat on the sofa with his feet up on the pouffe.
The TV was still on, and his head was back against the sofa, the remote control in his hand, and he was fast asleep and snoring quietly.
He looked so like his brother in that moment that it took my breath away.
For a split second, I forgot that Demetri had gone back to Greece, and I nearly threw myself in the vacant space next to him, to snuggle in under his arm.
This had occurred so many times when I’d had Friday nights with the girls and he had snuck in when he’d finished work.
Those nights were some of my favourites, both of us too tired to do anything but sleep, wanting and needing that closeness of each other.
I particularly loved the next mornings, when I left him to sleep and got up and sat drinking my morning coffee.
It was as if everything had been perfect in my world, before it all fell apart and he left me.
I hated that the story of my life was that everyone left me.
First my boyfriend, then my mum, then my boyfriend again, then my dad.
And then, when I needed him more than I’d ever needed him before, my brother went to live on the other side of the world, leaving me too.
It was no wonder I was scared to pour my heart and soul into someone else.
Look what happened when I did. I was almost expecting it to happen with Demetri from the very first day I met him.
I wondered in some way whether I’d manifested it, whether I had been testing him.
Pushed him into it. Whatever and however it had come about, he’d gone.
Despite me putting a brave face on to everyone in my life, them thinking that I had picked myself up, dusted myself down and was getting on with life, and was perfectly fine, I missed him more than I was admitting to anyone.
The person I was lying to the most was myself and I could feel the sting of tears and the pain in my heart as I realised that I couldn’t keep pushing this feeling away.
I had done this when my parents had passed away – within six months of each other – and then my boyfriend left at a similar time.
The death of one parent was a lot to bear; the death of two, traumatic.
There were some days that I thought I’d never get through.
But I did. And more recently, I had learned to give in to my feelings and open my heart to Demetri – because of his nature and his wonderful patience – with encouragement from my friends.
I had given myself permission to love again.
Demetri felt like he was a little bit of glue that had started to put me back together.
I knew that I would get over him; over us, in time.
Because nothing could be as bad as losing my parents.
Makis stirred, jolting me back to the present.
I didn’t want him to wake up and think I’d been staring at him, which of course I had been.
I skedaddled quietly back into the kitchen and pottered around tidying things which really didn’t need tidying, so hopefully by the time Makis joined me, he never even knew I’d been in the lounge.
‘Hey!’ His sleepy, husky voice did something to my insides that I never knew possible.
‘Hi,’ I croaked back, turning to put a cup which was already clean in the sink and washing it up. I just needed a moment to compose myself.
‘Good evening?’ he asked.
‘Yes.’ I smiled. ‘Lovely, thanks. Did you do anything?’
‘Walked into town and had a drink in the pub. Nice place by the way. Then I came back and watched a film. I must have fallen asleep, because I heard you in here and then realised I had no idea what had happened at the end.’
‘Ah, good. Glad you had a nice night too.’
‘Yes, very relaxing, just what I needed after a busy few weeks of working and travelling.’ He stretched his arms above his head and his T-shirt rode up, exposing a dark line of hair leading southwards to somewhere that I really shouldn’t even be thinking about.
‘Did you think about our conversation earlier?’ he asked.
‘I’ve thought of nothing else, and if you are sure, then I’d like to take you up on your offer.’
Makis grinned. ‘Amazing. I knew it was an offer you can’t refuse. You can’t lose. I’ll get onto it straight away.’
‘It can wait till tomorrow, there’s no rush,’ I offered.
‘We should strike while the iron is hot. Is that the right expression?’
I nodded.
‘I’m wide awake now and night-time is always best for these transactions.
I spoke to my contact earlier and he’d given me some advice and I was going to invest some money of my own tonight too.
It’s always great to wake up in the morning and see that your money has grown while you’ve been sleeping. How much do you want to go for?’
‘Would two and a half thousand pounds be OK do you think?’ I didn’t know whether to go higher or lower to be honest. Didn’t want him to think I was tight, but at the same time, if he was going to have to pay me back if it didn’t work out, then I didn’t want to take advantage.
He pulled a face and then nodded.
‘OK, let’s start small. I’ll give you my bank details and then if you put the money into my account now, I’ll get on it.’ He rubbed his hands together. ‘Don’t look so worried, Michelle. It’ll all work out.’
I logged on to my laptop and transferred the money over to the details he gave me.
I stood and stretched my neck from side to side to relieve the tension I was feeling in my shoulders.
He got up from his position on the sofa next to me and opened his arms wide.
I stepped into his hug as it would have felt more awkward if I hadn’t.
He held me close, his hands on my back, and I couldn’t help but enjoy the sensation of his warm body against mine.
A body that felt vaguely familiar, and once again I had to pull myself together and remind myself that this was Makis and not Demetri. I gently moved away.
Faking a yawn, I shuffled awkwardly around him, towards the door, and somehow managed to magic up a sleepy voice.
‘Right, I’m shattered. I’ll see you in the morning.
Night.’ I scooted towards my bedroom with a strange little wave that I didn’t think I’d ever done before in my life.
Gosh, these brothers would be the death of me.
Thank goodness I had an en suite bathroom and didn’t need to leave the sanctuary of my room again before morning.
Maybe Jo and Emma looking out for me was the exact thing I needed.
* * *
For the second day on the trot, I’d woken up with a drink-induced headache.
I was determined that I was going to have a day that didn’t end up the same.
That morning, I had an appointment with Jacqui at the doctors.
She’d found that she liked working for a couple of hours on a Saturday.
My appointment was an early one, and then we’d arranged to meet after her early morning surgery to then go for a long walk to the neighbouring town of Driftwood Bay and have lunch there in the bistro.
We’d decide there whether we could be bothered to walk back, else we’d get a taxi.
Although, grabbing a cab was a little difficult sometimes, in this little corner of rural Cornwall, and usually had to be booked weeks in advance.
My business brain immediately saw an opportunity there and I smiled to myself.
Hearing the clink of cups in the kitchen again reminded me of my house guest. I supposed I should get up rather than wallow in bed which I had done for the last few weekend mornings since Demetri’s departure.
The hot water of the shower, and the zingy scent of the citrus shower gel, soon made me feel more human and while towelling myself dry, I wondered if he expected me to keep him occupied while he was here.
I’d already made plans before he arrived, and I supposed he could have come for a walk with us and for lunch, but I was looking forward to chatting with Jacqui.
Without a mother figure in my life, she seemed to have quickly filled the gap.
She was wise, and bubbly and lovely company.
I really admired her no-nonsense attitude to life.
She certainly didn’t take any shit from anyone.
On a few occasions, Jo, Emma and I had asked each other ‘what would Jacqui do?’ and it always made us smile.
Asking myself what she’d do in this situation made me think that she wouldn’t be sitting around wondering what he was doing for the rest of the day.
I slipped on my underwear, a pair of cut-off denim shorts, and a floaty blue short-sleeved blouse.
Gathering my hair into a top knot and securing it in place with a clip, I channelled my inner Jacqui and decided that never again would I put my life on hold for a man.
I pulled my shoulders back, blew myself a kiss in the mirror and walked out into the lounge.
‘Morning, Michelle. How are you?’ Makis was stood leaning up against one of the kitchen cupboards drinking from a mug. I heard the kettle click behind him, indicating that it had just boiled. He offered to make me a coffee.
‘Thanks, you are very kind but it’s OK, I can do it. Excuse me. Can I just move you over?’ We danced around each other, moving from side to side, and my conviction wavered. I forced myself to smile and hoped that it looked more confident than it actually felt.
‘What shall we do today?’ he asked.
I was so glad that I had mentally prepared for this. I’d seen it coming.
‘Well, I have plans so I’m afraid you are going to have to make your own. I’m popping out for a bit after I’ve had a quick coffee and then I have some errands to run before I go off to meet a friend. I’ll be back around teatime I reckon, and I’ll have eaten already so won’t be eating tonight.’
‘Oh.’ The raised tone of his voice made me wonder if it was surprise or disappointment.
But either way, it wasn’t my problem. He wasn’t my problem.
He might have been a stranger in town, but he would have to find himself something to do today.
The night before I had given him the spare key to my home so he could come and go as he pleased.
It seemed only right if he was staying here.
I threw a piece of bread into the toaster.
‘Want some?’ I asked.
He nodded. ‘Yes please.’
Instead of buttering them for him, I passed him the butter, jam and honey and let him do it himself. Yes, he was my guest, but I wasn’t going to wait on him.
He had still given me no indication of how long he was planning on staying.
When we discussed it before, he just said he’d like to hang out in Sandpiper Shore for a while, which told me nothing.
He was the one who had burst into my life like a whirlwind, turning it inside out, so he would have to find himself something to do for entertainment.
Quickly buttering a piece for myself and holding that in one hand, I grabbed my old, faithful, somewhat battered leather cross-body handbag from the kitchen table and shouted after myself, ‘Bye. See you later.’